"Thank you, Fitzwilliam. Thank you ever so much. And in the future –"
"In the future, yes, I should consult you before protecting your sensibilities. Though I would point out, Mrs. Darcy, you are crying. This is the very reaction I was hoping to avoid." Mr. Darcy dutifully handed his wife a handkerchief and she dabbed at the dampness on her cheeks.
"Oh, but this could not have been avoided! I should very much like to have my first reaction in privacy. My entire family has seen what remains and I did not think I could bear hearing an account of the devastation without seeing it for myself."
Her explanation made Mr. Darcy feel a slight twinge of self-recrimination. He knew his wife to be a woman of good sense, caring of others. He privately resolved a personal conviction to respect her good qualities more in the future, for both of their sakes.
Shortly after the carriage train began its journey once more, the lead carriage took a left turn at the fork. Elizabeth practically held her breath as she knew it would be less than a quarter hour before they would reach the edge of her father's lands. Jane's letter regarding the fire had been most vague about the blaze, and Elizabeth's imagination took a flight of fancy of wondering if the trees had burned, or perhaps the surrounding fields? There were so many questions, and she twisted Fitzwilliam's handkerchief between her fingers in nervous anticipation.
“I was remiss in pointing out the very spot where we met,” her husband said and Elizabeth’s shoulders twitched as her emotions conflicted. She was equally amused and upset, so she merely pressed her lips into a thin line.
“Indeed, one year ago I stumbled across the most delightful creature. . .” Mr. Darcy turned and nuzzled his nose along Elizabeth’s hairline, further stirring her emotions. When he kissed the delicate spot below her ear, he reminded his wife of how much he loved her. Elizabeth rested her head on his shoulder, keeping a watch out the window while her husband held her.
When at last the trees cleared, the caravan of Darcy carriages passed by an empty gate and took the long winding drive up to the proper manor house of the small Longhorn estate. Elizabeth curiously looked out the window feeling very confused, but reasoned if her family was not in residence, perhaps no one guarded the gatehouse. Yet, the first tenant homes they passed showed no signs of activity whatsoever. At the fourth one, the occupants paused in the act of packing up a wagon to show a small amount of respect for the wealthy carriage passing by the property.
"I don't understand. These families have been with us for generations. Why are they leaving, Fitzwilliam?" Elizabeth knew it'd been more than a month since the fire, but the loss of the tenants surprised her so the shock grew even worse.
Mr. Darcy uncomfortably cleared his throat. It would pain him to explain the full scope of the situation, much of what he was able to guess from his own experiences. Bingley had also listed a few pieces of information in his letter that Jane had left out.
"The tenants did not begin to leave because of the fire," Mr. Darcy said quietly.
Elizabeth looked to her husband for a better explanation and he reached out his hand to hold hers.
"Charles wrote to me, explaining the many misfortunes your family endured over the summer months. Two families received word from relatives of a better opportunity. With the scandal surrounding the Bennet name …" Mr. Darcy trailed off as it was the two of them directly responsible for the scandal. Elizabeth began to violently shake her head.
"No, sir, that does not fall upon us. We came back and offered my father the opportunity to make things right. We wished to wed here in Hertfordshire, if only he would've given his blessing." Elizabeth bit her lower lip and looked away from her husband as the entire carriage train came to a stop. She'd been so busy talking about the tenants, that she had not caught the first glance of the charred remains of Longbourn.
Now, the woman who had been so insistent upon taking so many carriages and servants to the relic of her family's former glory, felt childish and insecure. She would have to leave the carriage and have her first glimpse the tragedy witnessed by so many in her husband’s employ. Elizabeth felt her blunder most terribly as Mrs. Darcy; a blunder her husband had attempted to save her from making.
Mr. Darcy rightly guessed his wife’s distress had renewed and pulled back the curtain on his side of the carriage so that Elizabeth could see the eastern wall of the home in privacy.
"I am grateful that you absolve us of responsibility,” he replied. “But I fear that some members of your family do not see the circumstances in the same light. Prior to the fire, there were whispers of your father being ill," Mr. Darcy paused as Elizabeth nodded. He breathed a sigh of relief that at least some of the more distressing news was not new to Elizabeth.
