by B. Celeste
But they can’t. I know my family. They’re hard-headed and stubborn just like me. They won’t accept that there’s nothing to be done and will try figuring out something to do despite my insistence otherwise. Their involvement will only feed a fire that has grown out of control already.
Knowing I can’t keep evading his questions, I do my best to give him what he wants without feeling like it’s tearing me apart. I fail though because shards of invisible glass cut into my skin with every second I hold back the truth. “Do you want me to tell you I screwed up, Gavin?”
He remains silent.
I take a deep breath. “Would it make you feel better to know that you were right this entire time? Congratulations, big brother. Every single warning you gave me since you suspected something was going on with Corbin back in high school came true. He left. He broke me. I tried to move on and failed. And then we…” He makes a noise when I pause. “And then I fell back into old habits. Happy now?”
But I know Gavin. He’s not happy. How could he be? He’s one of the few people who made it seem like what I do is impressive. His wife tells me that he brags to people about my books when he’s out, not that he ever admits it.
His laugh is dry. “He’s married.”
“You don’t think I know that?” My voice breaks as tears cling to my eyes. “I’m sure you think that I’m stupid. I think I am too. But whether either of us likes it or not, I made a bad decision because I was never really over him.”
I keep telling myself that there’s no such thing as a failed relationship because each one has a lesson to teach. But what has Corbin taught me other than how to be cautious?
“What about Parker?”
Somehow I manage to roll my eyes. I ask myself about my ex-fiancé all the time. “You mean the man who ended our engagement right before the wedding? He knew that I wasn’t in it like I should have been and was smart enough to bow out before it was too late.”
My eyes widen. He’s my Ian.
Subconsciously I’ve always known. Maybe I even played into the role of Beck when I agreed to go out with him the first time. The biggest difference is that the character I wrote Ian to be was compassionate enough to let Beck be with the man she really loved. That kind of response is fictional—a fantasy that we want to believe in, so our actions make us less like a bad guy and more humane.
But I was the bad guy to Parker. From the day I met him at Jamie’s office when I was seventeen, our fate was sealed. Whether I admitted it or not, I chose somebody other than him no matter how hard I tried making it work. He was simply the man I settled with to lessen the likelihood of getting hurt again. And while I loved Parker Jennings in a lot of ways, I loved Corbin Callum more.
To my surprise, Gavin’s voice isn’t as jagged when he speaks again. “It’s been years, Kinley. You can’t honestly tell me that you’re not over him.”
“Maybe I’m not supposed to be.”
“He moved on,” he points out gingerly.
My lips tremble. “But did he?”
He sighs heavily, grumbling under his breath. “I saw this coming from a mile away, but you’re too stubborn to listen. Why do you put yourself in these situations?”
I rub the side of my face, feeling a headache form in my temples. “Please don’t do this right now.”
“Then what am I supposed to say?” he doubts, irritation evident in his words.
“That it’ll be okay.”
“Someday,” he agrees. “Someday people can move on from this, but you’re a public figure. How many times have you told me that since you started making a name for yourself? Since you got a fanbase? People watch what you do, and they definitely watch him. The two of you…” A string of curse words flies from his mouth. “The two of you doing something as stupid as rekindling some flame that died years ago was reckless. What did you think would happen?”
The burn in my chest intensifies. My hand goes to my stomach. “I don’t know. I guess we were trapped in our own little world for a while.”
“I love you, Kin.” His sincerity gives me a little hope, but I know it’s only a microscopic step for us. “I just wish you would have listened to me back then so this could have been avoided.”
“I wouldn’t even be here,” I remind him, knowing damn well that he realizes who the book is about. He told me not to bother giving Jamie the story when I admitted how much of my past was tied to the plot. Mom told him it’d be good for me to get my feelings on paper, but I don’t think she realized how far I’d take it. Jamie encouraged me to write a story worth telling, and I bled my soul onto each page of inked paper for the world to pick apart.
Pulling the plug on the movie would have been easier, but I don’t think it would have been worth it. I know having a production as big as this one connected to my name will increase the sales and be the best thing that’s happened to me. But I also know that it can ruin me in a heartbeat since I became the epitome of Beck.
I’m my own puppeteer pulling the strings.
And I got tangled.
I bite on my jagged nail, remembering something that Corbin told me a while ago. “Hey, Gavin? Did you and Corbin ever talk one on one? Like maybe after he left?”
The chances of him answering are slim since he probably doesn’t want to discuss Corbin any more than I do. But I held off asking when Corbin insisted because I was afraid of what he’d say. I pretended like I didn’t care when it secretly ate at the back of my mind. I wanted to live in a fantasy world with Corbin without our bubble popping. But now? It imploded.
“What did he tell you?” he asks distantly.
I blink. “To ask you.” When Gavin doesn’t say anything, I begin to sweat. “Gavin, what happened? He said he went back to Lincoln to talk to me, but nobody said anything to me about it. Wouldn’t I know?”
