by Nicole Thorn
I looked up again, seeing Aster watching me. I knew he could hear, and I wanted him to know that I didn’t regret any of this. Not even with the danger rising all around us. The gods had become a part of me, so their fight was also mine.
“You’re seventeen,” Mom said. “You can’t move out. You don’t have any money, a car, anything you need.”
“Those are all pretty easy to figure out. Aster has a truck, and his dad would probably help us get a place. The gods need us, so they aren’t going to leave us out to dry.” That didn’t go for everyone of course. I could name plenty of people they’d not helped. But I also knew that sometimes it looked like they were leaving us in the dust, and they had a bigger plan in place.
“I don’t want you to go,” Dad said. “You’re just a kid.”
“You don’t get to be a kid anymore when the gods call on you. I’m sorry for your involvement in this, and I’m sorry that no matter what you say, I have to leave. You could get killed or used against me. There are a lot of people out there that might find out about you, and do something to get at me. The man who killed my friends, he also killed Verin’s mother and he came home to her body. I don’t want that for you. You have to let me go.”
That silenced both of my parents, and I couldn’t imagine what they thought. Probably nothing good, but the lack of yelling meant things would be all right. Even if they were upset with me now, it wouldn’t last.
“When would you leave?” Dad asked.
“Maybe another week or so. I don’t know.”
Mom stiffened. “How do we know you’ll be safe?”
“I’m stronger than I used to be. I should heal much faster. I won’t get any kind of sicknesses, if that helps. I’ll have a demigod and a Hunter with me, as well as three gods and three more demigods close by. I’m psychically the weakest, but I have more than enough fire power around me.”
Dad rubbed his forehead. “I hate this a lot, but I know I can’t stop you. Jesus, I can’t even tell you to come home if something goes wrong.”
“I’ll be okay,” I promised, praying that it was true.
I stayed with them in the kitchen for a little while longer, answering the rest of the questions they had. By the end of it, it didn’t feel like they felt that much better. Eventually, they would.
“You okay?” Aster asked as he pulled me in for a hug.
I let myself melt against him, feeling calmer just to be there. “Yeah, I’ll be fine. Would you guys be okay if I went to see my friends? Something about seeing their mutilated corpses in an evil vision makes me want to check on them.”
“No problem,” Micha said.
We got into Aster’s truck and headed over to the Nelsons’ house. It looked normal and put together when we pulled up, but I didn’t know what that meant for the inside. That vision I had felt so real, but it had only been a picture. A recreation of something. I told myself that everything would be fine as soon as I went to see my friends.
“You want us to go in with you?” Aster said as he turned the truck off. “We can be your backup.”
“Yeah,” Micha said from the back. “We should probably meet your friends some time. Ya know, since I guess we’re about to fight in a war together.”
I opened my mouth to speak, but then what I had to say completely changed. “They can’t see you yet.”
“What? Why?”
I turned back to Micha. “The seers just died, and they died violently. They’ve been through a lot of hell lately, and I don’t think I should add to that by telling them about a war they can’t do a thing about. If the gods wanted them to know, then someone would have told them. It’s not our place to overstep.”
Aster tapped the steering wheel, thinking. “You’re right. I don’t want any of the gods upset with us right now. Not when tensions are high and only getting worse. We can stay out here.”
I kissed his cheek. “As soon as I can, I promise I’m gonna show you off to the whole world.”
Micha huffed. “Way to make me not feel special. Thanks so much.”
I smiled at him. “You too. I’ll be back in a few minutes. We can go get something to eat before we pack up my room.”
I got out on the passenger’s side, looking up at a gray sky as cold air hit my face. It made my skin prickle with goosebumps, but it had so much more to do with things other than the weather. I pushed it all aside so I could go see the people I loved.
When I knocked on the door, it wasn’t long before Kizzy opened it. She grinned at me in greeting, and I knocked her back before she could even fully get my name out.
“I’m so sorry about what happened! I heard the gods talking about it when you were all up talking to them.” I removed myself from Kezia so I could attack her boyfriend next. He got a big hug, and I couldn’t even tell if he objected to it. If he did, Jasper still let it happen. “If I knew, I would have told you. I had been listening since you came to see me.” I released Jasper. “I couldn’t understand anything they said before, and then I heard them talking. You’re gods now,” I gasped at them, letting the information really sink in. “That’s never happened before with your kind.”
Jasper nodded at me. “I figured. They made it sound like a big deal.”
Something stung in my chest when I thought about how big a deal it really was. Again, I didn’t want to tell them. Jasper and Kizzy looked too happy for me to come in and ruin it like that. I had to put on a happy face.
“I didn’t know it would happen like this. Six mountains will stand when the wind comes blowing. That was the prophecy. I knew you would be strong, but I didn’t understand how. I’m glad it’s like this. You get to have immortal babies and name one after me.”
Kizzy laughed it off, finally looking over my shoulder and through the opened door. “Um, does that belong to you?”
I turned, seeing Aster as he sat in the front seat, looking all adorable as he thumbed through a book. It made my heart flutter a little as I anticipated getting to cuddle up to him in some booth when we left.