"Longbourn has suffered a blow that many estates succumb to and it is not unique to a man of your father's position. With no son, the future blood, Longbourn’s success was mired in mystery and speculation. Add to the fact that the circumstances of your visiting Kent were circulated to some degree, bringing about unhelpful gossip about Mr. Collins—"
"It was not gossip! The man is a brute!" Elizabeth interjected.
Mr. Darcy squeezed his wife's hand. He nodded. "Yes, and no tenant wishes to work the land for such a brute. So I am afraid whether there had been a fire or not, Fate had conspired in many ways to bring great suffering to your family. But I swear to you that we will never leave them suffering." Mr. Darcy gulped as Elizabeth had froze when she saw the charred wall knocked down and the empty hole where her father’s study had been. Her husband’s words seemed to snap her out of her stupor and Elizabeth turned her head so swiftly and glared so sharply at her husband, that he felt it necessary to repeat his pledge.
"I swear to you."
Elizabeth Darcy had held back her emotions for as long as she could manage. The romantic gesture of her husband to take on the burden of caring for her family was just too much. As she burst into tears, the Darcys embraced and Fitzwilliam held Elizabeth as she sobbed against his shoulder.
Mr. Darcy spied two coachmen standing near the door unsure of what to do. They had rightly supposed not to open the carriage door as Mr. Darcy had not given the signal that he did when he wished for his carriage to be open upon his arrival with his walking stick. So they stood sentry and waited for instructions.
As Elizabeth gathered her wits about her, she again used the much abused handkerchief her husband had gifted her, steeling herself for what must happen next.
With a determined sigh, Elizabeth set her jaw in a dignified line as she pushed her shoulders back into a tall and proper posture.
"Fitzwilliam?" She addressed her husband and waited for him to silently acknowledge that he heard her with a nod. "I'm ready. Please have them open the door."
Mr. Darcy smiled at his wife and the choreography of the Darcy exit commenced. Mr. Darcy exited first, turned, and then gallantly assisted his wife down from the carriage. He noticed that Elizabeth was not wearing her usual slippers for travel, but a pair of high walking boots. In that moment, Mr. Darcy realized what Higgins and his wife had been giggling about and he marveled at his wife’s ability to set into motion exactly the outcome she wished. She reminded him of his Aunt Margaret, Countess of Matlock.
“Patrick, please tell Mr. Holbein the carriages should continue on to Netherfield Park,” Elizabeth began to give orders to the coachman who was a burly seventeen stone of all muscle built up from a youth of loading and unloading trunks. Patrick nodded, but didn’t move his feet until Mr. Darcy could weigh in.
"Mrs. Darcy?"
Elizabeth Darcy sighed and smoothed her skirts. She bravely began to walk towards the charred hull of Longbourn’s front entrance. "Well, Mr. Darcy, it is not even a three mile walk so it should do us good. I'm ever so sick of carriages. And I dearly love the exercise." Elizabeth flashed her husband a smile to strengthen her resolve and he recognized the return of the mischievous miss he had fallen in love with a year ago.
Darcy quickly motioned for Patrick to st
ay with Mrs. Darcy in her service as he made arrangements with his staff for some refreshments to come with them and for his horse, Alexander, to be untethered. He intended to walk with Elizabeth all the way to Netherfield, but he would not be such a fool to go without precautions to care for his wife in her condition. Still, he knew better than to argue with Mrs. Darcy. When she asked for a walk, the woman needed such exercise. While he had made such a mistake before, he would not repeat it just because she carried his child.
5
Mrs. Darcy enjoyed tromping through the crisp autumn fields with her husband. Despite the difficulties of all around them, Elizabeth’s heart felt lighter that she and Fitzwilliam still made happy memories on their own terms. Their jaunt took little more than two hours before they arrived at Netherfield Park. Their caravan of carriages stood at a half count, clear evidence the unloading process was nearly completed.
“I suppose we should not expect a grand reception," Elizabeth laughed and her Fitzwilliam joined her. “I wonder how cross they will all be?” She wrinkled her nose just as their boots hit the graveled drive. Mr. Darcy held his wife’s hand up for a kiss before releasing her so they both could don their gloves for polite society.
Elizabeth wiggled her fingers into the delicate skins, then lifted her skirts in dismay.
