“Had an interesting conversation with him yesterday.”
That piqued her suspicion. He must have known it would because he got a kind of distant look while inspecting his food. Though he masked his triumph with a smile, she saw it.
“Were you talking about sex?” she asked. “Don’t tell me you—”
“I don’t walk up to guys and say, ‘Hey, would you like to fuck my girlfriend?’ It’s not a good icebreaker, you know? He was helping out with the bar, and we got to talking about the empty building next to Floyd’s. He needs more space for the gym; Noon wants to open a garage.”
“A legitimate garage or a return to his roots?”
Ryske shrugged. “Maybe a bit of both.”
“So, you want to buy a new building? What do you know about running a gym or a garage?”
“Me? I can turn my hand to anything,” he said and winked at her. “But, Maze and me were talking about if we extended the second floor over the alley into our stairwell, we could run a pool hall with access to Floyd’s. So, you know, we all feed into each other.”
“I think that’s a great idea,” she said. “Where will you get the money?”
“Money?” he asked, slurping a noodle. “We’ll figure that out. The gym would be on the first floor with the garage, both would have space in the basement. Then we’d have the whole second floor for the pool hall. It’s a huge building.”
“Will you show me?” she asked. As he was nodding, a thought struck her. “You’re not pissed that I told Lena to keep that money from mine and Rupert’s wedding fund, are you? If we need it for Floyd’s—”
“I’m not pissed, baby,” he said, picking up a curled section of her hair. “Better than a blender… It’s not like we need it for our wedding.”
That was sort of a sad truth. If they couldn’t be together, they couldn’t get married. She’d told her family that they could rely on Ryske and she stood by that. She didn’t think he’d ever be bitter enough to hurt the people she loved.
Harlow didn’t even realize she was looking at her left hand until Ryske slid his hand over hers to let his fingertips graze her ring finger. “In a heartbeat, baby,” he said and she looked up. “You know that, don’t you?”
She nodded. Their whole lives were riding on her decisions. Ryske let her call the shots. He didn’t rush or coerce her… Well, maybe he coerced a little, but she didn’t mind him being led by his passion for her.
They’d had so much turmoil that night that when she turned her hand to let his fingers lace through hers, she was ready to play. “You do know the number one reason we could never get married,” she said. “Before all the other bullshit, there’s one major reason.”
“What’s that?” he asked, telling her through his tone that he was prepared for her to tease.
“You’d have to pick a best man,” she said. “Whoever you didn’t choose could fall out with you.”
“Nah,” he said. “They’ll draw straws. Whoever isn’t best man can be bridesmaid.”
The image of them trying to convince any of the guys it was a good idea to get manicures and massages was funny enough without even beginning to think about dresses and shoes.
But, Harlow couldn’t let them coast in their teasing for long. Letting go of his hand, she slipped hers under the table onto her knee. “Tell me the plan.”
“Tomorrow,” he said and cleared his throat. “Like I said, we keep Ophelia sweet… If I have to, I’ll apologize…” He didn’t seem happy about it. “I’ll make nice with her. We need that game after.”
“What do we want?”
Pushing his plate away, the first thing she thought about was the waste of food. Though, that wasn’t exactly important in relation to what they were discussing. “There’s a reason I wanted to talk to you alone about this,” he said, pushing her plate away too so he could scoop up her hand.
Harlow wasn’t finished eating, but knew better than to argue when she registered his serious expression. “You’re going to do it, aren’t you?”
It didn’t take him long to admit it. “Yes.”
“Goddamn,” she said under her breath. After their discussion, their relationship, their future was back in flux. And, there he was, telling her that he was going to be with another woman. “Goddamn.”
Pulling her hand away from his grip, Harlow couldn’t stop herself from pushing her chair further from him. Her hand went up through her hair. She let it move to her forehead, to hold the weight of her skull as her elbow took a spot on the table.
“Baby, if you say no—”
“I don’t say no,” she said, her eyes closed. “I would never say no. I would never tell you not to do what you had to do.”
“I know what jealousy is like, how it gnaws at you. I won’t put you through that.”
With her hand still on her forehead, she rolled her gaze to him. “I’m not jealous,” she murmured. “We’ve discussed this.”
One of his eyes narrowed. “It turns you on to think of me with her? You don’t look turned on.”
“I’m not turned on. I’m not jealous… I feel sick.”
“I’m not going to have sex with her,” he said. “There’s something we need. I need to win a hand to get it.”
“What?”
“We want the deed to the club.”
She let her head roll further around. “We do? Why?”
“There’s no reason for her not to put it on the table. She has plenty of money. Other than its worth as the Pothos venue, Windsor’s means nothing to her. We’re in on that, so who owns the club isn’t the problem.”
“I don’t think she’ll mind you having it,” she said. “Remember, Ophelia’s ultimate prize is to be with you. If you own the club, and you’re together, it doesn’t really matter whose name is on the piece of paper.”
“What’s mine is yours.”
“Exactly,” she said. “Why do we want it?”
“Control,” he said. “Because if it’s ours, we can control structural changes… Ultimately, we’ll strip it and sell it.”
