by D. Kelly
“You’d never cheat, Jordan. You aren’t him, so get that out of your head right now.”
That’s one thing I love about Tyler—he knows when I go to that dark place in my mind.
“No, but what if we ended up divorced?”
“Shh, it doesn’t matter. We can’t play the what if game. It’s not fair to either of us. All we can do now is figure out how to move forward. Do you think we can still be friends? Would Allie let that happen?”
A vision of Allie’s smiling face pops into my mind. “I think she’d be okay with it. She feels awful, you know. She considers herself the other woman.”
Tyler laughs. “At this point, I think I’m the other man. She’s a good one, J. If you were going to leave me for a woman, you picked well. I’d really like us to still be friends. I don’t think I can handle losing any more family right now.”
Tyler lays his head in my lap, and I thread my fingers through his hair as we sit together in silence. The next thing I know, I wake up at four in the morning.
Shit!
“Damn, J, what time is it?” Tyler yawns as he sits up.
“Four in the morning. Allie was supposed to be here an hour ago.”
“Oh shit,” Ty says as I look at my phone. There are no missed messages or calls. That’s probably a good thing.
I text Sasha first so I can figure out my next move.
Is Allie there?
Tyler downs the rest of his water as I wait for a text back.
Sasha: Yes, and you’re in a world of shit.
“Fuck! Allie must have come here and left. I’ve got to go, Tyler.”
As I put on my shoes, he eyes me carefully.
“Jordan, do you love her?”
Our eyes meet, and I hate myself for having to answer him, but he knows I won’t lie. “Yes.”
“Are you in love with her?”
I close my eyes and then open them. “Yes. Deeply.”
He blinks rapidly. “Then do me a favor. Tell her. Don’t lose her the way you lost me. Don’t make her wait ten years to hear the words only to leave her for someone else.”
As Tyler stands to leave, I reach for his hand. “Are you sure you want to be my friend after all of this? I’d understand if not.”
“We’ll always be friends, Jordan, but you may need to hook me up with Sawyer’s hot as fuck bodyguard. I’m going to need a good rebound fuck.”
We both laugh, but it’s actually not a bad idea. Mac’s an awesome dude. He’s affectionate, fun, protective—which Tyler would love—and unlike me, he has zero commitment issues.
“Consider it done. You’re a good fit for him, and fuck, Ty, the man has some incredible moves between the sheets.”
His mouth drops and he slugs my shoulder. “You hit that?”
“We had a don’t ask, don’t tell rule for the off months, remember?”
He shakes his head as we walk outside and I lock up behind me. “You’re unbelievable, Weston, and you definitely need to hook me up on a date. I’d say it’s the least you owe me.”
I pull Tyler in for a hug. “Consider it done. And Ty? Thanks for being you. Tonight wasn’t easy, but I’m not sure what I’d do if you didn’t want to be a part of my life anymore. Whoever ends up with you is going to be one lucky bastard.”
“Go get your girl, J. We’ll talk tomorrow.”
After Tyler drives off, the only thing on my mind is getting to Allie fast and hoping I didn’t screw everything up.
Tyler’s car is still in the driveway when I arrive at Jordan’s house. The living room light is on, and I sit in the car, weighing my options. I’m not sure what to do. Maybe their discussion got a bit heated and they’re still talking things through. Or maybe they’ve decided to get back together and are making up for all the time they lost.
The only thing I know for sure is that I’m not using my key and taking a chance on walking in on the latter. There’s no way I could handle seeing Jordan with anyone else. It’s just about three in the morning and I’m too tired to do anything but go home and figure it out tomorrow.
Sasha looks up at me from the couch where she’s doing her nails. “Hey, what are you doing here?”
I don’t know how she’s so wired when I’m about to fall asleep on my feet.
“When I got to Jordan’s, Tyler was still there.”
Her eyes narrow. “What did you do?”
“Nothing. I left and came home. I’m exhausted, Sasha, and the last thing I wanted to walk in on was some emotional break up or some incredible make-up sex between them.”
