He knew there was no going back with her. He’d been beyond idiotic to think for even a moment there was a chance that things could go back to how they’d been before. It wasn’t possible. Not when he knew what it was like to be with her. Knew the intimacy of her touch, knew the heat of her skin beneath his hands, knew the sound of her voice in his ear, knew the taste of her on his tongue.
He’d been done for the second he kissed her, and he’d been lying to himself to think any differently. He liked it all too much. Liked having her within arm’s reach. Liked talking to her, hearing her laugh. Liked being able to hold her and kiss her. Liked making love to her.
No, he loved making love to her, because he loved her. Was in love with her.
The realization hit him like he’d just been body checked into the boards. It was a force to be reckoned with for sure. Skates out from under him, ass hitting the ice, head ricocheting around in his helmet, wind knocked out of him, hard.
Well, damn, he hadn’t seen that one coming. But he hadn’t seen a lot of things coming. This whole thing with Adele was completely and totally unexpected. But now that he had her, now that he knew what it was like, he didn’t want to let her go.
He never wanted to let her go.
Chapter Twelve
The Perfect Kind of Christmas
Christmas Day
Adele woke to Jace nuzzling the back of her neck. Then he was kissing beneath her ear before moving up and along her jaw. Both of his warm hands were under her shirt, one spread wide at her belly, the other palming a breast, his fingers rasping over her nipple.
“Jace,” Adele moaned his name, one of her hands coming up to the back of his head, her fingers spearing in his hair, and holding him in place. Holding him against her.
“Right here,” he whispered between kisses, the hand at her breast slid over her belly and beneath the top of her panties.
Slowly inching their way down, his fingers traced over her soft skin before he got to the apex of her thighs. Then he was moving over her folds, and sliding two fingers inside of her. It took him absolutely no time at all to get her nice and worked up, but the pleasure was nothing to when he started swirling his thumb over her clit.
“Give me one like this, Del. Come for me.” His voice was all sleep rough and gravely, the scruff of his beard lightly abrading her skin as his mouth moved up and down her throat.
That quickening was already starting up low in her belly, the one that meant she was building to an orgasm. How? How was it possible that her entire body responded to him? How was it possible that he knew what she needed this quickly?
The more he touched her—moved his fingers over her, in her—the more her body moved. She writhed against him, the hard length of him pressing into her bottom. She was right there on the edge, desperate to go over when his teeth lightly bit down where her neck met her shoulder. It didn’t hurt but the sharp sensation sent a bolt of pleasure through her.
Adele cried out as she came, gasping for breath, body still writhing. Jace started kissing her neck again, hands gentling as he brought her back down. But he didn’t stop moving his fingers, not until the very last pulse of her orgasm.
“Roll over,” he whispered as he gently pulled his hand from between her legs. “On your side, facing me.”
The second she was in the position he’d wanted, his lips found hers, his tongue thrusting into her mouth. His hand went to her hip, moving down her thigh and to her knee. His grip tightened and he pulled her leg up and around his waist. She felt the tip of his cock at her entrance, and as he flexed his hips he slowly slid inside of her.
They rocked against each other at a torturously, slow pace. One of his arms was beneath her body, coming up to brace against her back, his hand was at the back of her head and his fingers in her hair. His other arm was wrapped around her waist, that hand at her ass, palming a cheek.
Adele had both of her arms around his shoulders, holding on as they continued to move together. She didn’t think she’d ever been this wrapped up in a man, quite literally. He surrounded her, moved in her, moved with her, overwhelmed her.
But he always overwhelmed her.
They stayed at that pace for a while, until his hand at her bottom tightened and he started to move harder…faster. For the second time that morning, Jace created the perfect rhythm. He sent both of them over the edge and into an explosive orgasm.
As they came down from their high of highs, their mouths didn’t separate. They continued kissing each other in long passionate strokes of their tongues. It was a while before their lips pulled apart, Adele resting her head against Jace’s chest, his heart still pounding erratically through his ribs.
“Merry Christmas, Del,” Jace whispered, placing a kiss to her temple.
“Merry Christmas, Jace,” she whispered back. Her arms tightened around him, not wanting to ever let go.
Except she knew that inevitably she was going to have to. It was part of the deal.
If there was anything that had been reaffirmed that morning, it was that Jace was in love with Adele. It wasn’t a feeling he knew all that well. Hell, it wasn’t a feeling he knew at all. And in any other circumstance, it was a feeling that should have had him running for the hills. But the shock of all shocks, he wasn’t running.
At least not away from it.
He’d woken up that morning like he had the two previous mornings: with a warm, sexy, woman in his arms…a warm, sexy, woman who he always wanted in his arms.
After his not-so-small realization from the night before, making love to her that morning had been an even more intense experience. How could it not be?
He loved her. He loved her.
It changed everything…for him. He just didn’t know if things had changed for her.
For the first time in his life, he was scared to find out the answer. He wasn’t in control. It was something he wasn’t used to at all.
