“You need to tell him.”
“I will just not right now. It’s complicated. You see he has a girlfriend, and I don’t want to cause any problems for him. I don’t want or need anything from him. It’s just ya know. Whatever,” the lies just keep coming.
“You poor dear.”
“I’ll be fine. Truly. I’m putting in applications, and I’m sure once I find a car and a babysitter, things will work out for me. I’m thinking of moving to another city even. Fresh start and all that.” I still have the bank card James gave me. I never touched that money. I could use it for Wylla and me. He is her father and he gave it to me.
I hope there is still money in the account anyway.
“Not to pry, but you aren’t prepared for this baby at all. It’s okay to ask for help. I know you’re strong. You don’t have to prove that to me. No one has to know. Not even James. It can be our secret. You didn’t get a baby shower. I want to do this for you. So let me see what you have.”
Heat shoots up my spine. She’s right. I didn’t think any of this through. I don’t have anything besides a few basic things. Not even a crib. A fat tear rolls down my cheek. “I...”
“You know what. It’s okay. You just kick back there on the couch. The baby is asleep in the carrier, and you should sleep when she does. I’ll prep a bottle or two before I leave. You’ve got enough diapers to cover you for now. Leave it all to me.”
It’s too much. I can’t allow her to do this and yet I have no one else. My mom was right. I’m lost. I don’t know what I’m doing or how to take care of a baby at all. A small sliver of my heart was holding onto hope I’d be doing all of this with James. Now look at me. I’m his wife’s fucking charity case.
Ruthie hums to herself moving through my apartment, changing things around, and making notes on a pad of paper she got from the junk drawer in the kitchen. I close my eyes and sleep sucks me under.
**
“Shh. They’re still asleep. Try to be a little quieter will you.”
I blink.
“Where should I put this?” a guy’s voice sounds close by.
“Take it to the bedroom,” Ruthie tells him.
“Got it.”
I open my eyes in time to see Tanner packing a big box toward my bedroom.
Holy shit. Why is he here? This is bad. Real bad. He can blow my secret out the water. I’m torn between trying to get rid of both of them or pretending I’m asleep a bit longer. Wylla Mae wakes up with a startled cry, and I instantly jump up. So much for faking my sleep.
“You want me to get her?” Ruthie offers, and I shake my head.
I glance around the room while I get Wylla from the carrier. “Ruthie...it’s too much.” There’s so much stuff.
“Nonsense. I only bought the essentials. I have a little surprise for you.” She motions toward the hall. “Figured you need a nudge in the right direction.”
I look over to see Tanner smiling sheepishly at me. Shit. “Hey, Alexa.” His cheeks redden when he says my name.
“Hi. Can you hold on a second? I just gotta.” I point to my baby’s stinky butt and move past him.
“I gotta get going, Alexa. I think you and Tanner have some talking to do. I’ll check back in on you, but if you need anything give me a call.”
“Okay. Thanks.” This is all too much and too damn strange.
“I’ll see myself out.” She waves and slips out the door.
I lay Wylla down on my bed realizing I forgot to bring her diapers and wipes with me. I can sense Tanner hovering over my shoulder. I can’t believe Ruthie did this. She had no business dragging him here. This has nothing to do with him.
“I don’t want to sound rude but what are you doing here? No hold that thought. First can you um grab me a pack of wipes and a diaper out of the living room?”
He scratches at the back of his neck. “Yeah. Sure.”
“Great. Thank you.”
I get her onesie unbuttoned by the time he returns. “Here you are.” He places the items next to her on the bed. “What the heck is that?” his face screws up, deep blue eyes widening.
“What?”
“Her bellybutton.”
“Oh. That’s from her umbilical cord. Um one more favor. I need an alcohol swab from my bag. It’s in the chair in the living room.”
“How about I just bring you the bag?”
“Good idea.” I still have no idea what he’s doing here. I change my baby’s diaper while he’s fetching the bag for me. “So what are you doing here?”
