by Holly Jaymes
“Mitch was always good to me. He helped me with my business. He cared about me, but you automatically think what he did was sordid and wrong.”
“You don’t sleep with your friend’s sister. It’s a rule.”
“No, it’s not. Granted, he didn’t tell you, and he felt so guilty about it. I hated his regret. I hated how your friendship was more important to him to my love for him.”
“So that’s how you get back at him? Not tell him about his baby?”
I wanted to slap him but restrained myself. “You’re an asshole, Parker.” I narrowed my eyes as I remembered a comment Mitch had made about suspecting Parker had known about his fiance. “Did you know about Gwen and his partner?”
“No.”
But there was something in his eyes that made me think he wasn’t telling the truth. “You’re lying.”
He rolled his eyes. “I didn’t know about Gwen and the partner, but she made a play for me once when he was out of town. I turned her down because there are rules.”
“She wasn’t his sister. She was his fiancé. It’s not the same.” The idea that he’d think it was the same was mind-boggling. “Don’t think you’re not guilty here too. You didn’t tell him, did you? His best friend didn’t tell him his fiancé was willing to cheat on him.”
“She said she wasn’t thinking right. That she missed him and was feeling lonely. I took her word for it,” he said, taking a seat on the couch.
“You weren’t surprised when he told you,” I said, sharing what Mitch had told me.
Parker shrugged. “Like I said, he’d made a play, so no, I wasn’t surprised.”
“He noticed that you weren’t surprised.” I wondered if I should have been sharing this, but it was too late now.
“So.”
I rolled my eyes. “He suspects you knew and didn’t tell him. He’s right. So you betrayed him too.”
“I guess that makes us even,” he scoffed.
“There is a difference. I’m not your fiance. Plus, Mitch and I said we’d just have a month, and no one would know. Why is your excuse better?”
“You got pregnant,” he said.
“And Mitch walked into his fiancé fucking his partner.”
Parker glared at me.
I kept pushing. “He might have avoided that if his best friend had his back. Maybe he wouldn’t have been so adamant that he couldn’t love again, that I was afraid to tell him how I felt.”
“This isn’t my fault, Hope.”
“It doesn’t have anything to do with you, Parker. That’s the point!” Why was their friendship more important than my feelings for Mitch or his for me, whatever they were.
“He was my friend.”
“He could still be your friend, you dumb ass. He didn’t seduce or use me. We’re consenting adults.”
“It’s weird.”
“Stop thinking about me in bed with him. That is weird.”
“You both stop now,” my mother said, entering the living room again. “We’re here to have dinner. Come on.” She disappeared back into the kitchen.
“I’m not hungry,” Parker said when she left.
“Oh, grow up, Parker.” I snarled at him and then followed my mother, deciding I’d check my attitude and do what I could to salvage this meal.
Somehow Parker pulled it together too, but the meal was still tense. We avoided talking about Mitch, and the baby since that involved Mitch, but eventually, my mother couldn’t take it anymore.
“Mitch isn’t going to take your baby,” she said with certainty.
“How do you know? He has money, and he doesn’t work. It would give him something to do all day,” Parker said with disdain in his voice.
“Because unlike you two, I know Mitch. He might be angry about not being told about the baby or by being punched by you,” my mother started, her face showing disapproval toward Parker. “But he’s a good person deep down. And his mama would talk the same sense into him that I’m trying to talk into you if he did try something like that.”
My mom was right. When I thought about all Mitch had done for me just because he was a good person, I felt even guiltier about not telling him sooner about the baby. He should have found out from me.
“You’re right mom. I owe him an apology, but I’m afraid he won’t accept it.”
“Maybe he will, maybe he won’t. But if he doesn’t, you’re going to have to learn to get along for that baby’s sake.” She turned to Parker. “So, will you.”
“I can't see that happening."
“That’s fine, but there won’t be any fighting or talking bad about him in front of that child. Do you hear me? You both need to stop sulking and think about that baby. One bad word from you about Mitch that this child overhears and I’ll punch you myself.”
My father snorted behind his napkin. My mother quirked a brow at him.
“That’s how your mama won my mother over when she wasn’t too pleased to hear she was going to be a grandma.” My father grinned at my mother.
“Oh, goodness, you didn’t tell them about that, did you?” my mother said.
“Of course, I did. We may have gone about our family backwards, but look at us. We’ve got each other.”
My mother smiled. “Yes, we do.”
“We don’t have much else, and for that I’m sorry, but we’ve got love. What does Mitch have? Money up the wazoo and no one to share it with,” my father pointed out.
Now I felt even worse. He was right. Part of it was Mitch’s fault because he’d secluded himself away in the woods. And while he did have family, he was closed off from others. Any chance I might have had to convince him we could have something special I’d ruined.
“He’s got a dog,” Parker quipped.
“You really are an insensitive child,” I said.
“You can’t hardly blame him,” my mother said. “I heard that his fiancé cheated on him with his business partner.” She looked at me. “It can’t help that he thought you were keeping the baby from him.”
