by Tawny Weber
It wasn’t until she returned to the room that she realized exactly what her father had said.
First. “My favorite meal?”
“Roast chicken with baby potatoes, carrots and asparagus.”
Lila’s lips twitched. She was allergic to asparagus. But her heart sighed because he had all the rest right.
“Thanks, Dad,” she said with a grateful smile. She didn’t expect it to last, but this fatherly attention was pretty amazing. But second, “What do you mean, the food is waiting on the plane? We’re not leaving yet.”
“We are. The helicopter is waiting to take us to the airport. You’ll be home by nightfall. Your home or my home, whichever you’d prefer.”
He was giving her a choice?
“I want to speak to Travis before we leave. Please, I need to thank him.”
“I’m sorry, Lila, but that’s not possible.” Her father looked like he wanted to grant her anything. There was even regret in his eyes when he shook his head and led her down to the lobby.
“Of course it’s possible. He did so much for me this week. He saved me today. Besides, I have to get my luggage he stored.” And tell him she was in love with him.
“I can get myself home later this week.” Seeing his frown, she quickly added, “Or if you don’t mind waiting, I can be ready tomorrow.”
“We’re going now,” her father stated, gesturing for his security team as they entered the lobby. “You can send a thank-you note. I’ll make sure it’s delivered.”
“No.” Lila dug in her feet for the second time in the same lobby today, and let her deadweight drag him to a stop. The security circle stopped, too, surrounding them. “I’m going to see Travis.”
“He’s gone.”
“What? No.” Lila shook her head, still shifting from side to side in an attempt to see past her father’s security guards. “He wouldn’t leave without telling me goodbye.”
“Apparently, he would,” her father corrected. “He’ll handle the police report, and then he’s returning to the States with Lucas.”
Lila shook her head, refusing to believe the man she loved would choose her brother over her. A part of her wanted to think this was one of her father’s power games. But the look on his face was too honest, too sad, for her to believe that.
“Did he have a message for me?”
“He said goodbye.”
The onslaught of emotions was so heavy, Lila felt as if she were simply caving in on herself. She was too empty to even cry. She could only stare.
“It’s time to go, Lila.” He wrapped an arm around her waist to move her along. Lila didn’t have the energy to resist. “This is over. So let’s get you out of here.”
Chapter 16
Two weeks later, Travis stared at the wonder that was the Golden Gate Bridge, watching the clouds gently hug the dull, red towers. Even in the shadows of the redwoods, the sunshine was just warm enough for comfort. A light wind danced a shimmer of whitecaps over his beloved Pacific.
It wasn’t a hammock on the beach, but a perfect San Francisco day was a pretty good place to figure out what the hell to do with the rest of his life.
No, he corrected. He’d already figured out what he wanted to do. Now he would find out if he could do it.
With that in mind and one last look at the ocean beyond the grassy knoll, he headed out to see the woman who held his future in her hands.
It hadn’t been easy, but he’d been prepared to let Lila go. She’d made her feelings clear when she’d ditched him, so the least he could do was respect her choice.
Before he could change his mind, before he could beg for a chance to hold her and assure himself that she was okay, her old man had hauled her away. Smart, getting her away from the scene. Smarter, even, getting her away from him.
Even without seeing the world she’d come from, without Lucas’s questioning his intentions, he knew they had no future.
He’d done the right thing, leaving.
But maybe it’d been a jerk move, leaving without saying goodbye.
All things considered, he’d have stood by the jerk choice. Until he’d received Lila’s thank-you note.
A freaking thank-you note.
He pulled the heavy parchment note card from his pocket. The crease was worn from opening and closing it so many times, and the corners a little crushed from time in his pocket. He traced his fingers along the simple floral design and Lila’s name before flipping it open. Not to read. He’d memorized it a dozen reads ago. But to stare at Lila’s handwriting. The loopy scrawl made him ache for her.
If that’d been her purpose, she’d tucked it safely between the lines of the friendly and slightly generic words. Thank you, appreciate your time, grateful for all you did. Blah blah, freaking blah.
Did everything they’d been to each other come down to gratitude? Yeah, he’d protected her. And yeah, dammit, he might have been a little overbearing. But he’d thought there was more to their relationship than security and sex.
That’s what he was here to find out, he decided as he parked his rental on the steep hill in front of a brilliant blue house. The white wraparound porch gleamed like a tidy apron, flowerpots overflowing with colorful blooms lining the railing.
He walked up the renovated Victorian’s short staircase. The wide porch framed two doors, one a vivid purple, the other glossy maple.
He knew Lila, so he went for the glossy maple. With a single deep breath, he steeled his shoulders and knocked.
Someone else answered.
“Hi, there,” a redhead said, giving him a thorough once-over. “What can I do for you?”
“I’m looking for Lila Adrian.”
The redhead gave him a longer study now, the interest in her eyes shifting to suspicion. Given the evident mistrust, she surprised him by stepping back and pulling the door open wide.
