“I don’t know, man. That thought briefly crossed my mind, but I’m not sure. They seem close, almost too close, ya know? Like they know know each other.”
“What, is Logical Hudson taking the day off or some shit?” Gaige asks.
“Logical Hudson was the one that thought of the family thing, for your information, but then, ya know, No-Bullshit Hudson chimed in. Fucker wins every time.”
“Amen. I’ve met the dude. He’s kind of a dick,” Tucker comments.
“All right, so, exes? Close friends? What?” I ask.
“Close friends.”
“I’m still going with family.”
“Exes,” I say.
“Well, that’s settled then,” Tucker snarks. “I mean, why don’t you just ask her?”
I think on it and eventually shrug. “I don’t feel like I have that right yet. We’re just getting to know one another. I haven’t even told her about Joey yet. It’s all too new and I don’t want to come off as a possessive jerk, or whatever you want to call it.”
“From the five minutes she spent over here earlier, I don’t think Rae would take it that way at all,” Gaige offers.
“I don’t think I can take that chance just yet. I like her too much.”
At the same time, we all take a drink of our sodas, taking a moment to process everything.
“How’s Joey doing? We gonna have a movie night soon?”
“I think you’re way too excited to watch old Disney movies with a seven-year-old,” Gaige says to Tucker. He turns back to me. “But really, when’s the next movie night?”
I love that they love Joey almost as much as I do.
“Joey’s great. Probably a little peeved since I’ve spent the last two nights away from Mom’s, but we’ll just have to do movie night soon to make up for it. Next Saturday or Sunday?”
They look to one another. “Sunday,” they say at the same time.
“Sunday it is. My apartment or Mom’s?”
“Mom’s,” they answer, again at the same time.
“I can grab some pizza if you want so Mom doesn’t have to cook dinner,” Gaige offers.
“You just want her to make extra desserts.”
“Can you blame the dude? Your mom makes the best fucking cherry pie ever. You were a lucky little shit growing up,” Tucker says.
“True. You two need to watch your mouths this time. There were two weeks of Joey saying ‘shit’ and ‘asshole’ after the last movie night.” Both the jerks snicker. “Oh, you think that shit is funny? You do realize that every time I said ‘Joey, don’t say shit!’ or ‘Joey, don’t say asshole!’ that kid made me pay fifty cents to the cuss jar? You know how expensive that got? You both owe me at least five bucks!”
At this point in my rant, they’re both laughing so hard, neither one of them is making a sound.
“I think… I think…” Tucker starts, gasping for air and holding his stomach.
“Oh yeah? I think, I think you’re both dicks,” I mock grumpily.
“I think that just made me love that kid even more. Genius!”
I just shake my head, because he’s right. My kid is damn smart for a seven-year-old.
“All right, all right,” Perry says, sitting back down at the table. “What’d I miss?”
“Looks like we’re buying dinner. Hudson’s broke,” Gaige supplies.
Perry laughs politely while Tucker and Gaige are back to their hysterics. I roll my eyes and turn my attention to the rest of the bar as Rae comes out of the back carrying a huge tray stacked full of food.
I don’t pay much attention to anything she says as she passes the plates out because I’m too busy watching her. She moves like she’s…air—which sounds weird as shit, but I don’t know how else to describe it. It’s fluid and flawless and smooth. She breezes when she walks, her steps light and quick, yet steady and calculated.
Then, something happens. Something so stupid and small and unimportant that there’s no reason my chest should be constricting, my breaths seizing, my entire world stopping.
She brushes against my arm, and I feel her everywhere.
Our eyes connect, and I’m hit with the same thing I have been hit with over and over when it comes to Rae: familiarity.
I don’t understand it either. I’ve never met her before, because trust me, I’d remember. With the way my body and mind react when I’m around her, there’s no way in hell I’d ever be able to forget.
And I damn sure wouldn’t want to, not with the way she’s looking at me right now as if I’m the only thing that matters.
It should feel wrong, because it’s way too soon for feelings between us. We’ve only recently met, don’t really know one another, so why are we so engrossed? Why can’t we look away? Why do we have this magnetism between? And why do I want to say to hell with all the rules and put my heart out there right this minute?
Because of the way she looks at me. Because of the way she makes my heart race. Because of…her.
She’s all I can see, and I’m perfectly okay with that.
WHACK!
“Fuck me, Tuck! That—”
“Nah, I’ll pass.”
“—hurt, you asshole.” I rub arm where he just slammed his stupid meaty fist into me and glare. I use all my energy to focus in on not flipping the asshole off, because even though he completely deserves it, I am somewhat of a gentleman.
I turn back to Rae just in time to see her scurry off like she’s sprinting in the Olympics or some shit.
Now I do flip Tucker off.
“I see you,” he says, grinning.
“I see you, too.”
Feeling his eyes on me, I glance over at Perry. I’m assuming he witnessed the…exchange between Rae and me because he’s staring at me, and I can’t tell if it’s a friendly stare or a back away while you still can stare.
Then, the shadows that were laced in his eyes disappear and I swear I watch a small amount of weight lift off his shoulders because he’s suddenly sitting straighter. He nods twice then turns his attention to his food, ending whatever the fuck just happened.
