“Funny way of showing it this last year.” His tone was biting and even he winced at the nastiness. He didn’t want to argue with her anymore. He just wanted to be left alone to lick his wounds.
This time he did hit the wall switch and the room went from bright to dim in a split second. He needed the cover of shadows, not wanting her to see how much she still affected him.
“I’ve apologized for that. I had to grow up and learn to stand on my own two feet. I couldn’t come back to you and let you take care of me like my parents did. It wouldn’t be fair to you, or me. I came as soon as I could. I can be a real partner to you now.”
His gaze raked over her, righteous anger churning in his stomach. She just didn’t get it. “I told you I’m not interested. Unless you’re in the mood to fuck. I wouldn’t turn that down.”
Alyssa was wearing one of his T-shirts that hugged her breasts and showed off the tan flesh of her thighs. He hated himself for wanting her and her for making him feel this way.
Indecision crossed her features and she leaned forward, pulling her knees up to her chest. “Are you drunk?” she asked in the same tone she’d asked him to pass the salt at dinner earlier.
“I’ve been drinking but I’m not drunk. And no, before you ask, I didn’t drive home. Tom drove me.”
“Tom.” Alyssa grimaced at the name. She’d never been his biggest fan. “I hope you had a good time tonight showing me just how little I mean to you. Do you feel better now?”
Not really.
Hank popped the button on his shirt, pretending she hadn’t asked him a question. “Do you want to fuck or not, woman?”
Her green eyes were dark and she was either going to kick him in the balls or pull him down on the bed. Time seemed to stand still and he held his breath waiting for the verdict, hating that it meant so much to him.
“Get over here, Deputy. I’ve missed you.”
Able to breathe again, he ripped at the snaps and pulled the fabric down his arms. “This doesn’t mean we’re back together, Lis. It’s just means I’ve got an itch you can scratch.”
His sexy as hell wife got up on her knees on the mattress and pulled his shirt over her head, revealing a body he’d dreamt about every goddamn night for the last year.
“If I thought you meant that I’d pack my bags and find a lawyer. Shut up and kiss me.”
Tired of the verbal fencing, he unbuckled his belt. “You don’t give the orders in this bedroom, my sweet Lis. I do. You want to show me how sorry you are? Shuck those panties and get down here and get busy. You know what I want.”
Hank pointed to the rug at his feet, waiting for her to tell him to go to hell. He was being a jerk but he couldn’t seem to stop himself. He had too much anger and hurt inside to treat her gently tonight. If she wanted this, she had to take him the way she’d made him.
Pissed the fuck off.
Tonight would be fast, rough, and hot. Tomorrow she would leave him in disgust which was just as well. Maybe he could find some peace in finally fucking away Alyssa’s memory.
* * * *
He was trying to push her away again. Acting like he didn’t give a shit about her when she knew better. He thought if he wasn’t tender and romantic she’d walk away. He was completely wrong, and she would show him.
Alyssa loved him, and that meant she loved all of him. He’d always tried to make sex so romantic and tender, hiding a rougher side of himself. While they’d been apart she’d done plenty of reading and she’d learned that sometimes men just wanted to fuck. The thought of Hank wanting her so badly he could barely control himself didn’t turn her off. It turned her on and made her hot. She wanted to inspire a deep passion like that in her husband.
The last damn thing she wanted was perfunctory, by the numbers sex with the man she loved. She wanted to be taken and ravished like in the stories she’d read. But maybe they were only make-believe.
His heated gaze ran up and down her now naked body as she settled at his feet on her knees. Looking at her like he could eat her up, she trembled, glad she had him to hold onto. Her hands were braced against his denim covered thighs and she could see the impressive bulge behind his zipper.
She rubbed her cheek against his hard cock, feeling it jump even through the thick fabric. He might not like her very much at the moment but he wanted her. It was a start, hopefully a fresh one.
