by Dylann Crush
Robbie and Caroline didn’t get back until dusk. He carried her from the car to the living room and set her down in the corner of the giant sectional sofa. I watched from my post at the kitchen island. I’d been baking all afternoon, right up until I ran out of flour. The guys had made a hefty dent in the stash already, but still dozens of cookies sat on plates and platters on the kitchen table. I’d offered to make dinner but nobody wanted the ginger slaw and teriyaki turkey avocado burgers I’d suggested.
Caroline gave me a smug look from her perch on the sofa. “Cassie? Be a dear and get me a glass of nice cold water, will you?”
Misty hopped off the stool next to me and patted my shoulder on the way to the fridge. “I got it,” she said under her breath.
I raised my margarita toward her. She may have sworn off of them for the day, but as far as I was concerned, they were fair game. I’d managed to put away one or two while I manned my station at the island.
“So? What’s the damage?” Misty handed Caroline the glass of water she’d requested then leaned against the back of the sofa.
“Just a sprain, thank goodness. The doctor told me to stay off it for the next few days and keep it iced. Thank God Robbie was there. He stayed by my side the entire time.”
Robbie ran a hand over his brow and his eyes met mine from across the room. “The ER isn’t where you want to be on the Fourth of July.”
“Saved you some burgers. Do you want ‘em now, or can we get out on the boat to watch the fireworks?” Misty asked.
Caroline grabbed Robbie’s wrist. “Oh, Robbie was such a doll and ran out for dinner while we waited at the hospital. And I don’t think I should venture out on the boat again. We’ll just stay here and watch the fireworks from the deck while y’all go out.”
“Ryan and I can get you down to the boat.” Robbie twisted his arm away from her grasp.
“You’ll stay here with me, won’t you Robbie?” She gazed up at him and fluttered her implanted lashes.
I wanted to pull those unnaturally dark, long eyelashes out one by one with a pair of tweezers. Geez, the margaritas were getting to me.
“Alright, whoever’s going, let’s go.” Jake clapped his hands together and everyone moved toward the door.
Everyone but Caroline and Robbie. I glanced at his face. His eyes pleaded with mine. What the hell did he want from me? Why was I so pissed off? I never should have come in the first place.
Torn between going out on the boat and faking excitement over fireworks, or staying at the house and watching Caroline continue to assert her ownership of Robbie, I opted for the boat.
Jake and Ryan hauled the coolers while the rest of us tottered behind them down to the dock. My hand wrapped around a half-full pitcher of frozen margaritas. If I could survive the next fifteen hours, I’d be on my way back to the farm. Robbie would be coming too, of course. But if I could just get back to the house and focus on the renovations, we’d have something tangible between us again. Being out here made it hard to ignore the effect he had on me. I’d been fighting it, but it was so strong. The memories pulled me—back to a time and place when Robbie had been the most important thing in the world to me. The more time I spent around him the more I realized he hadn’t changed that much.
“You okay, Cassie?” Misty plopped down on the seat next to me as Ryan and Scooter pushed the boat away from the dock.
“Yeah. Maybe it was a mistake to come.”
“Don’t let Caroline get to you. She’s been after Robbie on and off for years. Who knows how long it will take for her to finally give up and move on.”
“I almost hate to ask, but what exactly is going on between them? Have they been together very long?” I sipped the cold, alcoholic concoction through my straw. Did I even want to know?
“Robbie came to the lake with us for a long weekend that summer of our freshman year. Caroline was here with Heather and the two of them hooked up. I don’t know the details, but they were pretty hot and heavy half the summer. Then Robbie ended it.” Misty shrugged her shoulders. “She still came around, but he wasn’t interested.”
“So they only dated for a few months?”
“Then. But she moved back to town about a year ago and started in on him again. I don’t think she’s the kind of gal that likes to lose.”
“Yeah, I kind of picked up on that already.” I drained my glass and reached over for the pitcher for a refill.
Jake anchored the boat just as the first fireworks burst overhead. Being out in the middle of the lake, with no tree line to contend with, the view took my breath away. Explosions of pink, blue, gold, and purple, filled the sky. “The Star Spangled Banner” blared from speakers someone across the lake must have set up on their dock. I relaxed into the cushion, and let the gentle rocking of the boat ease the tension away.
