CHAPTER XLIV
AT VASSILITZI'S
Into my dreams came voices that I knew, speaking in French, in low toneswhich yet reached my ears distinctly.
"I think we should tell him; it is not right, or just, to keep him inignorance."
"No,--no,--we must not tell him; we must not!" Anne said softly, butvehemently. "We shall need him so sorely,--there are so very few whom wecan really trust. Besides, why should we tell him? It would break hisheart! For remember, we do not know."
They were not dream voices, but real ones, and as I found that out, Ifelt I'd better let the speakers,--Anne and Loris,--know I was awake;for I'd no wish to overhear what they were saying, especially as I had aqueer intuition that they were talking of me. So I sat up under the furrug some one had thrown over me, and began to stammer out an apology inEnglish.
The room was almost dark, and through the window, with its heavy stoneframe, I saw the last glow of a stormy sunset. Anne and Loris stoodthere, looking out, and as I moved and spoke she broke off her sentenceand came towards me.
"You have slept long, Maurice; that is well," she said, also in English,with the pretty, deliberate accent I had always thought so charming."There is no need for apologies; we should have roused you if necessary,but all is quiet so far. Will you come to my boudoir presently? I willgive you tea there. We have scarcely had one word together as yet,--andthere is so much to say! I will send lights now; some of the servantshave returned and will get you all you need."
Loris opened the door for her, and crossed back to his former post bythe window, while I scrambled up, as a scared-looking, shamefaced manservant entered with a lamp, and slunk out again.
"Those wretches! They deserve the knout!" Loris said grimly, when wewere alone. "They were all well armed, and yet, at the first hint ofdanger, they took themselves into hiding, leaving those two womendefenceless here. Well, they will have to take care of themselves infuture, the curs! The countess is dead," he added abruptly.
"Dead!" I exclaimed.
"Yes. Always, even in her madness, she remembered all she had suffered,and her terror of being arrested again killed her. It is God's mercy forher that she is at peace,--and for us, too, for we could not have takenher with us, nor have left her in charge of Natalya and these hounds, aswe had intended. We shall bury her out in the courtyard yonder. It isthe only way, and later, if nothing prevents, we start for therailroad."
"Where is Pendennis?" I asked. "Is he not here?"
"No; he may join us later; I cannot say," he answered, staring out ofthe window. I felt that he was embarrassed in some way; that there wassomething he wished to say, but hesitated at saying it. That wasn't abit like him, for he had always been the personification of frankness.
"I wonder if there's a bath to be had in the house," I said inanely,looking at my grimy hands.
"Yes, in Vassilitzi's dressing-room; the servant will take you up," heanswered abstractedly, and as I moved towards the wide old-fashionedbell-pull by the stove, he turned and strode after me.
"Wait one moment!" he said hurriedly. "Are you still determined to gothrough with us? There is still time to turn back, or rather to go backto England. It would not be easy perhaps, but it would be quite possiblefor you to get through, via Warsaw and Alexandrovo, if you go at once."
"Why do you ask me that?" I demanded, looking at him very straight. Hisblue eyes were more troubled than I had ever seen them. "Do you doubtme?"
"No, before God I trust you as I trust none other in the world butMishka and his father! But you are a stranger, a foreigner; why shouldyou throw your life away for us?"
"I have told you why, before. Because I only value my life so far as itmay be of service to--her. If I left her and you, now, as you suggest,smuggled myself back into safety,--man, it's not to be thought of!"
"Well, I will urge you no more," he said sadly. "But you are sacrificingyourself for a chivalrous delusion, my friend."
"Where's the delusion? I know she does not love me; and I am quitecontent."
Long after, I knew what he had wished to tell me then, and I can't evennow decide what I'd have done if he had spoken, whether I would havegone or stayed; but I think I'd have stayed!
When I had bathed and dressed in Vassilitzi's dressing-room,--he wasstill in bed and asleep in the adjoining one,--a servant took me toAnne's boudoir, a small bare room that yet had a cosey homelike lookabout it.
