Time froze. As in I couldn’t move. And inches away from my face, the housecat-sized sphynx’s humanoid eyes seemed to swirl a goldish, bronze above its bizarre flat muttonchops-helmet-thing.
“You must solve my riddle …” it said in a nasally whine stereotypical of an evil Chinese henchman. Except the sphynx didn’t actually speak the words—they just sort of flowed into my mind, kind of like the psychic link to my familiars.
I tried to move. Couldn’t.
“Let me go!” I tried to say but not even a Mmphh came out.
Fluffy: Tsk, tsk. Speak with your mind, girl.
Garfunkel: Yeah, Theo.
“Wait, you can hear it too?” I … projected.
Garfunkel: Duh.
Simon: Theo, that is not a nice kitty cat.
Me: I know. Now what do I do?
Garfunkel: Are you daft? Answer its riddle.
Me: And if I get it wrong?
Fluffy: The riddle is:
Am I ball and chain
or a warm embrace?
You don't get to choose me,
in your heart I remain.
Me: Umm—
Fluffy: You have twenty seconds and they start … meow.
The riddle sounded familiar, but I couldn’t quite remember why. So I used up a lifeline and polled the audience.
Me: Guys?
Simon: Love!
Garfunkel: A spiked flail? A morning star? No wait, marriage?
Simon: No, Hope! It’s Hope. I know it is.
Fluffy: Ten seconds …
Me: Guys, you’re not helping.
Garfunkel: Maybe it’s Greed …
Simon: It’s Hope! That is a very common answer to riddles.
Garfunkel: Hope? No way. Theo, it’s Greed. Actually, come to think of it, maybe it’s Lust.
Fluffy: Time is up. Your answer?
I took a deep breath.
Me: Family.
Fluffy: Lucky guess.
Simon: Aww. That’s a good one!
Garfunkel: Wait. I’m confused—how’d you know that, Theo? You’re not exactly known for your intellect.
Me: Gee thanks. My father likes riddles. I’ve probably heard them all.
The sphynx hopped off the railing and trudged away defeated. I took a deep breath and shook my head. I could move again! The ordeal had taken place so fast. I wondered idly what would have happened had I gotten the riddle wrong.
It didn’t matter. I glanced around at Typhon’s gang and located Gan standing farther down along the railing, sipping from a steaming mug. I walked over to him, gripping my jacket tight around my shoulders to ward off the chilly wind.
“Whatcha looking at?” I asked.
Gan sighed. “The cars. We didn’t have cars in ancient Greece.”
“You didn’t have a lot of things,” I said.
He raised a hand passively, a gesture maybe an emo kid or Edgar Allen Poe might use. The woes of the world and all that. This was a new look for the world’s most handsome guy.
“You don’t like it here?” I asked. “In the GoneGod World.”
He sighed again. Wiped a strand of curly hair from his perfect eyes. “It’s … different.”
I looked him in the eyes. It was nearly impossible to turn away and I had the urge to touch his arm as I whispered, “Don said Zeus kidnapped you and made you his lover and all that. I guess that could mess you up …”
Gan sighed. “It was … traumatic at first. But I found a family in my fellow Zeus servants.”
“So you’re on the Brotherhood of Zeus’s side, right?”
After a passing glance at the nearest Oni guard Gan said, “I think Typhon suspects I’m a plant. His guards have been watching me so closely, I missed my last check-in with the Brotherhood. And when I found out about the chimera attack, I couldn’t warn them …” He turned his head away from me but not before I caught a glimpse of a tear rolling down one eye.
For all I knew, it could’ve been an act. But I recognized the hurt in Gan’s eyes; I saw it every time I looked in the mirror. Prolonged grief and helplessness—not shock from the mansion slaughter. “You’ve lost someone else,” I said. “Your family before Zeus kidnapped you?”
Gan nodded and the sound of heavy clopping footfalls brought both our heads to the side.
“Hey, GAN. Did you hear the joke about the ONE-ARMED CLOWN who tried to ROB A BANK—OH SORRY. Did not realize you two were having a MOMENT.”