“Please, come in.” She gestured with the grace of a queen welcoming a peasant to her castle. And never took her eyes off him as she led the way down a narrow hallway.
“You’re the Super SEAL, aren’t you?”
“I’m Travis Hawkins,” he corrected, looking around the living area.
“She’s due back any minute now.” The redhead pushed her long swing of hair behind her ear and sent him a flirty look. “Want a glass of wine while you wait?”
“No. Thanks.”
That didn’t stop red. She poured and she talked. By the time she’d filled a goblet-size wineglass, he knew her name was Corinne, that she’d lived with Lila off and on for the last two years, eight months. Her father was a banker and her mother a distant relation to the Dutch royal family. She liked sunsets, baby roses and U2, and thought Lila should give him a chance because he was obviously a nice guy.
How she figured that last part was baffling, since he hadn’t said more than ten words since they’d met. He had the feeling her explanation could take hours.
Thankfully, the sound of the front door stopped him from asking.
Lila on the phone; her voice ricocheted around the hallway so that her chatter entered the room before she did. She said her goodbye as she stepped into the living room, but stopped with her phone halfway into her bag to stare.
Dressed more formally than he’d seen before, her chocolate-hued skirt hugged from hip to knee. Paired with a fitted jacket in the same shade, the austere look was softened by the creamy lace blouse that dipped just low enough to hint at cleavage. From the top of her hair, slicked back in a glossy roll, to the pointed tips of her five-inch pumps, her appearance screamed kick-ass professional.
This must be the Lila-does-business look, he realized. Confident, assured and proficient. It suited her. She was so damned beautiful. Even wearing a shuttered expression and looking like she wanted to turn around and head right back out the door, she was the most beautiful sight he’d ever seen.
/> “Hello, Lila,” he greeted when she was silent.
“Look who stopped by. He just, you know, came to the door. I offered him wine but he said no. I’ll put together a cheese plate. Maybe he’d want that?”
“Corinne.” A quick look sent her friend into silence as the woman scurried out with her wine sloshing dangerously close to the top of the glass. Lila stood just inside the room, watching him without expression until they heard a door slam. Then she strode over to the couch. She didn’t sit, but she did set her leather bag—he recognized it as her laptop case—on the couch before crossing her arms over her chest.
“This is a surprise,” she finally said. “I didn’t expect to see you again. Ever.”
“I had to take care of a few things—” he started to say. Before he finished, though, she waved a hand in the air as if erasing his words.
“No explanations necessary. I ran out on you against your express orders. Doing so not only put me in danger, but also endangered numerous others in the rescue.” She said it all so matter-of-factly, as if reading a cost report. “It’s only fair that you walked out on me in return.”
“It wasn’t like I was keeping score and walked out as payback,” he snapped. The look in her eyes told him she’d thought he’d done just that.
Anger burned away some of the guilt he’d been carrying as Travis strode forward. She angled behind the couch before he could touch her, telling him just how deep her mistrust for him went. Seeing firsthand how badly he’d hurt her, Travis clenched his fists, focusing all his frustration in his fingers. Squeezed it away. It wasn’t until he saw Lila doing the same on the back of the couch that he realized that he’d picked up the habit from her.
“I found my new career,” he heard himself say as if it were a confession. “It’ll offer the same challenges I excelled at in the navy. But other than the occasional assignment, I’ll live stateside instead of being deployed all over the world. And it pays a hell of a lot better than the military.”
“What’ll you be doing?”
“As of yesterday, I’m an operative for Aegis Global Security.”
He tensed, waiting for her reaction.
“What’s that?”
Travis frowned. That definitely wasn’t the reaction he’d expected.
“A firm that offers protection in every form. Global, cyber, physical security, all provided by elite former Special Forces personnel. It’s an impressive setup. Military protection for prominent civilians in jeopardy.”
“It sounds like the perfect job for you.” Shrugging off her jacket, Lila folded it over the back of the couch. “The company must consider itself lucky.”
“Actually, the company belongs to Lucas. I thought you’d know that.”
“Lucas, my brother?” She shook off the surprise with a roll of her eyes. “Why would I know that? Other than the occasional family dinner, I’ve had minimal contact with him in the last five years. Like you, he’s Mr. Super SEAL. Out saving the world and ignoring the people who lo—” She bit her lip, then finished, “Know you.”
She cleared her throat and started over.
“You’re going to work with my brother?”
Since she said it in the same tone someone would use to ask if he was going to work in a puppy-killing factory, he hesitated.
“Work for,” he finally corrected. “He’s launching this security firm and wants me on board.”
“And you came here to tell me that?”
Damn, the woman could be a hard-ass when she wanted to. He had to admire that.
“That’s part of it. But mostly I came here to ask you to give us a chance,” he confessed with about as much charm as a shy schoolboy. “What we have, it’s special. I want to see how far we can take it.”
For a second, hope lit in those mermaid eyes. Then she pressed her lips together and found her attitude again.