“No. I think that made it worse,” I admitted.
“But you’ve got time. Who knows, maybe everything will work, and Mitch will be a part of the family,” she said. Parents were wise, but I was sure it was wishful thinking on her part and not an insight into Mitch and his ability to forgive and forget.
I waited for Parker to say something snarky, but he sat quietly fuming.
“You know honey, I’ve liked our other family meals better, but I suppose this is why we have them. To be there for each other when the shit hits the fan,” my father said.
My mother patted his hand. “Yes. Now no swearing at the dinner table.”
That evening, I considered driving over to Mitch’s mother’s house to see if I could talk to him, but I didn’t want to ruin their family meal. I thought about going to his house and waiting for him, but that didn’t seem wise either. If he was mad enough, he might not let me in. And if it were late, I’d have to find a place to stay.
Instead, I went home and tried to figure out a way to make up the hurt I’d done to him. What I wanted was to see him, tell him how sorry I was, confess my love for him, have him forgive me, and then we could live happily ever after. But fairy tales weren’t real. The damage I’d done was probably too great. After all, he was a man who’d left his life and lived alone after Gwen and his partner had betrayed him. Chances were, he’d feel an even greater need to protect himself.
No matter what, he’d be here for his child. That I was sure of. He might even move back to the area to be closer. Perhaps the baby was my inroad to fixing things with Mitch. I probably wouldn’t have the great love of my life like I wanted, but maybe we could be friends, or at least friendly.
To that end, I needed to let him know about every doctor’s visit and every milestone of the pregnancy, like when I first felt the baby kick. He’d need to be here for birth classes and setting up a nursery at my house. Maybe he’d let me help set one up in his.
It ate at me h
ow royally I’d messed up something that had the potential to be so happy and beautiful with him. I was a good person who made a mistake, and Mitch was a good person that would do what was best for his child. Somehow, we’d forge some sort of relationship that would work.
As I lay in bed thinking about how we’d raise this child together, I had a thought that maybe someday he’d meet another woman. It seemed unlikely considering his past, and what I’d done, but perhaps there was a woman out there who’d get past his guard and not be afraid, to be honest with her love for him. It would kill me to see him loving another woman.
I let out a loud groan at my stupidity. I’d have to learn to live with whatever he gave me, but how I wished he’d give me a chance to love him.
Book 3: Chapter 24—Coming Clean
Coming Clean
Mitch
I waited on the front porch for the pizza and threw a silent thank you to my mother that she kept all of my brothers from hunting me down on the porch. Walking in with pizza might give me a slight reprieve from the questions my brothers would be bombarding me with, but eventually, they’d start asking.
I paid the pizza kid giving him a big tip, and then carried the six boxes of Italian pie into the house. I could hear everyone in the enclosed back porch talking. I considered putting on a smile, but they’d all know it was fake. Instead, I took a breath to steady my emotions and opened the door while balancing all the boxes of pizza on one hand.
“Oh, thank goodness,” I heard Gabe say. “Let me help you, Mitch.” He took three of the boxes and set them on the table. My mom was sitting at the table with Annabelle on her lap. Sam was sitting next to her, and Hallie was on the other side, cooing at the baby.
Nate was sitting in a lounge chair drinking his beer while Will was outside burning something on the grill.
“Mitch has saved the day,” Nate said holding up his beer.
Will ignored it all and flipped something that might have been a burger but now looked like a hockey puck on the grill.
“I get no respect,” he said with humor.
“I could teach you if you wanted,” I said, setting my boxes on the table.
“What’s the fun in that?” He turned the grill off, shut the lid and then made his way up to the porch.
“You’re just going to leave them on there?” I asked.
“I turned it off,” he said like it made total sense.
I shook my head, figuring I’d clean it later.
I sat at the table, waiting for the questions. I guessed my mother told them not to say anything because the conversation was around Hallie’s pregnancy and Annabelle’s newest achievement. I relaxed, enjoying being around my family without the pressure of being the center of attention. Even so, I felt their support even though we weren’t talking about me.
After pizza, my mom brought out the cookies she’d made that day. Sam wanted the recipe, so she and my mother went inside. Hallie tagged along saying something about too much testosterone on the deck.
When the door closed behind her, I felt my brothers’ gaze on me and all of a sudden, I didn’t feel so relaxed.
“So,” Will was the one who led things off. “You gonna tell us why Parker wanted to kick your ass?”
“He got one in,” Nate said. “Does it hurt?”
I shook my head, although it did feel bruised.
“We know why Parker clocked you,” Gabe said. “For sleeping with Hope. I want to know about the bit about taking responsibility and what was good for a child.”
“Yeah, what was that about?” Will asked.
They all looked at me, waiting for my response.
“Ah, fuck.” I dug the heels of my palms into my eye sockets. “It’s all just fucked up.”
“Why don’t you tell us,” Gabe said.
“Then we’ll go kick Parker’s ass,” Will said.
“No, don’t do that.” That would be just what I needed, a feud between our families. Somehow I didn’t think that would be good for my kid.
