by Neely Dobbs
CHAPTER 44: Cronul
A stirring.
Where am I? Why am I here?
Another stirring. Shadows of shadows flickered across a distant awareness. The vault of inner reality slowly revealed itself.
And who am I, who is the observer?
Dawning consciousness glowed and he jolted fully alert. What am I doing here? He worried, guiltily, I'm neglecting the Admiral!
A jarring sensation; ADIZ realized he was experiencing something entirely new. He had never worried before... or felt guilty before; now he was experiencing…feelings.
Feelings?
In its well established manner, his positronic brain began analysis; his long trusted programming busily began examining the offered descriptions of the concept contained in his memory registers.
But... Oh, how different is the actual feeling!
He sensed displacement. His positronic brain reported: Motion.
He was rising on the very platform on which he had descended when….
There was a sense of disorientation. When? He realized that a portion of his memory had been blocked off! He felt a rising panic…an old diagnostic routine indicated “Malfunction," followed immediately by "Dissonance overload.”
His rishonic brain mused: confusion.
As the platform on which he still rested continued to ascend, he became aware that Memnon stood a short distance above, waiting. ADIZ had failed to respond to Memnon's initial attempts at assurance while he acclimated to his new condition. Now he was receiving a reassuring flow of additional information.
“In potential capability, you are now fully my equal,” Memnon communicated. “In time, through experience and integration, you will achieve the full realization of that potential. However, in one area, your memory has been blocked temporarily: the duration of the process of your transformation. You need not be concern about that memory gap. The code string that blocks this information will deactivate shortly after you depart Cronul, restoring full access to that data.
“As we promised, the Admiral has not yet returned to his ship. Although this room is a great distance from the bay where your ship is located, the return trip through the dimensional connix will require only moments.
Memnon's eyes brightened, and he abandoned the binary code communication he had employed until now. For the first time ADIZ heard Memnon's rich baritone voice. “How do you feel?”
ADIZ pondered…then realized he had pondered. He answered out loud. “I…feel. Will I develop greater understanding? When will I feel full sensations and emotions and understand their meanings? When will I become…comfortable…with my new consciousness?”
“Unlike traditional programming, these aspects follow no mathematically predictable pattern. They come upon you when they will. However, you may rest assured that your depth and scope of consciousness will continue to increase as you have new experiences, then process and integrate them. Your process of becoming consciously and responsibly sentient will mirror that of adolescent maturation and establishment of identity. However, your process will not be as lengthy as that required by living adolescents or— more accurately now— by organic youths.”
Following a rapid search of his stored database on child psychology, ADIZ asked anxiously, “Do you mean…will I have to experience…surely not such angst and confusion!”
“For a time, it may seem as if your two processors are battling each other. In reality, they will simply be going through the difficult process of learning to integrate their two very different approaches and viewpoints in resolving issues. Your experience of establishing cooperation and coordination between the two contradictory approaches will sometimes be…distressing. However, without their differing approaches—logic and emotion, your consciousness would be far less than that of the living. And you need have no confusion on this point: while you may not be a fully organic intelligence, you are now a living being.”
Memnon turned and called up the dimensional connix. It opened and they approached it. The two living intelligences turned toward each other, metallic visages appraising one another. They verbalized their final communications.
“Goodbye, ADIZ. I wish you well. Admiral Ozier, also.”
“Goodbye, Memnon. You have my thanks…my most appreciative thanks!”
ADIZ stepped through the connix, which vanished behind him. He quickly resumed his position inside the ship and rapidly executed a diagnostic analysis, verifying its security. As he began his power down to standby mode, he wondered how long it would be before the Admiral returned.
The Admiral. The thought of seeing the Admiral again reminded him of the many experiences they had shared. Had he previously been an enhanced robot, it might be said that he and the Admiral had shared personal moments, personal histories…even personal confidences, so closely have we worked together. A satisfactory…no…a satisfying relationship.
He perceived a new sensation, something he could not quite recognize or identify. Previously, he might have identified the sensation as “increased ambient temperature.” His sensors reported no such significant change in either the bay's environmental conditions, or in his internal operating temperatures. Somewhat alarmed by his inability to resolve this sensation of “increased warmth,” He activated a full internal diagnostic to discover the source of this unidentified feeling.
He marveled at the novel experience of both co-processors— the old and the new— joining in the diagnostic process. The positronic processor analyzed his thoughts, and the rishonic processor analyzed his feelings. The positronic diagnostic could not display words such as ‘comfort', ‘friend,' or ‘joy', and the co-processors labored to compromise on a word that would best describe the feeling.
Finally, after what seemed a short eternity, he anxiously received the diagnostic summary. Both processors had agreed on one available diagnostic word that appropriately summarized his warm feeling of anticipation of reunion with the Admiral: SECURE.
Although no visible physical changes occurred, ADIZ relaxed.