I hold my breath as my brother cusses again, leaving prickles of worry needling the back of my head. “I was just looking out for you.”
“What?” I swallow, feeling the possibilities dredge me with fear.
“He’d been gone for a few months and there was some shit online about him being with one of his co-stars during some promotional tour for that movie you got him in,” he begins reluctantly. “Honestly, the pictures seemed pretty believable. Christ, he was holding her hand in one! It pissed me off, okay? When I saw him at the gas station I lashed out. He had no right coming back when he made a big deal out of leaving everything behind.”
“He came back,” I repeat.
It’s not a question.
He came back.
He murmurs, “Yeah. He did.”
I shake my head at this information. Corbin told me as much already, but I wasn’t sure I believed him. When he made it sound like everyone in Lincoln knew about it, I thought it was pettiness talking. He made it seem like they chose me over him.
“What did you do?”
“Listen—”
“What the hell did you do, Gavin?” I growl, sitting straighter. Penny jumps off the desk and scurries from the room, and probably for the better.
“I hit him, okay?”
I draw back.
He doesn’t stop there. “He said he wanted to talk to you and asked if you were home. It was one of the few days you weren’t locked in your room on your fucking laptop typing your goddamn memoir all about the asshole. Mom had texted me saying you’d gone with Zach to some event out of town, and I didn’t want Corbin messing that up. I knew if he found out where you were, you’d just forgive him and pretend you’ve been fine since he left.”
My eye twitches. “What. Did. You. Do?”
He blasts, “For fucks sake. I told him that it was too late for him because you were with Zach. Are you happy now?”
My lips part as I suck in a sharp breath and hold it. I try making excuses, like I misheard him somehow. Yet, I know better. I heard him just fine, and a new form of hurt plows into me.
Nostrils flaring, I grip the phone until my fingers hurt. “How could you do th
at to me? You knew how much I loved him! You said—”
“I was looking out for you!”
“You’re such a fucking asshole!” I yell, standing up and tossing the box of posters off the desk until they scatter across my office floor. “I cannot believe you’d do something so selfish. Just because you got hurt by Aimee doesn’t mean everyone else’s relationship is doomed!”
“That’s not fair.”
A dry laugh bursts from my lips. “What isn’t fair is you deciding what’s best for me. Do you know that we could have had a chance if you didn’t meddle? You probably don’t even care that you screwed everything up, do you?”
“No, okay? I don’t feel bad.”
I throw my free hand up. “I don’t even want to talk to you right now. You have no idea what you did.”
“What I did? I helped—”
“I’m pregnant, Gavin.”
Complete silence.
Sniffing back big, fat ugly tears, I force myself to add, “You’re no different than him, you know. Why do you guys think it’s okay to make choices for other people? I’ve always had a right to decide what’s best for me, and you took that away until I crumbled. Big brothers aren’t supposed to do that.”
“Kinley…” He sounds as broken as I am.
“I don’t want to talk to you anymore.”
“Kinley, stop. Are you really—”
I hang up on him.
He calls again.
We repeat that twice more before I do what I’ve only ever done with Corbin. I block his number and look down at the silver eyes staring back at me from the ground.
I kneel and pick up one of the fallen posters, noticing the damage inflicted from throwing the box down. It’s almost symbolic that there’s a wrinkle splitting Corbin and Olivia. My thumb caresses the blemish as I rest on my knees, staring at the posters everywhere.
My phone buzzes beside me, causing me to glance down at the news alert. I know I shouldn’t look, but I do. When I see Lena Dasani’s name in bold lettering, I let the poster fall from the others.
Lena Dasani speaks out amidst rumors of husband’s infidelity.
I tell myself not to click it.
My thumb doesn’t listen.
“My husband and I have been married for years and we don’t plan on letting these silly rumors ruin the love we have for each other. I wish Kinley Thomas all the best, but even she knows that there’s nothing between them regardless of the time they spent together doing the movie.”
Teeth grinding, I power off my phone.
Was Corbin lying this whole time?
Chapter Five
Corbin / Present
I stare at the millionth undelivered email and toss the cell on the table before palming my eyelids. The empty room is about to fill with people in suits who annoy the hell out of me, so I try pushing my personal life to the side to save face. Thankfully half the people I encounter during meetings like this don’t give a shit about my personal life, just the money I line their pockets with.
It’s probably for the better considering I’m two seconds from wringing my wife’s neck. The stunt she pulled releasing a statement to the press about our supposed love-filled marriage boils my blood. She all but claimed her territory publicly to get the point across as if the statement Eddie made—without my consent—didn’t do a good enough job. She wasn’t just targeting the general population when she made it. She wanted Kinley to see.
I knew better than to ask her not to say anything about the situation with Kinley because it was unfair, but even she knows that feeding the press with bullshit like this only makes it worse. But Lena doesn’t care about anyone other than herself and I see that now more than ever.
When the conference room door opens, I’m leaning back in the chair with my arms resting across my chest. Men and women alike file in and take their seats around the polished oak, greeting me with fake smiles and enthusiasm. It’s always the same painted expressions throughout the hour of droning about business, meetings, and appearances.