Though she’d kind of known it, Harlow was happy to get confirmation. “Pothos isn’t a permanent plan for you?”
“I’m not telling our kids that daddy’s a drug dealer.”
“Much better that he be a grifter,” she said, warming her lips with a smile.
“Haven’t done much of that this year either.”
“You were dead,” she said. “That’s got to be your biggest con yet. You’re entitled to a little time off after that performance… I tell you, I don’t mind admitting it, you really sold it to me.”
26
Something changed in Ryske’s demeanor. He sat up straighter, letting his hands slide to his spread thighs. “Do you still think about it?”
“Think about what? The day you died? Living every minute without you? Reminding myself to breathe when my throat just wanted to close to cut off the oxygen… I despised every breath I took in that world without you.”
“But you want to walk away from me now.”
“I don’t want to,” she said. “I can’t. I just told you that I’m on your crew. Nothing will change that… I love you, Ryske, but… Bale told me I had power over you and I didn’t understand it. I saw glimpses of it, but I didn’t get it until I found out someone died for us… I don’t know, I’m just… I’m just upset by it, that’s all… I know I’m the same way. I don’t think you’re some evil Big Bad Wolf. We just need some perspective.”
“What if I don’t want perspective?”
“I think living with Ophelia will give you it,” she said.
“I don’t know what she’ll want from me, but she’s going to ask me to give her something.”
“I know,” Harlow said. “I agree. She told me as much.”
Resting his forearms on the back of his chair again, he relaxed. “When you talked alone at Windsor’s?” She nodded. “What did she say?”
Anwen could only have told the guys what happened up unt
il the moment Ophelia had dismissed her. “She tried to get in my head,” Harlow said. “It was her who told me about the guard… She said I was temporary in your life and that Anwen was a fool… Though she did also seem impressed that Anwen had seduced you in the way she did.”
“Seduced me? She blackmailed me into screwing her.”
“Ophelia said you spent six months of your life at Anwen’s sexual beck and call,” Harlow said, picking up her beer. “Lucky Anwen.”
He exhaled a snicker. “I’ve been at your sexual beck and call since the minute we met.”
“Since the minute you regained consciousness, maybe,” she said.
They shared a smile. “Hey, I told you to take advantage of me, and that’s an open ended offer… Any time you see a chance to ride me… whether I’m conscious or not, you take it.”
Her lips curled. “You think I don’t know you’re waiting for me to reciprocate?”
“You don’t have to reciprocate, Trink,” he said, tipping some beer into his mouth. “I know you want it from me every minute… I’m not even worried.”
There was no disconnect between sex and love for her with him. Harlow did want to have sex with him, all the time. But she’d never be able to have that physical connection without losing herself in the emotional one.
“Do you think you could have sex with me without loving me?”
“Yes,” he said. “Do I think that will ever happen? No. I’ve told you before, there’s nothing that could make me stop loving you.”
“What if I fucked Bale?”
Ryske’s brows rose and his beer lowered. “You came up with that one fast,” he said and she grinned. “Did you… fuck Bale?” The ease with which he asked the question betrayed that he didn’t really suspect that she had. Harlow didn’t answer right away and gave him a chance to narrow his eyes in suspicion. “What?”
“Nothing, just… he is a doctor and I have been under sedation in his care, so… I wouldn’t really know, would I?”
Ryske put down his beer. The scowl set on his face looked permanent. “That fucker…”
She laughed. “I don’t think he has sex with the patients he sedates.”
“No, but fuck knows what he’s seen… I’m getting your medical records.”
“You mean you’re going to tell Maze to hack my medical records,” she said. “I don’t think doctors who violate their patients write it on their chart… Maybe they have little secret codes… Like… a big O stands for unnecessary enema, and a little one is digital vaginal probing or something.”
He sneered. “Do you really have to put that into my head?”
She laughed. “Maybe hyphen figure-8 means cock gag reflex test.”
“You don’t stop talking, and I’ll give you one of those right here.”
“This is fun,” she said, pinching some food from his plate. “And, hey, if he did it to me… you were under his care for a while too.”
“Yeah,” he said. “Why do you think I’m so worried? It’s nothing to do with you, I’m just sitting over here feeling violated.”
“I watched them strip you that first day,” she said. “Those guys looked like pros… I’d say it’s something they do for fun on a slow weekend.”
“Drug me and take my clothes off?”
“You never know,” she said and grabbed her bottle. “I would.” Sliding back a little, he pulled at the knot on his tie and unfolded his collar to take it off. “What are you doing?”
He lassoed the tie around her neck and began to unbutton his shirt. “As you wish, Trink,” he said. “I’m taking my clothes off.”
Leaping up, she grabbed his hands to stop him going past the third button. “Can you ask them to pack up the food first? I don’t want to be kicked out before we have something to take back for Noon.”
She sat back down, relieved that he’d desisted.
“You spoil him,” Ryske said, twisting to gesture at the server.
“He loves Chinese food almost as much as I do, and this is the best I’ve had so far.”
Ryske charmed the server into packing up their food and then handed over a card that she guessed he’d gotten from Maze. “Want to get a cab or walk?”
