by Emma Lea
He nodded. “I left, but not to do what most people expected me to do. I wanted to find meaning for my life and I couldn’t do that as long as I still carried around the name Austin. I shed my name and the only life I’d known to find something different. And I thought I had until I came back. My father demanded my return and I thought I would use it to try and reunite my family. All I’ve ever wanted was what you had growing up. I just wanted a family who loved each other instead of treating each other like business associates and rivals.”
“So you came back to do a job you hated.”
“I did, but I came back with a plan. If I worked in the company it would soften up my father and I could somehow try and bring the broken pieces of my family, if not together, then at least closer than they were.”
“What changed your mind?”
“You,” he said.
“Me?”
“I saw what you had with your family and I realised that I would never have that. It didn’t matter what I did, I would never get the unconditional love and acceptance that your family showed to you and your sisters and cousins. So it became a choice between the man I wanted to be or the man my father wanted me to be.”
“So you didn’t do it for me,” she said, and he couldn’t tell if it was disappointment in her tone or something else.
“In a round-about way I did,” he replied. “I knew how much the job meant to you and I knew that as long as we were working together nothing could ever be right between us. The job really didn’t mean anything more to me than getting me into my father’s favour. Losing you wasn’t worth it.”
“But you’d already lost me,” she said.
“I was hoping to get you back,” he said. “Unless…”
“Unless what?”
“Unless you got back together with Ryan.”
“What?”
“I saw you, before I left. You were kissing Ryan.”
“That wasn’t Ryan and I wasn’t kissing him. He kissed me. That was Tanner my arsehole ex. He tried to get me to come back to FMR because without me there the bosses are discovering just how useless he is.”
“Does that mean you’re not with him…or anyone?”
“I’m not seeing anyone,” she said.
Zoe watched Blake absorb the news. God, he was gorgeous and when he’d touched her, the ache that had been her constant companion since the day he left, vanished. Fuck, she wanted to forgive him. She wanted to tell him that the thing he felt, she felt it too. But she was scared. She was scared of taking that final leap. What if it all turned out to be a lie? What if she walked into her new job only to find that she was back where she started with Tanner?
“What are you going to do?” she asked. “I mean, I know you don’t have to work, but if you’re not going to spend your days at Austin Industries, then what are you going to do with yourself?”
“I’ve got a job lined up,” he said. “Have you heard of The Playbook?”
Zoë rolled her eyes. The whole debacle with Willa and Jonathon was closely tied to one of the founders of the online magazine.
“I’ve heard of it,” she said.
“They offered me a job writing a travel blog with a focus on volunteer opportunities abroad.”
“So you’ll be travelling?”
“There’s some travel involved, but not as much as I did last year and not for a while. I need to get the blog established first before I take off overseas again.”
“I read your blog,” she said, and her stomach flipped over when he smiled.
“You did?”
She nodded. “I really liked it. You have a way with the written word.”
He blushed and looked down. “Thanks. None of my family read it. It means a lot to me that you did.”
“So where does that leave us?” she asked.
“Is there still a chance at an us?” Blake asked, standing and walking toward her.
She stood as well and met him half way.
“I wasn’t being honest with you before,” she whispered. He was close enough that she could feel the heat of his body even though they weren’t touching. She tilted her head back to look at him.
“Oh?” he replied. “What weren’t you honest about?”
“I feel it too,” she said. “This thing between us. I feel it too and it scares me.”
His hands rested tentatively on her waist and he pulled her a little closer so that their bodies brushed up against one another. His scent filled her nose and with every breath he took, his chest brushed hers. She could see his pulse flutter in his neck and the warmth of his hands on her set her veins on fire and made her panties go damp.
“So where does that leave us?” Blake asked, his voice rough.
“You tell me,” she replied. “What do you want, Blake?”
“I want you,” he said. “I want you in my arms, in my bed, and in my life. I want to wake up next to you and fall asleep beside you every damn day of the rest of my life.”
“Even if I’m working for your brother? Even if I spend too much time in the office and bring work home?”
“If that’s what makes you happy then I want that for you. If working at Austin Industries is what you want then I’ll do whatever I can—”
She began to pull away. “I don’t need you to—”
His hands tightened on her waist. “That’s not what I meant. If you’d let me finish I was going to say that I would do whatever I could to support you. You wouldn’t have gotten the job if you weren’t good at what you do. Your arsehole ex wouldn’t have come begging for you to go back to him unless you were a freaking market research genius. You don’t need my help to have the career you want, but what I can do is be there when you get home. I can make you put your work away so you get enough sleep at night and I can remind you to eat and drag you out of the house occasionally so you don’t forget what the sun looks like. You don’t need me to boost your career but you do need me to ensure you have balance. Let me be that for you. Let me be the person you come home to and vent to and yell at when my brother is being a prick.”
“You would do that for me? You wouldn’t get sick of my workaholic tendencies and expect me to drop everything for you?”