“Callum,” Eddie Mansfield greets, closing the door behind him and taking the seat at the end per usual.
Eddie has been my manager for almost four years now. My first one got arrested for embezzling money from his clients, taking over ten million combined. Needless to say, my agent helped me find someone with a clean reputation. When he suggested Mansfield I’d been cautious, but he doesn’t beat around the bush and gets the job done without screwing me over.
“Let’s get down to it.” He slides paperwork in my direction. Catching it before it falls off the edge of the table, I study the schedule packed full of dates. “The promotional tour for this movie is going to take about four months to complete. You’ll start in the new year and end right before the film comes out in May. As you can see, there are talk show interviews spread out throughout the first two months. You’ll hit major networks first, then work your way into different social media channels to film question and answers both individually and with cast.”
My eyes trail down the list of places and dates, only half listening as he rambles on about the type of shit I’ve heard hundreds of times. I know the drill. Talk up the movie, play nice with cast mates, and get seen in public with fans. If it’s anything like my last project, I’ll do live interviews, make random appearances where the target audiences will most likely be, and do some fun events for YouTube movie bloggers that have a huge following.
When I see appearances with the cast and film crew, I scour for a different name. “When will we be doing interviews with Kinley?”
The room grows eerily quiet.
I glance up at my manager, who’s shifting in his chair. He clears his throat and leans forward, resting his arms on the table. “We feel it’s best if you two do separate interviews for the tour.”
My head cocks. “What about the question and answer segments scheduled at some of these locations? The audiences will want to know things from her that we can’t answer.”
A newer woman I don’t know the name to speaks up. “We’ve spoken to Ms. Thomas’s representation, and they also think it’s a good idea to keep the focus on the actors who brought the film to life.”
“That’s bullshit.” She flinches back. “We wouldn’t even have a film if not for her. Who told you that?”
“Sir—”
“Corbin,” Eddie cuts off. “With the amount of press you two are getting from the media right now, it’s best to let things cool off. I can confirm that she’ll be at the red-carpet event for the screening premiere in Los Angeles and do an after-screening Q&A panel.”
I level with him. “You always tell me that any press is good press. Half of the articles circulating are in tabloids everyone knows is made up bullshit.”
“And the other half?”
Pressing my lips together, I lean back in the chair and stare back down at the tour schedule. It wouldn’t be right to do this without Kinley. It’s one thing to conduct a few interviews with cast only, but another to not give credit where it’s due.
Kinley and I always used to say we’d support each other. How many times have we planned formal events? Award shows? This is our fucking moment and they’re telling me she won’t be a part of it when she’s the one who made this happen.
I tap the paper. “I want to talk to her.”
“Her agent—”
“I want to talk to Kinley,” I repeat, looking each person in the eye until they inevitably drop my gaze.
Eddie is the only one with balls enough to hold the stare. “That’s what I’m trying to tell you, son. Her agent informed us that she’s letting them handle all communication. From what I could gather, it’s been rough for her since the first article released. Her email, social media pages, you name it are all under somebody else’s control until things simmer down.”
Eyes widening, I grab my phone. “Rough how exactly?”
“You know how loyal fans can be,” is all he says, making me wary of what’s been happening under
my nose. I look at my professional pages but don’t run them, and oftentimes don’t look at anyone else’s. Her personal page has been set to private since she left California and I haven’t bothered sending her a friend request to reach out because I didn’t think she’d accept.
Scrolling through her business page, my eye twitches. For the most part everything looks clean. My bet is that whoever took it over for her keeps the comments regulated. But there are still some that pop up calling Kinley degrading things in my defense.
I wave my phone in the air. “Were any of you going to tell me about this?”
Somebody across the table intervenes cautiously. “All due respect, Mr. Callum, but we don’t represent her. I’m sure her people are handling the situation just fine.”
I smack the phone down onto the table harder than I intend. “I don’t know if you’re aware of this, but my name is being used to bring somebody else down. Someone, might I add, who doesn’t deserve that kind of treatment. Shouldn’t my reputation be your concern?”
Nobody says anything.
I turn back to Eddie. “I’ll say it again. I want to talk to Kinley. Now.”
He scrubs a palm down his face and rolls his shoulders back. “Think about this before you make an irrational decision. Do you truly think that reaching out to her is in her best interest?”
I scoff. “Do you even care about her best interest? It seems like you don’t.”
“Frankly, I’m not paid to care.”
Nostrils flaring, I know he’s not wrong. It doesn’t stop me from wanting to fight for her. She’s strong and can speak for herself, but I’m just as much to blame for this shitshow as her. She doesn’t need to go about it alone, especially not when Lena has become involved.
“I’m not being irrational.”
He straightens his spine, giving me his typical I know best look. “The last thing you need is press surrounding your personal life right now. You told me that you wanted privacy until things between you and Lena are figured out. If word gets out that you’re reaching out to another woman while married to someone else—”