I peek over at Tucker because I have no clue what that was all about. He shrugs and takes a sip of his soda, leaving me to try to decipher that all on my own.
But, I’m confused. I have no idea if I just received some sort of warning for retribution later for the staring contest with Rae, or if it was permission.
I’ll hope for the latter and prepare for the former.
16
Rae
My body is still on fire from the point-two seconds I spent touching Hudson. I can feel him on me still, like his hands are all over me, touching me in the most intimate of places. I’m pulsating with excitement.
Which is utterly ridiculous considering all I did was brush up against his arm.
“Did he…” Maura starts from beside me.
“He did,” I manage around a loud gulp, trying to calm my rapid breaths.
I just witnessed my best friend, my cousin, my protector of all protectors other than my dad, give his approval to the guy I’m kind of going crazy over.
“Y’all are so gonna get married,” Benny says from my other side.
“Shut it, Ben.”
He holds his hands up in innocence. “Hey, I just call ’em like I see ’em.”
Maura makes a surprised noise. “I’ve never seen Perry be so…accepting so quickly. It’s…”
“It is.”
Benny’s warm hand falls on my shoulder as he says, “Good luck, kiddo. I think you’re gonna need it.”
Gee, thanks for all the help, bud.
“You’re welcome,” he calls over his shoulder.
“Let’s not think too much into all this,” I say to Maura with false bravado. Her brows furrow because she knows me better than to believe I’m not freaking out over this. Luckily, she ignores it…for now.
“So, where’s Tanner tonight? Isn’t he usually with the guys?” I ask, changing the subject.
&nb
sp; I swear to all things holy, Maura melts at the mention of his name.
“He’s meeting up with a buddy that just got home from deployment. Guess he’s having some trouble adjusting and has some family around this area so Tanner’s visiting him.”
“That’s cool of him.” He scores some major good guy points in my book for that.
“Yeah, they were really good friends growing up and ended up joining different branches. Kind of neat if you ask me. Sucks the guy is having such a hard time after deployment. I can’t imagine.”
“Has Tanner ever been deployed?”
“He did a nine-month tour in Germany, but wasn’t in a combat zone or anything. I’d probably worry myself sick if that happened now. I feel terrible for Tucker, knowing his brother could be deployed at any time.”
I shrug. “That’s the military, Maura. Deployment happens. It’s not always a bad thing, though.”
“I know, I know, I just…can’t wrap my head around it. Brave. They are all brave—Tucker and his family included.”
“Word,” I tell her.
“All right, I need to go refill drinks, and I know you, so go take your minute out back to have your freak out. I’ll cover your tables for you if I need to.” She pats my arm and walks off.
I take my cue and head toward the kitchen, making my way out to the alley. Funny enough, it’s not even an alley. It’s just a small, enclosed space around back. It’s usually used as a smoke break area for Benny, Cookin’ Curt, and Clyde himself, but a few people on the wait staff use it too cool down when things become hectic on the floor.
I push through the door, letting it close behind me, and walk over to the tall brown fence on the opposite side. I lean my back against it and press my palms flat to the surface. Closing my eyes, I take a long, deep breath and simply stand there. I take a few seconds to just breathe, absorbing my surroundings. I get a chance to listen to the crickets, a sound I find soothing, because Clyde has this place locked down when it comes to sound leaking outside. Everything is contained inside when the doors are closed, giving us an illusion of peace out back.
It’s a weird feeling when you find someone who makes you suddenly feel all these crazy things at once. You’re excited, overjoyed, overwhelmed, and nervous as hell all in one.
There are billions of people in this world and you find the one person who jumbles you up inside like this. You find them and you freak out over them and then you find this inner calm you’ve been searching for all your life and you realize you only have that because of that person.
Then you freak out some more.
And then you step outside of a burger joint and try to get your shit together and pretend you don’t smell the dumpster that desperately needs to be rolled away.
Can I do this? Can I let Hudson in? I’m scared in a way I never have been before. Letting him in would mean dates, which I can do. Kissing, which I can do. It would mean family, which I can probably do, but there’s a chance they would scare him away—I’ve met them, I should know.
But then there’s the whole talking about things, not skating around truths, and being entirely open with someone. You relinquish control over yourself, your emotions, when you let someone in, and that’s what scares me the most.
For the most part, I’ve felt like I had a good grip on my life. Then I graduated college and I felt lost. Then I felt okay. Then I met Hudson and confused as hell again.
I was so sure I had talked myself into it, that I was ready to leave this town, to get a big girl job in the city. Then Hudson told me it was okay to feel like I don’t have to do those things, told me I could stay here forever and still have all those things.
He makes me feel…worthy. Full. I feel like he knows something about me that’s hidden deep within and he pulls at that. He helps center me.
It’s all I have right now, and I’m going to cling to it while I can.
My concentration is broken when Clarissa comes barreling through the door on her cell phone, screeching at someone. I feel sorry for the poor bastard on the other end. She gives me a glare and rolls her eyes like I’m intruding on her space or some shit.
Guess break time is over. I push off the wall and head back inside.
