A Christmas to Remember

by Katie Flynn

  ‘But if you get a job, any job, you’ll still have to leave her,’ the headmaster pointed out. ‘However, I think I can guess what you’re going to say. If you can earn sufficient money to pay someone to keep an eye on your grandmother while you’re at work you would be able to keep body and soul together, which wouldn’t be possible if you stayed with us, since I never heard of any school paying a pupil to study. How about evenings? I’ve heard you mention a Mr Payne . . .’

  ‘Oh, yes, Mr Payne’s wonderful, but he’s got his own business to run, and can’t neglect it,’ Tess said. ‘He’ll give all the help he possibly can, but he can’t be in two places at once. I don’t imagine we shall find a flat or even a couple of rooms to rent in the centre of the city, near Mr Payne’s shop. We’ll have to move out to the suburbs where rents are cheaper.’

  The headmaster looked thoughtful. ‘Have you considered evening classes? Or even a correspondence course? It’s perfectly possible to gain the results you would need for university entrance by either of these methods, though of course it would take longer.’

  Tess smiled at him. ‘I wouldn’t go to university and leave my gran completely alone unless she was very much better and more capable,’ she said quietly. ‘But thank you for the suggestion; I really will think seriously about it. In the meantime though, I’m afraid I shan’t be able to come back to school next month.’

  The headmaster sighed. ‘A pity, a great pity,’ he murmured, ‘but I feel sure you will make a success of whatever you decide to do, Miss Williams.’ He held out a lean, well-manicured hand. ‘Goodbye, and good luck.’

  The following evening Tess made her way to the hospital alone. She should have felt disappointed, even cheated, but as she had walked away from the interview with the headmaster the previous evening she had been aware only of an overwhelming sensation of relief. She knew, none better, that she had had to study harder than ever in her life before just to get her School Cert. Maths had always been her weakest subject, and the thought of having to tackle Latin as well gave her nightmares. When she had taken Jonty to the station the previous week they had missed the train he had intended to catch, with the result that they had had an hour to kill and had spent it in the refreshment room where they had seriously discussed Tess’s future.

  She had admitted to Jonty what she would have told no one else, that she had only gone in for the scholarship in the first place in order to make Snowy eat his words, because he had told people that she was just a brainless little nobody who wasn’t bright enough to get it. Also, Gran had told her that no one else in her family had gone to university, and she knew how proud it would make Gran if she succeeded. ‘But I’m not academic, not really,’ she had confessed to Jonty as they sat at a corner table in the refreshment room, sipping coffee and eating rather unappetising station buns. ‘So if I’m honest, I shan’t be a bit sorry to find myself a proper job. I might take evening classes in something useful – business management, for example – but I shan’t even think about university because I’m absolutely certain that even if I did get all the exams and things I’d be completely out of my depth.’

  Jonty had leaned across the table and patted her cheek. ‘You don’t need exams to be a farmer’s wife, nor a course in business studies,’ he had said. ‘In fact all you need is a suitable farmer, preferably one called Jonty Bell. And us Bells would take good care of your gran, you know that, don’t you? She’d be looked after like a queen, with no worries about rent or ice cream parlours or Mr Payne not being the pushy sort. I know I can’t give you much right now, but one of these days I’ll be offering to share all my worldly goods with you, so don’t go doing anything foolish. Promise?’

  ‘I’ll promise not to do anything foolish, but I don’t mean to be anyone’s wife until I’ve had a career of my own and a lot of fun,’ Tess had said. ‘And besides, what about this Melissa girl? Haven’t you offered her your hand and your heart? As well as the rest of your gorgeous body, of course.’

  Jonty had laughed. ‘She’s just a friend,’ he had said airily, just as his train steamed into the platform.

  Tess had jumped to her feet and grabbed the lightest of Jonty’s bags. ‘No more tomfoolery or you’ll miss another train,’ she had said briskly. ‘Come along, Jonty, let’s see if we can get you a corner seat; not that it matters much because Crewe is your first change, and that’s only thirty minutes away.’ They had reached the train, Tess handing over her penny platform ticket to be clipped, and had managed to get Jonty a corner seat despite the train’s being crowded. Jonty had put his haversack on the worn upholstery, then hopped down on to the platform again and pecked her cheek.

