by Elena Lawson
“Did Aisling tell you that she examined Valin? And that his mind held no injury that would account for his loss of memory,” I said sweetly, waiting oh so patiently for a response.
Aisling nodded, “It’s true,” she said, “And just this evening, I spoke with Loris who couldn’t think of a single legitimate reason why his memory hasn’t returned.”
Surprise flickered over Alaric’s features. His lips pursed. He opened his mouth to retort, but…
“Would you mind waiting outside?” I asked him, taking his shoulder into my hand to guide him. He startled at the contact, coming back to himself with one of his rare crooked half smiles, realizing I was only toying with him. I leaned into him. “I can’t focus when you’re in the room,” I whispered cruelly against his neck.
His back went rigid. The soft skin on the back of his neck pricked. He swallowed, nodded once and turned to Aisling. He extended his hand, and she grasped it in her own, “Aisling,” he said, “A pleasure. I apologize for not introducing myself properly the first time we met.”
By Aisling’s expression, I could tell she thought it odd Alaric decided to formally introduce himself right then. But she didn’t know what he was doing. She didn’t know what his Grace was.
He was reading her. Sifting through her emotions and her intentions. Making sure they were pure and posed no threat to his queen.
I quirked a brow at him, and he gave me one slight nod. It was safe. He would leave. But he wouldn’t go far.
“I can see why you like them,” Aisling said, tilting her head towards the now closed door.
My shoulders tensed, “What do you mean?”
Aisling looked away, turning to take a seat in front of the low table, “Never mind, it’s really not my business,” she said.
No, it wasn’t her business. And though my romantic choices would upset my court a trifle less than my Graces, there would still be outrage. Uproar. They expected me to take a mate—one mate, and to produce an heir. If they knew my intentions, or my lack of intention to choose one, they wouldn’t be happy. Because I would never choose just one of my males. And I would never bond myself to a pompous noble just to appease my people.
One day, I would have to admit it. I’d have to tell them—tell everyone. But I wasn’t ready yet.
“Shall we begin?” I said instead, avoiding the masked question in her polite words.
Aisling lifted the hem of her skirt, and I caught a flash of bare ivory skin and scuffed leather boots before she drew a dagger from the left one.
I jumped back, “What are you doing?”
She shook her head at me, a smirk twitching at the corner of her mouth, “Relax,” she said gently, “How do you expect to learn how to heal if there’s no injury to heal?”
That made sense. Though I didn’t expect her to drag the blade across her palm. Didn’t expect to see her wince at the pain, or to see the bright, vibrant crimson of her blood well up and drip, drip onto the polished wood floor.
I bit my lip, “You didn’t have to—”
“Hurry up before I bleed all over the floor,” she said, setting the dagger down on the low table at her front.
I rushed over and knelt before her, “What do I do?”
She grabbed my hand and placed it into her bloody one. It was warm and wet and made my stomach turn. She flinched. “Now focus,” she said, “Like you did with Valin—like you did with Kade.”
I blew out a long breath and sealed my eyes shut, drawing on that inner pool of warmth—not the fire. No. The other kind, the warmth that’s glowing and bright and spreads like the light of the sun when it’s just starting to rise. Aisling grasped my hand tighter and the healing Grace bloomed all once in my core.
It spread and writhed, seeking, but not finding.
“Find the injury,” Aisling’s voice broke through the barrier of light in my mind. I focused. Searched through the light, and within moments, I found the dark spot. Like a small dark tear in an otherwise pristine golden tapestry. I wrapped the light around it, sewing it closed with nothing but my own will.
I couldn’t say how long it took, but when I blinked myself back into myself—into the here and now, Aisling was looking at me with pride. Beaming.
“That was so good,” she praised, showing me her smooth hand. “It’s incredible,” she continued, “I took months to be able to heal so well, and so quickly.”
“This is good, right?”
I’d be able to heal my men in no time. Maybe even before the memorial—just in case.
