Submitting to the Alpha (Submission Book 1)

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Submitting to the Alpha (Submission Book 1) Page 18

by Emilia Rose


  He pushed me behind a tree and grabbed my shirt, ripping it open. “I do take what I want, when I want,” he said, fingers grazing against my skin and lighting it ablaze. My chest burned, and suddenly my whole body felt like it was on fire.

  My core was throbbing. My head was aching. My skin felt like it was searing off.

  I squeezed my eyes closed and grasped onto him. His eyes turned black—the color of his wolf’s—and he brushed his teeth against my neck where Roman’s mark should’ve been.

  Oh, Moon Goddess, no. My heat. It was here. Now.

  Before the rogue could take my clothes off himself, I ripped them off of my body. It was too hot for this. Too fucking hot. I was sweating. My breathing became ragged, like I was gasping for breath but didn’t want to breathe too deeply or I’d get a mouthful of dry air, slowly killing me from the inside out.

  So much pressure built in my chest that I couldn’t hold myself up any longer. I collapsed to my knees, and he unbuckled his belt, taking his cock out. I shook my head, but my wolf purred, wanting him. My eyes shifted back and forth between hers and mine, and for a moment I almost lost control.

  But I grabbed a hold of myself. I didn’t know how long I’d be able to do this, but I made a promise to Ryker that my heat wouldn’t get in the way of doing my job as a Lycan. I wasn’t about to have Roman not marking me make me lose this position as a Lycan.

  The rogue grabbed my arms and pulled me to my feet. Just as he was about to plunge himself inside of me, I grabbed his cock in my hand, my claws digging into it. He released me, grasping himself.

  “Stop.”

  My wolf jumped inside of me, wanting to be released. She had never wanted something so crazy. She wanted him. She wanted this rogue. She wanted him to fuck us.

  “You fucking whore.” He wrapped a hand around my throat, pinning me to the tree. A tear slipped from my eye, and I whimpered. This couldn’t be happening. This couldn’t be happening. This wasn’t how I wanted to be mated.

  Without thinking, I swiped my claws across his neck and killed him instantly. I collapsed onto the ground, stretching out as much as I could and trying to cool down in the dirt. “Raj!” I shouted. “Raj!”

  I listened to someone run through the woods, and Raj appeared at my feet. His eyes were wide and wolf-gold, and he looked down at me with so much fucking lust, I knew that he wanted the same thing that the rogue wanted. To mark me. To put a woman out of her heat.

  That innate need was coded into every single unmated werewolf. It was so natural to want to help a she-wolf through their heat, to stop them from hurting, to make them theirs.

  Some rogues exited the bar and saw me leaning against the tree—clothes torn off, body dripping with sweat, need radiating off of me in waves. And, suddenly, they raced toward me.

  Raj approached me slowly, controlled by his wolf and his wolf only. His ears lifted, listening to the rogues.

  “Raj,” I said, tears streaming down my cheeks. I could barely move. Everything ached beyond belief. He grabbed my arm, pulled me up, and wrapped an arm around my waist. His skin on mine was the only cool thing on my body.

  It felt so good that I couldn’t help but beg for him to touch me more. My wolf took control. “More Raj,” I begged. “It’s too much.”

  Chapter 38

  Roman

  I gazed at the man in the fucking mirror and sighed. I could barely recognize myself after I let my mate leave me without putting up much of a fight. A part of me hoped that she wouldn’t go through with it. A part of me hoped that this was all some fucked up dream. But she was stubborn, and this was all my fault.

  She should be with me. She should’ve been on the team. Not Vanessa. But I was so fucking jealous and terrified that Ryker would take her away from me that I couldn’t let it happen. Now it had happened.

  My mate was at his pack, living in his house, getting close to that asshole.

  Any day she could go through heat. Any fucking day. And I had no way of knowing when it was. Would she be strong enough to resist any other guy who wanted to mate her? There were plenty of wolves who would love the chance. Would she be strong enough to fight off the men to keep herself for me? Not with Ryker living in that house with her. He would take her, and he wouldn’t even care.

  Why had I let her leave again?

  I shook my head and adjusted my tie. She would be at the Night Raider’s Café tonight for the full moon party, and I was going to go to get her back. I’d drag her back if I had to, I’d placed her on the warriors, I’d… I stopped. I couldn’t. She was to be a Lycan for at least a year. A vow to the Lycans was as scared as divine law, and she couldn’t break divine law.

  Tonight, I would go to see her, even if it was in passing. To smell her vanilla sweetness again, if I had a chance.

  I gazed down at my dresser which was covered with all my late-night drawings of her. It was the dresser I emptied for her, the dresser I left her mate’s necklace on. And, when I looked at it, all I saw was the devastated expression she gave me when I told her I wouldn’t mark her before she left me.

  Vanessa knocked two times on the door and walked into my room—uninvited.

  Why the fuck did I even let her stay with me again? Did I not respect my mate that much to force her out? I lost all my damn respect for myself when I told her yes and told Derek that I would take care of Vanessa’s living arrangements after one of her water pipes burst.

  She drew her finger across my dresser, then she touched me. Yes, she touched me.

  Her finger grazed up my neck, and I let her. So fucking stupid. But it felt better than nothing. All I could picture were her fingers as Isabella’s. Teasing me like she always did. She never even had to try.

  “You look so good,” she purred. “So, you decided to be my date for tonight?”

  I swallowed hard and took her hand off of me. “Vanessa, what did I tell you about overstepping your boundaries?”