  ‘Don’t forget that my offer was serious,’ he’d said huskily. ‘You’re a grand girl.’

  ‘I know I am; I’m worth two of you,’ Tess had joked breathlessly. ‘If I go down to the box on the corner at eight o’clock this evening will you telephone, just to let me know you’ve arrived safely and everything’s all right at the farm?’

  ‘Of course I will,’ Jonty had said, and was beginning to remind Tess to thank Albert once again for his hospitality when a porter had come along the platform slamming doors and Jonty had had to leap back into his carriage. Almost at once the train had begun to move and Tess, waving until it was out of sight, had felt suddenly bereft. She was really fond of Jonty; he would probably always be her best friend, and it had been very good of him to leave the farm and come home with her, but she could scarcely expect him to stay on once he knew Gran to be out of danger. And there was, after all, little he could do to help her with her most pressing problem, which was finding accommodation, for when the landlord repossessed the flat in a couple of weeks she would have to live in cheap lodgings until she found somewhere they could afford.

  But right now she knew she must concentrate on the coming interview with Gran, in which she intended to tell the older woman that she had, admittedly accidentally, seen Edie’s birth certificate. She was still wondering how to approach such a ticklish subject when she reached the ward, and after their initial greeting and the handing over, on Tess’s part, of a small bunch of hothouse grapes Gran looked up into Tess’s eyes, indicated that she should sit down on the visitor’s bench, and opened the subject herself.

  ‘You know, don’t you?’ she said quietly. ‘Albert said yesterday that you had been giving him strange looks ever since you took him my document wallet. It doesn’t take a genius to work out that you saw something in it to make you suspect that you’ve been told an untruth.’ She smiled at the younger girl. ‘I’ve been wondering what on earth it could be, but that really doesn’t matter now. What matters is that I must come clean. Please don’t be cross with me, darling Tess; whatever I did I did for the best.’

  Tess leaned over and took Edie’s hand. ‘We’ll both stick to the truth from now on,’ she said gently. ‘And I’ll start by telling you that I didn’t look inside the wallet on purpose. I didn’t close the clasp properly and when I picked it up several papers fell out. Oh, Gran, I saw your birth certificate! You were born in 1905, weren’t you? And since I was born in ‘33 that would make you an awfully young grandmother, isn’t that so?’

  Gran sighed. ‘Yes, you’re quite right, but that’s not the case because, dearest Tess, I’m not your grandmother at all. I never had children; my husband, darling Fred, and I wanted a family, but he died after we’d only been married for two years. Your real grandmother and I were friends, though she was twenty years older than me, and I knew she’d had a daughter who’d died and a granddaughter who’d been evacuated. So when she died just before the end of the war it seemed to me that you looked like ending up in a children’s home. When you evacuees came home in September ’45, I went to the dispersal point to see who would claim you, and there you were, looking so lost and bewildered that my heart went out to you. When the social services officer called out your name – Theresa Jane Williams – and asked if there was an Edith Williams present I stepped forward, and from the look on your face it
was as though the sun had suddenly come out. You said “Gran!” and I said “Tess!” and that set the seal on it. I had intended to tell the officer the truth, of course, but I didn’t because with that one hug I knew I had what I most wanted: a little girl I could love and guide, a companion who was also my dead friend’s grandchild. After that it was plain sailing. I was Edith Williams, the same as your real gran, and you were Tess Williams.’ She pulled a rueful face. ‘And now I suppose you’re going to desert me and go off in search of proof that your mother really is dead, or even to try to find your father, although I’m not sure that even your real grandmother knew who he was, because I’m told that that’s what adopted children usually do, and I suppose, in a way, you could be considered my adopted granddaughter.’

  Tess had been holding Gran’s hand, but now she transferred herself with great care to the edge of the bed and gave Edie a hug. ‘Now that I know the true story I shall love you more than ever!’ she declared. ‘I’ve always known you saved me from a children’s home, but I thought you had little choice because of our relationship. People would have thought badly of you if you’d left your real granddaughter to be brought up by strangers, but what you’ve shown is real love, the sort of love that Ruth shows to Naomi in the Bible.’

