by Jay Aspen
‘I’ll think about it. Meanwhile you both need to get stronger. I’ll put you directly in touch with Beau at the hive for details of the building and likely access routes.’
‘Thanks Raine, I know we can do this––’
‘Then I’ll think about it again.’
36
It had taken the islanders all day to cross the jetstream and reach the southern edge of the mountains. Jac was sitting with Bel, perched on an outcropping of rocks looking south to the last outlines of the Lakeland fells disappearing into the evening mist. Fox and Kit walked over to compare handset images from the hawks.
Jac scanned the screens. ‘Still no change. Patrols spreading far enough west of the road to stop us crossing the river where it’s just a series of small tributaries––where it would be easy. Fox, can all the islanders swim?’
He took back the device. ‘Less than half of them. It’s not exactly the kind of climate to make people take up swimming if they hadn’t already learned before they arrived.’
Bel frowned, staring into the mist shrouding the southern hills. ‘I guessed it might be like that. So we find a crossing downriver from the pass, before the river gets too big.’
‘What about Sam’s boat?’ Jac had been thinking about the lone survivalist as they got closer to the river.
Bel shook her head. ‘No. It’ll take too long and I don’t think we’d keep him calm enough to cope with all these people. Not without Fin.’
‘I’m going back for Sam,’ Jac insisted. ‘He can’t stay there on his own, not with all these patrols around. I think he’d found that acting like he was ‘mad’ protected him from too much interrogation, but it’ll probably have the opposite effect with staz patrols. They’ll just see him as target practice.’
Bel considered for a moment. ‘Sorry Jac, I can’t allow this. The islanders have to cross where its shallower and you can’t go back there on your own. Even half as erratic and unpredictable as he makes out, he still has a gun.’
Kit stood up. ‘I’ll go with Jac. We could leave now, collect Sam early tomorrow, and walk upriver till we meet you. It would save time, checking two sections of river at once for crossing points?’
Bel thought for a moment. ‘Hmm. It’s logical, although I still feel it’s risky, two people separating from the main group. But I guess it makes sense. All right, keep it simple and safe.’
‘I think––’
Kit’s answer was cut short by the arrival of four islanders, led by a stout middle-aged man with the weathered face of someone who had lived and hunted in the Ice Islands for some years. A well-maintained hunting rifle was slung over one shoulder. Jac remembered he called himself Bear. He had brought their furs on their first night at the outpost. He fidgeted awkwardly for a moment, glancing at his companions for encouragement.
‘Excuse us Miss Bel, but we’ll not be heading south in the morning. There’s nine of us been talking this evening and we want to get looking straight away for places to set up new holdings. Like, the original plan to settle in the northern forests. We’ve been up here a while. Reckon we’ve enough experience to figure out how to fix things even if it is a bit different south of the barrier.’
‘Why the hurry?’
He shuffled again. ‘Hungry families waiting for us to find farms. And, seems to me there’s a need for a few people to be around with spy-hawks for a day or two. Warn any refugees before they run into those patrols.’
Bel kept her response measured. ‘Bear, I’m not your commander. The three of us are just your guides, so I can’t order you to follow one path or another. Talk through the risks first.’
The hunter’s battered features broke into a broad grin, revealing a couple of broken teeth. ‘We hoped you’d be okay with it. Sure, we’ll go and think of all the terrible things that might ‘appen, then we’ll have a good laugh and go off to the northern forests anyway.’
Fox watched the group walk back to their camp. ‘Bear never takes anything too seriously. They’ll be all right. Best hunters in the islands. If anyone can make it in new territory they can.’
*
It was almost dark by the time Jac and Kit found a copse of rowans near a stream where they could sleep for the night without risk of being seen. They had walked for an hour from the main camp and planned to reach Sam’s river crossing early next morning.
Jac unrolled her blanket, still feeling awkward in Kit’s presence. She was grateful for his offer to help her collect Sam but she couldn’t help wishing someone else, anyone else, could have come with her instead. More than anything she felt unsettled and restless, angry with herself for the jealousy that had haunted her nights at Icehall––and the days she’d spent trying to avoid Kit, hoping to mute these disturbing feelings.
She curled up under her blanket and turned her back on him before he’d even started to unpack, hoping he’d think she was exhausted.
‘Jac. I know you’re not asleep.’
His voice was soft, close to her ear and she jumped visibly, still unused to the way rangers could approach so silently. It was pointless to go on pretending. She turned round and sat up, hugging her knees, eyeing him suspiciously over her folded arms as he knelt beside her on the grass.
More like it’s myself I don’t trust.
She could tell he was trying to figure out what to say to her. Part of her was searching for something to break the tension between them but she couldn’t think of anything that might work. When he finally spoke his suggestion was the last thing she expected.
‘Jac, I think the only way to deal with this is to try to connect again, but we can do it differently this time.’ He saw her eyes widen in alarm. ‘No, I mean really differently. You haven’t had the chance to learn deep communication the right way, with a whole group of people over several weeks. And with this crazy manhunt going on, it’s unlikely you’ll get the chance even when we’re back at the Warren.’