“What we had was sex.”
“We had incredible sex,” he agreed. “But that’s not all there is between us. I think we owe it to each other to see where those feelings take us. See what we can build out of them.”
“You don’t mean that.” She looked scared. More scared than she’d looked when that whack job bartender had pointed a gun at her head. Then she blinked as if an idea had suddenly occurred to her. “If you feel that way, why’d you wait so long to tell me?”
“First, because I had to finish the mission. I took down Garcia, closed down the money laundering ring and nailed the coffin shut on the criminals. Second, I figured you’d had enough stress—and you were pretty pissed at me—so I thought I’d give you some space to decompress.”
“And third?” she asked when he hesitated.
“Third, I wanted to be able to offer you more than a beach-bum lifestyle. Hence, the new career.” He studied her expression, but for the first time since they’d met, he couldn’t read her. “What do you say?”
“What if I said yes, I’d like to see what kind of future we can build together? That I’m very interested and have strong feelings for you? But that I can’t feel right being with you if you take this job or, better yet, if you have anything to do with my brother?”
It was like taking a hard, swift kick to the nuts. Mind-numbingly painful in a way that had stars exploding in his head and left him feeling bruised and nauseous.
But like any pain, Travis took one long breath and pushed right through it. And considered. It took only a few seconds.
An incredible career, one that not only fulfilled him but one that utilized the skills he was so proud of. A chance to live the rest of his life with a sense of accomplishment, to help keep others safe and to excel in his chosen field.
Or Lila.
He stepped around the couch and took her hand, grateful that she didn’t try to get away again. His gaze roamed the face he’d spent every night for the last two weeks dreaming about. Those lush, full lips and sea witch eyes tempted, and his fingers itched to skim the ivory of her cheek before diving into the rich silver-gold of her hair to loosen that severe hairstyle.
Her scent filled his lungs, a teasing reminder of watching her in the moonlight. Of holding her close as they slept, her hair wrapping around him like silk. Of making love with her, watching her eyes blur with passion as she went over the edge of pleasure.
They’d laughed together. They’d talked for hours, about everything under the sun. They’d discovered hundreds of things they agreed on and had enjoyed the ones they’d debated.
They fit.
And most of all, she made him feel whole.
“You say the word,” he told her, lifting her fingers to his lips. “And I’ll quit.”
* * *
Damn the man.
Lila pulled her hand free.
“If Lucas is engineering it, it’ll be a huge success. You’d be crazy not to take his offer.”
“I’d be crazy not to do anything and everything possible to make things work between you and I,” he countered. “That’s my priority.”
Lila wanted to believe him. She wanted to reach out and grab ahold of everything he meant to her, whether he was offering it or not.
But she’d tried that once already.
And when he’d done nothing more than be true to who he was, she’d run away. Because despite her oh-so-wise advice and heartfelt encouragement, she hadn’t let herself see who he really was.
Then he’d left.
Just left her with the aftermath of her own stupid mistake.
She wouldn’t—couldn’t—make that same mistake a second time.
“You have to make yourself happy first,” she said aloud. “You have to find that something—whether it’s with the military again, this job with Lucas, or even if it’s just swinging in another hammock.”
She couldn’t be responsible for his happiness. Just like he couldn’t carry the weight of
hers.
“I’m not going to settle for anything less than being as happy with my work as you are with yours.” He tapped his fingers on the strap of her laptop case. “For a while on that beach, I thought I could. But you reminded me of how important it is to love what you do.”
“And you’ll love working with my brother?”
“It’ll require travel and irregular hours, dedication and training. Your brother is a demanding kind of guy, and he’s damned ambitious with this plan to make Aegis kick ass. He respects my skills, and while he acknowledges my injury, he doesn’t see it as an issue. Aegis is based in San Diego, but their operatives live wherever they want. Which means I could move anywhere. Even San Francisco. So, yeah. It’s a job I’m going to really get into.”
“I’m happy for you,” she said truthfully, giving his hand a squeeze before saying again, “It really does sound like the perfect job for you.”
“It is. But our relationship is still my priority.”
Lila bit her lip, wanting to believe him. He read her doubts as easily as if they were written on her face.
“I know I should say that I’ll never issue orders again, but I’d be lying. It’s too deeply ingrained for me to not take charge when I see a situation going south.”
Watching her face intently, he slowly reached out to take her hand. Everything inside her seemed to sigh at his touch.
“But I can promise that any orders I issue are never because I don’t respect or doubt you. And I promise to listen better, and to always factor in your opinion, your wants and your needs.”
Seeing the doubt in her eyes, he lifted her hand to his lips again and brushed a heart-meltingly soft kiss over her knuckles. His gaze locked on hers, he murmured again, “I promise.”
Lila had spent a lifetime surrounded by powerful alpha men. She’d thought she knew what to expect from one. But Travis’s words were like an explosion, blowing away all of her preconceived concepts and leaving the world wide open.
All she had to do was step into the possibilities.
