by Gail Merritt
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Ardin returned three days later, full of tales of his travels and the people he had met. It was as if he had never been away, except that we spent even more time together. He enthralled me with descriptions of Thanis. Despite his father insistin that he assume greater responsibilities, he always managed to slip away to spend the afternoons in the garden with me and the fox. As my strength returned we began riding again. Gilbert enjoyed this because he could trot shoulder to shoulder with Gavalan. He tried every way to engage the royal horse in conversation but became miserable when Gavalan ignored him. It was fortunate that after speaking to Gavalan myself, I discovered that he was deaf in one ear, the result of a wayward firework during the Prince’s celebrations. I told him about Gilbert’s frustrated attempts to speak with him and on the following day the noble creature wasted no time explaining his disability and positioning himself to hear Gilbert.
Sometimes the King and Silver Mantle joined us and it was during a certain picnic that a casual remark made by the King changed our lives. We rode down to the river and followed the Listi to a small ford. It was one of our favourite places. Ardin loved to gallop through the shallow water, sending spray everywhere and terrifying the local ducks. Silver Mantle had used some simple magic to arrange a table of food in the meadow beyond the river. We were laughing as we shared the homely meal.
The King smiled at me. ‘My son has great enthusiasm for every task that I set him, and I have you to thank for that, Megwin. Ardin is always eager to be free for his afternoons with you.’ Ardin and I smiled at each other. The King took my hand, smiling in that wonderful way he had of making you feel as if you were a person of importance to him. ‘I used to joke that I had acquired a daughter because you were both inseparable, but I no longer thank that my son regards you as his sister. No one tries this hard to be with their sister!’ I think I blushed and I know Ardin grinned.
The King was enjoying the moment. ‘Such a sister would be pleasant, but with such a wife, he would have the kingdom running more efficiently than I ever could!’ Pleased with his declaration, the King bit heartily into a chunk of fine cheese, unaware of the change in the atmosphere about him. Ardin tried an embarrassed smile. I responded in kind, feeling a strange thumping in my head as my face grew hot. Silver Mantle said nothing, gave no signals that she had heard anything a all, and it was this nothingness that quenched my blushes. I felt the ice between us. The day was suddenly overcast. I kept my head bent, giving all my attention to the cheese. We were all poised on the edge of a change in our relationships and we could never reverse.
The King looked up and laughed. ‘You all look so serious!’ He poured more wine. ‘I could not be happier. I could search the Five Kingdoms to find a wife for my son and not find one more suitable. Oh, I will say nothing until you are both older, but set your minds at ease. I approve and encourage your romance to blossom. Oh and Ardin, you will have a father-in-law who can teach you everything about the hunt.’ I thought my father would be pleased.
‘I can see from her stern look that Silver Mantle has disturbing news for me.’ The King gave her the most beguiling smile.
‘We heard rumours in Thanis that Llewid was building his army and gathering new friends.’ Ardin added. ‘Is it possible that he intends to challenge your kingship?’
‘Possible, but fool-hardy,’ the King told him. ‘Come sweet Lady let us walk together.’ He offered her his hand and as they walked away we heard him murmur, ‘It is a great comfort to know that Ardin cares for such a delightful girl. She has a look of her mother and she reminds me of you, when you were her age.’
We sat in silence for a long time. My mind was trying to break the thought barrier that Silver Mantle had created about herself and waiting for Ardin to speak first. He did not. Instead he began to skim stones across the widest part of the ford.
I spoke first. ’I wish it could be unsaid’.
‘I wish that too, but not because it’s untrue.’ He returned to my side. ‘You must know that I care for you but I wanted to say it at the right time, when we were both ready.’
I was quite for a moment thinking of what to say, then I took his hand. ‘That doesn’t have to change. Your father is thinking about your future and the future of the kingdom. This has nothing to do with us as we are now. We can go on being friends until we want to change that.’
‘Yes!’ He brightened. ‘It really doesn’t change anything. We just know what the future might be, that’s all. Except,’ he grimaced, ‘he will probably want you to sit next to me at every official banquet from now on.’
I tried to look very serious and nodded. ‘I shall just have to cope with that. It’s not too much to ask. That is, unless you want to sit next to someone else.’
‘Never!’ Ardin returned to his food with a grin but something was churning in the back of my mind, something that felt like a small maggot eating out the heart of a healthy apple. When the King and Silver Mantle returned, he was in a bright mood but she appeared to have found a maggot of her own. We said nothing though we both knew that we would have to speak about this further and soon.
The opportunity came the very next day at breakfast. I knew she waited me to go down to her apartments and when I arrived a breakfast place was already prepared. I never questioned how we could both know so much of what the other wanted. It was just the way our relationship worked. She looked as if she had not slept well and as soon as I took my seat at her table, she began.
