I rolled out of bed with a smile. I couldn’t fight it, no matter how hard I tried. I freshened up, tied my hair up in a top bun, and changed into a blue maxi dress.
I checked my phone and there was a missed call from Mom. She’d paid for long distance so she could check in with me. I knew she’d worry if I didn’t call back, seeing as I refused to answer the phone yesterday, so I sat on the bench in front of the bed and dialed her.
“Hi, sweetie!” she chimed after answering.
“Hey, Mom.” I smiled, realizing how much I actually missed her voice. “How’s Paris?”
“Oh, honey. It is a dream. Your dad and I are about to go have dinner at a restaurant with a view of the Eiffel Tower.”
“What? I’m jealous! That sounds amazing!”
“Hey, sweet cheeks!” Dad yelled in the background.
I giggled, and though he couldn’t hear me, I said. “Hi, Dad.”
“I wanted to call and check in, but I also wanted to tell you to be on the lookout for a package. It should be arriving sometime between today and Monday.” She blew a breath, as if she were exasperated. “This whole thing with work.”
“Work? What happened?”
“Well, my boss did something that wasn’t very pleasant or respectful. I’m starting a case to get out of my contract early at the firm. He was a bit too pushy with me several days ago.”
“No—I believe what you’re trying to say is he’s an asshole!” Dad yelled distantly. “He tried to come onto your mother. He tried to kiss her! He’s lucky she calmed me down!”
I gasped. “What? That jerk!”
Mom let out a sigh. “I know. Your dad could see right through him. I could tell he was being flirty, but I didn’t think he’d actually be that bold. I mean, the man has a wife! He’s insane!”
“So does this mean you’ll have to find another job?” I asked, worried. Mom loved her job. Dad and I always told her she should have just opened up her own firm. She always said she wasn’t ready to do that yet.
“Well, that’s the good part of all of this. Cane said he knows someone who is willing to give me a position at their firm as soon as everything is settled. It’s a much bigger firm too! Highly respected and recommended.”
“Aww, that’s great!” It really was great to know that. It was a good thing Cane was in our lives. He always knew how to help.
“Well, we’re about to go. Make sure you keep an eye out for the package, okay, honey? I miss you so much!”
“I miss you more!”
She made a kissing noise, said “Bye,” and then the call ended.
I smiled down at my phone for a moment, and then looked all around me.
I wasn’t home. I was in a place I shouldn’t have been, and the guilt gnawed at me, inside and out. I wasn’t going to let that bring me down though. I had to enjoy the next twenty-four hours with Cane and cherish every golden, luxurious moment.
With that thought in mind, I left the bedroom, walking barefoot down the hallway and the staircase.
Music was playing from somewhere, and I instantly recognized the voice. Childish Gambino. Frankie loved him, and after listening to him stream out of her speakers, his soulful voice grew on me, so much so that his songs filled every playlist I had. Knowing Cane actually liked him too made me realize that maybe we weren’t so different after all.
As Gambino sang about staying woke, I made my way around the corner, the funkadelic voice getting nearer. The kitchen was occupied, much to my surprise. A man in a white chef jacket and black pants was standing in front of the island. The countertop was covered in foods like muffins, thick strips of bacon, eggs, pancakes, sliced fruit, and coffee. His hair was a deep shade of gray, his face chubby and rosy.
He spotted me and smiled. “Oh. Good morning,” he greeted, and then he stepped back, grabbing some glasses from the cupboard and placing them on the countertop too. The man dusted off his hands, walked to the open door, said something, and then turned around, coming my way. “Enjoy.”
I watched him go then swept my gaze over the food before making my way toward the drawn double doors that led out to a deck overlooking the lake. Soft gusts of wind made the white curtains billow, some of it running over my skin and shifting the loose tendrils of my hair. I spotted the noise-maker—a Bluetooth music player built into the wall, along with speakers. When I made it to the door, I pressed my cheek on it and tried hard not to sigh.
There he is.