I smiled proudly at the boy I loved, and then back to Kizzy. “Yeah, he’s mine. That’s my fella, Aster. I told him I needed to come see you guys to make sure you were all okay. Everything is a mess upstairs, and I needed to know my friends were all right.”
“We’re doing a lot better,” Jasper said. “And me and Kezia are getting married.”
I freaked out in an instant, jumping up and down as I squeaked with joy. Something really and actually good after all this misery. Something to distract from the things to come. Soon, there would be ugly visions and voices I didn’t want to listen to. Things I would want to push away. Things I had to listen to so I could warn those around me. It was my purpose.
“Yay!” I screamed. “That’s so great. Do I get to go?”
“Of course,” Kizzy said quickly. “You can bring Aster too.”
“Do you have a date?”
“This happened four minutes ago,” Jasper let me know. It was a surprise to hear, but so romantic that it made my stomach feel all light and happy. “You’re the only person who knows. So, don’t tell my sisters if you run into them. I can’t imagine Jasmine would be that happy to find out she wasn’t the first to know.”
“No problem,” I said. “I’m happy for the two of you, and I’m glad everything worked out. Otherwise I would have had to cause a lot of damage to the world.”
My head started to swim all the sudden, whispers growing until I couldn’t hear myself over them. The voices all sounded like a jumble that created one voice. “I don’t know who’s saying it, but I keep hearing someone talking about a storm. Something happening soon.” I couldn’t control the words I felt myself saying. My lips moved, and it was my voice, but it wasn’t me. “They’re so focused on it. The gods are preparing for something bad, and they’re talking about you.”
“What about us?” Jasper asked me.
I swallowed, wanting my body to be mine again. It felt like dirt had filled my stomach, and clouds liv
ed in my head. I couldn’t remember why I’d come here anymore. “They need you. I can’t understand what they mean, but I think someone is planning it out. The storm is coming, and they want to be prepared for it. They want to win. How do you win in a storm?” The words left me in a whisper.
No, I’m not supposed to be saying this. Why am I saying this? Who’s in my head?
“It’s getting closer,” I kept whispering, “and I can hear the thunder in my ears. It’s loud, and the wind feels cold.”
“Wind,” Kizzy said. “Like the same kind of wind that’s going to blow on us?”
No! I screamed at the thing in my brain. At the voices that weren’t allowed to be there. This was my voice, my head, my body. Mine to control, not whoever spoke so loudly that nothing else felt like it mattered. No more.
And the voices stopped. The tugging in my head slipped away like rope falling from someone’s hand. Silence, perfect silence for the first time since I had been a kid. I didn’t know how I’d done it.
I looked at my friends, realizing what I had said. No details, so I could probably find a way to walk around it. I never knew what I was talking about anyway, so I knew how to work this to my advantage. I only needed to give them a few days. Just a few days to be happy.
“Maybe. I don’t know what any of this means,” I lied. “I’ll have to keep listening so that I can put the pieces together. Once I have them, I can come back here. Can you tell the others that I said hi? I don’t want them thinking I took off without a reason.”
“Not a problem,” Kizzy said, setting me free. “Thanks for trying to help.”
Guilt came for me because of the lies, but I had to do it. If I could manage to get control over the voices in my head, then maybe I would get to the point where the takeovers didn’t happen. Where I didn’t feel like someone put their hand around my brain and started making me do things.
I gave Kizzy another hug to make myself feel better. “I just need to do something relaxing, and then I can focus better. I hear the gods clearer when my head is settled.” Honestly, I just wanted the hell out of the house before I said something else I would regret. I could see the others later, when I knew for certain I wouldn’t spill the beans and ruin a wedding.
“Good luck,” Kizzy said as she walked me to the door.
I hurried back to the car, my head still hurting. I waited, thinking that the voices would come back. I’d never been able to push them out before, no matter how hard I tried. They would come for me, and they wouldn’t let go again. Then it would send me into a pit that normally had me hiding under my covers until morning. I didn’t feel that weak right then, and even less when the voices didn’t come back. I wanted to know who they belonged to, and who wanted the demigods to know what was happening.
I got in the car, taking a breath to clean out my brain.
“You good?” Aster asked, closing his book.
I stared at him for a long moment, still breathing deeply. I wanted a break from all this awful god stuff. A vacation would have been great, but I didn’t think I would get a vacation ever again. I had to make do with what I had.
I hopped onto Aster without warning, straddling his lap like it was the last thing I would ever do. I kissed him the same way, giving him no warning or chance to even think. Thankfully, he seemed okay with it. His hands held my hips tightly as he kissed me back, making the bad things all leave my head.
From the backs seat, Micha cleared his throat. “Guys . . . I’m still here.”
CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE:
I Have a Bad Feeling
Aster
CALLIE AND I laid on the couch. Her father didn’t seem happy that the two of us had been lying on the couch for three hours, watching terrible movies, but it had calmed me down. Why Callie thought that forcing me to watch terrible movies would cheer me up whenever I started to have a lot of anxiety, I didn’t know. I also didn’t know why it worked when it absolutely shouldn’t have. Maybe just having someone pinning me to the couch with the intent to force affection on me did the trick. I still hadn’t gotten used to affection, or someone looking at me like I mattered.