‘Do you love Prince Ardin?’
‘I don’t know.’ I was trying to be honest. I was still unsure about what real love meant. I knew that I was fond of him and enjoyed his company, and sometimes when we touched I felt a tingle of excitement. All this I conveyed to her so that she could assess my feelings.
‘You know that you have the ability to become Silver Mantle after me.’ This remark was not what I expected.
‘I have no ambitions to lead the Souran.’ Again I tried to be honest. I knew I had great power but I had no illusions about my abilities to lead. There were surely many Mantles and novices who could do that far better than I.
‘I have been grooming you as my successor. All the Souran know that. Anyone with doubts would have lost them after you returned from the quest.’ I remembered what Black Mantle had said about the risk she had taken showing her bias towards me.
‘But Ardin …’ I spluttered.
‘Ardin will need a strong Silver Mantle.’ She walked to the window and looked out across the garden. ‘Llewid of Dereculd in growing more powerful and bolder in his stance against Magra. Yes, your good friend Llewid. He has launched an invasion of the lands to the south. When he has taken them, as he will for the leaders of those flea-blown territories are weak and disorganised, he will look north to the southern reaches of Magra, then up through the Meeds. He will encircle the valley of the Listi. Then, I believe, it won’t be too long before his eyes are set on Vellin.’
‘But I could help Ardin if I was his wife.’
‘A wife is nothing!’ She spat the words out. ‘A wife is a pretty decoration at best, selected to bear the heirs and nothing more. The wife of the King holds no position, no voice to say what should happen. Her opinion is not sought and if given is firmly ignored. You would give him comfort but you could not help him as I can help the King, as his equal. A wife could not use her powers or advise her husband as a Silver Mantle can. If she tried to there would be many who would call it meddling. If you wish to strengthen your relationship with Ardin, abandon your wish to br his wife and work hard to learn the art of statesmanship, enough to impress the Souran. If you truly love him, then work to be at his side, rather than standing always behind him. That is where your love should take you.’
I faced her. It was her time to be honest with me. ‘Do you love your King?’
‘Yes.’ Her voice was steady, her eyes clear and open. ‘I have loved him all my remembered life. I watched him marry someone and saw him share his life with her and then wi
th her son. I even saw him loose his heart to others after her death. I could have given up my power and married him. I had that chance, but I knew that I could better show my devotion by being his closest friend, adviser, and sometimes protector.’
I was on my feet. My chest felt tight, strangled. ‘I need time to think.’ Inside I was thinking faster than the words I gave to her. ‘I doubt that I can stand by and see him marry someone else. I can’t give him up on the vague promise that i might become his Silver Mantle. Forgive me, I have to think!’ Even in the garden, after I had fled from her, my mind was full of noise and anger. I might not love Ardin but I cared enough to know that I could not sit back and see him love another, after he had shown how much he cared for me. I fled the garden and the Angirat and found myself beside the Listi.
‘So, you have discovered the fate that Olemia has prepared for you and you don’t like it.’ Black Mantle’s sudden appearance in my mind could be annoying. I told him that. ‘But I have not appeared. I will leave you in peace, alone with your dilemma, if you wish. I thought that you might need someone to talk to.’
‘How can I give him up?’ I waved my arms in the air in a gesture of despair.
‘You would not be giving him up. You would be keeping him forever.’
‘But not as a man. I could never feel his arms about me. Worse, I would have to watch him hold someone else.’
‘All that is true. I cannot deny it.’ I felt the awful misery down within his own heart. It made my eyes cloud. His sorrow went far beyond a tutor sympathising with a pupil. He was revealing his own anguish. ‘Many of the Souran love and cannot show that love. To be close, to share minds and lives, sometimes has to be enough. Sometimes the ones we love do not return our love, do not even know the love is there. At least you would always know that he loves you.’
I wanted to rush back to him room in the Talarin and hold him close. I felt his misery so clearly and I realised the depth of his darkest secret. Silver Mantle loved the King and could not show him. Black Mantle loved her and knew she was oblivious of his feelings. What a collection of misery we had become, locking ourselves away in our white towers, dazzling with our powers and yet not being able to tell another person that we loved them. I had much to think about.
Ardin showed no restraint. He brought me flowers and wrote poetry. He took pleasure in trying to surprise me and thrived on our moments together. His father did just what Adrin had predicted and I found myself at his side at every banquet and function. We secretly held hands below the table, sometimes he would grip my hand tightly, preventing me from eating until I kicked him. The King saw it all and it delighted him. Silver Mantle also watched it all and made her own plans.
15.
Green Mantle
News came to the Talarin that Green Mantle was returning. Our last meeting had returned me to his favour, and I eager to see him again and hear his new stories. As I spent most of my time at the Palace, I hoped that there would be some time alone with him. Neither novice nor acknowledged Mantle, I sometimes longed to be back with the other students, listening to Silius Kahnis and daydreaming about the quest to come.
