First, pain to break down the barriers, followed by pleasure to bring them back together.
“I don’t want to do this,” he said resolutely. “But when you ended our relationship without discussion, you disrespected our partnership, my authority, everything we were building.”
She nodded, her lower lip between her teeth.
“To start with a clean slate, I’m going to punish you. Got any questions about why?”
Her shoulders tensed, and yet she shook her head. Her quick glance at his bag made him smile. Newer submissives worried about impact toys, never realizing a spanking could sting even worse.
“No toys, pet.” He patted his thighs. “Right here; right now.”
Her arms closed around her waist in a telling fashion. Breaking up had hurt her badly, even if she’d been the one to do it. Now her subconscious was trying to keep a distance between them.
Too bad. He wouldn’t permit any distance…which was why he wanted the intimacy of a bare-ass, bare-hand spanking. “Now.”
He’d seen snails move faster. Finally she draped herself over his knees. Hands flat on the floor, toes on the other side. Damn, she had the sweetest ass. Soft and heart shaped. “I’m sorry to have to do this, Lindsey,” he said. “I hate hurting you when you don’t enjoy it…and you’re not going to like this.”
No warm-up. No fun. He simply gripped her shoulder and started smacking her ass. Hard and fast, one cheek followed by the other. It only took a few slaps to have her squirming and kicking. She rose up, trying to use her hand to protect her butt—so he captured her wrist, pinned it in the small of her back, and continued.
She struggled harder. “Dammit, stop. I don’t like you anymore. Let me go!”
No safeword. He stopped to rub her buttocks briefly, letting her hope he was done, letting the nerves recover. And he started again. Slap, slap, slap.
She fought to kick him. “You fucking asshole. I h-hate you!”
He closed his eyes, breathing through the pain of her words. Didn’t mean them; he knew it. Still hurt. “I’m unhappy you feel that way, babe.” He spanked her, not harder. Not softer. Seemed like forever.
She broke, her sobs filling the room, shaking her shoulders. “I’m s-s-sorry, Zander. I’m sorry.”
Thank fucking God. He stopped, pulling in air through his nose. After a minute, he managed to unclench his jaw. “God, baby, I don’t like this. Don’t make me do this again.” Why the hell had it been so hard to punish her? He was fucking known as the Enforcer in Dark Haven. Jesus, hopefully someone would shoot him before he ever had to discipline her again.
Her crying didn’t stop, but she nodded her agreement.
Eventually, his guts settled. “Tell me what you learned, Lindsey.”
She sniffled. “I-I-if I hear something, I talk to you about it. And we discuss what’s wrong between us.”
He considered. “Yeah, that covers it.” With a feeling of relief, he boosted her up and set her in his lap. She didn’t pull away but buried her face in his shoulder and cried. Yet even as she did, she relied on him to hold her. Comfort her.
Jesus, yes. He wrapped his arms around her and rested his cheek on the top of her head, feeling his world return to normal.
When her sobbing had moved to hitched breathing, she lifted her face. “I’m sorry I didn’t talk to you first.”
Fuck, she was going to unman him with her sweetness. “It’s past.” He used his fingers to wipe away her tears. “I fucked up too. Said shit.” Guilt lodged in his chest. “You want to hit me, I’ll take it. I deserve it.”
“Like I could even dent those muscles of yours?” She rubbed her cheek against his hand and was silent a moment. “I just won’t make you cookies for a week.”
Hell, he’d looked forward to her cooking. “You got a mean side in you, babe.” He kissed her damp face. “We’ll both do better next time.” Next time. Had a good sound. A future.
“Next time.” She bit her lip. “I didn’t ask you before…because you looked unhappy. But—”
“Go on.”
“The mercenary stuff. How—isn’t the work awfully dangerous?”
She was worried about him. Damn. Damn, he liked that. “It’s risky.” He tipped her face up and kissed her slowly. “And last week was my final mission as a merc. I told them I was quitting on Thanksgiving.” Iceman was now retired. Damn straight.
“But…” Her eyes softened. “You took the job because it was a child.” She read the answer in his face. “You have a big ol’ mushy heart, Sir.”