She nodded vehemently, “Very,” but her smile faded, “Well—it’s good, but it really isn’t any use if you can’t access it unless you’re touching another healer. We’re rare. I doubt there are more than four or five in the entire Night Court.”
I rocked back on my heels, all the wind ripped from my sails.
“Call for Alaric,” Aisling said after a moment of thought, “I want to see if you can heal him without contact.”
It was no use. And Alaric flayed his skin open for nothing. It wasn’t easy to watch either. I had to turn away when he did it. And then I was so desperate to heal him I couldn’t bring myself to focus. I barely managed to draw the Grace out even enough for me to feel it was there without Aisling touching me. And after several hours, Aisling said we should stop before I exhausted myself and ended up healing Alaric herself.
Little did she know I was already beyond the point of exhaustion. If I had less pride, I’d have asked Alaric to carry me to bed. My eyes burned, and my bones were heavy as though filled with iron.
I hardly remembered how I got into bed, much less how my robe had vanished, or my hair had come undone. I laid next to Alaric under the cloudlike covers, lulled by the slow rise and fall of his chest and the steady throb of his heartbeat.
He stroked my hair lightly, and even though my eyes were closed, I knew he was deep in thought.
“What is it?” I murmured.
He sighed, “It’s just—are you sure I can’t change your mind about going to the memorial?”
I gave my head a small shake, “No.”
He sighed again, “Such a stubborn girl.”
“Best get used to it. You’re stuck with me.”
Alaric’s hand halted in its soothing, stroking rhythm. A small sound of complaint vibrated in my chest and he resumed brushing his fingers through my hair. Over my scalp.
“Sleep now, my queen,” he whispered into the dark. His power over emotion seeped into my skin, further settling my bones, bringing me calm. Peace.
“If you insist on going to the memorial, then we must prepare. Tomorrow we will—” Alaric kept talking, his voice a low monotone, blending seamlessly into the sounds of the breeze dancing in from the terrace.
I moaned at the beauty of his Grace. It encapsulated me with warm security, like a blanket impervious to the evils of the outside world. It left me aching to fall into that soft, beautiful dark. Wishing I could live in it. In the painting of absolute peace swaying behind my eyelids. So beautiful.
So… perfect.
Chapter Fifteen
“A peasant would never wear that,” I said to Kade, who held up a simple gray dress for my approval.
While the others rested—getting ready for our training session that afternoon, Kade was tasked with helping me find something suitable to wear to the memorial.
Kade tossed the dress down onto the bed, atop a pile of numerous other rejects. “The material—it’s too fine. And the seams are too perfect. Anyone could see expert hands made it. It probably cost more than most peasant families earn in a week.”
He grunted. “Then what do you suggest. These are the simplest things Darius had.”
An image of the short man with the smiling face and the ancient eyes flashed before me. I hadn’t seen Darius in weeks—not since before he finished redecorating my entire royal chambers.
“You got these from Darius?” I said, incredulous.
“Where else would I have gotten them?”
>
I folded my hands in front of me, trying, and failing not to giggle, “So, you’re telling me you got clothes to dress me as a peasant from the best tailor in the entire kingdom?”
He gave it a moment of thought, “Right,” he said, averting his gaze, and then, “Any idea where we could get something more… ugly?”
I chuckled, “Actually, yes. I do. Care to stretch those wings?”
Kade nervously eyed the terrace, “Alaric wouldn’t like it.”
He was right. Alaric would be furious. And it wasn’t like before. I wouldn’t ask Kade to keep a secret from Alaric. Not anymore. I had made them all a promise, and I wouldn’t break it for a dress.
“You’re right,” I admitted, then sat down to think. “I know—lets go find Aisling.”
“Why?”
I looked over my small frame, the slight curve of my hips and breasts, the narrow width of my shoulders. “I think we’re about the same size.”
Kade held out his arm to me, seeming all too eager, “Spending a lot of time with her lately, I’ve noticed.”
I linked my arm through his, “Is that a bad thing?”