‘I love the early morning. Only the birds are here to share it with me.’ Of course, we met before he had even reached the gates of the Talarin. The morning chorus told him where he could find me, walking with the fox on the goat tracks of the Angirat. He called to me and came striding across the rough heath, swinging his staff and waving cheerfully. ‘You look well!’ He used his staff to help him sit on the ground and motioned for me to sit beside him. The sitting brought on a bout of coughing and I remembered he had been coughing before he left the Talarin. He read my thoughts. ‘An irritation, nothing more. Too many nights sleeping on the moors and living in damp caves. Now tell me, how is everything at the Talarin?’
‘Well. I think. There are four new novices.’ I explained that I had a room in Silver Mantle’s apartments in the Palace, so all my news came from others..
‘I heard about that. And how do they deal with the news from the south? Gaheil has fallen and the Central Meeds. Of course our good friends of the forest are safe. Kings and armies don’t like dark forests. In the north, Thanis is already in Llewid’s hands, thanks to his excellent coastal navy, and the royal family are missing.’ I thought about Ardin and his fondness for the royal house of Thanis. Green Mantle shook his head. ‘It is only a matter of time before the men from Dereculd are marching up the Listi.’
‘What of the Northern Meeds?’ Channa, Ruthen and my father were also in danger.
‘They are too hard to hold. They are separated by hills and would need a larger army than Llewid’s to attack and then defend them. They are not important. No, this is where King Llewid’s plans are bringing him. He will simply bypass the north.’ He looked me up and down as I helped him to his feet. ‘You’ve grown into a lovely young woman while I’ve been away. It is good to be home!’
‘I’m glad you’re back. I’ve missed you. I wish I could travel with you.’
‘I was furious with you when I heard about your quest and then, when I knew more, I could see how such a terrible thing could happen.’ We began to walk towards the hidden gate that leads into the courtyard of the Talarin. Only the Mantles know of it, and now me. ‘I am getting old, you know and I see you as my successor. It frightened me, what you did to the vine. A Green Mantle has to love the world of natural things and it seemed that your nature was too violent, too tempestuous to care for the small things. But on the day that I left, after you and I had spoken, I happened to come across a small snail. He told me how you often spend time talking to the tiny ones in the garden and even have time to encourage the roses or scold the green fly on their buds. That, and what happened in the forest of Lore told me that there was great caring in you, and that your talents have been noticed by powers far older and greater than those gathering in this building.’ We had reached the courtyard and he sat on one of the low benches.
‘I never meant to kill that man,’I told him. ‘Black Mantle has taught me to control my thoughts carefully.’
‘You will be a great Mantle one day but now my simple mind is turning to thoughts of breakfast, which my nose tells me is hot and delicious. Come and eat with me.’
Green Mantle took me with him when he retold his news to the King and the Souran. Stories came from the south of destroyed towns and disappearing people, slaughter of farmers and their livestock and the wanton destruction of fields and orchards. He had other stories to tell. There was a rumour that King Llewid had spies in the Talarin, that one of the Mantles was in his pay. It was said that Llewid had a constant companion who wore the robes of the Souran, a Brown Mantle, who could destroy a man with her eyes, although no one who had seen her face lives to tell of it. This story angered Silver Mantle.
‘Why is it that the ignorant are always ready to blame the Souran?’ She leaned against a pillar, letting the cool marble sooth her temple. ‘There is no Brown Mantle and if there was a mind with the power of the Mantles, we would have sensed it. This is an ale-house fable.’
The King wished to send messages to Llewid, to call a truce and discuss how they could both bring an end to the destruction. The Souran each gave their opinions and there followed a long discussion. Ardin was sitting in the corner of the room. He caught my eye and we both slipped away.
‘I wish my father would let me take an army and defeat Llewid before he gains more strength.’ Ardin picked the dead flowers on a rosebush.
‘I don’t want you to get hurt!’ I cried. Ardin threw his arms about me and pulled me tightly to his chest. I could feel his heart beating and I closed my eyes, wishing we could stay like that forever but the sound of running feet pushed us apart. It was Blue Mantle, his face flushed, his robe flying behind him as he climbed three steps at a time up to the garden, heading for the small wooden door between the Talarin and the Palace. I called after him asking what was wrong. He slowed.
‘Green Mantle has collapsed!’ His words were g
asped over his shoulder but before he could open the door, I was behind him
They made the old man comfortable and Blue Mantle gathered novices to help him prepare potions. Silver Mantle insisted we all leave him to rest but he held up his hand and told me to stay. I went to his side.
‘We do not have much time and I have much to pass on to you.’
‘You must rest. We can talk in the morning.’