“You want another spanking?”
She giggled and twisted in his arms. “Nope. I have something else I think you should do.” Gripping the hem of his shirt, she yanked it off.
“Bossy, aren’t you?” Lifting her with her round, red ass in his hands, he carried her to the pile of cushions filling one quarter of the room. By the time he got there, his cock was straining against his leathers.
He went to his knee, shoved her back onto the pillows, and stopped for a moment to enjoy the sight. A hanging wrought iron light illuminated her golden body surrounded by the rich blues and dark red cushions. Her streaky brown hair waved over her breasts, leaving the pink-brown peaks jutting up. Her legs were open, her cunt wet with her arousal.
And the scent was…captivating.
Kneeling between her thighs, he ran his hands over her curvy shape, teased her nipples to even tighter points, and smiled as her hips wiggled. Fuck he loved making her squirm. Making her eyes glaze over. And this time, he was going to let her move as much as she wanted.
“C-can I touch you?” she whispered, trying so hard to be a good submissive it warmed his heart.
“Sure, baby, touch me.”
Eyes lighting, she pulled him down onto her and kissed him. Her soft hands stroked his face, his shoulders, his back.
Yeah, here was home. He reveled in the welcome, simply enjoying the anticipation…until it became too much.
Back on his knees, he inhaled, smelling the musky fragrance of a woman in need. He bent, licked around her clit, entertained by her sharp gasp. The pink nub was swollen, exposed, easy to tease…and from the way her breathing changed, she’d get off like a rocket if he continued.
He hesitated, wanting to feel her come from his mouth. And yet…for this first time in what seemed like forever—what could easily have been forever—he needed to be inside her. He wrapped her legs around his waist and undid his leathers, letting his dick out to play.
When he fit himself to her entrance, she clenched his shoulders, trying to tug him closer. Oh yeah, that too—he had a need to see the yielding look in her eyes when he exerted his control. “Hands over your head.”
THE DEEP GROWL seemed to stroke over every nerve in her body. Lindsey looked up into Zander’s face, saw the determination in his jaw, the authority in his gaze, and everything inside her did a shimmy. She put her arms over her head, crossing her wrists as she’d been taught.
He restrained her wrists with one big hand, pressing down enough her back arched. Looking into her eyes, he whispered, “I’m gonna take you so hard you’ll feel me for a week…and now you can’t do a thing to stop me.”
The shiver running down her spine turned to a molten heat at the base.
He pressed his cock against her, slid inside a fraction of an inch, and took her in one long, forceful thrust, not stopping until he was sheathed completely.
Oh God. From empty to shockingly, uncomfortably full. Her head tilted back as she gasped for air. Her pussy spasmed around the intrusion in protest that transformed into need.
“Fuck, I like that look on your face,” he muttered. His eyes were ruthless, dangerous. “Give me more.” He drew out steadily and plunged home again. And again. His gaze never wavered from hers as he increased the pace. The force.
The hammering set up an overwhelming sensation sweeping her away. With his heavy weight on her, his unyielding hold on her wrists, every merciless stroke took her higher, pushed her toward
the inevitable.
And then she crested—plunging headlong as brilliant spasms shook her, surging outward until her whole body trembled with the climax. The darkness behind her closed eyelids sheeted to white. Her hips bucked uncontrollably, seeking more, more, more.
As the waves receded, she managed to open her eyes.
His gaze was still on her face. His smile tight. Not satisfied. “Nice. Now give me another one.”
Unable to move, she stared at him. “What? I can’t.”
“Babe, you know that’s not true,” he chided and released her hands. After tucking his elbow behind her knee, he planted that hand beside her shoulder, forcing her bent leg up in the air. Tilting her hips upward so his cock went even deeper. He kissed her lightly, nipped her chin. “I like being this far inside you,” he whispered. “Now, let’s see how you feel around me when you come this way.”
“Zander…I—”
His other hand settled over her mound. After slicking a finger in the wetness, he slid it over her clit.