Cane was sitting in a cushioned chair, his legs spread slightly apart, and his cellphone in hand. He was staring at the lake, eyes narrowed, and I couldn’t blame him. The view from the deck was breathtaking, but very bright with the sunlight bouncing off the water.
A female’s voice was coming out of the phone and he was nodding repeatedly as she spoke. He wore a white T-shirt, but it did nothing to hide his chiseled body.
“That’s fine. As long as the percentage remains the same or increases, it should be okay until I get back.” As if he could feel someone watching him, he turned his head to the right and found me. His eyes appeared greener beneath the rays and sparkled as they ran over the length of me. Maybe I wasn’t imagining it last night. They were greener. Was Cane one of those people who had eyes that changed colors during certain temperatures or even certain moods? I’d learned about that in school. It was possible.
He picked up a white mug and brought it to his lips, his eyes trained on me as the woman on the phone continued her business chatter. There was a familiar hunger in his eyes, but also a deep adoration I’d never seen before. I blushed as he sipped.
“Is that acceptable, sir?” the voice went on.
“Perfectly fine, Cora,” he responded. “I’ll see you tomorrow afternoon.”
“Sounds great, sir,” Cora said. “Enjoy your getaway.”
“Believe me,” Cane gestured with his hand for me to come to him. “I will.” He ended the call while watching me walk his way. My smile spread even wider, my heart racing. “Look at you,” he sighed. “Glowing.”
I bit back a grin, sitting on his lap. “I wonder why.”
“Oh, I know why.” He wrapped a hand around me, pulling me close. He smelled good. Fresh, like he’d showered again this morning. Cane was an early bird. I needed to make a mental note of that because I loathed mornings. The only reason I was up that morning was because I wanted more time with him. “You okay? I didn’t get too rough last night, did I?”
“No.” I shook my head, lacing my arms around his neck. “Not at all. It was perfect, Cane.”
“Perfect?” He cocked a brow. “Sure that’s the word you wanna use?”
I giggled. “Yes, because it’s true. It was perfection.”
With a boyish smile, he asked, “You hungry?”
“I could use a hot meal.”
“Good.” He rubbed my back. “I had a local chef I know send one of his people to bring a few things from his restaurant. Go grab something to eat.”
I nodded, pushing off his lap and going into the kitchen. I grabbed one of the plates and topped it with pancakes, apples, and bacon. After pouring myself a mug of coffee and tucking the bottle of warm syrup beneath my arm, I headed for the deck, taking the seat next to his.
“Is Cora the assistant you were talking about last night?” I asked, pouring syrup on my pancakes.
“No, Cora is my secretary. My assistant’s name is Deon. He’s good at his job.”
“Cora knows about your little getaway?” I asked with a smirk.
“I told her before I left that I would be here for a few days. Told her I needed some time to think.”
“Ah.” I bit off a piece of the apple slice.
“Wasn’t a lie. There are a lot of things to think about.” He put his hand on top of mine, and I stopped eating, dragging my gaze up to his. I noticed there weren’t any hard lines around his eyes, per usual. His eyes were softer than I’d ever seen them before. “I’ve been thinking about you all morning, Kandy. How the hell are we going to kee
p doing this?”
“Doing what?” My heartbeat quickened, beating in my ribcage.
“Act like this was just a time to get whatever this is out of our systems? Because I’ll tell you right now, I haven’t had nearly enough.”
I pressed my lips. “I don’t know.” Sitting back, I crossed my legs and looked to my right to focus on the body of water. “Like you said, I’ll be in college soon. We won’t see each other as often as we do now.”
“But when we do? Then what? Did you think about that?”
“We just…see what happens, I guess. Who knows? Maybe what we feel now will go away. Maybe we’ll change and become friends again, like we were before I came onto you that night…”
He sat back, pulling his hand away to scratch the tip of his nose with his thumbnail. “Maybe,” he said. He sighed, looking over the rail. “But something tells me this won’t just go away—that the time and distance will only make us want each other more when we see each other again.”
