by Erica Vetsch
Tyler drew a paper out of his breast pocket, and she knew it was her letter. “I have to say, this is most disconcerting. I only this morning received your resignation, and it disturbs me very much.”
Savannah nodded, her chest aching.
“Is anyone else aware of this? The school board? The Halvorsons?”
She shook her head. “I thought you should know first.”
Elias grunted and crossed his arms. He backed up to lean against a windowsill, and his face could’ve been carved from stone.
Tyler sat in the front row where Ingrid usually sat, and put his elbows on his knees. “I’m glad of that, because there’s still time to turn this thing around. It’s not too late to forget all about this letter. Perhaps you were merely overwrought after your ordeal? Or did someone say something to you to make you feel you need to resign? Frankly, I’m baffled.”
Faced with his questions, with the disappointment and puzzlement in Tyler’s eyes, Savannah froze. Elias already knew the reason. Hadn’t he told his brother what had happened? How she’d endangered the children? He had to agree with her decision to resign. After all, he’d been the one to tell her in the first place that she wasn’t equipped to live here, to be in charge of the students.
She studied her hands. “I am not overwrought. No one said anything. I just need to go.”
“But why? What changed? The children love you, the community admires you. You’ve made friends and fit in so nicely, if all the reports are to be believed. I don’t understand it.” Tyler beseeched her.
Elias slammed the stove door. “I don’t know why we’re even asking. Be glad she had the grace to at least tell you she’s leaving, and call it done.” He glared, making Savannah feel small and incapable. “You can’t hold her against her will. If she wants to go, let her. I told you in the beginning it was a mistake to hire someone from so far away. I told you she wouldn’t stick.”
His words pierced deep, and Savannah gasped. She’d known this would be difficult, but his anger rolled off him in waves. He had to be furious with her for being so ignorant about blizzards. When they’d been trapped, he’d hidden his anger well after the first outburst, no doubt to keep the children from being frightened, but now he could let it have free rein. He was probably thinking good riddance.
Aunt Carolina rolled her eyes and sailed up the aisle. “Gentlemen, I suggest you give Savannah and me some privacy. I’ll get to the bottom of things, and we’ll have a resolution one way or another. Perhaps you could take my belongings to Savannah’s lodging place while we sort this out?”
“There’s no room at the Halvorsons’, and there’s sickness in the house.” Elias picked up his hat. “I’ll take your things over to my folks’ place. You can stay there for the next couple of days until the stage comes back. It will take me an hour or so, but I’ll pick you up then.”
Tyler rose, but hesitated.
“Go ahead.” Aunt Carolina flicked her hand toward the door. “I’m sure we can get along better on our own. We will see you in one hour.”
When the door closed, Savannah flew down the aisle and into Aunt Carolina’s arms. The smell of the lavender water she always used surrounded Savannah, and she couldn’t hold back the tears.
After a few moments, Aunt Carolina took her by the shoulders. “Now, now. Brace up, child. I’m glad to see you, too, but this sobbing needs to stop so we can get to the root of the problem. Where is your handkerchief?”
Savannah allowed her aunt to direct her to a chair, comforted at having someone else in charge. She mopped her cheeks and sniffed. “I never expected you to come all this way.”
“I never expected to need to,” Aunt Carolina said, as drily as ever. “Your telegram was much too cryptic for my peace of mind. After all, week by week, we’ve received glowing letters, praising the people, the freedom, the fresh air of Snowflake, then suddenly a telegram saying you have to leave and will be home as soon as you can make arrangements? I packed my bags and was on the train that very night.”
Gratitude welled up, along with more tears, and Savannah swallowed. “Thank you.”
“After all, I feel responsible for all of this.”
“What? Why?”
“I’m the one who let you come here in the first place. The one who let you run away from your troubles. I was of two minds about it at the time, and now I wish I’d put my foot down and forced you to stay.” Aunt Carolina sat on the front bench, crossing her arms and shaking her head. “You ran then, and you’re running now.”
“I’m not running.” It wasn’t running when it was for everyone’s good, was it?
“Suppose you tell me what happened, and I will judge for myself.”
Haltingly, Savannah started with her arrival here and how Elias had been doubtful of her suitability. “And I was proving him wrong. I loved it here. Even though I had some adjusting to do, and a few hiccups.” Not speaking the language, the skunk, the frozen pump handle. “I was succeeding. Until the storm hit. I didn’t realize it was a blizzard. I didn’t know how dangerous it would be to let the children go. If Elias hadn’t come when he did, they all would’ve perished, and I would’ve caused it.”
“It isn’t your fault. You’d never seen a storm like that before. Next time, you’ll know better.”
“It was my fault that we ran out of coal. It was my fault that I was ready to send children out into the teeth of a blizzard. I wouldn’t have known what to do, even if I had kept the children in the school. I would’ve let them all sleep through the night, and they might’ve frozen. Elias knew to wake them up and get them moving. I have nightmares nearly every night that the children are lost and I can’t find them in the storm. Don’t you see? Elias was right. I had no business coming here to teach, being in charge of these students. He’s so angry at me for my stupidity that he can barely be in the same room with me. After all, who’s to say that, next time, my lack of knowledge won’t get someone hurt or killed?”