“Shit, Al, I’m sorry.”
“It’s fine,” I reply as I kick off my shoes. “What can I do? If he wants Tyler, maybe it’s better they figure it out now. I’m tired of feeling like I’ve come between the two of them anyway. I’m going to bed. See you in the morning.”
I haven’t been asleep long before I hear pounding on the door and muffled voices. I quickly dismiss it as one of Sasha’s late-night booty calls until my bedroom door opens and closes. I open my eyes as the shadow moves closer to me.
“It’s me, Allie. We need to talk.”
God, I knew it. They got back together.
“It’s fine, J. Go home and break up with me tomorrow. At least give me one last night of sleep before you toss my world into a tailspin.”
He laughs, and I’m pretty sure I hear his clothes hitting the floor. When he slides into bed with me and spoons me from behind, he’s definitely naked. Jordan brushes my hair aside and puts his lips to my ear. “I did not fuck Tyler, and we most definitely did not get back together.”
“Then what happened?” I blink back my tears, but I can’t help being emotional about this.
He snuggles in closer to me. “So much, and I’ll explain a lot of it tomorrow, but I broke up with him Allie, for good. You’re the only person I want to be with.”
“You want to be with me?”
“If you’ll still have me and if you still love me.” He presses his lips against my neck and traces the sensitive skin beneath my ear with this tongue. “Do you still love me, Allie?”
“You’re impossible not to love, Jordan. I was so scared and I didn’t know what to do. Should I go in and risk walking in on a vulnerable moment, or worse, the two of you together? It was the first time I was afraid to use the key you loaned me. I left … didn’t even get out of the car.”
He flips me around to face him and caresses my cheek. “Don’t ever be afraid to use your key. It’s yours, Allie, not a loaner. Can’t you see by now how much I need you in my life?”
“There are times I feel important to you and know that I’ve got your full focus and attention. But there are other times, especially when we’re working or when other people are around, when I feel like I’m just another notch on your bedpost.”
He moves his lips to mine and kisses me slowly. “I’m sorry,” he says when he pulls away. “You’ve never been a random fuck for me, Allie. I want to be crystal-clear about that. At work, I’m the boss, and it’s always been a big concern of yours about us being together. I feel like I watch you enough to be a serious creeper, but I try to stay away and keep my hands to myself. Yesterday, though, I couldn’t help touching you, and I’m not sure I’m going to be able to stop myself anymore. Is that going to be an issue?”
“As long as you don’t try to get me naked on the bar in front of people, I think we’ll be okay.”
Jordan kisses me again. “So the watcher doesn’t like to be watched?”
“Something like that,” I murmur against his lips.
“Good, because I don’t want anyone watching you either.”
“Jordan, I have to ask you something.”
“Shoot.”
“Please don’t laugh.”
He brushes my hair back from my face. “Never.”
“Sasha mentioned something about our lives being easier if we had a plural relationship with Tyler. And while I�
�m all for people doing what makes them happy, that’s not something you’re going to want later down the line, is it? Because that’s not—”
“That’s not you, and it’s not me either. Fucking Sasha. I think she’s a bit more daring in the romance department than I am. I’ve done the threesome thing. It can be fun for a few hours, but that’s about the extent of it for me.”
“Okay …” I reply hesitantly.
“Allie, what’s going on in your head right now? Do the threesomes bother you? Because I can’t make those go away, sweetheart.”
“No, it’s dumb. Don’t worry about it.”
Jordan rolls me to my back and lies on top of me, pinning me to the bed. He’s hard between my legs, and I moan my appreciation. “Tell me what’s bothering you.”
“You’re, uh, experienced, J. I’m pretty boring. I spent six years with a man who barely wanted sex. How do you know I’m going to be enough for you?”