“We’ll do better. We just can’t fight it like before. You know how crazy and irrational I can get when I want you…” I dragged my teeth over my bottom lip. “I hate fighting what I want, especially when it comes to you.”
He sat back, running the pads of his fingers over his temple and forehead. “But all of this is so fucked up,” he mumbled. “So fucked up.”
“Cane—“
“No, Kandy. Don’t say anything. There’s not much that can be said when we both know it’s true. This is all so very fucked up. Having breakfast with you like this? Spending a whole weekend with you? Having sex with you?” He dropped his hand. “You don’t know this, but when I think about Derek, I think about him facing a psychotic man with a gun, that psychotic man being my worthless father. I think about him being brave enough to stand in front of that threatening, menacing man, and taking him down to save my mother, who could have been killed that night, but survived. She got out alive because of Derek. Honestly, I don’t know what the hell I’d do without her. Yeah, she can be delusional and has her issues, but I love her. I…shit. I need her, Kandy. That’s why she’s in rehab for the second time, because I want her to do better, and I’m tired of losing her to the drugs.” He sighed and my throat thickened with emotion. “As a kid, I used to pray she’d get better. I promised her and myself that I would get her help when I could, so she could be the woman I knew and loved as a child. The one who protected me and put my sister and me first. The one who left my father without one look back—back when she was clean and honest and full of life. Before he found her again and fucked up her life. I know she’s still in there, and now that I can help her I’m fulfilling that promise, but I can’t help thinking about how I’m breaking the trust of the man who gave us another chance to rebuild our relationship. A man that I owe so much to.”
My eyes were hot, the truths truly setting in. Whatever appetite I thought I had completely vanished.
He huffed. “But then there are moments like this, when I’m around you and feel on top of the world. Moments like this are when I wonder—why? Why does it have to be you that I feel so much for? Why does it have to be so complicated, like my life isn’t already complicated enough?” I felt his pain and conflict with the raw crack of his words. “Why do I have to choose between my best friend and what my heart and mind really desires, after sacrificing pretty much everything in my life just to get to where I am today?” His eyes glistened, red-rimmed, and my heart both swelled and ached for him. “At the end of the day, I know what I’ll have to do. It’s just going to be hard to fall through with it.”
“Cane…I-I’m sorry,” I whispered, grabbing his hand. “I swear, I’m so sorry. I wish I felt something else too. I feel awful keeping this secret from my dad—especially after hanging out with him last week. I felt like shit that day and swore I would avoid you, but here I am. I don’t know what it is about you. I’ve felt it since I was a little girl—this crazy connection that is impenetrable and special. I know it’s wrong to want you, but when I see you or I get the chance to be around you, all of that wrongness disappears.” I sniffled. “I—I don’t know. It’s hard for me to explain. He always says how he’s so proud of you and all you’ve accomplished, and that you deserve it more than anyone. He talks about how you helped him get through his recovery with baseball or basketball games, or quick beers at the bar you guys met at, and I literally hate myself. But then there are moments like this, when we’re alone, like you said. You’re right next to me. Touching me. Seeing me for who I really am…and there’s nothing I want more than you. It’s like nothing else matters when we’re together.”
“I know,” he sighed, a weary, painful noise that made my heart ache and bloom. Did this really hurt him that much? To the point he couldn’t choose—wouldn’t choose? To the point he would leave us all behind if it came down to it? God, that thought scared the hell out of me. I didn’t want him to leave. I wanted him around forever. I wanted him to always be one phone call or drive away. To be honest, I just wanted him to myself.
Cane leaned forward and stroked my cheek. He wiped a tear away, a tear I didn’t even realize had been shed. “It’s funny,” he laughed, a genuine one that seemed to come from deep within him. “I can handle everything about my job. When there’s a deal that has to be made, I’m down to do it, and I usually come out on the winning side. I’ve traveled all over the world. I’ve met some of the richest men on the planet, sold hundreds of bottles of wine to them in less than five minutes with a good pitch, and it was all so simple to me. But when it comes to you?” His head shook and dropped. His dark lashes touched his cheekbones, and I’d never seen him look more vulnerable than now. “I have no clue what to do with you. Wanting you is a beautiful challenge, Kandy Cane, and though it’s complicated, I don’t want to figure this one out anytime soon. As selfish as it sounds, I want this challenge to last for as long as it possibly can. I love the spontaneity of what we have—the satisfaction I get when I see your smile, and the comfort I feel when your skin touches mine.”