“I don’t know,” she said, thinking about the rest of the night. “Maybe I should go back to Clyde’s.”
“Figured that’s where you were staying… You didn’t share a bed with him, did you?”
“This from the man who’s been sleeping with Anwen.”
“That’s different.”
“Why? Because you’ve fucked her before?” she asked. “That makes it worse. Especially since your morning wood can be persistent.”
“That’s me who’s persistent,” he said. “Not the wood.”
“Oh,” she said, accepting his help to stand when he pulled her up and moved behind her to drape his jacket over her shoulders. “Shame. I always liked the idea that you were powerless to stop your cock from taking what it wanted from me.”
“Well, there’s that too.”
The server came to return Ryske’s card and handed over a bag of food. With her prize in one hand and Ryske’s fingers between her others, they went out into the night air.
“You didn’t tell me what the other space would be for,” she said.
“Hmm?”
“The building next to Floyd’s, if it’s the one I’m thinking of, has that big flat roof and the sort of little cabin on top. It’s like a third floor, but it’s only a third of the size… Am I thinking of the wrong building?”
She couldn’t imagine that she was. He’d spoken about connecting the second floor of Floyd’s to the new building over the current narrow alley. There was no building at the other side that could be connected. That was the way Noon drove his car around back. It was a wider lane than the dead end alley.
“No,” he said. “That’s where we’d live… It’s just a shell up there at the moment. The flat roof gives outdoor space and I’d bet there’s space for two, maybe three bedrooms up there.” She stopped to look at him. “What?”
“Where we’d live?”
“Yeah, I know you love Floyd’s, but we couldn’t have kids there. There’s not enough room. We’d be connected to Floyd’s, so you could hang out there whenever you wanted. The kids can run back and forth to their uncles… After the extension across the alley, they can walk right across the roof from our door to Floyd’s. We’ll have a door or a hatch or something put in to Floyd’s roof so they can get straight into Dover’s… They wouldn’t have to go through any bars or past any people.”
The corners of her lips rose. “You’ve really thought about this.”
“About our future? Yeah. I was making plans. I do have a deal with Bale after all… Always thought it was BS, that it wouldn’t matter, ‘cause I never planned on settling down. You changed that and I thought we were on the same page… until tonight.”
“I said I didn’t know if I wanted kids.”
Smiling, he drew a finger down her cheek. “And that works just fine for me. We still need to invest in something for the future… Maze will probably move with us if there aren’t any nippers running around.”
Flabbergasted, Harlow was shocked and awed that he’d put so much thought into it. “I don’t know what to say.”
“It’s okay,” he said. “Nothing is set in stone. You said yourself that you’d always be on the crew. So, I’d want you to be a part of the designing and setting up of it all either way.”
“You always continue to amaze me, you know that?” she said, looping her arm through his and starting to walk again. “You just… you set a goal, figure out what you want, and you do whatever you have to.”
“That’s me,” he said and leaned over to kiss her head. “Never thought it would cost me this though.”
Harlow didn’t want to go over what they’d already discussed. But, there was one topic that they hadn’t discussed enough. “You said that we have to play nice tomorrow night? You’ll play nice with Op
helia, I won’t—”
“You won’t?”
“If I play nice, she’ll know something’s up. We both pretty much admitted that the only way this will end is with one of us dying, so…”
“What?” Now it was his turn to pull them to a halt. “She said what?”
“She said we could be allies or enemies, and if I chose the latter, she’d win…” She sighed. “It’s all about context. I’m not worried.”
“I am,” he said, and pulled her back. “Or have you forgotten that Animal is working for her?”
That reminded her of something else and she raised a finger. “No, but, did Anwen tell you what Brash said to me when we first went inside?”
He thought for a second and then shook his head. “No.”
“He basically threatened to kill me.”
Ryske wasn’t impressed. “And you’re happy about that?”
“Yes,” she said, grabbing his upper arm. “Because he said it in reference to how I was responsible for killing Jarvis Hagan. We both know I wasn’t. He doesn’t. Ophelia has their loyalty, but she must have known she’d never get it if she was honest… She told them that I killed him, or at least she didn’t correct the assumption that I did. We can’t let the cops hear the recording, but…”
“If we need to flip Brash and Animal…” he said, catching on to her thinking. “That’s good, baby. That could be useful.”
“Do we still have the recording?” she asked. “With the fire…”
“Maze has it. You’d have to ask him where,” he said.
They started walking again.
By the time they got to the end of the block, her thoughts had moved on to the following night. “What should I wear tomorrow?”
“You want to know if you should wear panties?” he asked. “We have rules, but if you don’t trust me to keep you safe…”
Harlow dug her nails into his upper arm through his shirt. “No, I mean, should I wear a cocktail dress? Maybe just a slip? Should I go slutty? What are you going to wear?”
“Animal print thong probably,” he said, delivering the reply with sincerity. Harlow didn’t contain her laughter. “I don’t know, baby. Wear whatever you want. What about that beige dress you wore to Bale’s that time?”
Go All In (A Go Novel Book 4) Page 21
