It was obvious by the way she said it that Kara would indeed change her plans if Madeleine asked. They needed to support each other and their careers. That wouldn’t change for as long as they worked and wished to succeed. The amazing part was Kara intuitively understood that. Yes, she would have been disappointed to have her remain in New York for another six months, but she would have lived with it, as she had explained last night. The separations would always be hard on them, but with love and respect, not to mention their complete support of each other, they had committed with eyes wide open.
She never imagined it could be like this; the intuitive understanding, the heartfelt respect, but more than that, the way it felt to be loved completely. “Zip me up, honey?”
“As much as it’s killing me,” she joked, taking up the zipper on the long silky bottle green gown. “This is so perfect. It matches your eyes.”
Madeleine fingered the buttons on Kara’s tux shirt. It was a classic design but cut so low that just a half inch or so of the shirt collar was visible under the softly rounded silk lapels. She fingered the green buttons. “They look like the green stone on my bracelet,” she said, holding up her wrist to display her Amulette de Cartier Kara had given her way back in Las Vegas. A lifetime ago but in truth less than six months. “I can’t believe you turned my world around so fast. Honey, you are…”
“I’m yours. I love you. All I can do is support your work, support your hopes and aspirations, listen, love, and be yours. I hope that’s enough.”
“Enough?” she asked as Kara finished closing the zipper of the gown and smoothed her hands down Madeleine’s sides. “Honey, you are more than I will ever deserve,” she declared, turning and taking Kara in her arms. “I’ve been trying to put this into words for days now, but I’ll just have to give you the analytics and let you sort the numbers. Okay?”
At Kara’s grinning affirmative, she counted out as if making a presentation. “One, you showed me respect, even when you had zero reasons to. Two, you forgave my part in the fantasy date thing, even before you forgave your siblings. Next, you stayed true even when you had reason to believe I didn’t, but most of all, you gave me love, the kind I never imagined existed. Well, except in movies but then the lovers always die, a la Romeo and Juliet. And no way am I letting that happen for at least another sixty or so years, so…”
“Point four,” Kara interjected, “the promise of a sixty-year return would certainly sway the board, but it’s point three that I like best. Not the dying part but the love. I love you Madeleine, never Maddie. I never imagined I could. And you’re right. Not like this. I feel giddy, like a kid and happy all over. Is that silly?”
“Kara Wexler silly? I do believe I’ve been a very good influence on you.”
She felt as much as saw the last of the tension Kara had been carrying ease from her shoulders. “Ready?”
“I am,” she said, straightening Kara’s Windsor knot, hooking her arm and heading for the Clio Awards ceremony at Lincoln Center. Her company was up for several categories, but she was especially hopeful for one, last year’s Super S’hero hair color campaign. Kara had threatened to reveal the shade of her hair as the one color name rejected by the clients: Bad Ass Red Brass. Yes, walking through the hotel and later the Lincoln Center with Kara on her arm did make her feel a superhero.
That’s right, look at us. Bad Ass Red Brass and her partner and object of her affection was not Briar James or any other man the gossip sites suggested. It was Kara, her Kara, and for the first time in her life everything fit, everything made sense, but mostly everything just felt right.
She squeezed Kara’s arm as they made their way to join the rest of the Wexler party. “Just so you know, I love you too.”
Acknowledgments
Nia:wen’ ko:wa
What a strange and perfect phrase, Nia:wen’ ko:wa (pronounced: Nee-ah,wayn. Ko-wah). Loosely translated, it means Thank Them, Greatly. And I am so grateful.
This book, like each before and with the grace of all the universe those that will follow, is not a solo endeavor. Neither is it collective. We each have a part to play. Katherine V. Forrest is my editor. She is an extraordinary author and brings so much wisdom and insight to the process I can’t help but learn and grow. My thanks to her are endless. My publisher, Linda Hill, is an astonishing and discerning woman. I am so grateful for her inclusion and to be a part of the Bella Books family. Jessica Hill is another woman who deserves more than my simple thanks and my annual gift of maple syrup. Her enthusiasm for my work makes the long process of getting my thoughts on paper so worth the effort. There are others at Bella that deserve my thanks. Those women who work in the background, proofreading, formatting, designing covers, writing the jacket copy, sending out ARCs and so forth. Thank you each. Your efforts make a difference for me, and I suspect many, many women.
An Elder once told me a story is a gift, one compiled from the words long given to us. My job is to tell the story, allowing others to claim the content, word by word, for themselves. The truth is, we write stories to share both our real and imagined experiences, without which, real or imagined, we are nothing. Diving into lesbian fiction is about finding the women and experiences we crave. When I create a story world, it looks and sounds like the world we live in, but deeply bathed in hope. In these dark times, that hope must come from us no matter how exhausting or frustrating.
It’s our job to create the realities we desire.
When I feel the pain of these accelerated times, I look to the women around me for inspiration. You needn’t look far. Real change comes in small, almost inconsequential steps. And a positive word, character, or story, offers a far more lasting impact than political postulating could ever do. All change starts with action. All action starts with ideas, and all ideas are born from hope. LesFic is a safe place to look for that hope. We must see, hear, feel, taste, and fully experience the changes we want before they can take root. The women who devote their lives to this version of the literary craft are change makers. If that’s you too, read all you can, take these words for your own, and create the story-perfect lives we all deserve. It’s not easy, but it’s not impossible. Remember, small steps, just one word at a time, and change will happen.