The Minotaur belched and walked off the other way.
“I’m sorry about your family,” I said. “I’d say you’d get to see them again someday but since there are no more heavens and hells, er not that they would have gone to hell, but—”
Gan chuckled and patted my hand. “I do plan on seeing them again, my family.”
I glanced off to the side at the nearest guard to make sure we weren’t being overheard. “Huh?”
Gan leaned in closer to me, his words brisk. “In this GoneGod World, anything is possible. Death need not be final.”
“Did you not just hear what I said—”
“ ‘The hundred-headed beast shall be struck down, and the dead shall rejoice.’ ” The way Gan said it was like some sort of recital, like some sort of …
“That part of the prophesy?” I asked.
Gan seemed genuinely surprised. “You know of it?”
I nodded. “Not that part—Don filled me in. Explains why Typhon wanted his axe back so badly. But what’s this about the dead rejoicing?”
Gan shrugged. “You’ve got to understand that back in the day when the oracles prophesied, it involved a lot of incense and dancing and flowery language.” He glanced back over the skyscraper’s edge. “Typhon killed many people back in his day. So it reasons that his death would cause figurative rejoicing on their part. All I really know is that it’s step one of the Re-Life ritual.”
I bit my lip. “Re-Life ritual? That … Typhon is planning to perform?”
Gan pursed his lips. “Um, forget I said anything about that.”
Garfunkel yawned. “Yeah, forget about it. Hah! He’s up to something.”
Simon pulled at his shirt collar. “I’m more concerned about the prophesy. I wouldn’t be surprised if it meant actual dead people rejoicing … we should leave now.”
I looked Gan dead in the eyes. “I don’t care about some stupid prophesy. All I want is to get Orion and get out. The Brotherhood of Zeus was going to be my ticket but for all I know, they’re all dead now. So that leaves you. Can you help me?”
Gan glanced at an Oni guard approaching us as he made his rounds. “I can see you care very much for Orion. My advice: tell him the next time you see him.”
I growled. “I would if I knew where to find him. Are you going to help me or not?”
Gan’s words came barely above a whisper. “He’s down by the Arena. Look, certain events have been set in motion. Even the Brotherhood’s demise cannot stop them. I cannot help you directly but if you play your part, you’ll get to see him again. Don’t do anything rash. This is bigger than you.”
Before I could ask him more, the Oni guard was upon us and Gan slipped out of my grasp, leaving me with more questions than answers.
Was he really still loyal to the Zeus gang? How was I supposed to play my part? And what the hell was this Re-Life ritual?
Ugh. Men. And here I thought sphynxes were confusing …
“You gonna go find Orion now?” Garfunkel said, disregarding Gan’s message. “That is your plan still, right?”
I sighed. “I need to contact Arachne.”
“But how?” Simon asked. “You don’t exactly have a phone.”
“Not yet,” I admitted as I surveyed the rooftop for the most unsuspecting mark. A few feet away from me, a serving boy in a tux pulled a phone from his pocket, making no attempt to hide the four-digit code he typed to unlock the screen.
Bingo! Target Acquired.
I’d have to be careful though with the Oni demon guards tracking my every mo
vement.
“Theo, stealing is wrong!” Simon said, throwing up his tiny hands and turning to Garfunkel. “She never listens to me!”
Garfunkel shrugged. “Women.”
I waited until the serving boy tucked his phone into his pocket and received a tray of drinks from the rooftop bar. As he walked my way, I positioned myself so that I brushed shoulders with him, but instead of grabbing a glass of mulled wine from his tray, I slipped a hand into his pocket and came out with his phone. With a curt apology, I tucked it under my jacket and continued toward the door leading back down into the building.
“Guys,” I whispered to my shoulders. “Get along. We’re on the most important job of our lives.”
“The Good Wife”
The sloshed Minotaur was just about to rap-battle the sphynx when I reached the rooftop door, and the Oni demon in formal attire guarding it. (In the Minotaur’s defense, he’d had about three liters of whisky, by my last count. No wonder these guys were loyal to their boss Typhon. He let them throw drunk parties at night above the NYC skyline.)