"Oh I'm afraid there's not much I can do about that," she said, holding out her ankle at an angle to emphasize the hemline marred by mud. Then she laughed anew, recalling a time of more carefree days just a year ago when she regularly trekked the fields around Hertfordshire.
Mr. Darcy cleared his throat as Elizabeth allowed her hemline to fall back over her walking boots. He had genuinely enjoyed the exercise with his wife, and dearly wished to continue their solo walks. "I expect this visit we should go see that Oakham Mount of yours. Kitty's rendering of it has made me most curious of the prospect," Mr. Darcy finished his suggestion as they reached the steps of the grand house.
A footman had scurried ahead so that no sooner had they reached the top than they met the ‘grand reception.’ Various members of Elizabeth's family and Mr. Darcy's friend, Charles Bingley, had assembled in the doorway.
"You had us so fooled!" Jane chided her younger sister who merely smirked and did not respond. "I should have known at the first chance to walk a familiar path you would alight from the carriage to do precisely that!" Jane laughed as the two sisters embraced for the first time as married women.
Mrs. Bennet sniffled loudly behind her eldest daughter.
“It was a cruel trick, if you ask me. We were all in such anticipation for your arrival and then the carriage arrived completely empty! I feared the worst.” All eyes looked to Mrs. Bennet, half in solidarity and the other half in disbelief that she truly believed harm had come to the Darcys. But Mrs. Bennet doubled her complaints now that she held a captive audience. “The worst! I implored Mr. Bigley here to send riders right away, but no one listens to me. It is a happy chance that all is well," Mrs. Bennet gave her opinion most decidedly and looked to her youngest daughters to nod in agreement.
Elizabeth looked at Jane in bewilderment, but her elder sister merely shrugged.
"Mama, surely one of Mr. Darcy’s staff explained that we took a picnic and a walk. And it is so very lovely to see you," Elizabeth paused as she had not reconciled with her mother since the ghastly night that she was thrown out of Longbourn after Jane's wedding.
Hesitantly, she walked forward but her mother stood stoutly as Lizzie kissed her cheek. The collective gathering held their breath, and even Jane had wondered if their mother would shun Elizabeth. Instead, Mrs. Bennet sighed and leaned forward to kiss her daughter's cheek in return.
"It has been so long, but I hope that we can put the time and trials behind us to celebrate with happiness." Elizabeth Darcy attempted to offer an olive branch, but it was too much.
"Happiness? There is no happiness! Longbourn is lost. Your father lies in bed above, most grievously injured. How could you possibly think that I should be happy?" Mrs. Bennet clutched her handkerchief and turned away in a huff to storm off, with Lydia and Mary following behind her.
Elizabeth was crestfallen. "My apologies—” she began, but Jane shushed her.
"Come, there was no possible outcome to avoid awkwardness, but it is over now. I am certain you would love to refresh yourself upstairs," Jane said as Charles and Mr. Darcy interrupted their small discussion to explain they would retire to Mr. Bingley’s study.
Both men kissed their wives before leaving the ladies to their own devices, then Kitty rushed forward to squeeze Elizabeth with an embrace.
"Do you want to meet Charlie and Lynnie?" Kitty, having been selected as one of the godmothers, had grown exceptionally fond of her niece and nephew. Where Lydia and Mary found little reason to be in the nursery, Kitty had taken it upon herself to visit her charges, albeit spiritual guidance only, at least once per day.
Elizabeth nodded enthusiastically and pressed her hand to her heart. "I should love nothing else, however I fear that I am not fit for the company of infants nor anyone else. Allow me to change my gown and I shall join you thereafter?" she asked and Kitty agreed to the plan.
Jane escorted her newly arrived sister up the familiar stairs and directed her away from the same suite Lizzie used when she was still recovering from her injuries.
"We put you and Mr. Darcy in a wing to yourselves. With you so recently married, we thought you might enjoy the privacy," Jane explained.
"And it keeps us away from Mama," Elizabeth observed and Jane sadly nodded in agreement.
The two eldest daughters of the Bennet family walked slowly and Jane remained with her sister as she accepted Higgins’ assistance.
"Charles and I wholly support you and Mr. Darcy. And we would not excuse any slight against our guests, but I beg you to please have patience. Mama has lost everything, or so she feels, and… “Jane trailed off, unsure how to explain to Elizabeth that their mother still blamed her troubles on her second daughter in a most irrational way.
