"Where's your car?"
"Out of sight. Getting a little cranky, are we?"
"I'm getting a little tired of your nonanswers."
Nathan opened the door slowly. When she stepped up to go inside first, he stopped her with his hand. "Stay behind me."
"No problem," she muttered. "You'll give me a better target that way."
The tired sigh he expelled spawned a twinge of guilt over snapping at him. He was an operative of some type with elite training. Common sense said to let him go in first, but her pride was tired of being trounced lately.
"Don't fight me on this, Terri." His whisper sounded exhausted. How many days had he been on the run all this time? Where had he been sleeping? At the Drake house? Not a safe place for him to hang around.
She caved. "Go ahead."
When Nathan entered, she followed and tried to match his stealth, which was not as simple as she'd thought. Within a few minutes, he led her back to the kitchen and let her turn on the vent light over the stove.
Terri dropped her purse on the counter and noticed a small black gym bag on the floor by the door. She ignored it for the moment and turned to him.
Nathan pulled a chair out and sat down, propping his elbow on the table to support his head.
Now that she could see him better, he did look whipped, probably from stress as much as lack of sleep. But she needed to know more about him. She'd let her emotions get tangled up and couldn't keep walking this tight rope.
He was either a criminal or not.
She was either going to trust him or not.
"Go ahead. Ask whatever you've got on your mind," he said.
"I need to know if you're a criminal."
"It depends."
She wanted to scream. "Stop giving me cryptic answers. I'm standing here talking to a man who was on a slab in a morgue a week ago. I've been meeting you more than halfway. You've got to give me at least that much, too."
He scrubbed his hand over the shadow of a beard on his jaw, then raked his fingers through his hair and sat up, crossing his arms. "You saw my brother's body. Jamie."
Terri scrunched her eyebrows together. "How can that be? He's still in prison."
"I told you it was complicated. The more I tell you, the more complicated it gets because then you'll have to decide who to believe, me or… everyone else."
She leaned back against the countertop, taking in what he was offering. He made it her choice to become more involved with him than she already was. If she asked for the rest of what he held back, she might have to choose which side of an invisible line to stand on at some pointhis or the law's.
He'd stepped into harm's way to protect her. Had been willing to give himself up to Marseaux in exchange for her.
She'd played by the rules for a long time and been burned. Maybe it was time to gamble on her instincts again. She'd let him talk, then decide what to do with what he told her.
"I want to hear everything," she said. He nodded. "Jamie and I are identical twins." She had a bone to pick with Brady He'd failed to share that little detail. In fact, that should have shown up on Sammy's computer search on the family. Why hadn't that been in the records? "Go on."
"I was in the military two years ago when Marseaux screwed Jamie over."
"So your brother was running drugs for Marseaux?"
"No." Nathan's point-blank tone allowed no argument. "Jamie didn't so much as take aspirin and only drank an occasional beer. He was a straight arrow and smart as a whip, brilliant, in fact."
The admiration in his voice plunked her heartstrings. "So how did he get involved with Marseaux?"
"Dad died when we were eight, so it was just the three of us. I went into the military as soon as I was old enough, thinking I'd put away enough money for Jamie to go to college and I'd get in on the GI bill. He had the grades, but he couldn't find anywhere that would offer a full ride. While I was gone, the city condemned the area where he and my mom were living. The house wasn't much, but she owned it. They needed more money to get another place."
"I know how hard it has been since Katrina. I'm lucky Grandma has been here for so long. What did your mother do about a house?"
"I was on a mission, out of touch, or I would have come up with a plan. Jamie went to one of Marseaux's supposedly legit businesses, an investment group, to get a loan. The manager said the loan was questionable, but if Jamie worked for one of the companies they owned stock in, he'd have a better chance with his limited credit. Jamie was brilliant, but naive. The classic genius who needed help tying his own shoes." Nathan smiled, his eyes staring at nothing in particular as a warm memory flitted past his gaze.
Terri waited for him to continue, but was starting to get a bad feeling about where this was going.
"Anyhow, Jamie found out too late he'd stumbled into a snake pit and was expected to mule drugs. He walked away, something no one does to Marseaux, because he assumes you're going to rat on him. So next thing I know, Jamie is calling to tell me he's a week from being convicted and sent to prison. Plus, we'd just found out that mom had ovarian cancer."
Damn, she couldn't imagine having all that dumped into her lap at once. "I'm sorry," she whispered, not sure if he even heard her.
"I left the military to… take his place."
She stilled at his words. "You mean you came home to take care of your mother?"
"No." Nathan leaned forward and propped his forearms on his knees and dropped his head. "I took Jamie's place the last week of the trial."
She couldn't fathom what he was saying at first, then the whole picture hit her. "You did his time? Two years in prison?"
Terri had stepped forward, struggling to understand why any person would willingly go to prison. "Why?"
His head shot up. He stood, towering over her. Imposing and hurting. "Why? Jamie would never have survived. He'd have been dead in a week, if that long. Our mother needed someone here and I ..." His Adam's apple moved with a hard swallow. The pain swimming in his eyes broke her in half. "Unlike him, I knew how to survive. I had to protect them."