At the exquisite surge of pleasure, her insides clamped down around him, making him laugh. “Oh yeah.” His gaze focused on her face, like an inescapable light showcasing her very soul. “Hands on my shoulders—and keep them there.”
As she obeyed the verbal restraint, she felt even more helpless than before. His arm held her leg up, his weight held her pinned to the bed, and his shaft was filling her so, so full. Instead of pounding her, he gradually withdrew only to bury himself in stages, rotating his hips to hit new places.
His finger slid over the tiny ball of nerves, around, on top, relentlessly rubbing one side, before bringing the other side up. Between his cock and his touch, every nerve swelled until she couldn’t tell if sensations were coming from her clit or from within. Her legs quivered as her thighs tensed, her stomach tensed, her arms…
Sweat dampened her temples. “I’m going to come,” she whispered, straining upward toward his teasing.
“Yeah, baby, you are.”
“You come too.”
His gaze was tender. “Right after, pet.” He kissed her lips lightly, and his finger slid from one side of her clit to the other, sending her up, up, up.
As she hovered on the pinnacle for the most perfect moment, she heard him murmur, “I like to watch you get off.”
And ever so slowly he pulled back, until only the tip of his erection pulsed at her entrance. Staring into her eyes, he slammed in, hard and deep.
Oh, oh, oh. Everything inside her clenched around the intrusion, stopping the entire world before spasming over and over. The overwhelming pleasure seized her, engulfed her until her nipples tingled and her skin shimmered with sensation.
“Sweet,” he murmured, and as he’d promised, his cock pistoned into her hard enough to hit the edge of pain, the edge of helplessness, before he set his forehead against hers. The cords stood out on his neck, his jaw was tight, as he let himself go, filling her with his heat.
Chapter Fifteen
In the gathering twilight, deVries surveyed the outside of Lindsey’s duplex. Golden Christmas “icicle” lights hung from the roofline; red ones bordered the windows and door. The trees were outlined in blue. Multicolored lights ran up each side of the walkway. “Not bad.”
Next to him, Xavier brushed dirt off his hands. “Agreed. The ladies should be pleased.”
“You’re not doing your place?” deVries asked as he picked up the tools.
“Abby requested some decorations outside; however, since you can’t see the house from the street, we didn’t do much. Thanks for using Abby’s trimmings from last year—you made her very happy.” Xavier glanced at the trees. “I did happen to notice there are more lights than she mentioned.”
DeVries ignored the comment, because, yeah, he’d bought a few extra strands. He had a fondness for blue. And the trees looked fucking good. The whole place did. He’d never put up Christmas lights before—never had a house to decorate. It was surprisingly satisfying. “Let’s get this stuff put away. Want a beer?”
“I do.”
* * * *
In her kitchen, Lindsey poured a measure of vanilla into the fudge, inhaling the fragrance of chocolate. The sound of the candy bubbling blended with the strains of “O Holy Night” drifting in from the living room. “Now we have to stir—and stir—and stir.”
“No problem.” Finished chopping up walnuts, Abby took a sip of wine and gestured toward the hearth, where Blackie slept next to a Santa doll. “I love the decorations.”
“I’ve been having fun.” Scavenging and crafting required ingenuity. Keeping Zander from buying her anything she wanted took even more. She’d relented and let him buy a Christmas tree, drawing the line at decorations. Paper ornaments would look just fine. “Somehow I wasn’t in the mood last week. Now…”
Humor lit Abby’s face. “Amazing how a relationship can affect a person’s spirits. You’re looking pretty settled in, though. Are you feeling like San Francisco is becoming home?”
“Home? No, Texas is where I belong and always will be.” She regretted her lapse when Abby frowned.
“Your ex is keeping you out of the entire state?”
“For now.” Until certain people are behind bars. I hope. “You know, when I was little, I used to dream about living on a big ranch filled with cattle and horses and children. And a gorgeous husband, of course.”
“Of course,” Abby said in a dry voice. She took the bowl from Lindsey. “My turn to stir. It sounds as if your dream changed…”
“A bit.” Lindsey poured more wine in Abby’s glass and her own. The buzz of the sweet ice wine hummed in her veins. “I found I don’t like cattle so much, let alone the fencing, culling, feeding, vaccinating and deworming and delousing, pasturing, and breeding.” She frowned. “Same with the horses. I enjoy riding, but I don’t want to do the work.”