Will shrugged. “I’ll fuck him up with a government inquiry then. I’ve got friends.”
I smiled, knowing he was kidding. At least I hoped so. As the owner of a government security contracting business, chances were he really could fuck Parker up with some sort of inquiry.
My brothers were annoying and nosy, but deep down, they had my back. So I prepared to spill the story.
“You were right about Hope and me,” I admitted.
“Well, duh,” Nate said.
“Christ, not you too,” Will rolled his eyes.
“No worries, Will. Nothing is going to come of it. Nothing ever was going to come of it.” At least that I could be sure of.
“Why the fuck not?” Gabe shook his head. “Why would you not accept the love of a good woman that you love?”
“Because it’s more complicated than that.” I sucked in a breath. “She’s pregnant.”
There was silence until Will started laughing.
“It’s not funny, man,” Gabe said.
“It’s funny because dad was always afraid I’d be the one to knock someone up,” Will replied.
I nodded. “Mom thought it would be you,” I said to Gabe, who looked surprised by the news.
“If you love each other, what’s the issue?” Nate asked.
“One, I don’t believe she loves me and two, she didn’t tell me about it. I learned about the pregnancy by accident from Parker, who at the time didn’t know I was the father. I guess he found out today.” I tentatively touched my jaw.
“She does love you, or at least cares for you.” Gabe echoed what my mother had said, but I still didn’t believe it. She’d been so cool to me when I’d shown up to help her move to Parker’s place.
“What was that about accusing them of wanting your money. You don’t think that do you?” Nate asked.
“Honestly, I don’t know what to think. All I know is that I took her in, helped her with her business, and fell for her. Then she shit all over my heart.” I wondered if there was something about me that attracted women who lied.
“The problem you have now, Mitch, is that you can’t cut your losses like you did with Gwen,” Will said, stating the obvious. “How are you going to raise a kid with a woman you don’t trust, and the uncle of your baby wants to kick your ass?”
“The kid has three other uncles that will kick back,” Nate said.
“I have no idea how it’s going to work, only that I will make it work somehow. I’ve learned to cope with betrayal before.”
“Run is more like it,” Gabe murmured.
I looked at him. “I like my life. It was a good life. It’s the women I choose that fuck it up.”
“Thank goodness you’ve learned your lesson,” Will said. “We’ll be the bachelor uncles to their rugrats.”
“I’m still going to be a father.” Saying it still made my head spin. “Jesus. A father.”
Nate slapped me on the back. “I know how you feel man. Gabe here says being a father is most excellent though.”
“You’ll be good at it, no doubt,” Gabe said. “You’re already great with Annabelle.”
“I know you like your life is in the mountains, but is there a chance you’ll move back in this area to be closer to your kid?” Nate asked.
“Nate, I have no idea what I’m doing when I leave here, much less what I’m going to do about co-parenting with Hope.”
“Whatever you decide, we have your back. If you’re going to go for custody, we’ll testify that Parker hit and threatened you,” Will said. I had the feeling he was feeling annoyed that he didn’t get a chance to kick Parker’s ass.
“You should think before taking a child away from a parent,” Sam said from the doorway. She gave me a sympathetic smile. “Sorry, I overheard. It’s just that when I taught, I had students in my class that had parents fighting over them, and it didn’t turn out well for the kids.”
I nodded. “What’s best for my child. That’s what I want.”
“Sure.” He went to the house and got the baby.
“You gonna be able to do that by yourself?” Will asked as Gabe came back with the baby.
“You just said you’d have my back.”
Will looked horrified. “I don’t know anything about kids.”
Nate laughed. “That was priceless, Mitch. I don’t know that I ever saw Will look so scared.”
That night, I stayed in my childhood bedroom that I’d shared with Gabe at my mother’s home. She was worried about me driving home while upset. I wanted to be back in the woods in my own bed, and yet I couldn’t deny having my mother dote over me appealed to me. I was exhausted emotionally and utterly confused as to what I should do next.
By the time I was out of bed and taking a morning walk with Duke through my childhood neighborhood, I decided I needed to see a lawyer to protect my rights and figure out child support. I wondered if I could make a trust for my child that would prevent Hope from using the money for her parents or her business. I wanted her to be comfortable and not stressed financially, but I didn’t want her taking advantage of me and expecting to live like what she’d grown up with on my dime.
“How are you feeling?” my mother asked me when I walked into the kitchen after my walk.
“Ready to meet the challenges ahead. I need to find a lawyer specializing in family law.” I figured my business lawyer could help me with the financial trust issue.
My mother quirked a brow. “Are you going to sue for custody?”
“No. But I’m going to protect my rights.”
“Good.” She patted me on the shoulder. “You need to work with Hope for the child’s sake.”
“Yes, I know.”
“You’re a good man, Mitch. I know you’ve had bad luck with the ladies, but don’t let that spoil your heart for love.”
I shrugged as I got a drink of water.
“I’m not convinced that Hope and you can’t work something out.”
“I can’t trust her, mom.”
