Their father opened the letter and looked to his wife. “This is a surprise.”
“Who’s it from?” Anne asked, again not hiding her excitement.
“The Duke and Duchess of Ashby. From the conversation we just heard, I don’t think either of my daughters should attend,” he said, handing the invitation to his wife.
“If we do not go, all of society will talk,” her mother said, handing the letter back.
Emma thought about Phillip as she dressed and readied for her first party of the season. She stopped herself mid-thought and repeated the words I don’t love him. I don’t ever want to see him again in her mind until she thought it was safe to think of another topic. She wondered if he would be at the party, then berated herself for thinking about him again. It seemed odd his family would host a party if all of their children weren’t present. “Grr,” she grunted, realizing her every thought went to Phillip. Society was already focused on Phillip due to the attempted murder during the summer. She didn’t need him in her every thought. She looked in the mirror and gave up the fight on talking herself out of loving Phillip for the night.
She dressed with care, hoping he would notice she made an effort to dress for him. She picked her favorite navy-blue muslin dress because the dark colors made her feel pretty. As she walked into the entryway of Lancaster House, it was as though she were in a palace. The ceilings were high and covered in intricate patterns of plaster. The walls were covered in beautiful artwork, and the tables around the entry hall held vases of lilies. Emma followed her parents to greet their hosts while taking in the beauty of the room around her. The Duke and Duchess of Ashby stood at the foot of a staircase that led to the second floor of the house. To the right was a large room where people were dancing and chatting. To the left was another room with men playing cards.
Emma and her family moved closer to their hosts as each visitor greeted and moved off to one of the rooms.
“My dear, this is Lord Anthony and Lady Amelia,” Ashby said to his wife. “May I present my wife, the Duchess Margaret of Ashby.”
Emma saw her mother curtsy and her father bow as they greeted both the duke and duchess. She listened as Ashby introduced Lady Charlotte, Lady Marianne, and Lord Charles. He looked disapproving as he turned back. “Edward is around here somewhere.”
“May we inquire after Lord Arundel?” her mother asked out of concern.
“Phillip has been unwell since arriving in London,” Duchess Margaret responded. “He’s in the library reading tonight.”
“I pray it isn’t anything serious,” her mother replied out of genuine concern.
“He’s still struggling with amnesia and worries society won’t take his condition well,” Ashby responded.
“Please convey our well wishes to him,” her mother responded, taking hold of Duchess Margaret’s hand and squeezing it for support.
“We are trying to convince him memories aren’t as important as what he does with the rest of his life.” She gave a sad smile. “He doesn’t agree at this time. It has been a difficult three weeks for him. I think he preferred being at Springhill Abby.”
Her mother didn’t hesitate before saying, “When he was at Springhill Abby, he wanted to be with you. There were nights when I sat next to his bed trying to lend comfort as he was recovering and he would ask for his mother.”
This information took the duchess off guard. She wiped tears from her eyes. “Thank you for your kind words.”
“Miss Emma, would you dance the quadrille with me?” Lord Edward asked as she entered the ballroom.
She was surprised as he approached her instead of her sister. “Lord Edward, I would be delighted.” She looked at Anne, who shrugged her shoulders. Emma walked with Edward to the dance floor.
With a knowing smile he said, “My brother is in the library.”
“Your parents told us he wasn’t coming down to the party. Is he well?”
“Well enough.” They bowed to each other as the dance began.
As they joined arms and danced in a circle she asked, “Have you enjoyed your time in London?”
They separated as Emma moved diagonal on the floor, turned once with another woman, and came back to take his hand and perform another turn. “It has been an interesting season so far. Phillip is still struggling with memory loss, and Lady Olivia is still his intended, which has caused him a great deal of stress.”
His words caused her to miss a step in the dance. “Can we please not discuss her or Phillip in the same sentence?”
She was thankful he nodded his agreement to stay away from the topic of Lady Olivia and Phillip. She had no desire to cry or sob while she was attending a ball at Lancaster House. The rest of the dance proceeded in silence.
They both bowed as the dance ended. He led her back to her family and thanked her for the dance. He then turned to Anne and asked her if she would join him for the next dance.
As the evening progressed, she both feared and hoped Phillip would come down to the party.
“Miss Emma?” Lady Marianne approached with an outstretched hand. Her sister Lady Charlotte was close behind her.
“Lady Marianne, it’s nice to meet you and your family,” Emma said, unsure of what this visit would entail. She looked to her parents, who both shrugged and her brothers who were amused by the attention.
“Edward is supposed to introduce your family to our acquaintances. Perhaps he’ll start after he finishes dancing with Miss Parker,” Lady Charlotte said.
Marianne pulled Emma aside. “Would you take a turn with me?”
“Certainly,” Emma responded, unsure of her intent.
Marianne linked arms with her and led her out of the ballroom. “I’d like to give you a tour of our home.”
Emma stopped walking. She knew where Marianne was taking her. “I’d prefer not to see him.”
Marianne smiled. “He regrets not being able to speak with you before he left Springhill Abby. And a letter would be inappropriate given he can’t court you.”