When the smoke from the grand finale dissipated, Jake switched on the motor and we made our way back across the lake. Without the glare of the big city lights, the night sky reflected millions of small dots of light. I located the Big Dipper and followed the handle down to the cup, just like my mom had taught me. Most of my memories of her had faded, but we’d stared at the stars so many times, I could still hear her instructions as if she was whispering them right into my ear. “Just keep drawing that line through the Little Dipper, honey, and there you are.” The five stars making up the “W” of Cassiopeia sparkled. My fingertip ran over the matching pale birthmark on my forearm.
What would my mother think about me finally having my own place? My dad seemed thrilled. With the restaurant coming together, maybe he’d finally forgive me for dropping out of college before finishing my degree. He couldn’t understand how I’d chosen culinary school over a business degree. I had a feeling my mom would have understood, though. In the few blurry memories I had left, she spoke to me in the voice of a romantic, a star-gazer, someone who would have encouraged me to follow my dreams.
Would she feel the same about me selling the farmhouse? A stone dropped from my chest, thudding into my stomach and I wrapped my arms around my waist, folding over to quiet the ripples of guilt, shame, and fear.
The boat puttered across the lake and back to the dock. Back to Robbie and Caroline. Had she won him over playing the poor-pitiful-me card? I didn’t care. My head fuzzed with the amount of alcohol I’d consumed. Robbie and Caroline belonged together. If that was the kind of woman who appealed to him, there was no chance of anything being rekindled between us.
As Scooter hopped off the boat and tied up, I staggered to my feet. Damn margaritas. A tequila burp escaped my lips, and Misty turned to face me, a giant smile on her face. “Are you wasted?”
I waved my hands in front of my face. “Nah. I think that last one just went to my head.” My hand closed around the railing of the boat. I lifted a foot to climb over and step down to the dock.
“Let me help you off there.” Ryan held onto my hand, and I stumbled over the edge of the boat and into his arms.
He pulled me up against him, scooped my feet out from under me, then carried me up to the grass.
“What the hell’s going on?” Robbie met us on the lawn.
“Just helping Cass off the boat.” Ryan set me down next to Robbie.
“Hey Robbie, how’s the patient?” I attempted to stand up but my foot slipped in my flip flop and twisted, propelling me into Robbie’s side.
“Passed out from pain pills.” His arms curled around me, setting me upright. “You okay, Cass?”
“Mmm.” I placed my palms on his chest. My fingers pressed against the firm muscles under his shirt. Life wasn’t fair. He hadn’t had pecs made out of granite when I’d had all the time in the world to run my hands over him. I licked my lips.
“Jesus, Cass. Are you drunk?” Robbie stepped back, and I stumbled toward him.
Ryan grabbed my arm before I toppled over. “Come here, Cassie. I’ll make sure you get to bed okay.”
“The hell you will.” Robbie stepped between me and Ryan, taking my a
rm and flinging it over his shoulder. “Let’s get you up to the house.” With one arm around my waist, he half carried, half dragged me, my feet barely touching the ground.
“I’m fine. I don’t need your help.” The words slid out of my mouth, tumbling together.
“Oh yeah? You can barely stand up straight.” He pushed the glass door open and we staggered down the hall.
“I’m not wasted. Just had to get my mind off things.”
“What kind of things?” We’d reached the bedroom. Robbie flicked on the light and made a move toward the bed while trying to untangle me from his arms.
“You and me and bathtubs and churches.” I was tired of fighting it. Tired of constantly beating down the attraction. We fell on the bed, his weight pressing me into the mattress. I spoke into the softness of his T-shirt clad abs. “It’s so hard, Robbie.”
He rolled off to the side. “What is, sweetheart?”
I snuggled in beside him. Damn if we didn’t fit like two halves finally coming together again to form a whole. “Why couldn’t you stay in my past?”
A gazillion butterflies beat soft gossamer wings against my ear as Robbie whispered, “I don’t want to stay in the past. I’m your future.”