“Um. I don’t know for sure, but Rochelle’s mom called my mom and said she needed my help with something. She made me go shopping for baby stuff and had this weird conversation with me about responsibility and being a man. It made me super uncomfortable. I got the impression she thinks I’m the father of your baby, but I know that’s not possible so you wanna tell me what the hell is going on?”
“I’m so sorry for dragging you into my mess. It’s my fault. I hope she didn’t say anything to your mom.” I clean the umbilical cord and snap the onesie back.
“Not sure. But why does she think we slept together?”
I grit my teeth. He ought to have full transparency. “Because I may have told her that we had a one-night stand that resulted in my baby.”
“I like you, but my parents will kill me if they think I got you knocked up.”
“I’m sorry, Tanner.” I cradle Wylla Mae to my chest. “I don’t expect you to lie for me. It’s just...I can’t. People can’t know who the father is, and I had to tell her something. She was asking questions, and I didn’t have answers. If you mom asks questions, tell her it was a misunderstanding.”
“You’re beautiful,” he blurts out. He blushes and stares at his shoes. His head snaps back up. “What I mean is whoever or whatever they’re the one missing out. I’ve thought you were the prettiest girl in all of West Virginia since the fifth grade when my family first moved here. If people think that you...that we. Then I’m okay with that. I’ve been wanting a shot with you long as I can remember. You might not think of me that way, but maybe one day you will.”
“That’s sweet. Probably one of the nicest things anyone has ever said to me. I’m not looking for a boyfriend, but what I could really use tonight more than anything is a friend.”
He smiles at me. Tanner has one of them golden smiles. Perfectly sculpted lips and a chiseled jaw that’d cut glass. Any girl would be lucky to have him. Because sure he’s cute, but he’s sweet and kind. The kind of guy most parents would love for their daughter to bring home. The guy I shoulda been dating, but he’s not the one I love. My heart belongs to a royal bastard in every sense of the word. As hurt as I am, I still ache for James.
“How about we get this crib set up?”
“I’d like that. Thank you, Tanner.” I shift my baby girl to my other shoulder and kiss his cheek. I don’t know if I will ever open my heart to another man, but maybe one day.
Chapter Twenty-six
“What’s all these charges?” I flip through my bank statement. “Why you buying fuckin’ pampers? Something you wanna tell me?”
Ruthie tucks her dark hair behind her ear. “I bought them for Wylla Mae.”
“Who the fuck is Wylla?”
“Alexa’s daughter. I felt so awful for the poor girl. She has no help. Her parents are dreadful people, and she meant so much to Rochelle. It felt like the right thing to do.”
I steel my facial expression, not wanting Ruthie to gauge my reaction to the news Alexa kept our daughter. My chest squeezes so damn tight I’d swear I’m having a heart attack if I didn’t know better. She didn’t give her up. Our little girl. Fuck me. Fuck me hard. “Since when do you give a shit about what happens to Alexa?”
My wife laughs. “I told you. Her baby might be my half-sister.”
“Cut the fucking bullshit. What kind of game are you playing at?”
“No game. It’s the truth.” She moves in, slinging my papers out my lap. “You kno
w visiting with her...brings back all those good memories. When we first had Rochelle. I want a baby, James, and you’re going to give me one.”
“Why in the hell would I do that?”
“Because you love me and want to make me happy.” She kisses my jaw and I pull away. “Don’t be like that. We deserve a second chance don’t, we?”
“How many times we gonna try and get it wrong?”
“As many as it takes. Make a baby with me.” Her hand slides down my neck. “I want a baby, honey. Do this one thing for me.”
I jerk away. “Having another kid won’t replace Rochelle. Won’t change a damn thing.”
“I bet I can change your mind.”
“You think so?”
Her lips move to my ear and the words she whispers, sends an artic chill down my spine that’s so damn cold my blood could freeze.
“The fuck did you just say to me?”
A coy smile plays at her lips. “You heard me, lover. Give me a baby, and I’ll grant you the freedom you crave. Now take off your pants.”
**
“What ya need?” Grudge rubs his jaw.