I scan the dining area as soon as I walk through the hall. Everyone seems good, so I hit the bar to see if Benny needs me to run drinks for him.
“You okay, little one?” he asks, giving me a look that tells me he knows I just had a minor freak out.
I give him a thumbs-up. “Need me to run any drinks?” He nods, sliding a glass filled with thick dark liquid my way. “Guinness? Gross,” I shudder.
He laughs. “Just run it to table twelve. You don’t have to drink it.”
“I’m gonna at least plug my nose. This shit stinks.”
Benny just shakes his head at me. I grab the drink and am ready to head onto the floor guns blazing when I come face to face with Hudson.
Being the smartass I am, I hook my thumb over my shoulder in the direction of the restrooms. “You already forget? Bathroom is that way. Or did you need me to wait five minutes while you muster up the courage to ask me?” I smirk at him.
He folds his arms over his chest. “Goddamn do you have a smart mouth or what? I love it.”
You’re welcome.
“I didn’t say thank you, but now I feel like I should have.”
I mentally slap myself in the bed. Of course I said that out loud.
“So, I was wondering…” he starts.
“Wonder away, stud.”
His lips twitch at my interruption. “Can I give you a ride home? Or would that be weird?”
He’s in luck because I caught a ride with Haley tonight. She was going out with some moms from daycare and wanted an early out in case they all “sucked more than a vacuum.” Yeah, those were her exact words.
“I guess,” I tease.
“Wow. Don’t sound too excited about it or anything.”
And now he’s played with fire…
“Oh, Hudson, of course you can drive me home! You are just soooo sweet!” I yell at the top of my lungs. We get some stares, but most of the patrons know me well enough to ignore me.
He throws his head back in loud laughter. Benny looks to me, his eyebrow quirked up in question. I lift a shoulder in a What can you do? sort of way.
“That fuckin’ mouth,” I hear Hudson mumble in an amused voice as he walks away.
“Poor guy. He has no clue what he’s getting into with you,” Jaret, Benny’s partner, says from his perch at the bar.
“Nope, and I don’t really have it in me to feel bad for the guy.” I smirk, grabbing the beer once again and walking out onto the floor.
After I drop off the beer for Benny, I pull my phone out to text Haley.
Me: You’re off the hook. Found a ride home.
She responds immediately.
Hales: You so suck, dude. These women are boring! I just want to take my e-reader out and read. Is that bad? Ya know what? Fuck it. I’m gonna read on my phone and pretend I’m texting.
Hales: Wait…who’s taking you home?
Shit. I knew that was coming.
Me: Hudson…
Hales: Just wrap that shit, sis. Love you! Be careful!
And for some reason, people trust her with their children. That’s terrifying.
Me: Love you too! Enjoy your book!
Hales: OMG, SHUT UP! I’M READING! RUDE!
Pocketing my phone, I roll my eyes. She’s such a dork sometimes.
The next thirty minutes fly by as I make my way around the bar to check in on all my tables. I know I need to go check on Hudson’s table, but I’m nervous. He makes me that way. Being near him gives me weird jitters.
Okay, fine, I’m also procrastinating because they’re one of my last tables and that means I’m one step closer to being in a small, enclosed space with him alone.
But…my bed is calling my name, so it’s time to put my big girl panties on.
“Ah, there’s m
y girl,” Perry says, pulling lightly on my ponytail. I smack his hand away as I slide up close next to him, pushing him until he’s only halfway on his chair, and then sit beside him.
Resting my elbows on the table, I blow out a tired puff of air. “Are you dudes done yet? I’m ready to get out of here and you’re holding me up.”
“Shit, really? I didn’t realize we were your last table,” Gaige says as politely as one can while still using the word shit.
“No, I still have two other tables, but I can pass those off on Maura and bounce out early. This dude”—I point at Hudson—“wants to take me home. As you can see, he’s old, so he probably has a bedtime he has to stick to. You should all respect your elders and scoot scoot.”
“Did you just call me old?” Hudson asks in a shocked voice.
I nod solemnly. “I can totally see your gray hairs from here.” Not true. He doesn’t have a single gray hair on his head. Not a wrinkle or any sign of aging. He looks young and happy…and handsome as hell.
He scoffs. “I’m only twenty-four!”
“Must be your air of maturity.” That isn’t a lie; there is something about him that makes him seems older, more mature, like he had to grow up fast or something.
“Hudson, I think I love your girl. She gives you as much shit as I do,” Tucker says with admiration in his voice.
I throw him a wink. “I told you dudes I’m a catch. You missed out big time, Tucker.”
“And she’s full of herself. I feel like you’re a female version of this weird Gaige/Hudson hybrid. It’s creepy…and kind of hot.”
“Don’t compare me to that asshole!” Gaige says defensively.
“Yeah, that’s rude as shit, man. I am way better-looking than him,” Hudson says.
I blink rapidly. “You guys are exhausting.” And so damn entertaining, but I’m not stroking egos tonight, so I leave that part out. “All right, unless you boys need anything else, I’m going to go check on my other tables. But really, let’s pack this shit up, huh? We have a senior citizen we need to take care of.”
Here's To Box Set (Complete Series) Page 14