He slides his hand down my body and into my pajama shorts and I arch against him. “Sweet Allie, we have incredible chemistry.” As if to punctuate his point, he dips a finger inside me, and I groan. “If there’s anything you want to learn, I’ll be the best teacher you’ve ever had.” Jordan works a second finger inside me, and my eyes flutter closed.
“Damn, Jordan …”
As he brings his lips to my neck and kisses me, I writhe beneath him. “My sweet, sweet Allie. You have to understand I don’t want to be with you because of sex.”
“No?” I gasp as he does wicked things to me with his hands and mouth.
“No. I want to be with only you from now on because you love me for me. You know my secrets and fears, and when those demons rise up from the dark recesses of my mind, you silence them with your gentleness and love.”
“Jordan … I’m going to … ahhh …”
His mouth meets mine, and he whispers against it, “Let go, Allie. Let me feel your love.”
My body detonates as he swallows my cries. Readjusting his position, he makes quick work of removing my shorts and panties.
“Fuck … please tell me you have condoms.”
“No, I don’t. You don’t have any?”
He climbs back up the bed and lies next to me. “Nope. I gave one of the bachelors the last one in my office and gave his friend the one from my wallet as I was leaving the bar. I was going to refill when I got home, but I was late and Ty was already there. It’s okay, though, there’s always tomorrow.” Jordan wraps his arm around my waist and tugs me close.
“I’m still on the pill, and I’m clean. I got tested when I left D.C. and again at my annual exam a few weeks ago to be safe. What about you?”
“I’m clean. I was tested a couple of months ago when we started having sex. I haven’t been with anyone but you, Allie.”
“Make love to me, Jordan.”
“Are you sure? I don’t want you to feel like I’m pushing you into this because I can wait.”
I lower my hand to his cock and groan when I feel how hard he is. “I can’t wait, J. I feel like tonight is a new beginning for us. I want to feel you inside me. All of you.”
“Fuck, Allie …” He crushes his mouth to mine, and we kiss as if our lives depend on it. If I had known leaving Evan would bring me to Jordan, I would have left him years ago.
Pulling away from me, he tugs off my shirt and drops his mouth to my breasts. He teases my nipples to stiff peaks before drawing them into his mouth. Clutching the sheet, my body bows into his.
“Jordan, please.”
He continues kissing his way down my body. “Keep begging, baby, it’s about to get better.”
Gripping my hips, he licks and sucks his way from my clit to my entrance, making the most primal sounds as he does. Spearing me with his tongue, it doesn’t take long before I explode. Jordan moans as if he’s in paradise.
Sliding up my body, he flashes me a sexy grin. I’m still trying to catch my breath. “Is it possible to die by orgasm?”
He chuckles and leans down, biting my neck. “Why don’t we find out?”
“Yes, fuck me, Jordan, please …”
He cups my cheek in his hand. “I thought you wanted me to make love to you?”
“As long as you’re inside me, you can do whatever you want. I need to feel you, J.”
He pushes into me and hisses. “Damn, Allie, you feel amazing.”
Wrapping my legs around his waist, I pull him flush to me.
Jordan grips the sheet and groans. “Wait, let me … you’re so fucking wet.”
He laces his fingers through mine and leans closer. Our mouths fuse together, and with every stroke of his tongue, Jordan moves deep within me. My chest heaves, leaving me nearly breathless as I’m consumed by my love for him.
“Allie, I don’t think I’m going to last much longer,” he whispers, and I pull him deeper.
“Come with me, J. I want to feel you lose control with me.”
He slips his free hand between us and circles my clit with his fingers. As I begin to feel that euphoric rush, he calls out my name. The husky tone of his voice and the sweetness of this moment set me off. The two of us climax together, and we stay connected long after we’ve finished.
“That was amazing.” His wondrous tone surprises me. As he lays on top of me, I play with his hair.
“Was that the first time you’ve ever done that?”
“Sex without a condom? Yeah …”
Oh wow. I just assumed he and Tyler had tossed the condoms a long time ago.