Another long silence. She felt too confused and awkward to know where to start. He tried again.
‘I don’t want to lose you––’
He broke off as she inched away, even more alarmed. ‘I mean, lose you as a friend. And if we don’t sort it soon, I can see that happening.’
He looked so dejected her medic instincts took over, searching for something to ease the pain. ‘All right. Try to explain what you want to do.’ She saw the relief on his face.
‘I’m using a bit of guesswork here, but you have incredible clarity with lieth communication. Most of us can’t do that, even after years of practice. I thought maybe we could use it to take you through my experiences in group training––seeing as you probably won’t have a chance to experience it yourself, at least not for a while.’
Jac thought about it for a few moments. ‘First, tell me what it’s like with the other rangers. Fin told me most people are more limited than I am, but I actually have no idea what she meant.’
He settled himself next to her, his back against the tree.
‘One example would be, if we’re working out how to capture a bunch of paramilitaries before they attack an outlander homestead, we can use deep communication to make the discussions and the planning clearer––fewer misunderstandings. Once we separate and start moving, all most of us can pick up are very basic instinctive-emotional messages like direction, threat, all-clear. We get a bit more detail if there’s eye contact, when we can use the hand and eye signals we all learn in training.’
‘Oh.’ Jac felt even more confused. ‘Even after Fin explained it I assumed it was more like... not needing phones anymore.’
‘And put Karim out of a job?’
They both laughed, breaking the tension a little. Kit tried to explain.
‘Most people have experiences of thinking they’ll call someone, and they go to pick up their handset and it buzzes––and it’s that person suddenly calling them. Even at some distance, even with someone they don’t call very often. Far more than just coincidence. And we tried over and over to
develop that, but soon as you put conscious control on it, the intuitive connection somehow disappears. It’s too unreliable.’
‘So?’
‘So I guess Karim’s job is pretty safe. At least for a while. We’ve only been able to consciously connect with a lot of practice, close contact, and deep trust. Both people open to it, as in a spoken conversation. There’s a few who can do more...’
He remembered something and broke off. She knew why immediately.
‘Fin.’
‘Yeah. We’re all going to miss her in so many ways.’
‘Please, I’m trying not to think about it till we’re safely back at the Warren. It’s too painful. Let’s get on with this. Can you communicate better with someone you’re close to?’
‘Of course. Physical contact, knowing someone really well––but it’s still mostly at an emotional, intuitive level. Nothing like the clarity you have.’
‘So, sharing your training experiences with someone like me... it’ll be like letting me read your mind, your innermost thoughts. Do you really want to do this?’
He looked away. ‘I’ll be honest. It scares the hell out of me. But we got into this because you were trying to save my life. I feel I have to give it a go.’
Jac gave an almost inaudible sigh of resignation and held out her hands, eyes closed in concentration. As soon as he touched her, she pulled away again.
‘There’s something you don’t want to show me. You’re holding back.’
His eyebrows registered surprise. ‘Impressive. How do you do it?’
Jac almost smiled. ‘It would have been an obvious guess. I’d be amazed if you weren’t. But I felt it as a powerful blocking sensation. You’ll have to figure out how to filter.’
He concentrated for a few moments and then gave up.
‘No, I can’t do it. I don’t know how. Not with you. I’ll just tell you.’ He waited for her to acknowledge. ‘It was early this morning. Bel and I were sharing a nest of branches and furs on the edge of the camp...’
Jac looked away, fighting the feelings of jealousy the information sparked. Kit noticed but didn’t comment, simply waiting a few moments for her permission to continue.
‘Kit, go on. It’s fine.’
‘Bel was in the middle of her nightmare again and I picked up on it. She woke up, saw straight away how badly it was affecting me and broke the mind-connection. To protect me. I wish I could help her through this, but I guess the reason I can’t is because I’m too close to it myself. That pain is still there. I didn’t want to inflict it on you.’ He hesitated, frowning. ‘This is more complicated than I thought.’
Jac gave an exasperated sigh. ‘No it’s not. You’re getting more protective than Raine. Let me do the healing thing first, then you can take me through the training sequence straight away. Like, really straight away before I––you know.’
He smiled. ‘Get carried away?’
‘Hmph. Doesn’t it affect you like that?’
‘Of course. But when I’ve taken you through the sequence I think you’ll understand.’ He moved closer, one arm around her shoulders. Jac reached for his hands again, closed her eyes and moved her focus into him.
The images from the dream were unclear and dissonant but the emotional shock was harsh and violent. Jac broke away, frantically stifling a cry of horror, staring at her hands, expecting to see the knife and the blood––
‘Oh chaos––Jac! I’m sorry. I should have guessed it would hit you like that.’ Kit held her close, trying to comfort and reassure as she gasped for breath.
After a few moments she managed to regain focus and calm the pounding of her heart. ‘It’s okay. I’ll be ready for it this time.’ She hunched her shoulders defensively. ‘The things you people have to deal with...’