“It won’t work. My future’s in Dallas. And yours…yours is with Glamzilla.”
He pulled back, gazing into my eyes. “I broke up with Caroline over a week ago. I was just trying to be a nice guy and not embarrass her in front of everyone.”
His weight pressed into me, anchoring me. “Broke up with Caroline? What do you mean?”
“I can’t lead her on when my heart belongs to someone else.” He ran his hand down my cheek. “It’s not over for me. Whatever we had between us. I don’t want to let it go. I know you’re involved with Parker, but he doesn’t deserve you. He doesn’t know you like I do.”
So what if I’d killed any idea of a romantic future with Parker? We still had a plan. And helping me finally realize my dream of becoming a restaurant owner was something he could give me. “You don’t know me at all. I broke it off with Parker, but I still need to go back. He and I have the same goal.”
“Wait. You and Parker aren’t together?” Robbie studied me, his green gaze pulling at me.
“No, but it doesn’t matter. We’re still doing the restaurant together. Our needs align.”
Robbie snuggled closer, tossing a leg over mine. His hand rested on the sliver of skin between my shirt and shorts. “I think our needs are aligning pretty well tonight.”
Although I wanted to fight it, my body responded to his, just like it always had. “I’m not talking about the need you’ve got aligned with my thigh. I’m talking about plans for the future. Parker and I share a dream. He’s got a vision.” But Parker’s touch had never sent chills racing up and down my side. The firm, physical evidence of his desire pressing against my leg had never thrilled me to my core.
“What are you afraid of, Cassafrass? You were too chicken to kiss me back when I dared you.”
“I’m not too chicken. There’s nothing between us, Robbie. There can’t be. We’re not the same people we used to be.” As much as I wanted it to be true, he could tell I didn’t mean it. He’d always been able to read me, to know me better than I knew myself.
“Then you won’t care if I do this,” he murmured, pressing his lips against the firm set of my jaw.
A million tiny prickles danced along my skin, and I grabbed a fistful of the comforter. “Nope, don’t care at all. Are you done?”
His breath tickled my neck. “Just warming up.”
He leaned over me, his gaze meeting mine. I could see the need in his eyes. A flicker of insecurity flashed across his gorgeous stubbled cheeks and then his eyes drifted shut. His face came closer, his lips searching, seeking…I should move. Get out of the way before it was too late.
My limbs didn’t respond. Paralyzed, I braced myself for contact.
Our lips touched. Tentatively, his mouth pressed against mine. My arms took on a life of their own, wrapping around his neck and pulling him into me. What was I doing?
A wave of protest surged in my chest. But then Robbie’s tongue slipped into my mouth, crashing through the flimsy wall of resistance I’d propped up. My fingers tangled in his hair and I rolled toward him. His hands slid under my shirt, leaving a trail of fire in their wake. All that mattered was this moment. The restaurant, renovations on the house…it all faded into the background. The only thing I could focus on was the here and now, like the feel of Robbie’s thigh pressing into the space between my legs.
An ache pulsed, deep within me. With every flick of his tongue, it grew. I needed to feel him next to me, skin-to-skin. My hands pushed at his T-shirt, skating over his washboard abs, past the sculpted muscles of his filled-out chest. He jerked the shirt over his head, and it drifted to the floor. I yanked my arms through the armholes of my T-shirt. It settled around my neck like a bunched up infinity scarf.
A strangled moan tumbled from my mouth on an exhale. I couldn’t get a deep breath into my lungs. My lips wouldn’t separate from his long enough to draw in enough air. Yes, yes, and more yes. Why had I been so against this?
His palms skimmed over my navel. Higher, I silently urged. My body was desperate to feel him everywhere all at once. The deep ache throbbed within my core. I writhed against his leg, desperate to alleviate the painful, frantic need.
He wedged a hand between us to work on the button of my pants. I rolled onto my back giving him better access. He pushed my shorts down with one hand, unable to get them over my hips. I lifted my ass off the bed and slid them down, kicking them onto the floor. Clothing needed to be gone…now. His shorts followed. Briefs to panties, I rolled on top of him. His hands fumbled with my bra, unhooking the clasp. Before I could free my arms from the straps he palmed my breasts. I almost cried out as his rough, callused palms brushed over my sensitive nipples.
