by Elena Lawson
Liana
We’d won, and yet it didn’t feel like a victory.
With all the lives lost and homes ruined, how could it? One thing I knew for certain—I’d seen enough of war and woe for a lifetime.
Alaric curled his hand around mine, rubbing soothing circles into the back of it with his thumb. My other guardians waited for us in the bay. Ready with a ship meant to carry us across the Varinian Sea.
Edris sat on the other side of the oval table in the council chambers with Queen Suriel pressed against his right side. The pair looked well after several days of rest, and I wondered when the Queen of Day would go home to her own court. She didn’t seem as though she wanted to leave at all.
My father pushed the parchment back across the table, pressing his lips into a hard line, “But why?” he asked.
I considered my response carefully, “Because I don’t know when I’ll return.”
“Do you mean to return at all?” Suriel questioned, her shoulders pushed back, “After everything you’ve fought for, why leave?”
I couldn’t tell them the whole truth of it. I hadn’t even told my males yet. Thank the gods they accepted my decision without too much prodding.
“It doesn’t matter,” I answered, sighing. Worrying the soft fabric of my cloak. “Almost the entirety of my court has taken refuge within Day Court borders. And I thank you for that,” I said pointedly to Suriel, “It will take years. Decades, if not more to rebuild what was lost here in the north.”
“But, a land without a ruler—”
“My people will have a ruler—a steward of the throne of Night will remain in my stead. That is what I ask of Edris.”
Alaric cleared his throat, “I’ll bring the queen home safe, once she’s done whatever it is she’s setting out to do.”
“And what is that exactly?” my father asked skeptically, one brow raised.
I shrugged, “I’m not sure yet… but the people of the Night Court have always admired and revered you. I know they will follow your lead, and I trust you to be their ruler.”
Gods… I couldn’t believe I’d once thought he was out to dethrone me, and now here I was—quite literally giving him my throne. But he wasn’t like Enya, or like the other nobles at court. He was wise, and caring, and fair. He’d take good care of my court until I returned.
If I returned, I reminded myself. I wasn’t sure yet if I ever would. My males were all that mattered to me. They were my home. And if I was being honest, I’d never quite fit into the role of queen. The mold was too small. Constricting.
I made a promise once, to the seven sisters on the isle where I grew up. A promise to return one day, and I longed for the quiet, tranquil solitude of that faraway place again. After that—I wasn’t sure where we’d go. To the mortal lands, perhaps? I wanted to settle somewhere free and safe. Untainted by the stain of war and death.
Some place we could start anew. The five of us. Build a family together. We could decide to return someday, when the babe was grown, but that would be a decision for another time…
Looking at Suriel and Edris, I saw what my people saw—they even looked like rulers. Regal. Refined. They didn’t even know they’d been stuffed into molds, that their lives would open up before them with limited possibilities. And it was because they’d been conditioned to live a certain way. Take one mate. Have one Grace. Produce an heir.
And perhaps that was what they would do if I never returned. Produce an heir that could rule over both courts and form a united kingdom of Fae.
Maybe… but I wouldn’t be around to watch them do it.
“I’ll do it,” Edris said, pulling the contract back to him. Lifting the quill. “If this is truly what you want…?”
Alaric squeezed my hand and I squeezed back, “It is.”
“Then I wish you all the happiness in this life—wherever it may take you, my daughter.”
And he signed.
“We did as you asked,” Kade hollered over the icy wind as we made our way down to the bay, “The Mad King’s offspring left on their own ship at dawn.”
“You’re being generous, it was a boat. A very small boat,” Tiernan said, crossing his arms.
Kade shrugged.
Finn came to take the satchel from my shoulder, “They didn’t seem to know much about sailing. I doubt they’ll make it far.”
“It isn’t our concern,” I said to him, “For Thana, I hope they make it somewhere and start a new life. One without… well, you know.”
He nodded, “I do,” he said, and turned to walk the gangplank up onto the small vessel, finishing up loading the rest of our things.
We’d hidden the Blessed Blade away in the bowels of the palace—left it in the hands of Morgana far below the ground. Strange, how easy it was to find her temple chamber when I had searched and searched before. I had a feeling it was only there when I needed it. And would reveal itself for no other. I hoped I was right.
The new Graces I’d stolen from the Mad King felt strange in my core, foreign. The Grace of shadow and that of earth—I wished I could give them back to the Fae they were stolen from. But that wasn’t possible. What I could do was promise their spirits one thing; I would use their Graces to do good. Or, perhaps, I wouldn’t use them at all.
I hoped I wouldn’t need to ever again.
A bout of nausea gripped me, and I swallowed back bile, curling my fist into my stomach.
“Not even on the ship yet and you’re already sea sick?” Finn said, coming back down to stand with us on the dock.
I smirked, blushing.
When I didn’t say anything, Alaric picked up on my emotions. The hesitation. The anxiety. The worry.
“What is it?” he asked me.
Steeling myself, I sucked in a long breath of the chill sea air. Tried to relax the tension in my shoulders.
Kade put a warm hand on my arm, and I flicked my face up to find his golden gaze staring warmly into me. He tugged gently at the tether holding us together through the Immortal Bond, “Are you alright?”
I smiled. Finding Tiernan’s jade green gaze just as warm and inviting as Kade’s. And Finn just as worried as Alaric.
What am I so afraid of?
“I-It’s not sea-sickness,” I starting, licking my dry lips, “It’s—oh what did Loris call it…? Right! That’s it, it’s morning sickness.”
Finn’s jaw dropped. Alaric, and Tiernan’s followed suit.
Kade cocked his head at me, making a strange face that told me he was the only one who had absolutely no idea what I was on about. “What?”
Finn shoved his brother, “She’s with child, you idiot.”
His face burned with a bright red flush, and his eyes glowed like molten steel. He turned to me, and the flush faded. The confused look morphing into the most brilliant smile I’d ever seen him wear. He charged in and lifted me from the dock, crushing me against his wide chest before setting me back down, leaving me off balance, staggering as I tried to find my footing on the wobbly wood.
I beamed at him, and I spun to find three more smiling faces and waiting embraces.
“I love you so much,” I said to all of them. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you right away—I didn’t… well I wasn’t sure how you would react.”
Because we’d never know who fathered the child for certain. We could guess, of course. But I didn’t want to. This child—our child would grow up with the love of four fathers. And I thought that was the most beautiful gift I could give my child.
Alaric pulled me against him, and I jolted. His emotions of excitement and pride rushing into me. And there was something else there, too. The love for his unborn son or daughter. I could already feel it within him—and if I reached out—within all of them.
The others crowed around us, wrapping their arms around Alaric and I until we were cocooned in warmth, shielded from the sun by my Draconian warrior’s great black wings.
It was time for another sort of adventure.
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Elena Lawson, The Queen's Consorts Box Set: A Reverse Harem Fantasy Trilogy