“Tyler and I were under no illusions in our relationship. When we were off, we were free to fuck whomever we wanted. Our relationship was one repetitive interlude, but I’m thankful for it because it led me to you, Allie.”
He pulls my hand to his mouth and kisses it before finally rolling off of me.
“I wish I would have listened to Sasha and come to live here years ago.”
“Noah believed in fate more than anything else. He’d say you were brought to me when the time was right and I needed you most. As usual, he’d be right. I’m ready for more in my life than just casual hookups and off-and-on relationships. I’m ready for everyone to know we’re exclusively dating.”
I tuck myself into the crook of his arm, and he rests his head on the top of mine. “I’d love that, Jordan. Almost as much as I love you.”
“Good, because I have a surprise for you tomorrow. First, we sleep.”
“You have a surprise for me? Why?” I love surprises, and I can’t remember the last time someone gave me one.
“All in due time, Allie. Now sleep. I know you’re tired.”
This morning, I wake up to Sasha’s laughter and an empty bed. After using the restroom and throwing my pajamas back on, I make my way into the living room.
“About time, sleepyhead. The two of you left me in desperate need of a cigarette last night.”
Sasha grins as my cheeks flush. I didn’t realize we were that loud.
“I’m sorry—”
“Don’t apologize to her, Allie,” Jordan says, cutting me off. “If you knew how many times I’ve had to listen to Sasha get off, you’d understand payback is nice to achieve, even if it wasn’t intentional.”
“Whatever. I’m just glad the two of you,” Sasha points between us, “have finally figured out your shit. Watching you go back and forth was exhausting. No offense to Tyler, but it was so obvious he wasn’t the one for you.”
“Sasha, that’s not nice,” I counter.
She brushes me off. “Maybe not, but it doesn’t make it any less true. I noticed the first day there was a spark in Jordan’s eyes when he talked to you that I’d never seen. Considering I’ve known him a little longer than Tyler, I knew it had to mean something.”
Jordan brings me a cup of coffee and wraps his arm around my waist after handing it to me. “She’s not wrong, Allie. But if we can all agree to stop talking about Tyler and me from here on out, that would be gre
at. He’s always going to be one of my best friends. We just weren’t meant to be.”
I make my way over to the couch, and Jordan follows. We didn’t talk about Tyler much last night. I need to process this new information.
“So you and Tyler are still going to be close?”
Sasha hops up from her chair. “I’m going to take a shower.”
Once she’s gone, Jordan turns my face to his. “Is that going to be a problem?”
“I’m not sure. Part of me understands it completely …”
“And the other part?”
“Wonders how you would feel if Evan showed up and we decided to be friends.”
Fury flashes in those gorgeous eyes of his before he leans in and kisses me breathless. “Evan treated you like shit, Allie, and I might kill him if he ever shows his face here. If anyone treated anyone badly, it was me treating Tyler that way. I would never do anything to hurt you, but before you take a friendship with Tyler off the table, can we see how it goes first? I’m with you, Allie, but …”
I scoot closer to him. “But what?”
“Tyler came out to his family. It didn’t go well. He did it because he said you gave him the courage to. We need to be his friends because we are going to be all he has for a while. I can’t abandon him, not now.”
“Wow, I didn’t think he’d actually take my advice. I was just telling him how much better I feel being out of that toxic situation. Of course, we’ll be there for him, or you should. I’m probably like salt in his wound right now.”
He kisses my head. “Maybe at first, but he’ll have to get used to you because I’m not letting you go anytime soon. Believe it or not, he asked me to hook him up with Mac. I think it’s a good idea. Why are you blushing, Allie? Should I be worried? Do you have a thing for Mac too?”
“Stop teasing me. Mac is sexy, sweet, and handsome. I can appreciate a good-looking man.”
“So can I,” he counters, his voice husky.
“Ugh, don’t remind me.”
“It might be fun, Allie. We could check out guys together. We’re allowed to look if we don’t touch.”
With wide eyes, I turn to him. “You’re fucking with me, right?”