Her shaking fingers pulled down his zipper and tugged at his pants until he kicked them away. His cock slapped against his belly and she licked her lips in preparation. He was long and thick and he stretched her jaws wide. In the past she’d avoided this particular intimacy, not wanting to reveal her inexperience in this department. This time she was determined to make him weak in the knees, if not from her technique then at least her enthusiasm.
Alyssa ran her tongue from the base to the mushroom-shaped head, then down and up again. She heard his swiftly indrawn breath and his hand tangled in her long hair tugging her closer.
“Don’t fucking tease me, Lis. I’m on the fucking edge here.”
His voice sounded like ground glass and his breath was tortured and ragged. Swallowing him down as quickly as she could, she tightened her lips around his cock and flitted her tongue from side to side.
His groan seemed to come from somewhere deep inside of him and a rush of triumph ran through her at his reaction. She grasped the base of his dick with her hands and quickened her efforts, humming with appreciation of the weight of his cock pressing down on her tongue.
His fingers tightened in her hair and he pushed his cock deeper until it hit the back of her throat, choking her ever so slightly.
“You like my cock, sweet? Suck me hard. Use that tongue.”
Her eyes watered and her jaw ached but she wouldn’t give in. He was trying to make her stop and run. Instead she adjusted her head and relaxed her jaw, taking him even deeper. A string of words that would have made a sailor blush fell from his lips and his cock seemed to swell and throb in her mouth. Hot jets of his seed shot to the back of her throat and she had to swallow quickly to keep from gagging. He had a decidedly salty and musky flavor that wasn’t unpleasant but would take some getting used to.
When he was done, his hand fell away from the back of her head and she sat back on her heels, wondering what he would do now. Would he throw her on to the bed or retreat after he’d shown how affected he was?
He didn’t make her wait long for the decision. Lifting her from the floor he set her on her feet and began to advance forward, forcing her to walk backwards. Her legs hit the mattress and she tumbled onto the bed as he still stalked her, coming down to her. His lips twisted into something close to a smile.
“You must really be sorry to suck my cock and swallow like that, Lis.” He leaned forward so his lips were right next to her ear and his voice dropped to a whisper. “You can fuck me twelve times a day, my sweet. It isn’t going to make any difference.”
Alyssa shook her head, rejecting the words. She wouldn’t give up trying to win back his love.
“I love you, Hank.” She’d keep saying it until he believed it.
“Words don’t mean a thing. Actions do.”
She certainly hoped so. His words told her to leave, but his body said something quite different.
His head dipped down and captured a nipple in his mouth, rolling it between his lips and nipping it hard with his teeth. She moaned as he tortured first one and then the other, not bothering to be gentle.
Pressing her thighs together, she tried to control the tidal wave of arousal that was building inside of her. Hank thought he was being cruel but the meanest thing he’d ever done was never make love to her like this. It was as if he wanted to consume her very soul and she wondered how she’d lived this long without experiencing it.
Hank grinned wickedly in the dim light. “Like that, do you? Or are you pretending? Do you want more or do you want me to stop? One word, Lis, and I’ll walk out of this room.”
She’d rather die than hav
e him stop now. Her body was on fire, every muscle tightening as she moved closer to orgasm.
“More,” she whispered. “Please, Hank, more.”
He quirked an eyebrow but didn’t deny her. His lips and teeth nipped and pulled at her tight nubs then traveled to her neck and shoulders. She’d have marks tomorrow from this but she didn’t care. She craved this possession from him, needed it more than her next breath.
Hank moved down her body and pushed her thighs further apart to make room for his wide shoulders. Alyssa started to shake the minute she realized his intentions. He was going to lick her pussy and it never ceased to make her feel vulnerable.
But then she wasn’t hiding anything at the moment anyway. He knew exactly what he did to her when his mouth was performing such an intimate act. He’d be firmly in control of this entire encounter.
At the first touch of his tongue, her mind short-circuited. A wave of heat swept over her and her toes curled as he tortured her swollen clit. She was on the edge of climax at once, her body quivering and her hands clutching at the sheets.