Callie, who laid across my chest, wiggled. I looked down at her, quirking an eyebrow. “Something wrong?”
“Yeah, my butt went to sleep, all pressed up against the couch.”
Interesting thoughts filled my head, and I tried to shove them down. Unfortunately, and much to my horror, I ended up saying, “Do you need someone to . . . help you with the butt situation?”
She smiled at me. “I don’t see how you could do that.”
“I mean, you’ll never know if you don’t give me the chance to show you.”
She giggled, covering her face with her hand. “I mean, if you’re confident in yourself, I suppose you could give it a go. I’m still convinced that you won’t be able to do it, but . . . ” She shrugged. And then she wiggled her butt at me.
“Are you trying to entice me?”
“You have already been enticed,” Callie said. “I mean, if you don’t want to deliver the goods, then I suppose—”
My hand moved down to her butt, and Callie grinned at me. I patted her, smiling myself. “Well, is this helping with your numbing issue?”
“Absolutely. You should maybe squeeze just a touch?”
I did as she said. “Does that help more?”
“A little more . . . ”
“No!” her father shouted from the living room doorway. Callie leapt off me as if someone had electrocuted her and then I hit the floor a second later, galvanized by the horrified way her father stared. “I knew this would happen! I told your mother that this would happen, and she kept saying that you wouldn’t do something like that. She said that you would be smart about this, and what do I find?”
“Dad,” Callie said, squirming, her face turning a slight shade of pink. “It wasn’t that bad.”
Meanwhile, my heart had started thundering in my chest and I worked overtime to convince myself that I didn’t just get thrown out of the house. It would make perfect sense. I finally had something good in my life, and then because I couldn’t take a look around to make sure no one was watching when I touched my girlfriend’s butt, I’d lose it. That made so much sense for my life, I didn’t know how to handle it.
“Larry?” Mrs. Harold called from somewhere else in the house. “Is something wrong?”
“Yes!” he shouted.
Mrs. Harold came back into the room, her hands on her hips. “Well?”
“Your daughter was cuddling on the couch while that hooligan was groping her,” he said, gesturing to me.
“I’m not a hooligan,” I said at the same time that Callie said, “He wasn’t groping me.”
“I can barely talk to whoever answers the phone at the store when I want to know if they have a certain book in stock,” I continued. “I mean, that’s hardly hooligan behavior, if you ask me.”
“And I asked him to touch my butt,” Callie said.
Mr. Harold glared at his wife.
She touched his chest soothingly. “Honey, I know that you wanted to keep our daughter safe from the boys, but, and hear me out on this, she doesn’t need it. And I happen to agree with Aster; he’s not a hooligan.”
Did that mean she thought I was a wimp?
Mr. Harold sighed, closing his eyes. He looked up at the ceiling, as if pleading for help. Then he turned back toward me. I figured that he would punch me, and if that happened, all right. If that didn’t happen, I’d be happier, of course.
I figured I probably deserved to get punched in the face as well.
Mr. Harold stepped up to me, his arms crossed over his chest. His eyes narrowed for a moment, and then he let out a soft breath. “Dammit, my wife’s right. You aren’t a hooligan. I watched you break a glass yesterday, panic, and hide it in the bottom of the trashcan.”
My eyes widened. “You saw that?”
“You wouldn’t do anything to hurt my daughter.”
“No, I wouldn’t.”<
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“Which I’ve been telling the both of you,” Callie said, a little loudly. “But whatever, don’t listen to me.”
“I do listen,” Mrs. Harold said. “Why do you think I’ve been letting the two of you paw at each other on the couch? Because I know that you are an adult, fully capable of making her own decisions, and that Aster would have a thousand panic attacks before he ever touched you without explicit permission.”
“I didn’t mean to break the glass,” I said. “And then I didn’t know if it was a special glass. It had writing on the side and I thought that maybe it had come from some place special, then I didn’t know how to handle telling you and I thought it would be better if it disappeared. I’m sorry.”
“See,” Mrs. Harold said.
Callie frowned, crossing her arms over her chest. “Be nice to my fella.”
“I can get you a new one.”
“I don’t care about the glass,” Mr. Harold said, throwing his hands up in the air. “Lucy.” This last bit came out imploringly.
Mrs. Harold stepped forward and put her hand on my arm. “It’s okay, Aster. The glass didn’t mean anything to us to begin with. It was just one of those cheap things that you buy as a souvenir when you’re on the road and then throw out a few years later.”
“Oh, good.”
She turned to Callie then and smoothed her daughter’s curls down. “And I love you and trust you. I know that you wouldn’t do anything without thinking about it first. I’m sure Aster is a lovely boy, despite being a demigod.”
I frowned.
Callie rolled her eyes. “He is.”
“Now, I’m going to take your father out to get something to eat, so the two of you can finish watching your movies in peace.”
“I wasn’t bothering them,” Mr. Harold said.
“Is that true, Aster?”
My eyes widened. “Well, I mean . . . not really. Which isn’t to say that he wasn’t getting in the way, either. Not that I minded it, though.”