But who'd protected Nathan?
He'd gone to prison to keep his brother alive. Most people could only dream of that kind of love and devotion. She could imagine the anguish over finding out, after all, that Jamie had been killed.
How had Nathan held on to his sanity?
Terri moved forward and he stepped away, wary as a caged animal. "Everyone is not your enemy, Nathan. Someone might be willing to help you if you'd step out from behind those walls."
"You can't help me. I don't want you involved with what I'm doing."
How could she reach a man who believed that? How long had he fought the world alone? Terri wrapped her arms around her chest, stifling the urge to just hug him.
"If that's the case, why did you kiss me?"
"I shouldn't have."
"That's not what I asked. Why did you kiss me?"
"The same reason I had to smell you that first time. I want you." He stared at her, searching her face, then added, "But I won't act on that. You have my word."
His blunt honesty touched her. He could have come up with a list of excuses, but chose the hard truth. And she bet it was difficult for him to admit he wanted anything for himself.
That he wanted her took her breath away. She definitely wanted him.
Nathan shook his head. "I shouldn't have kissed you, I'm going to protect you while we figure out what Marseaux is after, I need you to do as I ask and not take risks, I don't want you hurt."
But he was willing to bleed for everyone he cared about. Emotions closed her throat. Her common sense and law-enforcement training did nothing to sway her from moving forward to wrap her arms around him.
"No," He stood rigid as a statue.
"Yes." She rubbed her hand up and down his back, hugging herself to him with her other arm.
He didn't move for another few seconds, then the tension in him snapped. He hugged her to him with a desperation she doubted h
e'd ever exposed before.
Terri continued to soothe him, hoping to ease the deep misery. He'd thanked her for letting him hold her the other night. How long had it been since anyone had held him?
Two years of surviving in prison only to walk out into a bitter world where he'd lost everyone he'd ever cared about.
Terri flinched at the brutality. At the pain he must carry with him every step of the way. Just like her.
She'd never known her father. He fled as soon as he found out her mother was pregnant and had never come back. Her first year in the DEA, she'd looked into him only to find out he'd died years ago from a drug overdose.
Terri had been a teen when she lost her mother and had thought she'd never get past the heartache, but she'd learned to live with it because of Grandma, who had held her and loved her.
Nathan had nobody.
He lifted a hand to her hair, smoothing her curls over and over again. He kissed the top of her head. She leaned her head back and stared up into his gray-blue eyes.
"Now you know why I didn't want to tell you," he said. "You asked if I'm a criminal? I went AWOL, defrauded the government, and am technically an ex-con with a record, too. That's why I said the answer depends on your point of view."
Brady had said Nathan was MIA, but she couldn't share that without divulging a confidence with a DEA agent.
"Did Stoner know you when you went AWOL?"
He nodded." We were on a four-man mission that we'd just completed and were to be picked up the next day, which meant going to debrief. Would have tied me up for a minimum of ten days. Then it would have taken even longer to get approved for leave to go home to Jamie and Mom. I left Stoner a sign that I was gone and wouldn't be back."
"But he covered your back tonight." She wanted the significance of that to sink in.
"Yes. He's the only person I've ever trusted, besides my brother."
"What about me? Don't you trust me?"
He captured each side of her face with his hands and stared at her with those stormy eyes. "Given what all I've shared tonight, you should know that answer."
Terri smiled. She wasn't sure how this would play out, but she couldn't label him a criminal by her definition.
"I have to stay out of sight around you or you'll be in a worse situation trying to explain me."
He was right about that. "You need to stay out of sight until we figure out who killed your brother and who wants you dead." She felt his loss deeply, and the last thing she wanted was for him to be hurt anymore. "I'm so sorry about Jamie."
He nodded. His eyes were shiny. "Me, too."
"Do you know where his, um, body is?"
His eyes went dead. "Yes. I took his body to someone who buried him properly in a crypt, a friend whose dad had known ours. I wasn't letting anyone cut up my brother in an autopsy. Add that to my crimes."
And Nathan was back to a hard tone, but she was starting to realize how much easier it was for him to expect condemnation than understanding. "Do you know who killed him?"
"Not yet, but I will." The cold determination in his voice sent a shiver down her spine.
"Do you know what Jamie was doing with Marseaux?" Terri had to be careful not to share anything she'd heard from Brady. She might not be on good terms with the DEA, but she wouldn't screw over Brady.
"Not much. I visited a couple of Marseaux's associates who said Jamie was working in the shipping office, but nothing unusual. I just don't know why he would go to work for one of Marseaux's fronts."
Because the DEA cut a deal with him to go undercover, because they thought Jamie was you and that he could help you get out of a sentence he got you into. Damn, that sucked. How on earth would Nathan deal with that joyous news?
It would kill him.
She knew she should tell him, but she couldn't bring herself to hurt him anymore. God knows he'd been hurt enough. All she wanted to do now was protect him and get him out of this mess alive.
And to keep him out of jail.