She was alone, sitting in a low chair, her hands lying listlessly on thelap of her black gown. Her face was even whiter and more weary than ithad looked in the morning, and she had been weeping, I saw, for her longlashes were still wet; but she summoned up a smile for me,--that bravesmile, that was, in a way, sadder and more moving than tears.
"You have heard that my mother is dead?" she asked, in a low voice. "Shedied in my arms half an hour after we got in; and I am so glad,--soglad. I have been thanking God in my heart ever since. She never knewme; she knew none of us, but Yossof; and that only because he had beennear her in that dreadful place. You saw her--just for a moment; you sawsomething of what those long years had made of her,--and we--my God, wehad thought her dead all that time!"
She shuddered, and sat staring with stern, sombre eyes at the fire, herslender fingers convulsively interlaced.
She was silent for a space, and so was I, for I could find never a wordto say.
Suddenly she looked straight at me.
"Maurice Wynn, if ever the time comes when you might blame me, condemnme,--justifiably enough,--think of my mother's history. Remember that Iwas brought up with one fixed purpose in life,--to avenge her, even whenI only thought her dead. How much more should that vengeance be, nowthat I know all that she had to suffer! And she is only one amongthousands who have suffered,--who are suffering as much,--yes, and more!There is but one way,--to crush, to destroy, the power that hasdone,--that is doing these deeds. It will not be done in our time, butwe are at least preparing the way; within a few days we shall have gonesome distance along it--with a rush--towards our goal. I tell you thatto further this work I would--I will--do anything; sacrifice even thosewho are dearer to me than my own soul! Therefore, as I said, rememberthat, when you would condemn me for aught I have done, or shall do!"
"I can never condemn you, Anne; you know that well! The queen can do nowrong!"
The fire that had flashed into her eyes faded, dimmed, I thought, by amist of tears.
"You are indeed a true knight, Maurice Wynn," she said wistfully. "I donot deserve such devotion; no, don't interrupt me, I know well what I amsaying, and perhaps you also will know some day. I have deceived you inmany ways; you know that well enough--"
"As I now know your purpose," I answered. "But why didn't you trust meat first, Anne? When we were in London? Don't think I'm blaming you, I'mnot, really; but surely you must have known, even then, that you mighthave trusted me,--yes, and Mary, too."
She was not looking at me now, but at the fire, and she paused beforeshe answered slowly.
"It was not because I did not trust you, and her; but I did not wish toinvolve either of you in my fortunes. You have involved yourself inthem,--my poor, foolish friend! But she, have you told her anything?"
"No. She does not even know that I am back in Russia; and before Ireturned I told her nothing."
"She thinks me dead?"
"She did not know what to think; and she fretted terribly at yoursilence."
"Poor Mary!" she said, with a queer little pathetic smile. "Well,perhaps her mind is at rest by this time."
"You have written to her?"
"No,--but she has news by this time."
"And your father?" I asked.
She shook her head.
"You must ask me nothing of him; perhaps you will learn all there is toknow one day. How strangely your fate has been linked with mine! Thinkof Yossof meeting _you_ that night. He had heard of my danger from theLeague. Ah, that traitor, Selinski! How much his miserable soul had toanswer for! And he did not know whom to tr
ust, so he set out himself,though he speaks no word of any language but his own, and bribed andbegged his way to London. He found out some of the League there, at aplace in Soho, learned there where Selinski lived, stole the key to hisrooms, and--met you. He is a marvel, the poor good Yossof!"
"Did you know it was he, when I described him that night?" I askedimpulsively.
She looked up quickly.
"I have told you, I did not wish to entangle you in my affairs, and--"
The door opened and her cousin entered.
"Ah, you are engaged," he exclaimed, glancing from one to the other ofus.
"No, we have finished our chat," said Anne. "Come and sit down,Stepan--for a few minutes only. We have much to do,--and far to go,to-night."
How weary and wistful her face looked as she spoke!
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