I want to commend the board of the Golden Crown Literary Society. This group, with their laser focus on improving and promoting lesbian literature, host an annual conference where new and experienced, not to mention brave, would-be authors meet to learn and share. This camaraderie, especially among the Bella Books family, doesn’t just keep me writing; it keeps me reading. Yes, I still read LesFic every day. Why? These stories are our stories, however realistic, or fantastic. When we write for us, we create a legacy and not just for lesbians, or the LGBTQ2 community as a whole, but for all women who hold out hope for their future and the future of their children.
I want to send a special thanks to fellow author Laina Villeneuve, for agreeing that details matter; and chocolate. Love that Nova! MB Panichi for taking the time to chat with me about growing up in Minneapolis. Michelle Barrett for recognizing my Samson complex. Karin Kallmaker for her tutelage on text messaging, not to mention her kindness. KG MacGregor for letting me wax on about her wife, and Stefani Deoul for her unwavering support and her great laugh. Geneviève Fortin and wife Denice, for their warmth and welcoming hugs. And Mercedes Lewis, Mary Griggs, Ann Roberts, and the board, including all the volunteers at GCLS. Your efforts make a difference: transmittat; simul
I can’t leave out my biggest fans:
Kerry-Ann Kelly. I still can’t believe you can buy beer in cases of 60 bottles in QC or that you got three of them in Dawn’s car, even if you two did abandon me at the National Aviation Museum just to buy beer! Although I can’t think of a better place to spend an afternoon alone.
And Norma. I salute you! I deeply respect your service in uniform and on the bench. I can only hope I’ll be half as cool as you as a nonagenarian.
Finally, I need to thank my partner, Dawn. H
ow she puts up with me I do not know. As I sit at my desk, actually the dining room table, I can see nothing but stacks and stacks of papers, books, and a million other things. It should be declared a disaster zone. To her credit, tidy and neat Dawn walks by my mess a thousand times a day and never says a word, turning a permanently blind eye to my creative mess. Once this book is finally ready for release, she will sit with me and help me file and catalogue everything I’ve printed, found and scrounged to write this work. The table will be clean, and I’ll be ready to start something new. Let me make you a cup of tea, honey. It’s the least I can do until powwow season when I can get you some fry bread and strawberry juice. Always know, you, your patience and your support are what I need to do the work I do. Without you there would never be this book or any other.
Nia:we
A Note on Music
In this book I mentioned three numbers performed by my character Madeleine Jessepp. I’ll admit it, I’m not so much an audiophile as an old school rocker. When my editor, Katherine V. Forrest, suggested I name the songs Madeleine performed I was lost. Let’s face it, there isn’t much in the way of torch songs from Heart, BTO, the Guess Who, or Robbie Robertson. To find songs that expressed the feelings growing between my characters I wasted a day on YouTube with no results. My partner, however, knows her music. It took her all of ten minutes to compile this list. I share it here because it’s worth repeating.
Enjoy.
“Mad About You”
Composition by Paula Jean Brown, James Whelan and Mitchel Young Evans. Performed by Belinda Carlisle on her debut album.
“It’s All In The Game”
Composition by Carl Sigman and Charles G. Dawes. First performed by Tommy Edwards in 1951. The version my wife played for me was recorded by Carmel in 1987
“The Look Of Love”
Composition by Burt Bacharach, Lyrics by Hal David. It was first performed by Dusty Springfield in 1967, and also released that same year by Bacharach himself. Another interesting version is from Isaac Hayes, but it is the Diana Krall, 2001 release I’m familiar with and the one my wife played for me.
A Note on Creating an Advertising Agency
When I first penned the idea of an exemplary advertising executive, my mind went immediately to David Ogilvy, founder of legendary advertising company Ogilvy and Mather. Known as the man who wrote the rules of advertising, even when credited with saying, “I hate rules,” this eclectic Englishman, and pioneer of the craft, got his start just down the street from my home in Whitby, Ontario, at the one-time Allied secret spy school, Camp X. It seems ironic that a man known as the icon of “gentlemanliness,” trained alongside characters like OSS Commander, William J. (Wild Bill) Donovan, Col. US Army; James Bond creator, Commander Ian Fleming, RN; Hollywood leading man Stirling Hayden; and even infamous double agent Kim Philby. Where Ogilvy’s story diverts from his cohorts was in purpose. He recognized the effect propaganda had on the German public and proposed fighting fire with fire. Legend is he created fake news reels, which the SOE then arranged to have “accidentally” fall into enemy hands. It’s alleged one such reel included a visit to the fake Allied pre-D-Day invasion army holding site in Calais, leading the German command to believe the cross channel attack would come from that location.
After the war, the film unit he built was considered too valuable to lose and with the Canadian government not imagining a use for propaganda films, they refocused on using it as the seed of what would become the National Film Board of Canada. Ogilvy left the NFB in good hands and established his advertising agency with offices in Toronto and his HQ in New York. What I respect about Ogilvy most and wanted to instill in my character was his treatise to, “Treat everyone with intelligence and grace.” He is quoted as famously reminding his writers, “The consumer isn’t a moron; she is your wife!”
When I created Kara Wexler, I wanted her to be the embodiment of everything good David brought to the business, and her father all that was wrong with it. Of course, real life isn’t so earnest, but this is fiction and what the hell, it’s how I imagine a little on the short side, a little on the awkward side, gentlewoman to be.
A Note to My Readers
I always like to hear what my readers think. I really do. If you enjoyed Cause and Affection, please consider returning to your retailer and leaving a review. If you hated it, why not send me a note and let me know why?
Sheryl Wright ([email protected])
To learn more about me or read the irreverent and stray thoughts that make it into my blog, please visit https://sherylwright.com
Want to read more of my work, or explore the most complete and exemplary catalogue of lesbian fiction? Then I suggest you visit Bella Books at https://www.bellabooks.com.
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Cause and Affection Page 25