  ‘Then you’ll stay with me, queen?’ Gran said, her voice breaking. ‘Of course, as you grow older you’ll want to leave the nest as all little birds do, but right now—’

  ‘Right now I wouldn’t leave you for a thousand pounds,’ Tess assured the older woman, ‘but if you ask me the boot is going to be on the other foot. I wouldn’t be surprised if Albert were to ask you—’

  ‘He already has asked me, and I’ve told him that I’m happy with our friendship but you and I don’t need anyone else,’ Edie said. ‘Dear me, I feel as though a physical burden has been lifted off my back. And now that we both know everything, I want to talk about something else entirely. Albert told me you went to see your headmaster yesterday, and I can guess what you said to him. You’re not going back to school, are you?’ When Tess shook her head she went on, ‘Oh, I’d give anything not to have been on that wretched bus. If I wasn’t stuck here like this you’d be getting ready to start working towards your Higher any day now, and as it is . . .’ She sighed and patted Tess’s hand. ‘I feel so guilty, because as you know I promised myself that I would support you right up to and including university. I knew it would be a struggle but I thought I could manage it somehow, especially if you got holiday work. And to tell you the truth, Albert has very decently offered to give us some financial support which, if you insisted, you could pay back once you’re earning real money.’

  Tess had felt a pang of apprehension when Gran had referred to marriage and Albert in the same breath, and now she felt another pang. If she accepted help from Albert it would be an admission that she and Gran were not a self-sufficient little family, and she had no desire to have to share, perhaps especially after the revelation that Edie Williams was not related to her in any way. So she shook her head. ‘It’s awfully kind of Albert – he’s a very kind man – but I don’t mean to take money from anyone, and now that I’m not continuing with my schooling I very much hope it won’t be necessary, because I mean to get full-time work. Any more questions?’

  ‘Yes: any luck on the house-hunting front?’ Gran asked. ‘Time is not on our side. Albert has actually offered to move into a hostel so that we can take over his flat if we find ourselves on the street. But I know you wouldn’t like that, and neither would I. So, any ideas?’

  Tess sat back on the bench, shaking her head. ‘No, I’m afraid not. Did I tell you that the person who was going to take on the milliner’s shop and the flat has dropped out? The landlord, Mr Egbert, was quite nice about it really. He said he felt mean asking us to vacate the premises whilst you were still recovering in hospital. So now we’ve got a breathing space, because he’ll have to re-advertise and so on.’

  ‘What about Miss Foulks, though?’ Gran asked. ‘She was going to leave at the end of last week. She’d made all her arrangements to move in with her sister.’

  ‘Oh, she’s already gone. There was no point in her hanging on since she had virtually no stock left to sell anyway,’ Tess explained. ‘It’s rather annoying in a way because I told everyone that we’d let them know our change of address as soon as we know it ourselves, but in the meantime would they send all letters, invoices, bills et cetera to Mr Albert Payne, the tobacconist.’ She laughed. ‘Poor Albert, he’ll be getting a bumper post for a while, but he says he doesn’t mind. Oh, Gran, you’ve no idea how lonely it is in the flat without you! It wasn’t so bad when Jonty was staying at Albert’s because they either came round to our place or I went round to theirs in the evenings. But now when I’m not at work I’m on my own most of the time except when I’m here at the hospital.’

  ‘What about Snowy?’ Gran asked. She beamed. ‘I like Snowy. He brings me presents.’

  Tess sniggered. ‘A bag of acid drops and you’re anyone’s,’ she declared. ‘But you’re right, I do see quite a bit of him. But of course that will all stop when he goes off to university in October.’

  Gran raised her eyebrows. ‘Goes away? What’s wrong with Liverpool, may I ask? He has a cousin working on this ward, so he’s been able to get permission to pop in and see me in the afternoons, and he told me he’d almost decided to go to our very own place of learning, in other words Liverpool University. Hasn’t he told you that? I only wish you were heading in the same direction, and it’s all my fault that you’re not. Snowy will go on to greater things whilst you, my darling, will lose the chance I’ve always wanted for you: to go to university and get a degree.’