“That makes sense.” Abby’s face pinkened as she worked at stirring. “How about living in the country?”
“I did love that.” Lindsey popped a walnut in her mouth. “Still, I love the city too. And how tolerant everyone here is.”
“Mmm, I bet that’s different, all right.” Abby smiled. “I’m glad—I’d miss you if you left San Francisco.”
“Me too.” She really would; however, it didn’t matter. “But Texas is home.”
DEVRIES STOPPED OUTSIDE the kitchen feeling as if he’d spotted an IED in front of his speeding Hummer. How had he not realized she still considered Texas to be home?
Maybe because he didn’t think of anyplace as “home”—something he needed to return to.
She had family in Texas.
She hadn’t talked about her people. Or her plans. Neither had he, but damned if he hadn’t just realized he’d been making some.
Unsettled, he walked into the kitchen, followed by Xavier and the black pup. “Lights are up.” He grabbed a couple of beers from the fridge and handed one to Xavier.
“All right!” Lindsey pumped her fist in the air in victory. “I need to see. But we have to finish the fudge first. Want to take a turn stirring?”
“Sure.” He swallowed some beer before accepting the bowl from Abby. “I only have to stir, right?”
“Right.” Lindsey gave the candy a glance. “It’ll be a while. The shine has to go away.”
“The shine? It’s a liquid, babe. It will stay shiny.”
“It’s fudge, and it will change. Trust me, Oh-Enforcer-Man.”
Knowing her ass was probably still tender, he swatted her and got a cute squeak. “Watch it, Tex.” He drank in her giggle. He fucking loved her laugh.
“That reminds me, Enforcer-man.” Xavier removed his jacket and set it on a chair. “Do you want me to stop drafting you to discipline submissives?”
DeVries stopped stirring for a second. “I’m not sure. We’ve never discussed it.” We. Had a nice sound to it. He’d always figured being part of a couple would strangle him. Instead, the time with Lindsey was comfortable. Calming. Fun. He glanced o
ver at her. “You got a choice in this too, babe.”
She bit her lip. “Well…” Face flushed from the heat in the room, long hair tied up in a ponytail, wearing a flannel shirt over a tank top, jeans, and bright-red-and-green fluffy socks. Seriously cute.
“Spill it.”
“I feel small-minded, but it would bother me seeing you touch other women.”
Good. At least that was mutual, since anyone touching her would end up with busted fingers. “I’m okay with that. And men?”
Her lips curved. “I’d probably enjoy watching you beat on guys.”
“All right,” Xavier said. “Zander, I’ll save you for male discipline and give Ethan or Mitchell the females. Ethan might be a bit too soft-hearted, though.”
“Worthington is a nice guy,” deVries said, able to acknowledge it now.
“I had a chat with HurtMe,” Xavier continued. “And I referred him to one of the kink-friendly counselors in town. Apparently he wants a Master so badly he’s misinterpreting what happens during a scene.”
Abby nodded. “I think, now he sees it, he’ll be able to get straightened out.”
“That’s good.” Lindsey gave deVries an unhappy look. “In his case, I’d rather you—”
“I won’t.” Unable to resist, he handed Xavier the bowl and pulled her close. Her small body fit against his, and after a second of surprise, she snuggled into him.
Living in the moment was all very good. Nonetheless they were going to have a long chat about her future plans and Texas.
* * * *
Midweek, Lindsey stared in horror at the video playing out on her laptop. A younger Victor walked across the screen toward a barely pubescent Hispanic boy, like the one who had escaped from the ranch building. The child was blindfolded and tied facedown over a stack of crates. Crying, then screaming in pain as—
Lindsey’s skin went clammy, too hot, too cold. As roaring filled her head, she swallowed convulsively, trying to watch, to finish, to—
Her stomach revolted, and she ran into the bathroom. And vomited again and again, endlessly, draining her strength, her sight, everything.
Edge of the Enforcer Page 19