“Not at all. You spend too much time surrounded by males. And I was wrong about her. She’s alright.”
I snorted, “Glad you approve.”
He winked at me, “Lets go find you some ugly clothes.”
The halls of the palace were bathed in warm light. In a few weeks it would be autumn and I thought I could almost taste it approaching. The flavor crisp—with a hint of drying leaves and souring apples.
Seasons came swift on Meloran, each lasting no more than a few months at best. The isle was known for being in an eternal state of spring, and I tired of the season. I wanted to feel the brittle texture of fallen leaves and dance in the snow.
Kade led me through the corridors, his arm no longer entwined with mine. It wouldn’t look right to anyone who was paying attention. Instead he settled for brushing the back of my hand and shooting me hungry stares when no one was looking. Reveling in the thought that it was forbidden.
If I was honest, I was enjoying it too. My face hot and pink with blush, trying to hold back bursts of laughter when nobles passed us, curtseying and bowing as they went. I felt like a child again. Testing the limits and enjoying the feeling of almost getting caught.
We rounded the corridor towards the infirmary just as a familiar figure was exiting the chamber.
“Valin!” Kade called, giving me a small apologetic look before we walked over to meet the decorated hero.
Valin turned, “Ah,” he said, face splitting into a smile as he recognized us, “Your Majesty, and Kade, was it?”
Kade nodded.
“Nice to see you again,” Valin added, bowing at his waist.
He seemed better than before, there was no sign of injury anywhere on him, and most of the color had returned to his face. They made him stronger, and for a Fae male already Graced with strength… I wasn’t sure how I felt about it, “You’re looking much better,” I said, accidentally allowing a note of distaste to slip into my words.
He gestured to the infirmary entrance behind him, “You have a skilled healer. I’m lucky to have received such care.”
“An honor,” I said, inclining my head.
A beat of awkward silence followed before Valin spoke again, this time turning his attention toward Kade, “You must be looking forward to the memorial.”
Kade hurried to answer his childhood hero, “Yes—yes, of course. I look forward to it every year.”
“So, you’ll be attending, then?”
My Draconian warrior rubbed at his neck. His great black wings twitched. I could tell he wasn’t sure if he should tell Valin.
“He hasn’t decided yet,” I answered for Kade, “Though I keep telling him he should.”
“Indeed,” Valin said, leveling an accusatory stare at Kade, looking all too regal and important in his soft black cloak and deep purple tunic. “I, myself, plan to at least try to attend, my health permitting.”
Kade’s eyes widened, “We would be honored to have you there, my lord.”
Valin’s lips spread in a thin line of a smile, one that didn’t reach his eyes, “Well then,” he said, “Kade,” he nodded, “Your Majesty,” he bowed, “A pleasure.”
As he raised his head, his gaze flickered again to my hand—only for an instant. Inconspicuous. But I knew he had looked. Perhaps checking to see if the ring still remained on my finger.
He gave me the chills.
Kade, sensing something was off, rubbed warmth back into my arms, “You really don’t like him, do you?”
I shook my head, “I don’t.”
He sighed long and loud, “Well then neither do I. If you think there’s something he’s hiding, I’ll find out what it is.”
I stepped back from him, examining the mirth in his eyes. Finding only a determined though subdued flame within them. My heart leapt, “Do you mean that?”
“I do,” Kade began, leading me into the infirmary, “I may not like it, but I see how he affects you. I’d like to settle the matter once and for all.”
A relieved sigh had my tightened shoulders relaxing, falling back to where they belonged on either side of my neck instead of my ears. “Thank you.”
“Don’t thank me yet,” he whispered as we approached the main healing room, “You could be wrong.”
But I wasn’t. I couldn’t explain how I knew it. I just did. Valin was not right. He would see. They would all see, and then we could be rid of him.
“Liana,” Aisling said, opening the door to her shared chambers. The older healer was still in the main healing chamber, mixing elixirs and tidying the space. She had showed us the way to the healers’ bedchambers—with more than a little ire, before stomping back to her duties.