“Well, don’t you look handsome,” I said, patting the breast pocket of the gruff Other.
He grunted in amusement, eyeing me.
“I’m ready to go to my room now.”
He grunted again and accompanied me into the stairwell beyond the door and into Typhon’s penthouse suite. We passed through the kitchen on our way to the bedrooms.
“Oh, Theo, dear.” It was Typhon’s wife, leaning over a cutting board on the countertop beside the sink. She had cored a pineapple and was now slicing it into rings with a chef’s knife. Turning to my Oni demon chaperone, she said, “I’ll take her from here.”
My guard nodded and headed back to the roof.
Echidna turned back to me. “Your cheeks are so red. I do hope you didn’t catch a cold.”
I shrugged. “Still prepping food? Typhon must be pretty demanding.”
Echidna smiled weakly. Motherly … I thought of my mother, and Larry saying, “It’s your mother …” My stomach twisted up. Best not to get worked up about that now, I thought, pulling my focus back to Typhon’s wife.
“Of course not,” Echidna said. “Typhon is quite sweet, actually—just don’t tell his lieutenants. Our little secret?” She held a finger to her lips, sweet pineapple juice dripping from her slender digit. “Get that bowl for me please?” she asked, indicating a wide glass Pyrex bowl sitting on the counter just out of reach.
I moved it closer to Echidna and she looped the knife through the center of the cored fruit and deposited the pristine pineapple rings into the glass container. She turned to me.
“Thank you, Theo. I didn’t want to spill any more juice on the counter. GoneGods know I can be a klutz at times in the kitchen. It’s the smallest things in life that bring the biggest smiles to people’s faces.” She glanced down at the pineapple and I admired her nails, clipped into claws and painted a glossy black so shiny you could almost see your reflection in them. “This is one of my husband’s favorite foods. We like to do little things for each other.”
You two are so sickeningly sweet, I wanted to say. But instead I said, “I like your nails.”
“Thanks.” She wiped her palms on her apron. “Theo, I really am sorry for how I acted down in the Arena Pit a few days back. You must think I’m some heartless bitch …”
What I was thinking was that she was the world’s greatest actress. Or she had a split personality like Jekyll and Hyde.
Echidna continued. “What is it the kids are saying these days …? I hadn’t had my Snickers chocolate bar that night. I hope you can forgive me?” She sucked off the pineapple juice from her finger while batting her eyes hopefully at me. The actions didn’t come across as forced or seductive. Maybe I had judged these people wrong. So what if they enjoyed pitting beasts to the death in some underground arena? Had all that really happened? Or was it just some bad dream … No. It was real. She took Orion. This woman … she was playing me.
It didn’t seem that way though. The woman standing before me seemed completely genuine.
“Oh, my dear, are you alright?” she asked, coming close and placing a hand on my arm, reminding me of how my mother would tuck me in against her side like a duckling when I was a child. Echidna’s fingers were surprisingly cold to the touch; I shivered at both the coldness and the memory of my mom.
“I’m fine.” I felt absently at my wrist. “Are you? You’re so cold.”
She swallowed embarrassedly. “The doctors haven’t been able to diagnose it. You know how it is. ‘Other’ medicine isn’t nearly as advanced as human medicine. Our internal organs are different. We even have different-colored blood. And don’t get me started on the changes in our DNA. But whatever I’ve got, at least it’s not as bad as …” Her eyes flashed to a portrait hanging on the wall of her and Typhon with their pet Cerberus and Sphynx at the bottom corners. It was a nice picture, reminiscent of an Adams Family portrait.
“Typhon?” I asked.
She swallowed hard. Again. And let herself fall back into a kitchen chair. She dabbed at her eye with an Oscar-nominee quality that I didn’t think could be faked. Of course, that’s what made it Oscar-nominee quality in the first place.
“Is he …” I hesitated. “What’s wrong with him?”