  Tess shook her head. ‘I’m not clever enough really, Gran; the work was already beginning to get me down. And you know Snowy, or must do by this time. He waffles airily on about choosing between Oxford and Cambridge, but I believe most of their intake is from Eton and Harrow and places like that. And anyway, don’t they have their own entrance requirements? I think settling for red brick is probably a good idea, since it will mean he can live at home and save his money. I think he’s going to do a maths degree, or maybe physics and chemistry, but anyway something which would bore the rest of us rigid. Still, it’s nice of him to visit you, Gran.’

  ‘And to bring me little presents,’ Gran said smugly. ‘Last time he came he brought a bag of luscious William pears, which we shared.’ She looked through her lashes at the younger girl. ‘He likes you, Tess, honest to God he does. He likes to talk about you and he’ll be really disappointed when you tell him you aren’t bound for university after all.’

  Tess sniffed. ‘My life is my own and none of his business,’ she said grandly. ‘I wonder how he’ll feel . . . but I won’t say any more. I’ll save it for when it’s a fact.’

  When she returned from the hospital she decided to nip up to Albert’s, since she wanted to discuss her flat-hunting plans with him. As it happened, Albert was still in his shop and he welcomed her with a broad smile when he saw her peering at him through the glass panel in his door.

  ‘Gran all right?’ he asked as he unlocked the door and ushered her inside. ‘How did she take the news that she’s had a reprieve? On the flat front, I mean. It must have relieved her mind.’

  ‘Oh, it did,’ Tess assured him. ‘I told her Mr Egbert was awfully nice about it, more or less said he wouldn’t make too much of an effort to re-let the property while she was still in hospital. I say, Albert, you’re working awfully late. Have you had your supper yet?’

  Albert had sat down on his stool again whilst they talked, but now he stretched and yawned and Tess could see the lines of tiredness around his eyes, and guessed that he had been working on his books ever since closing the shop at six. ‘No, not yet,’ he admitted. ‘But I think I’ve done enough for today. I’ll go up and have a cup of tea and a piece of toast. Care to join me?’

  Tess’s conscience smote her. Albert had provided her with food on several occas
ions. He had put himself out not just for Gran but for Tess herself, and she had never thought to repay him. But now was her chance. Earlier in the day she had bought a meat and potato pie from Deering’s – they always charged her staff rates – and she had stewed a quantity of apples and intended to make a custard to go with them as a pudding. So now she smiled at Albert and shook her head. ‘Thanks, Albert, but you can jolly well save your toast for tomorrow because I’ve got one of Deering’s meat and potato pies which is far too big for one, so I hereby invite you to share my supper. We can talk while we eat, because I want to ask you about looking for property in the suburbs.’

  Albert sighed. ‘I know it’s the sensible thing to do really, because now that Edie won’t be returning to Deering’s there’s nothing to stop you moving out of the centre, except that I’ll miss you both dreadfully,’ he said. ‘And I accept your kind invitation. I’ll just nip up to the flat and make sure I’ve not left a pan on the stove.’

  He and Tess parted and Tess hurried along to the flat above the milliner’s shop. As always, the minute she climbed the stair and unlocked the door she was aware of how much she missed Gran. Even the flat misses her, she thought ruefully, going over to the oven, lighting it and popping the pie inside to warm. Not so long ago, Gran would have been there, boiling the kettle for tea, slicing and buttering bread and asking Tess all about her day. But how different it was now! The kitchen was cold and still smelt faintly musty, and Tess, looking guiltily round the room, told herself that she’d have to pull her socks up before Gran came out of hospital. The draining board was cluttered with her porridge dishes for the past week, the sink was full of pots and pans, and a loaf of bread, a small block of margarine and various other items were scattered across the kitchen table, the Welsh dresser and the draining board. I’m becoming a slut, Tess told herself guiltily. When Jonty was here I kept the place reasonably tidy, but because no one sees it but me I’ve let things slide. I’ll have to make it a habit to ask Albert in for a meal two or three times a week, she told herself. After all, he’s as much my friend as Gran’s. I might even ask Snowy to come up for a game of cards, or just for a natter. Gran’s quite right, it’s been kind of him to visit her; it relieves her boredom. Yes, from now on I’ll be a changed person.