That ticking clock sure was getting louder and louder…and faster and faster. How was it possible that time was speeding up? He didn’t know the how of it, but it sure as hell was happening. So he needed to make the most of all the time he had with her, and hoped to God he figured out what to do next.
They enjoyed another long, lingering shower before breakfast. Their Christmas morning feast was comprised of French toast with sausage (both covered in maple syrup) and a healthy dose of caffeine. It was in the middle of their meal when Jace made a suggestion for their next morning activity.
He’d like to return to bed and indulge a bit more in his favorite morning activity—actually, his favorite activity period, especially with Adele—but he thought a change of scenery might be nice for both of them. Besides, this Christmas was about making memories, something else he was learning to love.
“What would you say to a little hike around the lake?” He asked as he took a sip of his coffee. “I saw snowshoes in the attic.”
“Not that going outside doesn’t sound glorious, but are you getting a little cabin fever?” she asked as she ran her sock covered foot under the leg of his pajama pants and up his bare calf.
“Maybe a little.” He set his mug down on the counter before he reached down, grabbing her foot and pulling it into his lap. “We haven’t really been outside since our Bob the snowman building. I thought some fresh air would be nice.” He pressed his thumbs into the arch of her foot.
Adele closed her eyes, taking in a shallow breath of air as he started to rub her foot. “God, that feels good.”
“Well, how about after our hike, we get in the hot tub, and give each other massages.”
“Ohhhhhh.” Her eyes slowly opened and her mouth curved into a seductive smile that almost had him changing all of his plans. “That sounds lovely.”
“A good way to spend our Christmas day?”
She gave him another one of her smiles, the one that meant she was genuinely happy. “That’s an excellent way to spend Christmas day,” she said as she pulled her foot from his lap and leaned in close
for a kiss.
The hike around the lake took up a good couple of hours of the day. The snowshoes helped a lot, but it was a pretty strenuous trek through all of that heavy snow. More of it had melted the day before and it was down to just over a foot that morning.
Katie came with them, wearing a red and green polka dotted sweater that kept her nice and warm with all of the snow. She got tired about halfway through, so Jace picked her up and carried her in his arms for part of it.
It wasn’t a bad arm workout, either, but it was definitely different from his usual routine. When he was doing reps, his weights didn’t lick him in the face every few minutes. Nor did they breathe warm dog breath down his neck.
By the time they got back to the cabin, he and Adele had both worked up a bit of an appetite, so they had a light lunch, before taking a nap on the sofa. The Christmas tree was lit up, there was a cozy fire burning, and holiday music played in the background. They dozed in each other’s arms for a good hour, and they weren’t the only ones napping either. Katie had curled up in her blankets when they’d gotten back to the cabin, and hadn’t moved.
Sounded about right.
When Jace and Adele finally roused from the sofa, they prepped everything for dinner: roasted chicken with rosemary and garlic (which was stuck in the oven to start baking), green bean casserole (Jace’s request, and his responsibility to make), and sweet potato casserole that would be topped with browned mini marshmallows when all was said and done.
Since Jace had turned the hot tub on to heat up before their hike, it was good and ready for them to get in. Once they finished up in the kitchen, they went to their respective rooms to change. Jace finished up first, tossing his robe onto the sofa before he headed for the kitchen. They might as well enjoy a Christmas-inspired drink while they hot-tubbed.
As Adele was the kind of cook who loved fresh herbs, there was a pretty decent amount of mint in the refrigerator. Jace grabbed that and a lime before moving to the bar. After muddling the mint leaves, lime, and some sugar, he added prosecco, cranberry juice, and vodka. He was just sugaring the rims when he heard her voice.
“Whatcha’ making?”
Jace looked up to see her coming out of the hallway, her hair now piled on top of her head in a messy bun and wearing a white, terry clothe bathrobe and thick, green socks.
“A Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer.”
“Sounds festive.”
“Hopefully it tastes festive. I just made it up.” He poured the glasses almost to the top before he held out one of the drinks to her.
“Cheers!” they said in unison as they clinked their glasses together. They both went to take a drink but Jace hesitated, more than a little distracted when Adele’s tongue darted out and she licked the rim of her glass before taking a sip
“Mmmmm,” she hummed. “That tastes really good.”
Mouth suddenly dry, he tipped his own glass back and took a fairly healthy sip. Tart and sweet. Two adjectives that described something else Jace liked to have on his tongue. Taking the glass from Adele’s hand, he set both on the counter of the bar. Then he reached out, grabbing onto her hips and pulling her against him.
Hand at the back of her head, he slanted his mouth over hers. It was one of those long, deep kisses that he loved so damn much. Her hands were on his bare chest, palms moving over his overheated skin.
“You taste even better.” Moving his hand from her hip to her belly, he pulled at the ties of her robe. “So what’s going on under here?” He asked as he pulled the two halves apart, looking down the length of her body.
Adele was wearing an itty-bitty, bright red bikini. It was just four triangles and string.
Annnnnnd his mouth was dry again.
Letting go of her robe, he put his hands on her bare hips, tracing his fingers over the top of her bathing suit bottom. He played with the strings at her sides, sliding his fingers beneath the material and moving them back and forth.