“Oh my God!” A laugh bubbled out of me, and I swiped my tears with the back of my arm. “How is a girl ever supposed to get over you when you talk to her like this?”
He grinned, cupping a hand around the back of my neck and bringing me forward to place a warm, smooth kiss on my cheek. Bringing his head up and pressing his forehead to mine, he said, “I don’t know, but what I do know is that we’re a fucking mess.”
He was so right.
We were a mess.
A wild, beautiful, perfect mess, and that made me the happiest girl ever.
41
KANDY
For the rest of the morning, Cane worked on his laptop while I sunbathed on the deck. He was in the chair beside mine, and every time I rolled over, I caught him staring at me, like he was deep in thought.
“What?” I’d laughed.
“Nothing,” he responded quickly, but gave a boyish smile that proved he was thinking about way more than nothing.
We ate sandwiches on the deck for lunch, and for dinner we settled with ordering pizza, which was more than okay with me. Cane had music playing after dinner, and we pretty much danced the pizza off. He’d twirl me quickly, and I would giggle, and then he’d reel me into his arms, bend me backwards just a little, and place a warm, soft kiss on my lips or the hollow of my neck.
He was so romantic, and when I told him he was, he denied it. Said he was just being himself, whatever that meant.
By nightfall, we were all over each other again. I mean, how was I supposed to resist?
“You’re gonna wear me out,” Cane teased as I gripped his hand and led the way upstairs.
I smiled over my shoulder, making my way to the master bedroom. I couldn’t wait anymore. We’d been teasing and flirting all day, but I needed him again. I wanted to feel his warm body on top of mine, his lips all over me, his mouth in the special places only he was allowed to touch.
Cane shut the bedroom door behind us and then walked
around the room lighting the candles he’d had on the night before. He turned to face me after sparking the last one, and pulled his shirt over his head with a small smirk. I was sitting on the bed, my shirt now off, only wearing a bra and shorts.
“You’re eager,” he noted, walking my way.
“I am,” I murmured when he stepped between my legs. His hands dropped to hold my waist, and he tugged me close, both of us releasing shaky breaths. The tip of his nose skimmed over the arch of mine, trailing down to my lips and then up my cheekbone.
“I want to try something different tonight,” he murmured on my mouth.
“Yeah? What’s that?”
“I’d rather show you.” He pulled away and told me to turn around and crawl to the middle of the bed. I turned and crawled, feeling his eyes on my backside. He ordered me to stay on all fours, so I did.
The bed dipped behind me, and his fingers found the waistband of my shorts, gently pulling them down. I lifted both legs to help him get them off.
All that was left was my panties and bra. Cane let out a deep, coarse groan behind me as he gripped one of my ass cheeks. He squeezed it with a sigh, and the bed dipped even more as he fully climbed on top of it. I felt heat behind me, and when I glanced over my shoulder, his face was near my behind.
He nuzzled his nose between the crack of my ass and I let out a gasp. This was different…and I was surprised that I liked it so much. Having him invade my personal space this way and take control? New. Different. Exciting.
He ran his nose up and down, and I felt the heat of his mouth near my pussy. Was that why he was doing this? To tease me? Get me worked up?
“You always smell so good,” he rasped. He brought his face forward with a sigh while pushing my panties aside. In an instant, his hot mouth brought me to life. I gasped as he kissed my pussy from behind. He kissed it again with a guttural groan, and a trail of goosebumps swept over my skin.
His hand came up to press between my shoulder blades and he pushed me down until the right side of my face was on the bed.
The Cane Series: A Complete Forbidden Romance Series (4-Book Set) Page 24