She opened her awareness again, this time ensuring the comforting images of her farm and its people flowed back into him. After a few moments she could feel the dark shadows of the dream memory fading into the warm-honey sensation of sunshine and comfort she always felt when thinking of her adopted family.
His hands closed tighter on hers and she felt him breathing deeper, his breath warm against her neck. This time she could sense the powerful physical attraction also affecting him, sensed it was even stronger than the waves of desire already washing through her body. His thoughts finally managed to struggle through her confusion.
Relax. Let me take over.
She tried to comply but it was a few moments before she had the confidence to let go, as if keeping up the mental pressure would be the only thing that could stop the overwhelming allure controlling her completely. And then the world shifted and changed, and although the images were vague at first, she knew she was back at the Warren.
Afterwards she found it impossible to tell how long she stayed there, sitting under the quiet evening trees, following his mind-images of training sessions that had lasted several weeks in real time. Slowly, the patterns and relationships began to take shape and form, thousands of tiny connections, tenuous threads built on trust and practice. Some of the encounters became too powerful to control and she sensed his hesitation in admitting to a few rather wild intimate adventures.
Kit? You sure about this?
Keep going. I can handle it if you can.
And then, slowly, the understanding seemed to come. The heightened aliveness that came from deep communication began to spread evenly throughout the group, enabling the easy understanding that meant the difference between life and death in the missions that waited for them in the unseen future.
Kit had started spending more time with Bel, finally able to discriminate between the bond established with his training group and something different, deeper and more intimately powerful. Jac finally understood these were her own feelings for Raine.
Kit? Do you want to stop now?
If you feel you’ve learned enough.
She eased the connection until it was less intense and leaned back against him with a sigh. She felt exhausted, almost as if she’d physically been through those demanding training workouts.
‘Thank you. That can’t have been easy for you.’
He hesitated before answering. ‘It’s strange––the whole group was sharing those experiences in the first chaotic weeks, but it was harder than I thought to consciously show you everything compressed together like that.’ He squeezed her arm. ‘You okay? I can feel how tired you are from the healing.’
‘I’ll be fine. Soon as I calm down a bit I’ll just sleep for a week.’
‘So long as you postpone it till we’re back at the Warren.’
‘Sure.’ She hesitated. ‘Is it too personal to ask how you and Greg managed such a complex relationship with Bel? It still feels like a piece of confusion left over.’
Kit laughed. ‘Considering what we’ve just been through...’ He settled himself against the tree, making sure she was comfortable and she sensed him focusing on how to translate complex feelings into words.
‘It’s like... I didn’t know at first that Bel was in a relationship with Greg. Had been for ages. But it was so off and on because of her fear of losing someone close. After losing her parents I suppose. And then when I did find out, Greg saw me moping about, totally in love with someone who was meant to be with him, and I couldn’t say anything...’
Jac could remember a few outlander situations that had been similar. ‘Sounds like a recipe for a massive fight.’
‘Probably. But Greg was somehow able to go beyond all that jealousy stuff. He just said there might be a way to make things work for all three of us. He dragged me over to where Bel was waiting to meet him, told her he was busy, he’d see her next day, and I was available to replace him on the swimming date they’d arranged. And then he just walked off and left me there staring at her, completely unable to say a word!’
They both laughed. The connection was still partly there, enough for Jac to pick up his recollection of those awkward moments of speechless embarrassment.
‘And it worked, just like that?’
‘She guessed immediately why he’d done it. He thought it might reassure her enough to get over the way she’d run like a scalded cat every time things got too intense. So I went swimming with Bel and we thought about it, talked about it. And then she met him the following day and talked it through a bit more. And yes, it worked, as much as any relationship has its ups and downs.
‘I think the way we have to live right now with the constant danger, it makes a difference. Never knowing if each day might be your last. No one plans too far ahead because it feels like it’s tempting fate. We teamed up together on patrols as much as we could, the three of us watching each other’s backs. The heightened communication we had kept us safer than when we were with anyone else.’
‘And then you adopted Karim?’
He grinned. ‘Team decision. No other way to keep a sixteen year old genius idiot out of trouble.’
Jac shivered. ‘I hope he’s all right. The look on his face when we left him with only Luc as bodyguard...’
‘Luc’s one of the best fighters we have.’
‘Luc had serious burns on his arm.’ She stopped herself. ‘I know. Pointless to waste energy worrying.’
‘We’ll catch up with everyone when we get back to the Warren. Right now it’s time for the first instalment of your weeks’ sleep.’
But it was a while before Jac could sleep, so many new revelations trying to settle in her mind. She lay awake, watching shifting folds of colour dance across the night sky, knowing this would be her last glimpse of the northern lights for a long time.
37
Jac and Kit moved on at first light, retracing their route back to the bend in the river where they had crossed in Sam’s boat. There was no sign of Sam on the far bank, or of the boat beached on the shingle.
‘Wait here. I’ll swim across and bring the boat back.’ Kit started to take off his jacket. Jac stepped between him and the water’s edge.