“You’re so damn sexy, I can’t think straight.”
“Thinking is overrated.” Adele’s hands were still flat on Jace’s chest and she slid them up and around his neck. She barely started to pull him down to her when he moved for her mouth again.
Before he knew it, both of his hands were on her bottom, pulling her right up against him. Adele indulged him with kisses for only a little bit longer before she let go of his neck, moving her hands to his arms and disentangling herself from him.
“I wasn’t finished.” He made to grab onto her again, but she took a step back.
“Oh, I’m completely and entirely aware, but let’s go finish out there.” She nodded to the hot tub before she retied her robe, grabbed her drink from the counter, and sauntered to the French doors that lead to the back patio.
Jace grabbed his drink as he followed behind her. She didn’t have to tell him twice.
One second they were outside getting all steamy—in more ways than one—in the hot tub and the next they were eating dinner. Then faster than he could blink, they were on the sofa again and about to watch White Christmas.
“This is my favorite Christmas movie,” Adele told him as they snuggled down beneath the covers. “I’d watch it over and over and over again when I was little. I loved the costumes and Bing Crosby.”
“Ahhhh, so you’ve got a thing for older men, do you?”
“No.”
“Then what is your type?” He asked as he leaned in close, nuzzling her neck. “Tall, blond and handsome?”
She hesitated for just a second before she cleared her throat. “I’ve always had a thing for shorter guys with glasses, dark hair, and maybe just a little bit nerdy.”
“Oh really?” He squeezed her side where he’d recently discovered she was super ticklish.
“Jace!” She squealed, writhing against him. The movement caused her ass to rub up against his groin, the very last thing he needed if they were going to watch this movie, so he stopped.
Pulling back a little he made enough space for her to role to her back so he could look down into her face. “Is that really your type?” He narrowed his eyes, lips twitching at the corners.
“Hand to God, in middle and high school, it one hundred percent was. My favorite books growing up were Harry Potter and Lord of the Rings. So I totally had a thing for Daniel Radcliffe and Elijah Wood because of the movies.”
“The hobbit and the wizard?” he asked, completely incredulous. “Seriously?”
“Yup.” She reached up, placing her palm on his cheek. “I’ve always been a sucker for pretty eyes.” Her thumb started to move back and forth, rasping over his stubble. “But over the years, I acquired an appreciation for a good beard.”
He was never shaving again.
“Now,” Adele patted his cheek before she rolled to her side again, “a little less talking and a lot more watching.”
She grabbed the remote from the coffee table and hit play while Jace settled in behind her, grinning like an idiot.
Chapter Thirteen
Boxing Day Bluessss
December 26th
It was after midnight when they left the living room and headed for the bedroom. Jace stripped Adele bare before he laid her out on the bed and made her lose her damn mind. That had been over three hours ago.
Adele had never been one to fight sleep, but she fought like crazy that night. She was beyond desperate to stay awake, to not miss a moment of her favorite holiday, to not miss a moment of her favorite Christmas…a Christmas spent entirely with Jace.
It was another night where they were curled up on their sides, his front to her back. She liked him at her back, liked being wrapped up in his arms, his mouth at her shoulder, his breath on her skin, their legs tangled together.
She liked him there with her…liked him being only hers. Except he wasn’t hers, a fact she had to keep reminding herself of. She got this time with him. Nothing more. And that was why she fought so hard to not fall asleep. She didn’t want to miss a moment with the man she loved. With
the man she was in love with.
Yup, she was in love with him. There was no denying it. Not anymore. She’d been lying to herself for who knew how long. Days? Months? Years? But now she knew the truth, and it hurt beyond words.
This time the ache in her chest was too much to handle, maybe because her heart was cracking in two. It took everything in her to gently disentangle herself from Jace and keep herself in check. But the second she was across the house in her own bathroom, with two doors firmly shut between them, she let herself go over to the pain, let her heart fully break.
She sat on the bathroom floor, the piled mat beneath her legs doing absolutely nothing to stop the cold from seeping into her body. The sobs were body-wracking and she had to stifle them with the back of her hand.
So this was what it felt like, to truly love someone but not be loved back. It was a physical, almost debilitating pain. She didn’t want it. She didn’t want someone to have this much power over her, the power to break her. Well, it was too late for that. Way too late.
The real kicker was she couldn’t even be mad at Jace. He hadn’t done anything wrong. She’d been the stupid one to go and fall in love with him. So much for not letting herself get in too deep.
A bitter laugh escaped her lips, interrupting her body-wracking sobs. Let herself? That question implied she had control in what had happened. That was a joke. She had absolutely no control. All control had gone straight out the window the second she’d pulled into that driveway and seen his car parked in front of the cabin.
Grabbing the robe that hung on the door next to her, she wrapped it around herself. The chill in the air was making her entire body shake. Wrapping her arms around herself, she closed her eyes as she took a couple of slow, deep breaths. She was wearing another one of Jace’s T-shirts and all she could smell was him.
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