“So good, Robbie,” I mumbled into his kiss. My lips slipped from his mouth to his scruffy chin. Robbie the man was so much more, well, so much more man than Robbie the boy had ever been. I couldn’t get enough.
“It’s always been good, Cassafrass.”
He rolled us over, right over the edge of the bed. Thump! He landed on his back, and I fell on top of him. The air whooshed out of his lungs and he let out a laugh.
“You okay?” I asked, tracing the shell of his ear with my tongue.
His hips thrust into mine, squarely hitting the center of my throbbing ache. “Oh God!”
“Hang on.” His hand reached toward his shorts and he pulled something out of the pocket.
My body stilled. It wouldn’t take much. Even through our underwear, one tiny movement could send me hurtling toward the abyss.
“You sure about this?” Robbie’s eyes searched mine. “I don’t want to do anything you’re going to regret.”
I peppered his cheeks with kisses. “I already regret it. Let’s make it official.” Part of me was joking. The other part of me knew this was crossing a line. I couldn’t stay in Missouri. But I couldn’t fight the attraction to Robbie any more either. I’d let myself have this – one night. Otherwise I’d always wonder if what we’d had between us once upon a time was still real. Maybe this would get him out of my system.
“Cass, I don’t want it to be like that. If you’re not sure, we don’t have to do anything.” He attempted to flip me over, but I clenched my thighs against him and slowly slid up and down, caressing the front of his briefs with my pelvis.
He closed his eyes and groaned. “You’ve gotta stop that.”
“Or what?” I put my palms on the floor on either side of his head and let my hips slowly brush over his erection and back down again.
“I’m warning you. Cut that out. I can’t take it.”
I licked my lips. Nice to see he was as turned on and struggling for control as much as me. I leaned back and sat up, squeezing his hips between my thighs. My fingers skimmed his navel and teased under the waistband of hi
s boxer briefs. He didn’t move, just watched me slide them past his hips and down his legs.
Unencumbered by underwear, all-grown up Robbie’s penis thrust into the air. I ran my palm along his length. He bucked into my hand then hissed and flipped me onto my back. Hovering over me, he yanked my panties halfway down my legs.
“No turning back now.” He ripped the packet open with his teeth.
“Let me.” I took the condom from him and rolled it into place. A sense of giddiness fizzed up inside my chest, like bubbles rising to the top of a glass of champagne. It felt like a dream. A dream I’d been having for nine long years. Could this really be happening?
Robbie bit his lip as my hands slid over him. Condom in place, I slapped his ass. “Nine years in the making. Show me your new moves.”
His hips nudged my thighs. Gladly, they parted. Anticipation washed over me. I gripped his arms and adjusted my hips, impatiently waiting, eager to take this next step. His hard-on nudged my inner thigh then moved higher, making contact with the tiny bundle of nerves at my core. My hips thrust up and he slid inside. I couldn’t help myself, I arched my back, putting me in that awkward bridge position I’d never mastered in yoga. He wrapped an arm around my waist, cradling me to him. His hips retreated then drove into me again, and we fell back to the ground.
Something inside me snapped. The feel of him finally, bittersweetly inside me was too much. Overwhelmed by the sensation, my hips struggled to find a rhythm. Robbie rocked back and forth, driving into me with an emotional force I’d never seen or felt before. My arms wrapped around his back, urging him on. We found a rhythm and the throbbing ache I’d been so desperate to relieve slowly morphed into a budding release. Robbie increased the speed, and I struggled to keep the pace. My ass rubbed against the carpet; the sting of a little rug burn was nothing compared to the sensation of having him buried deep inside me.
“Come on, Cassafrass. Don’t let me get there without you.”
I rolled over, taking control, slowing the pace. My knees slid to the side, rubbing on the carpet as my body catapulted toward a release. The build began, slowly at first. Robbie’s hands grasped my hips, firm, cementing us together. I bent toward him, letting our lips touch. My body needed this, needed to be reminded of what it felt like to be wanted by someone. We’d been building toward this all summer. I just hadn’t let myself admit it.