Aunt Carolina frowned. “What about your contract? What about your obligation?”
“You don’t understand. I can’t stay. I’m jeopardizing the children if I do. When the school board finds out, they’ll be only too glad to see me go. I’m surprised Tyler’s resisting at all. The children’s welfare has to come first.”
“Are you sure it is the children you’re thinking of, or is it your pride?”
Savannah’s chin came up. “My pride? I’m as humbled as I can possibly be. My pride got killed the day Girard walked out on me on our wedding day.” How could Aunt Carolina say such a thing? She had stood there in the church vestibule as all Savannah’s dreams crumbled to dust. She knew how humiliated Savannah had been.
“Are you sure it got killed, or was it just wounded? You ran from Raleigh because you couldn’t stand the pity and the whispers. If your pride was dead, you wouldn’t have cared. Now you’re afraid someone might find out that something you’d never encountered before almost got the better of you, that perhaps you’re not as capable and self-sufficient as you’ve been pretending to be. And there’s one major point that you’ve not mentioned at all.”
Stung, Savannah asked, “What?”
“What about the young man who has been filling up so many pages of your letters? The sheriff, who, if I might say, seemed quite put out and startled at the idea of your resignation. Are you sure you’re not running from him?”
Fisting her hands, Savannah rose. “I am not running from Elias. I’ve explained why I’m unsuited to teach here. The safety of the children is all I am concerned about. Elias is only angry that all his predictions about me have proved true.”
Aunt Carolina sized her up and shook her head. “You sound as if you truly believe that. You’re clearly distraught. We’ll let the matter rest for now. Tell me something about the family I’m to stay with.”
Glad to be on safer ground, Savannah told
her about the Parkers’ comfortable farmhouse and how delightful Ian and Tova were. By the end of the hour, she’d spoken of nearly everyone in the settlement that she knew. Aunt Carolina asked pointed questions, and Savannah answered faithfully.
“You’ve come to know people quite well here. From complete outsider to one of their own, by the sounds of things.”
“Not really. They’ve been very kind, but it was always supposed to be a temporary position. They’ll do much better with someone else. I’ll find another teaching position.”
“In Raleigh?”
“No, but somewhere in the South, no doubt.” Somewhere she knew the culture, the pitfalls, the dangers.
“I hear your young man coming.” Aunt Carolina rose and began buttoning her coat. “We’re not finished discussing this, Savannah. At the very least, I believe you owe it to the people of Snowflake to finish out your contract.”
“And I am just as certain that I should not.”
It wasn’t Elias who opened the door, but Tyler. “Have you changed her mind?”
“She remains adamant at this time.” Aunt Carolina turned to him, leaning on her walking stick. “I shall try again tomorrow. Are your parents prepared to take me in as a guest?”
“Yes, ma’am. My ma is looking forward to getting to know some of Savannah’s family. Savannah, can we give you a ride to the Halvorsons’?”
“You go ahead. I have some things to finish up here.”
As Tyler ushered Aunt Carolina out, Savannah overheard him asking, “Do you think you’ll be able to convince her to stay?”
“It’s too soon to tell. She can be quite headstrong when she latches hold of an idea.”
Savannah shook her head, firming her resolve as she banked the fire and cleaned the blackboard. Aunt Carolina had it all wrong. It wasn’t her pride or her heart that made her have to leave.
It was fear. Fear that Elias had been right all along.
* * *
Elias stayed in the barn until after dark, currying horses, cleaning tack, killing time. He’d seen Savannah arrive to visit her aunt, and the sight of her twisted his muscles. How had he been so wrong?
Were all women fickle? Leading a man to believe he had a chance at winning her heart, at making a life with her, then ripping those hopes to shreds and walking away as if he didn’t matter?
He thrust the pitchfork into the pile of hay and swung down the ladder from the haymow. His stomach rumbled, but he ignored it. Time enough to return to the house when Savannah had gone and their guest was in bed.
He took up a broom and began sweeping the center aisle, clearing stray bits of straw and dirt. The latch lifted on the small door set into the larger rolling one, and Elias looked over his shoulder, expecting his father or brother.
Ma held her lantern high and eased inside the barn, shutting the door behind her to keep out the cold.
Elias stacked his hands on the top of the broom handle and rested his chin on his wrists.
“You did not come in for dinner.” She spoke Norwegian.
“I wasn’t hungry.”
“I think it is something more. Your brother tells me Savannah is leaving?” Ma hung the lantern from a peg and folded her hands at her waist. She wore a scarf over her head, and her heavy coat and mittens. And her most concerned expression.
“That’s what she says.” He flicked the broom, raising a puff of dust.
“Why?”
He shrugged. “She didn’t tell me. She didn’t tell Tyler, either. But it doesn’t matter. She’s just one in a long string of teachers who couldn’t stick it out. I think we’ll be better off to send one of the older girls from here to school somewhere else, and bring her back to teach when she’s trained.”
“You did not have a fight, you two?”