“What are you doing here?”
“I need your help,” I said, and her eyebrows furrowed, regarding Kade at my side. Worry tightened the muscles in her jaw.
I shook my head, “I need to borrow some clothes,” I explained, before she ran away with her own theories about the kind of help I needed.
But she only looked more confused, her lips parting and perfect brows lowering further over her eyes. “Have you tired of extravagant gowns?” she asked, the jesting nature of the question bringing a smile to my lips. “I’d be happy to trade wardrobes with you anytime you like.”
“I tired of them a long time ago,” I laughed, stepping into the room as she opened the door wide for us to enter, “You’re welcome to my wardrobe any time.”
He eyes lit, “What sort of clothes do you need. I really don’t see why you would want to wear anything so—so…”
“Normal,” I offered.
“Well, I was going to say boring,” she said with a wink.
I wasn’t sure if she should know of my plans to go to the memorial either. It felt safest keeping the information only between myself and my males. “I have my reasons,” I said, winking to soften the blow of dishonesty.
Aisling rushed over to open her armoire. It was small. Not more than a box of wood squatting in the corner of the room. “I don’t have much,” she said, and at once I was thinking of ways to remedy that.
Darius. Yes, I would have Darius make her a few new dresses to say thank you.
She rummaged through an unkempt pile of clothing resting on the shelves. “Anything more from Valin?” I inquired.
“Not yet,” she said without turning around, “But he’s asked to see me again—tonight.”
Kade coughed to hide a laugh. I rolled my eyes and gave him a pointed glare. In so many words, he had said he thought Aisling to be a whore. But he was wrong about her.
“Don’t snicker at me you big oaf,” she said, turning from her digging only for a moment to give him a glare of her own.
I laughed at her callousness, watching Kade’s eyes widen and ears turn vibrant red.
“The mighty Kade,” Aisling teased, “Did he tell you I’m the only female
in this palace who’s ever turned him down.”
My jaw clamped shut, “No, he didn’t.” I turned to Kade for an answer, or maybe an explanation, but he seemed preoccupied with a stain at the floor near his boots.
“It’s not like that—I’m not like that. Not anymore,” he finally said.
And I knew he was telling the truth, but the burning of jealously still twisted in my stomach, anyway. I didn’t want to share him. He was mine and I his. As I was for all my males. I hoped I was enough for him, too.
“He isn’t lying,” Aisling said, turning from the armoire with a wad of dark fabric in her hands, “You seem to have him tamed,” she said with a smirk. “A task, I think, only a queen could accomplish.”
Kade shrugged. The dopey, apologetic expression on his face something I could never be upset at.
“Would this work?” Aisling asked, drawing my attention back to her. She held up a burgundy colored dress, “It’s the best I have.”
It was simple, almost thread-bare. The color had faded—leached out from too many uses. But it was pretty, for something so ordinary, and reminded me of the dresses I had worn on the isle. Or at least the ones I had worn when I wasn’t in trousers and a blouse.
“It’s perfect.”
Chapter Sixteen
Aisling had plans to see Valin again that night. He had requested she join him to dine in his chambers. Progress, she’d said. Be careful, is what I said, but she’d waved me off, telling me not to worry about her. She knew how to handle horny men, she’d been doing it for years. But it wasn’t his lust I was worried about and I think she knew it too.
In any case, she’d be coming by the royal chambers afterwards to tell me all about it.
“Try harder,” Finn said, freezing half the placid lake before us with nothing more than the tip of his finger.
Of all my Graces, ice and the power over emotion Alaric had seemed to be the most difficult to wield. I had only produced frost, even with Finn touching me. And though Alaric was certain he’d felt me use his Grace once before, I still couldn’t push even the smallest bit of emotion into him. Which was why it was Alaric and Finn with me on the banks of the lake instead of Kade and Tiernan—though I still couldn’t draw out the Day Courter’s Grace either?