“Want you to do something for me.”
“Name it.”
“Ruthie. Gotta funny feeling. Need you to keep an eye on her. You see her talking to anyone or doing anything weird. Let me know. Keep it between us. Don’t let her know you’re following her.”
“I can do that. You can count on me, brother.”
“Good.” I grunt, and he takes off.
I light up another blunt and Nickel flops down in the chair across from me. “Let me get a hit of that.”
I reach it across the table. “How’d that last run go?”
“A-Okay. No problems. Even picked up an extra twenty-five percent for a job well done.”
“And the other side detail. She still using the account?”
“Yeah. Man, look. How long you gonna keep this shit up?”
“Keep putting money in it. She see you?”
“Nope. Though I did see something I’m not sure you’re gonna like.” He passes the blunt back.
I take another hit. “And what’s that?”
“Not sure if I should tell you or let you figure that shit out on your own.” He grins and reaches for the Mary Jane again.
I take another hard puff before handing it over. I cough and slap at my chest. “Can’t do that.”
“Brother, I respect the fuck outta you, but that’s your God damn kid. Ruthie sniffing your ass every time you make a move or not.”
“I’m not ready to see her.”
“Alexa or the kid?” he hands the blunt back.
“Both, but mostly Alexa. Bitch burns through my veins like heroin.”
“Hardest addiction to kick.”
I blow out a ring of smoke. “Exactly. I see her and all I wanna do is rip her clothes off and fuck her till neither of us can see straight.” I take another hit. “Did that little fuck stick she was seeing leave town?”
“Yeah. He got smart. Likes his pretty boy face too much. I don’t get you.” He shakes his head, and Kristen slides a beer in front of him and replaces my empty.
“Yeah well that makes two of us. Besides it’s better this way.”
“Better for who? You’re fucking miserable. Married to a cunt.”
“Watch it. That cunt is still my wife and pregnant with my son.”
“Fuck. For real?”
“Yeah. Wanted to wait to say anything until we knew for sure.”
“Then congrats, Prez. Guess you won’t care that I saw Alexa working the pole at the Lion’s Den.” He smirks and knocks back his beer.
“The fuck did you just say?”
“Me and a few of the boys swung by last night on our way back into town. Gotta say...fine piece of ass like that had my kid no man would be tossing singles at her ass and seeing her titties. And what a fine ass and rack she has. Having that baby did her body good. She musta been drinking a helluva lot of milk.”
I shove my chair back and jump up. “What time is it?”
“I’d say it’s about time you got your head out your ass and claimed your bitch before someone else moves in.”
I ignore him as he laughs. All I see is red and I’m about to be a bull in a china shop. I climb onto my Road King and ride out. I’m gonna spank her ass. Alexa has no business working in a dump like this. I’ve been funneling money into an account for her. Plenty enough to cover her rent. any bills, and to make sure the baby won’t want for a damn thing.
I park and light up a cigarette. Fucking place is booming. Then I see it. A fucking poster by the front door. Alexa in a black leather bikini straddling a Harley looking like every man’s wet dream come true.
I snatch the poster off the brick and wad it up.
“Hey, man. The fuck?” One of the bouncer’s snarls at me.
I step into his space. He takes one look at the President’s patch on my cut and realizes his mistake. My club owns this shithole. Hence the fucking name Lion’s Den.
“My bad. Go on in.”
“Want all these taken down.” I grunt and shove the poster into his chest.
“She’s our main feature,” he mutters.
I don’t give a fuck what they think she is. Alexa isn’t gonna be their anything for much longer. Gonna jerk a damn knot in her head. Since I’m here I might as well scope shit out and see how Marco is running the place since we gave Lion’s man Dingo the boot. I grab a table toward the back. I don’t know if I want Alexa to know I’m here. Been months since we’ve been face to face. Since we’ve touched. Since I walked out the door on her and didn’t look back.