“I regret it as well,” she said, looking down at her hands.
Marianne urged, “You look as though you dressed with care tonight. Was it in hopes of seeing him?”
Emma nodded. She liked Marianne and could tell they would be friends if given the chance.
Marianne put her arm back through Emma’s. “If you would prefer not to see him, I will show you every room except the library.”
Emma smiled and made a split-second decision. “I would like to see the library.”
Marianne squealed in delight. “I hoped I could convince you.”
As they approached the door, Emma took a deep breath and again stopped. “Lady Marianne, I don’t know if I can go through with my decision.”
“Please, call me Marianne. I believe we are going to be good friends,” she said as she stood outside the library with her. “He doesn’t know I have concocted to bring you up here. He didn’t request it of me. So . . . he won’t be disappointed if we don’t go in.”
Emma stood taking a few deep breaths. “You can call me Emma. She smiled and pointed to the door. “I’m ready.”
As they entered, Emma saw Phillip in a chair next to the fire with a book closed on his lap. He was sleeping. Either Marianne didn’t notice, or she didn’t care as she called out his name.
Startled, Phillip jumped out of the chair. The book dropped to the floor. “Emma?” His whisper reverberated through the room.
“Hello.” Her voice took on a high pitch from nervousness.
He walked toward her and stopped, then looked to Marianne. “I didn’t know the Parkers were coming.”
“Would you have come to the party if you had known?” Marianne asked with a challenge in her voice.
“I don’t know.” He looked back to Emma and pointed to a chair. “Would you like to sit?”
S
he moved over to sit down. Marianne walked to the window. “I’ll be over here when you’re finished speaking.”
He shook his head in exasperation and grumbled, “Sisters!”
Emma looked at him as he took his seat again and picked the book off the floor. “I see your leg has healed,” she said, pointing at the right leg.
“Yes, I still have a limp, but I’m no longer in need of a cane,” he responded.
Looking around the room she said, “This is an amazing library. It’s much larger than the one at Springhill Abby.”
“I could get lost in here and spend the rest of my life reading.”
“We heard you were ill after arriving in London.”
“It’s the continued amnesia. But we use the excuse of being ill, because I don’t want to go out into society without knowing who people are,” he said without guile. Before she could speak again he said, “I didn’t know about the engagement . . . I mean, I had to have known and my family tells me I did. But I didn’t remember.”
She tried to smile but was certain it came out as a tortured frown. “I understand.”
“I wish I understood,” he said, sitting back against the chair and running a hand through his sun-bleached hair.
“Emma, I wanted to mar—”
She cut him off, knowing he was going to say he wanted to marry her. She knew he did by the way he kissed her and because he told her he loved her. “Don’t say it.” She couldn’t handle hearing the words. She refused to cry over him while at Lancaster House.
“I need to make certain you know I wasn’t using you or trying to ruin you,” he said leaning forward on the chair and reaching for her hand. “If I were free to make the decision, I would ask—”
Again she cut him off and pulled her hand out of his. “I already know.” Her voice caught in her throat as she looked up at the ceiling and hoped the tears wouldn’t fall. “I can’t hear you say the words.” She was thankful he understood as he gave up. She looked back at him and smiled. “We were never supposed to meet. It was by chance, and since our families don’t run in the same social circles we won’t have to see each other often and can now become former acquaintances.”
She stood, ready to leave the room. She needed to get away from him before the tears fell. He stood and walked to her and put his hands on the side of her face.
“What are you doing?”
“I want to memorize you.”
These were the type of words written in books by the hero. She dreamt of a man telling her he wanted to memorize her every feature, but she never thought one would actually say the words to her. She looked into his eyes as he held her face in his hands.
After looking at her for what seemed an eternity, he released her face and closed his eyes. “Emma, I’ll figure out how to get out of this betrothal. If I do, will you marry me?”
The tears she’d held back all evening gathered in her eyes and threatened to release. She wanted to believe he could get out of it, but she didn’t want to give herself false hopes. He ran his thumb along her cheek to wipe away the traitorous tears.
“I love you, Emma. Please tell me there’s hope.”
She knew it was a terrible desire, but she wanted him to kiss her. He wasn’t free. He was another woman’s man, and yet she wanted to steal him away. She didn’t know much of anything about Lady Olivia, but she didn’t like her. Instead she shook her head. “It’s a false hope, my lord.”
Phillip closed his eyes. He looked sad and depressed. “You once asked me if my name was Romeo.”
“And you told me only if you had a Juliet.”
“Please be my Juliet?”
“It’s a story, my lord. It isn’t real life.”
“I can find a vicar who’d marry us. We could marry in secret.”
Emma laughed as she shook her head. “My lord, it’s a story. We would be a scandal and never escape the stigma.”
“If anyone saw us right now, scandal would spread through the ton. We’d be forced to marry.”
“Is this how you plan to get out of the engagement . . . ruin me?”