“Nope. Far as I know everything’s the same as it has always been between us. Which isn’t saying much.” He flipped the broom around and hung it in its place among the barn tools. “I told Tyler from the beginning it was a mistake to hire her. She’s a good teacher. And she seemed to fit in fine in Snowflake, but it was all a sham. First time it gets hard, she’s a puff of smoke on the horizon.”
Tova stepped close, taking his face between her hands and staring up into his eyes. “You are lying. To me, yes, but mostly to yourself. I know my son. You care about her, and if she leaves, it will break your heart.”
He swallowed, wanting to jerk his head from her grasp, but not wanting to hurt his mother that way.
“Elias, you fought it for a very long time. Longer than made sense, until I remembered Britta. You thought you were falling in love with her when she left you. Now you are afraid Savannah will do the same thing, only this time, the love is real. Are you going to let her leave without telling her how you feel? Maybe she would stay if she knew the truth.”
“And maybe she wouldn’t.” He covered his mother’s hands with his and drew them down. “If she wants to leave, we can’t make her stay. If she would cut and run without explaining herself, would I really want her to stay at all?”
“You are afraid. You are afraid to tell her how you feel.”
It stuck in his craw, but he had to admit he was. But it was much easier to hide behind anger and pretended indifference.
“Maybe she is also afraid of something? The storm frightened her very much. And Per Halvorson’s illness.” Ma gripped Elias’s hands. “Maybe she is afraid to be here alone without someone to help her, someone to love her and care for her and make her brave.”
And maybe she just wanted out. “Her aunt’s here to take her home. They’ll leave on the Saturday stage, and we’ll never see them again.”
“Only if you let that happen, son.”
Chapter Nineteen
“I can’t help thinking you’re making a mistake.” Aunt Carolina supervised the piling of their bags in the stage office. “Be careful with that harp, young man.”
Savannah sighed, her heart heavy. Yesterday at school had been so hard. The children hadn’t understood, and she couldn’t explain it to them. Every face asked why?
Ingrid had cried. “Do you not like us anymore, Teacher?”
She loved them so much, she had to go.
Even now, waiting for the stage, her throat burned and her eyes welled.
Lars brought in the last bag and added it to the stack. Savannah patted his shoulder. “Thank you, Lars. Remember to keep reading and learning. And tell Rut the same for me.”
“Why should we read and learn? Nobody cares if we have school. The next teacher will not stay. Nobody stays.” He shrugged off her hand.
Savannah sucked in a deep, painful breath. Before she could answer Lars, the door opened again, and a man’s silhouette filled the doorway.
Her heart jammed in her throat.
Elias.
She’d hoped to avoid facing him one last time. And yet she’d longed to see him. She braced herself for whatever he’d come to say.
He didn’t say a word, striding into the room and taking her hand. With a tug, he turned and headed back outside.
“What are you doing?”
Keeping her hand firmly in his, he strode across the street to the jail. Saturday shoppers stopped and gawked on the sidewalks. Savannah looked over her shoulder to where Aunt Carolina stood on the steps, hands on hips, mouth agape.
Savannah tugged against Elias’s grip, but he didn’t loosen his hold. “What are you doing? Let me go.” She wasn’t afraid of him...this was Elias, after all. But his actions puzzled her.
Elias nudged the jailhouse door open and marched straight to the first cell. With a little push, he had her inside, then swung the door shut and locked it. With a clatter, the keys landed on his desk.
So he was upset with her. That was to be expected, but locking her in a jail cel
l? In view of the entire town? Outrage burned through her, and she gripped the bars. “Would you kindly tell me what it is you think you’re doing?”
“I’m arresting you.”
She gasped. “On what charge?”
“Breach of contract.”
“Breach of... That’s preposterous.”
He held up a bundle of papers. “I have your signature right here, a signature I witnessed, by the way. You are contracted to teach at the Snowflake School until the end of May.”
She shook her head. “But nowhere does it say that failure to do so results in incarceration.”
“Savannah.” He threw the papers down on a chair and plunked his hat next to them. Raking his fingers through his hair, he paced the small area in front of the cell. “I’m not letting you go until you tell me why you’re leaving. You owe me at least that much after all we’ve been through.”
She shook her head. “You know why I’m leaving. You’re the only one who does. I’m surprised you haven’t broadcast it to all and sundry, since it completely proves your point.”
He stopped, his brows lowered, questions in his eyes. “If I knew, I wouldn’t be this frustrated. Savannah, what went wrong? I thought, during the storm, that we’d come to an understanding of sorts.”
All her fear and guilt rose up like a monster and enveloped her with strong arms. “We did come to an understanding. I finally admitted that you were right all along. I don’t belong here. It was a mistake coming here at all.”
“Savannah, make sense. How could it be a mistake? People here love you...” He swallowed. “We don’t want to lose you. You’re the best teacher we’ve ever had.”
“How can you say that? You’ve held all along that hiring me was a mistake. And you were right. You were there. I almost killed my students. I was too stupid to know the dangers of a blizzard. You’ve read the newspaper reports, seen the damage the storm did, the lives lost. If you hadn’t arrived when you did, those losses would’ve included the entire Snowflake school. Who is to say that I won’t endanger them further if I stay?” Fear and guilt clogged her throat, and she couldn’t look at him.