“I’d expect you to drop some things for me,” he said, a grin ticking up the corner of his mouth. “I’d expect you to drop your panties for me and maybe blow off work every now and then so we could run away for a dirty weekend at the beach.”
She grinned back at him, her hands going to his chest to fiddle with the buttons on his shirt. “I could do that,” she said.
“Yeah?” he asked.
She nodded. “Yeah.”
“Could I talk you into dropping your panties for me now?”
Zoë laughed. The tension that had held her rigid for the last few days melted away as he pulled her closer. “I might need some convincing,” she said, her voice breathy.
He dipped his head and took her lips in a searing kiss. The world around them exploded with loud bangs and colour flooded the room as the city around them celebrated the new year. For Zoë it was more than just a new year, it was a new beginning.
“Fireworks,” Blake said, lifting his head and sneaking a look out the window. “I knew I was a good kisser but this is a little over the top.”
She laughed and pressed up onto her toes. “How do you know they’re because of your skills and not mine?”
“Good question,” he said. “How about you kiss me again and we conduct a scientific study of the phenomenon?”
“Come here,” she said, dragging his lips back to hers.
28
If he was dreaming, he didn’t want to wake up. Zoë was in his arms and there were no more secrets between them. He couldn’t have wished for a better start to the new year.
“So about dropping those panties,” he mumbled against the soft skin of her neck.
She chuckled and trailed off into a moan as his fingers found the hem of her dress and skated up her thigh to the leg of her
panties. He caressed the crease of her hip before slipping his finger beneath the silky fabric to find her hot wet centre.
“Blake,” she breathed in his ear, rocking her sex into his hand.
“I’ve got you, Slim,” he said, capturing her lips in a deep kiss.
Sliding his hand out of her drenched folds, he tugged at her panties as he devoured her mouth and they slipped down her legs.
“Now the dress,” he mumbled against her mouth.
His hands roamed her body looking for a zip or a button or something that would finally remove the slinky fabric from her body.
“Just pull it over my head,” she said breathlessly as her hands tugged at his t-shirt.
He gripped the hem of the short dress and pulled it up revealing acres of bare skin. She was completely naked under the dress and his mouth watered. She helped him flip the dress over her head and he tossed it to the floor. He took a step back and admired her in nothing but those hard-on inducing heels. Who was he kidding? She only needed to be in his orbit to give him a hard-on.
She watched him watching her and then did a slow, sexy spin for him before bending over the desk by the wall and looking at him over her shoulder.
“Zoë,” he growled, barely able to draw in a breath at the sight before him.
“You’re wearing too many clothes,” she said.
He stripped off his t-shirt and dragged his sweats and boxers down his legs as fast as he could. He stepped up behind her and pressed his aching length against her. Their eyes caught in the mirror above the desk and he wondered how he ever got so lucky to have this woman in his life and in his hands. Her softness felt like heaven against his feverish skin and he closed his eyes, his fingers clutching her hips as he gently rocked against her. His hard length slid between the cleft of her arse and she pushed back against him.
“In me,” she said, her voice harsh with need.
He bent his knees and gripped himself at the root, angling the head into her wet entrance. He slid in slowly, savouring the feel of her. She arched her back and he watched her in the mirror as a look of satisfaction curved her sweet lips. He reached around and cupped her breast with one hand while the other one slid down her body and around to cup her sex. She closed her eyes for a moment and sighed, settling back against him, taking him deeper. She bit her lip and opened heavy eyelids to meet his gaze again and he throbbed within her. He pinched her nipple and flicked her clit, wringing a moan from her lips. He began to rock slowly into her, swirling his finger around the hard nub at her apex while he continued to worry the tip of her breast. She met each of his slow thrusts with her own, pushing him higher, demanding more from him. He wanted to take it slow, to savour this moment and tattoo it in his memory and on his heart, but she kept pushing the limits of his control.
“More, Blake,” she breathed. “I need more.”
He gave up any semblance of control and pounded into her. She clenched around him and he growled, his control slipping even more. His climax bore down on him and he doubled his efforts on her clit until finally she broke with a cry. He gripped her hips with both hands and bucked into her frantically as his orgasm gathered and his balls drew tight against his body. He plunged deep and let go, emptying himself into her and collapsing over her back. He nuzzled her neck and when her knees began to buckle, he scooped her up in his arms and carried her over to the bed.
Blake laid her down gently and slipped off her shoes before climbing into the bed beside her and pulling her against him. She snuggled under his chin and finally his heart knitted back into one piece.
“I have something for you,” Blake mumbled against her hair.
“I think you already gave it to me,” she said.
He chuckled and then rolled away from her, reaching for something in the nightstand. He rolled back. “Here,” he said. “I meant to give it to you before, but, well, things happened.”
Zoë took the Christmas wrapped box for him. “What is it?”
“It’s the Christmas present I bought you,” he said. “Open it.”
She tore the wrapping paper away and gasped when she opened the box to reveal the necklace inside.