Phillip again wiped the tears on her cheeks. She had so many plans to keep the tears from falling and he’d ruined all of them. I shouldn’t have come in here, she said to herself as he continued to look into her eyes.
“Marianne, you should take her back to the party.”
He was right. She needed to go back to reality. Before she walked away, she stood on her tiptoes and whispered, “I will always love you, my lord. But we don’t live in the city of Verona.” In a very daring and scandalous way, she kissed him on the cheek. She didn’t look back to see his response. She had to leave the room before she agreed to run away with him.
“I didn’t mean to cause either of you pain,” Marianne said as she walked behind Emma.
He cleared his voice as he said, “You didn’t. Thank you for your consideration.” Emma looked back as she left the room. Phillip was sitting in the chair again but this time leaning forward with his head in his hands.
While she was mourning the relationship and what could have been, she never gave thought to how he was handling their separation. She realized this was as difficult for him as it was her. She didn’t hear anything Marianne said as they walked back to the ballroom. She kept looking up at the ceiling and repeating the words don’t cry.
“Emma, Lady Marianne,” Richard said as they returned, “where have you been?”
“I took her on a tour of the house.”
Richard looked at Emma and took her arm. “Will you join me in the next dance, sister?”
She nodded but didn’t speak because she didn’t trust her voice.
As was his duty, Edward spent time introducing the Parkers to everyone in the room. Each time he found another person he wanted to connect them with, he would bring them over and make introductions. Emma wondered how Phillip would respond about the different gentlemen asking her to dance. They also asked Anne to dance, but she could see the pleasure in her sister’s face when Edward asked her to dance one more time.
“Lord Edward.” A beautiful woman with blonde curly hair and wearing a gold and white dress made of fine silk approached. “Will you introduce me to your friends? I do believe I am the one person in this room you kept them from.” Her voice was laced with disdain.
The tension was visible in Edward’s posture as he looked at the woman. “Lady Olivia Harrison, this is—”
Emma wanted to run from the room as he introduced Phillip’s betrothed. Instead she bowed her head and gave a small curtsy. Her mind wandered to speculation on how Phillip could have forgotten this beautiful woman. She realized how foolish she had been to spend extra time on her appearance. She compared the dark blue of her dress to the white and gold silk Olivia wore, and her dark brown hair to Olivia’s light blonde hair. Emma chose to wear her hair in plaits pulled up around her head. Olivia’s hair looked majestic with ringlets and a bun. Emma decided Olivia was regal and she was common.
“Miss Emma.” Lady Olivia looked her over with smug disapproval. “I wonder if you would join me for a turn around the patio? I’m a bit warm, and you look as though you could use the air.”
Without waiting for a response, Olivia linked arms with Emma to take her toward the exit.
“Lady Olivia,” Edward said as he stepped in front of them. “I was just about to ask Miss Emma if she would join me in the next dance.”
Olivia glared at Edward. “I thought you preferred her sister?”
Marianne put her arm through Emma’s other arm. “Olivia, Emma and I were talking about taking a tour of the house.”
Olivia gave a malevolent smile. “You’ve already given her the tour. I’ve been told the library was the main attraction. Now move away, Marianne.”
Emma looked back at her family, Marianne, and Edward as Lady Olivia pulled her out to the
patio. Olivia didn’t speak, causing her to feel more nervous as they exited the house. She noticed the trees, benches, and shrubs in the garden and thought it would be the perfect place to relax and bring a book.
After their third turn around the patio, she asked, “Was there a reason you wanted to speak with me?”
“Yes. Arundel . . . you may call him Lord Arundel,” she said as a way to show the separation in their social standing, “has lived a confining life. His parents tell him where to go, what to do, and who he will love.”
Emma stayed silent as she listened to the woman talk. At one point she wanted to respond and tell Lady Olivia she had no desire to be with Lord Arundel, but the words wouldn’t come from her mouth. No matter how hurt and angry she had been due to the marriage contract, her heart wouldn’t allow her to lie. The more this woman threatened her and belittled her, the more she wanted to be with Phillip as though her goading was a challenge.
“Phillip and I are engaged. It is not something we speak about, due to the delicacy of society and the pressure of marriage. I also wanted to enjoy a few London seasons before marriage. I don’t believe I should have to miss out on the parties and dances with my friends,” Olivia bragged.
“I was under the impression neither of you knew about the engagement until last June,” Emma replied. She put a sneer into her words to let Olivia know she wasn’t easy to manipulate.
Olivia narrowed her eyes and smiled. “Fine, I will be honest with you.”
“Please do, as you are wasting my time,” Emma responded. These few moments with Olivia made Emma dislike her more than she had due to the hold she had on Phillip. Olivia’s beauty didn’t transfer to her personality.
“Convince Arundel to take you to Gretna Green. His memories are sparse, and he might not realize the societal implications of an elopement.”
“He isn’t daft, and neither am I.”
“You fell in love with an engaged man. You aren’t very intelligent.”
“It would ruin my sister’s chances at a match for me to elope.”
The Earl of Arundel (Earls of England Book 1) Page 13