Control is way overrated.
Hank kept her on the edge but never gave her enough to go over. Her head thrashed back and forth and she mewled in frustration each time he pulled away or changed up the rhythm.
“I want to hear you beg to come, Lis. Beg me and maybe I’ll let you.”
His hot breath blew over the sensitized nub and she groaned in protest, knowing he was resolute. This was part of her punishment, apparently. She had to take it so they could get past the hurt.
She licked her dry lips and took a deep breath. “Please, Hank. Please let me come.”
She didn’t care about the begging and pleading, only caring that he felt vindicated when she did. For a moment she thought he might still deny her but instead he closed his mouth over her clit giving her just the right amount of pressure.
Stars exploded behind her eyelids and she heard herself cry out his name at one point. Sweet sensations poured through her as if a dam had broken and she let it overtake all her senses.
Control is way overrated.
She barely had a chance to catch her breath and Hank was inside of her. Riding her fast and hard, he pounded her into the mattress. Wrapping her legs around his lean waist, she dug her nails into his shoulders. Her cowboy deputy was fucking her relentlessly, ruthlessly and she loved every minute of it.
Every deep thrust of his cock rubbed against her already sensitive button and it was only a matter of time before she fell again. Sweat covered his body and his gaze never left her face as he pistoned in and out of her, his expression stripped of the neatly controlled mask he’d worn all day. His emotions were naked and on display and the love and passion she saw in his eyes gave her hope to see this through. There was anger there too, but it was at least an honest emotion. Pretending he didn’t give a damn was the lie.
Her hands glided down his back and she grasped his muscled haunches, wanting him to fuck her deeper and harder.
“More, Hank. I need more,” she said urgently, so close to the precipice.
He groaned and buried his face in her neck, whispering her name over and over again while he thrust harder and faster until they both shattered into a million pieces.
“Lis. God, Lis,” he moaned against her skin, sending shivers through her already quivering form.
White lights flashed and waves of pleasure battered her already shaky defenses. She wasn’t just Hank’s wife any longer. She was his mate, and he was the other half of her heart and soul. There was no way she could go on without him after he’d branded her tonight. She belonged to him completely.
He rolled away, his breathing ragged and she sucked air into her own starved lungs. Love for this man overwhelmed her and she curled her body into his, feeling sated and peaceful for the first time in a long time.
Tonight she was the victor, but she had no doubt by morning Hank would have rebuilt the fortress around his heart. This was only one battle. There was still a war.
Chapter Four
Hank kept his eyes trained on the scrambled eggs, bacon, and toast Alyssa had placed in front of him. After the way he’d behaved last night, he wasn’t sure he could ever look her in the eye again. No matter what she’d done, she was still his wife and as such deserved his respect. He’d treated her like a whore last night and he wasn’t very proud of himself. She deserved an apology and a chance to tell him off.
For a moment his chest clenched in fear that she might leave. The whole idea had been to disgust her to such an extent that she would go but now that he might have succeeded he wasn’t near as happy about it as he thought he would be.
Fuck.
Luke blew into his straw making bubbles in his chocolate milk. Hershey was sitting patiently at his feet hoping the soon to be six year old would drop a piece of bacon. Alyssa was warming up both their coffees before taking a seat between Luke and Hank.
“We don’t blow bubbles in our milk, sweetie.” Alyssa moved the cup a few inches back but Luke just laughed.
“I do, Mom. I can blow them even bigger. Watch!” Luke reached for the cup again but Alyssa pinched the straw from the glass.
“Maybe I should have said it differently. You aren’t going to blow bubbles in your milk. But I love you. Now finish your toast.” With her sunny smile, their homey domestic scene seemed a far cry from the night before.
He was also impressed by how easily she handled any shenanigans from Luke. In the most loving but firm way possible, she’d stop the monkeyshines and redirect their rambunctious son into more orderly activities.