I pull out my phone and dial Slick. “Got a job for you. Need the apartment wired and a room setup for surveillance in the basement. No one else on this. I don’t have time to get in touch with the Reapers to do it nice. I want it done now. Get in and out.” I end the call. Should have done that shit months ago. Least I can see my kid without Ruthie knowing or being tempted by Alexa.
I signal one of the bitches working the floor to bring me a shot. Marco better get some hot ass in here because once I take Alexa out the rotation, he’ll lose business. Knocking back one shot after the next, I sit through a few sets wondering when Alexa will grace the stage.
My cell buzzes with a call from Ruthie. I send her to voice mail. I’m not in the mood for more of her shit right now. I need a fucking break. The crowd moves closer to the main stage, growing louder. The lights dim. “Ladies and gentlemen the reason you’re all here, welcome to the stage Lexi.”
I sit up at the sound of a motorcycle roaring onto the stage. The bouncer shuts it off leaving Alexa on the back with the spotlight shining on her. Seeing her riding bitch on another man’s biker is a punch to the gut even if it’s all for show. Play With Fire by Sam Tinnesz filters through the sound system. Dressed in a black leather bikini top, Daisy Dukes, and knee-high boots like on the fucking poster, all the blood in my body shoots straight to my dick at the sight of her. Smoke covers the floor of the stage. The lighting switches to red strobe lights and an image of fire pops up on a loop on the screen behind her.
Is this a fucking strip show or a theatrical production? I snort to myself and do another shot.
Alexa leans forward, practically humping the seat of the bike. I already want to charge the damn stage, sling her over my shoulder, spank her ass raw, and fuck her brains out. Been months and the attraction I have for her seems to only grow stronger. After her little display on the motorcycle, she trades it for the pole.
Rubbing up and down it seductively she unbuttons her shorts, teasing at what’s beneath them—my own personal paradise. All them years of cheerleading paid off. Her routine appears effortless. She loses the boots and denim shorts. Strutting across the stage in fishnets and a thong, teasing at removing her bikini top, the crowd loves her. I watch powerless to stop the performance. It hurts like hell knowing she’s meant to be mine, and I can’t have her.
It’s for her own good
. She wouldn’t understand why I’ve made the choices I have. I’ll carry the burden of it till the day I die, aching for her. Unable to stay away, I inch closer to the stage, bulldozing my way through any motherfucker who stands between us. My pretty girl commands attention and fuck me she’s got mine. My cock swells, craving her sweet pussy.
Chapter Twenty-seven
“The fuck you think you’re doing?” James grips me by the elbow and drags me into one of the private lounges of Lion’s Den, the strip club I’ve been dancing at to support Wylla Mae and me.
My heart leaps to my throat at the sight of him. I’ve done as he said. I’ve stayed away. I’ve not asked him for anything. I used the account he set up for me a few times out of basic necessity until I started working here. I never thought I’d be in this situation. Taking my clothes off and flashing my tits and ass for a little cash. I have a daughter to support though, and for her I’ll do whatever it takes to give her the world.
“What’s it look like? I’m trying to earn money to take care of my daughter.”
“She’s my kid too.”
“Ha.” I laugh in his face as he backs me up until the backs of my knees hit the couch. “My daughter doesn’t need a damn thing you got to offer her. Why don’t you run on home to Ruthie and play house?”
He grabs my chin, his gaze burning with fury. “You don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Right. Okay. I heard you’re having another kid. Congratulations.” Some members of his club stop in often and Mitzi, one of the dancers who has taken me under her wing fucks Nickel. She doesn’t know James is the father of my child, but she loves to gossip.
“What happened to you, Lex? This...” his hand rubs down my side, and I shiver. “Taking off your clothes for money... I don’t like it.”
“You don’t have to like it. You don’t get to tell me what to do anymore. You gave up the right when you signed your rights to my kid away. I got your papers.” They were stuck under the door of my apartment. When I saw that he signed his rights away that was it. The last shred of hope I had that we’d be together gone. He’s proven he’ll never change his ways and that he doesn’t give a shit about us.
Tempting The Biker (Royal Bastards MC: Charleston, WV Book 3) Page 16