“Oh …” She dabbed at her eye again. “It’s not my place to say. Just know, he’s not the monster people say he is. He’s a businessman. A good man. He donates a lot to human hospitals. And to schools. I think his demonstration tomorrow morning will show you how much of a humanitarian he is. He really does want to help humankind and Otherkind.” Echidna glanced at her wrist. “Oh, look at the time. You are probably wanting some sleep.”
I took a last glance at the family portrait. “Yes, I’m interested to see what it’s all about,” I remarked evenly.
She smiled. “It’s not my place to say. I guess he wanted to keep it a surprise. Anyways, let me show you to your room.”
The guest bedroom was more than five times the size of my paltry apartment. It was bigger than some single-story houses in NYC. The attached bathroom complete with a walk-in shower was as big as my entire apartment bedroom! The only thing that could have made it better was a window but you couldn’t have everything (well, Typhon could, I guess.)
“Sleep well,” Echidna said.
I turned, but she was already gone. Thank the GoneGods. She was so caring, I thought she’d offer to tuck me in for the night.
“This is really nice,” Garfunkel said.
“Yeah,” I said, my mind on Orion entering the Arena tomorrow night … I was running out of time. I’d planned to jailbreak him tonight when everyone was asleep but Gan had been pretty insistent that I didn’t do anything reckless. And “play my part?” Was he referencing my role as prophesy girl?
Grr …
“Can’t Spell Demonstration Without ‘Demon’ ”
After two in the morning, I pulled out the cell phone I’d lifted from one of the serving staff.
Before I dialed up Arachne’s new phone number which I’d memorized in the Cracker Barrel restroom, I crept out of my bedroom and past the closed door of what I assumed was the master bedroom, judging by the animalistic groans and thuds coming from within. Gross.
I made it all the way to the kitchen when Fido the Cerberus sniffed me. I raised the phone and hurriedly snapped a photo of the Typhon family portrait, slipping back to my guest room as paws padded hungrily after me.
“Theo!” Arachne answered when I called her back in my room.
I filled her in on all that had happened and that I wouldn’t be requiring her and LK’s help in escaping tonight, which elicited a sad sigh from LK.
“There is one more thing I’d like you to check on,” I said. “Can you locate a djinn curator named Mel? She works for some association for orphaned artifacts. I need you to pass on to her all the photos of Typhon’s lieutenants and crew you took at Club Athena. I’m also sending you a picture with Typhon’
s wife. Something’s off about her. Maybe one of the photos can help Mel determine that a scroll she took from me actually belongs to me. Then again, if Typhon wants it, maybe it’s better if she holds onto it … If I can just prove that one of them is in league against Typhon, it could be the bargaining chip I need to exchange for Orion’s life.”
“Yes, yes,” Arachne said in a sing-songy voice, her fingers tapping a string of commands on her keyboard. “Theo, you can count on me and LK.”
“At thy service,” LK intoned from the background. Friggin LK.
I sighed. “Great. I’ll call you tomorrow with a finalized plan for rescuing Orion and to get your intel.”
“Be careful! XOXO,” Arachne signed off.
“XOXO.” I powered down the phone so it couldn’t be traced and concealed it under the bed for use tomorrow after the demonstration.
With that done, I fell back on my bed and yawned. Before I could even whisper goodnight to my familiars, sleep took me.
I awoke in a sweat to someone gently knocking on the bedroom door.
“Breakfast is ready,” Echidna called. “And the demonstration starts in half an hour.”
I hopped in the shower, vaguely recalling the dream I’d just awoken from. In it, my mother and Orion had stood across from me, both waving as they receded into the distance.
Dreams. Just the firing of random nerve impulses, right?
I changed into a new pair of jeans, a shirt and socks that had been folded up and resting on the bathroom sink.
Echidna’s breakfast put Cracker Barrel’s to shame. Typhon had already gone “downstairs” to prepare for the demonstration so it was just the two of us.
Before we left, Echidna tossed some vegetables in a NutriBullet juicer and poured a greenish concoction into a plastic bottle. She snapped on the lid and smiled at me as she ushered me toward the elevator. “How do the clothes fit?”
I shrugged. They fit well.
Axes and Angels: A Snarky Urban Fantasy Novel (Better Demons Series Book 1) Page 37