It was certainly different than how she’d dealt with Luke’s chronic colic or his climbing phase when he was two and a half. Then she’d seemed unsure of herself, almost tentative. He was starting to feel decidedly unneeded. She’d had herself up, showered and dressed along with an ornery Luke before Hank woke up.
Luke pushed his plate away after slipping the last of his bacon to Hershey. “I’m full. Can I take Hershey for a walk? Please, Mom?”
She surprised him when she turned to him and placed her hand on his arm. His pulse jumped to life and he was forced to look her in the eyes for the first time that day. There wasn’t any anger or animosity. If anything, they were calm and cool.
“How about you take Hershey and play with him in the backyard? Just stay in the fence. We can take him for a walk in a little while.”
“Okay,” Luke agreed cheerfully. “How long is a little while?”
His son was certainly smart.
Alyssa laughed and stood to clear the table. “Half an hour. Deal?”
“Deal.” Luke scampered outside with a barking puppy at his heels.
The silence stretched as Alyssa unloaded the dishwasher from last night and Hank picked at his eggs. He needed to man up and get it over with.
“Do you feel like grilling out tonight? We’ve got chicken–”
“Listen,” he cut in. “I’m sorry, okay? I acted like an ass last night and I apologize. I hope we can put this behind us. You were right when you said we need to do better for Luke.”
Alyssa picked up a dishtowel and wiped off her hands. “Your apology is accepted although I’m not sure what you’re sorry for. Drinking? Having sex? Just what do you think you did wrong, Hank?”
That was an answer he hadn’t expected. She was full of surprises this morning. “For both, I guess. Going to the bar was dumb and well—later—I shouldn’t have done that, Lis. I’m sorry.”
He was studying his eggs again feeling like ten kinds of shit. He also didn’t like that he had lost the moral high ground he’d had yesterday.
“Look at me, Hank.” Lifting his head, their gazes locked. “I’m not sorry we had sex. I’m glad we did. It had been way too long, don’t you think?”
“You’re….glad? But I was so…”
“Dominant? Demanding? Alpha?” A smile played on his beautiful wife’s lips. She didn’t look upset in the least. She looked…glowing.
&nb
sp; Hank’s lips twisted and his face flushed. “I was going to say I acted like a jerk. I’m sorry I was so rough.”
“Don’t be. I liked it. It was exciting.” Now her cheeks were pink but her eyes were sparkling.
“You liked it?” He sounded like an idiot just parroting back everything she said. “You’ve never–”
“Stop right there, my husband.” Alyssa raised her hand. “You’ve never either. You’ve been holding out on me as far as I’m concerned. I’m going to want it like that all the time, just so you know.”
“You’re my wife.” Hank shook his head in disbelief in what he was hearing. She wanted him to be rough and dominant with her?
“I’m glad we finally agree on that. We’ve made progress,” she replied. “Don’t go all good girl bad girl on me. I’m a woman and last night was wonderful.”
“Just because we had sex last night doesn’t mean everything is all better,” Hank argued, realizing she’d cornered him handily. “Nothing has changed.”
That wasn’t really true actually, but he wasn’t about to give in at this point. He was still vulnerable where she was concerned and he didn’t want to come out of this with another broken heart. It appeared that she’d changed but anyone could act differently for twenty-four hours.
“Well, a few things have.” She looked like she was trying not to laugh. “For one, last night was amazing. I felt close to you for the first time in a long time. And second, we didn’t use any protection. Again.”
Hank slapped the heel of his hand on his forehead. He hadn’t used anything last night, hadn’t even crossed his mind. His cock had done all the thinking. This was what had gotten them into trouble the last time. Alyssa had been pregnant when they’d married.
“Is it a dangerous time of the month?” He had to consciously take deep breaths to keep from hyperventilating. His marriage was in shambles and he might have made things worse by bringing another innocent into the middle of it.
Hank Page 3