She rubbed her cheek against his shoulder. "So you don't think Jamie knew anything about Marseaux being involved?"
"I think he did by the time he died, but I don't know if he did when he went to work at the shipping company. If he had, I don't understand why he would have taken a job there. Not after what we'd done to keep him out of prison."
She squeezed her eyes shut. He was trying to get you out of prison. Sharing that would leave Nathan more raw than he was now. Nathan had offered more about Marseaux's operation than she'd gotten from anyone else, but he wasn't finished. Where would he turn that anger when he learned all the truth?
"Nathan?" She carefully hid her concern. "Did he leave you any clues as to why someone targeted him?"
"Not really. I have the note you saw on the fridge that makes me believe he had an idea he might be in danger. There was an insignia on the back of it."
"What type of insignia?"
He fished the note out of his back pocket, unfolded the yellow paper, and flipped it over.
Terri stared at the line drawing of a design she'd only seen one other time. Conroy had shown her the same logo in gold on the corner of expensive linen paper she hadn't been able to track.
At Nathan's silence, she raised her eyes to his expectant gaze, obviously waiting for her to be more forthcoming. Her partner had died right after discovering the paper and sharing his intel with her. Too many things were coming at her. She'd hit the limit of what she could comfortably reveal, but had a bona fide reason for not turning Nathan in or telling BAD more than she deemed necessary. He was her new trusted informant.
"What do you know about Jamie's death?" he asked.
"I saw your brother's body in the morgue for about fifteen minutes. I heard speculation he was working for Marseaux and that he may have tried to cross up a drug deal."
Wrong thing to suggest.
Nathan's steel gray-gaze turned stormy black. "Jamie would never work for"
"Hey, I said I heard speculation, not that I thought he was a drug runner. I never even met your brother."
Nathan leaned back hard. A sigh escaped. "Sorry, I'm just sure whatever involvement he had with Marseaux was innocent."
"Did he leave any more notes?"
"I believe he would have, but I haven't found them."
"That's why the drawers were open in your mother's house."
"Yes, but Jamie wouldn't leave notes in places so easy to find. We always had a joint hiding place for valuables in other houses. I never lived in this one. I don't know where he put anything he wanted to keep safe, but I know he would have left me information… somewhere."
Terri took in the worry and exhaustion lines around Nathan's beautiful eyes. He needed rest. She wouldn't press him further right now. Angling her head toward the door, she asked, "Is that your bag over there?"
"I'm staying here tonight. I can bunk on the floor."
"What if I say no?"
"I'll just break in after you go to sleep and still bunk on the floor."
She stifled a smile at the irritation those words evoked. She didn't doubt his words for a minute. Brady would warn her she was asking for trouble she could ill afford, but she'd taken bigger risks as a teen than letting a stranger sleep on her floor for one night. Especially a man who had saved her butt more than once and might be the key to unlocking this investigation.
"Why don't you get a shower, then I'll take one?" Terri suggested.
"I have a better idea. Join me."
* * *
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
Join me? As in join me to take a shower? Terri blinked, at an immediate loss for how to respond to Nathan's bold request. "No" was the correct answer if she could get her brain and her body to agree. She should be laying down some basic guidelines for cohabitating, not considering how much she'd like to see that body in full commando.
The conscience she'd developed since coming to live with her grandmother had to be the only reason her next words were, "I don't think so."
Yeah, of course. In what universe would this gorgeous guy ever be interested in seeing her naked? He acted as though he'd wanted her in the dark, but in the light of day? Maybe not.
She struggled to find a cute comeback to hide the embarrassment heating her face. He saved her the trouble when his gaze drifted up and down her with an undisguised intimacy. "You can turn your back when I step out… or not."
More than her face was hot now. Don't even think about sitting that close to all that male, unclothed with steamy water running down every cut of his hard body. Take a breath and set him straightyet againon how this is going to work. "I appreciate your concern, but I'm pretty sure the worst thing that will happen to me without you is a paper cut. We need to respect each other's space if you're going to stay here tonight."
There was that tiny hint of a smile on his face again. He still doubted her skills.
She should have shot him when she had the chance. "Towels are in the bathroom closet."
"I'll be right back." He walked away and disappeared into the living room, then returned just as quickly and locked the kitchen door. "Both doors are secure. Are there any unlocked windows?"
"No." She stuck a hand on her hip. "Want to set up a perimeter monitoring system while we're at it? I know where an after hours electronics store is."
"Good idea. Then I can construct an RFID chip to inject you with so that I can monitor your whereabouts twenty-four/seven."
She rolled her eyes at him. He was relentless. "Whatever. Take your bath so I can." She grabbed her purse on the way out of the room and deposited it inside the doorway to her bedroom, then headed down the hallway. She retrieved a towel and washcloth from the linen closet on the way, then stepped into the narrow bathroom.
Grandma had upgraded a few things over the years with the exception of this one room. Her eighty-year-old house hadn't changed much, which meant there was barely enough room in the small space for one person.
Just another reason why Terri had no intentions of sitting in this room while Nathan showered. Naked. Wet. Gorgeous.
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