“It’s gorgeous,” she said.
“You’re gorgeous,” he said, tugging her back down into the bed and snuggling her against his chest.
“I bought you a gift too,” she said, “but I don’t have it with me.”
“That’s okay,” he said, stifling a yawn. “We’ve got plenty of time.”
She rolled away from him and he growled in protest.
“Stop it,” she said, “I was just putting my gift on the nightstand so it doesn’t get lost.”
She snuggled back against him and he sighed as he drew her close.
“I love you Zoë,” he mumbled before drifting off into an exhausted sleep.
Zoë lay in the circle of Blake’s arms as he breathed deeply in sleep. She was exactly where she wanted to be and her heart felt too full. How was it possible that she could feel this happy and content but also eager for more?
There was still a niggle of fear, even though her world had seemed to tilt and then right itself as she and Blake had come together. She was afraid that she was going to mess up the best thing that had ever happened to her. She’d already fucked things up once with him and she didn’t want to do anything to drive him away. He thought he knew what she was like with work, but he didn’t, not really.
His hand stroked down her back and he pressed a kiss to the top of her head.
“What’s the matter, Slim?” he asked, his voice husky with sleep and sex.
She tilted her head up to him and searched his eyes. She could lie and keep this to herself, but that was what had caused them all the problems in the first place.
“I’m scared,” she said.
His brushed a kiss on her lips. “Why?” he asked.
“Because I don’t think I’m very good at this. I’m scared I’m going to do something to drive you away.”
His arms tightened around her and he breathed her in. “There are no guarantees, babe,” he said. “All I know is that I love you and being apart from you these past few days has been the worst experience of my life. I don’t want to go through that ever again so I’m very motivated to make sure neither of us find a reason to. No doubt we are going to do shit that will end up in fights and tears but if we are always honest with each other then we will find our way back to one another.”
The soft rumble of his voice was like a balm and the gentle touch of his hand as he stroked her hair eased the fears. It was then that she realised she hadn’t actually told him how she felt about him. She’d barely even acknowledged it to herself. She’d been too busy denying her feelings and denying her need for him instead of accepting the simple truth.
“I love you,” Zoë said and his hand stilled in her hair, but only for a moment. She felt the uptick of his heart as it thumped against hers and she heard him swallow thickly. She smiled against his throat, knowing he was trying to be cool so he wouldn’t scare her away and it made her love him even more.
Zoë tilted her face so she could see his eyes. “I love you, Blake Austin,” she said and with the verbal acknowledgement of her feelings, the fear melted away.
“I love you too, Zoë Farraday,” he murmured, his voice barely above a whisper.
She stretched her neck so that she could seal her lips over his. She didn’t know what the future held, but it didn’t matter as long as they could face it together.
Epilogue
“She’s coming in the door now,” Blake said into the phone. “I’ll talk to you later.”
“Tell her she’s an arsehole,” Jack said before disconnecting the call. Blake smiled at the affection in his brother’s tone.
“Your brother is an arsehole,” Zoë said before pressing up on her toes to kiss him.
“He says the same thing about you,” Blake replied with a grin.
She smirked at him. “Do I have time for a shower?”
> “A quick one. Are you packed?”
“Yep,” she called over her shoulder as she disappeared down the hall to their bedroom and the ensuite beyond. They’d been living together for a couple of months after they’d found an apartment that they could both agree on. It hadn’t been an easy search, but he had to admit that he loved their space.
It was the day before Good Friday, almost four months since Zoë had started work at Austin Industries and already she was kicking arse and taking names. Blake couldn’t be prouder of her. She’d even wormed her way into Jack’s cold heart and the two brothers were rebuilding their relationship thanks to Zoë’s persistent badgering.
It hadn’t been all unicorns and rainbows. Blake hadn’t quite understood just how much of a workaholic Zoë was, but they’d kept their promise to always be honest and Blake hadn’t shied away from telling her when she was working too much. Blake discovered that Zoë liked to fight and he discovered he really liked make-up sex, although angry sex came a close second.
Blake made his way down the hall after Zoë. He could see her in the shower and he groaned, but they didn’t have time for a quickie. They were expected at her parent’s place by seven and they were already running late because she’d stayed too late at work. It was okay though, because Blake would exact his revenge on her later that night—not that it was revenge and not that she would mind. Zoë would be a more than willing participant in making it up to him. Sometimes he wondered if she committed little transgressions just so she could apologise to him in her very special way. Blake wasn’t complaining.
He fingered the small box in his pocket. He knew it was too soon and yet it didn’t feel too soon to him. He had it all planned out. Dinner with her parents and then a moonlight walk to the spring where he would tell her just how much he loved her and how he wanted to spend the rest of his life with her.
“What are you smiling at?” she asked as she walked out of the ensuite in nothing but the towel wrapped turban style on her head.
He looked at his watch. “Just working out how much you owe me for your tardiness,” he said.
