HOW DO WE understand the wonderful and wretched things that happen to us in life? Are we aware of how much these things mark us and mold us into who we are? There is an enormous cost to our spirit and psyche when evil touches us… Doesn’t God love us? Why doesn’t He protect us? Or does He? Isn’t His hand in it somewhere? It must be, if he’s a personal God. But why does it seem that there are those in life that are blessed, while others suffer so… or do we all suffer to one degree or another, because of evil? Are we not all God’s children? He isn’t indifferent, is He?
No… He can’t be. That is not who He is. The Bible tells us that God is love, not that He wants to love, but that love is what He is.
Then why are there things like death, injustice and misery in this world? Can’t God prevent them? Or does He have a reason for staying His hand? Surely when sin entered this world it brought those things with it, but why does God allow it? Is He testing us?
He is also light, the Bible tells us, yet do we understand what that light really is, as we see it through the dark lens of this fallen world?
And if we really look, can’t we see He is trying to rescue as many of us as He can. Why do we run from Him? Why is He the last resort for some of us, when we are so desperate, so hurt, and at the end of our ropes? We make up gods of our own, instead of knowing the one and only God, Jehovah. It’s unbelievable that so few of us want to be rescued. We try everything, but God to make us happy.
And death… how do we face that? It seems so final when we are on this side of heaven. Our spirits grieve over it. Yet if we could see it from heaven’s point of view… a life coming to be with God, it wouldn’t seem so painful and final, would it? Why is it then, when the same event happens to two people, they don’t react in the same way? When a child dies, do we not grieve? Yet some respond by hating God, while others draw closer to Him for solace?
Is it wisdom, faith, love… or maybe all of them woven together that allows us to be comforted? Surely it’s something like that.
I guess the biggest question to ask is, do we love God for what He can do for us, or do we love Him because He is God?
Shelly sighed. Many deep and troubling thoughts swirled around her as she sat in the Boeing 737, her head resting against the seat as she peered out the portal of a jetliner high in the air. Rain splattered against the window as it fell on its way to the earth below. The drone of the engines encompassed her.
She didn’t have the answers to the questions floating around in her soul, but she wanted to discover them. She wanted to understand God and to know Him more intimately.
Her memories of Kenya and its decimation had sparked these issues afflicting her spirit. She marveled at how unreliable life seemed. How could she not think that, after witnessing so much fear, violence and tragedy in that war ravaged country? Now, she knew how truly frail life is.
Man and his lack of a connection to the real God of the universe had caused the war. Though she was grateful she had a deeper faith through that experience, committing herself to God’s narrow way of life, the horror of so much death, destruction and evil would haunt her for the rest of her life. How could it not? For that experience had etched another facet into the person known as Shelly Elizabeth Ferguson. How she reacted to it was up to her and she had chosen to draw closer to God.
The jetliner dipped its wings and slid slowly downward, descending through the rain soaked clouds to the Spokane International Airport below. Shelly watched their descent through the gray mist, observing the dimly lit farm lands and homes slowly glide past. She was coming home to an uncertain future with Tom and Faith. And she missed Jim. He wasn’t there beside her to comfort her.
His absence left a void, but not like the fear and loss she had experience in Africa when he was missing, for she knew where he was. She knew it was temporary. She knew he needed to stay, yet his absence was sorely felt. Jim was with the children’s grandmother. Shelly closed her eyes and recalled the events of the past few days.
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A Tale Of Choice Page 23