Higgins assisted Elizabeth to a bench in front of an enormous bad covered in linens of the finest peach silk. Truthfully, Elizabeth found this room more tastefully decorated than the last room she had slept in before marrying Mr. Darcy. When Higgins removed her mistress’ walking boots, Elizabeth’s swollen, sore feet were revealed and with a bloodied right toe.
"Lizzie!" Jane scolded her sister upon seeing her injury, but Elizabeth shrugged it off.
"It hardly hurts. Perhaps I shall soak them for a few moments?" Elizabeth asked, as her maid dashed off to retrieve some salts and warm water in a basin for her mistress.
"Did Mr. Darcy know that your foot was injured?" Jane asked, still slightly concerned that perhaps her sister's new husband did not care for her as he should, but Elizabeth shook her head emphatically.
"No, no, the walk was my design. I know better than to take such a distance in new boots, but I needed to see Longbourn."
Jane nodded in sympathy at the appropriate moments as Elizabeth explained how she wished to see the tragedy alone. When she finished explaining her feelings on the matter, Elizabeth shrugged one last time and look down at her injured feet.
"Perhaps I allowed myself a slight penance. The pain in my toes echoed the pains in my heart. Somehow that made it more bearable."
"Surely you do not blame yourself as well!" Jane said with an astonished tone that both Elizabeth and her mother could hold the same logic.
“Blame myself? Of course not! But I was not here, Jane. When you take ever so much upon your shoulders…” But Elizabeth didn’t finish her platitudes because she wondered who did blame her.
“Why should I blame myself?" Elizabeth asked as Higgins returned with the supplies needed to soothe her injured feet.
Jane looked down at Higgins and raised an eyebrow but Elizabeth scoffed.
"It's Betsy Higgins, Jane. I trust this woman with all of my secrets. And so have you. She has never betrayed us." Elizabeth endorsed her personal m
aid to hear whatever it was Jane wished to impart, and shyly, Higgins looked up to give her mistress a brief smile before turning back to her duties.
"You should not, that is I do not blame you. But Mama…" Jane trailed off again but Elizabeth was still confused. Finally, Jane clenched her fists and took in a sharp breath so she could push the words out as they would not be pleasant. "Mama erroneously believes that if you had married Mr. Collins, Longbourn would never have burned."
Elizabeth cried out as the warm water and salt stung her feet and at such a preposterous idea that she would ever have married Mr. Collins.
Jane tried to explain their mother’s ridiculous notion and both of the sisters would have laughed if it wasn't so very painful to speak out loud. Elizabeth remained quiet until Jane walked over to sit next to her on the bench. She looped an arm around her favorite sister, the very one that she had missed so much over the last few months. Lizzie leaned her head against Jane’s shoulder.
The affection broke Elizabeth’s stalwart resolve and she began to sob as she had not allowed herself to dissemble all through the terrible day. Finding solace in Jane’s company, Elizabeth wondered how everything was always her fault and never their parents’ poor judgement? The newly minted Mrs. Darcy realized that if their father had saved even a small fraction of his income, none of his daughters would have been required to marry a man as odious as Mr. Collins.
Suddenly, Elizabeth did not feel like Mrs. Darcy at all, but Elizabeth Bennet once more, always inadequate in the eyes of her mother.
“Oh, please, do not cry, or I shall start crying, and then I will have to change my gown," Jane explained and Elizabeth looked at her with astonishment. Jane smiled meekly and pointed at her bosom. They had spent more than enough time at the Gardiner town home in London to know when their aunt was nursing a babe, her emotions would sometimes cause an embarrassment.
"I suppose this may be as good a time as any to say there is reason to suspect I am with child," Elizabeth said quietly and Jane squealed with delight. The two sisters’ tears were forgotten and they talked excitedly about why Elizabeth suspected such. They lost themselves in tales of Scotland and Mr. Wickham’s death, so that an hour passed with little thought. They didn’t forget about poor Kitty, though, and sent Higgins to explain Mrs. Darcy’s difficulty with her new boots. The twins would be brought to the suite and Higgins was to also inquire if Miss Kitty wished to join her sisters. But when she finally found her mistress’ sister happily sketching in her studio, Kitty politely sent her regrets.
The Miracles of Marriage Page 3