  She gazed up at me through her long lashes that she had dressed in over a hundred coats of mascara. “Oh, come on Roman, don’t act like you haven’t ever thought about me.” She smirked and hopped onto my bed, breasts bouncing as she did. “I know you have.”

  She was right. I had.

  “Thinking about all the things you would do to me.” She grabbed my hand and put it around her throat. “Wrapping your hand around my throat, fucking me like you used to fuck Isabella.”

  I wrapped my hand around her throat, dug my claws into her neck, and thrusted her off the bed and up against the wall. Then squeezed.

  This was the only thing I had thought about doing to her, but I hadn’t been man enough to do it yet.

  “I should’ve never let you live as a warrior. You’re beneath me. You’re beneath her. You’re beneath us.” I growled. “You will never have a chance with me. I have a mate.”

  Her cheeks reddened. “A mate?” She spat. “She’s at the café right now with someone else.”

  My hand tightened around her throat. She was lying.

  “Jane sent me pictures of them,” she said. “She even said that she was marked.”

  Both my hands slipped around her throat, and I lifted her off the floor. I wished that I could snap her neck right here, right now. She dug her nails into me, her eyes wide. “Leave before I kill you,” I seethed in her ear. It took everything I had to let go of her.

  She fell to her knees and gasped for breath as I walked to the other side of the room, trying to calm myself down. A minute went by, then another, and that bitch was still in my room. “Get out, Vanessa.” I gazed out of the window, clenching my jaw. “Don’t make me say it again.”

  She scurried out of the room, and when she was gone, I sat on the bed and dug my claws into the bedsheets. My Isabella was marked. My Isabella was with another man right now.

  I had waited three years for her, turned down everyone and anyone for her, then fucking refused to mark her.

  My wolf growled inside of me, ready to kill anyone who dared to touch our mate.<
br />
  Vanessa had to be lying. She had to. She always did.

  I needed to get down there now to see with my own eyes, to see what my mate had done because of my stupid decisions. My mind was too scrambled to believe anyone anymore, even myself.

  Chapter 39

  Isabella

  Raj pushed me into the side of a tree and pressed his lips to my neck. They moved so effortlessly on my skin and felt so cool. I rested my head back against the tree bark and closed my eyes.

  His scruff tickled my skin, and I pulled him closer. Everything about him felt so good. His muscles rippling under his shirt; his sweet butterscotch, the way he grabbed me and held me against him.

  When his canines brushed against my soft spot, I shook in total pleasure. Just waiting, wanting, craving to be marked. My wolf howled inside of me, not being able to resist his touch.

  “Please, Raj,” I whispered. “It feels so…” I let out a small moan. “It feels so good.”

  He gripped my hips, and instinctively I pushed my body against his. He was so much cooler than I was. And when he licked the crook of my neck, I moaned louder—letting everyone hear me and not caring at all.

  The moonlight filed through the trees and made my mate’s necklace glow on the ground, near my clothes. I tensed. My mate, Roman. What would he think about this? He’d hate me.

  He already hates us. My wolf howled in my mind. Raj doesn’t. Raj wants to help us!

  My breath hitched. I didn’t want this. I couldn’t want this. No matter how much I hated him. I couldn’t betray Roman until he rejected me. It was too wrong.

  “Raj,” I said, trying my hardest to keep my voice steady. I lifted my gaze from his shoulder and gazed at the group of rogues coming our way.

  Mate! Anyone will do! So hot. Please.

  I pressed my hands to his chest, my palms so cold, and pushed him back. “Raj, stop.” His teeth grazed against my neck again, and I resisted the urge to moan. “The rogues.”

  Immediately, Raj tensed. He pulled away, his eyes flickering back and forth between his wolf and his human, tore his hands off me, and placed them in fists next to me on the tree. He parted his lips. “Isabell—”

  “The rogues,” I said, pointing behind us.

  My wolf jumped up and down inside of me. More people for mates! More people! Just our type!

  They were all staring at me. They were all coming for me. They could all feel me.

  Soon everyone would be able to feel me, feel this need to be satisfied, and it terrified me. All I could see were werewolves tearing each other apart to see who could get to me first. All I could hear were them growling viciously over my body. All I could feel was dread and misery.

  “Raj,” I said again. He gazed over his shoulder, sucked in a deep breath, and bared his teeth. I wasn’t sure if he did so because he was about to kill them all or because he wanted to sink his teeth into me and claim me.

  Claim us! Claim us!

  “Go,” he ordered.

  I shook my head. “No.” Even though I wanted to leave. There were far too many of them for him to take on alone. I needed to suck it up and fight with him, or he’d die. And I took an oath to protect my partner when I joined the Lycans. I wasn’t about to—

  “Go! I’ll keep them off of you.”

  “But—”

  He snapped his head in my direction. “If you don’t go now, I will sink my teeth into your neck.” His eyes flickered to my neck and darkened, and he shook his head. “Go!”

  And with that, I ducked under his arm and sprinted through the woods. My wolf was trying to hold me back, begging me to stay, to let someone else mark me, to put me out of this misery. But I fought against our natural instinct and continued to run. I ran and ran and ran.

  When Ryker and I had talked about my heat, we had decided that when it came I should go to the only place where I would be safe: the Lycans. But with all the unmated wolves in the Lycans, I couldn’t go back there.

  So I ran through the woods, never shifting into my wolf in fear that she would betray me and mate with whoever she wanted. I needed to get away from everyone. I needed to get through this. I needed my mate.

  When Roman’s packhouse came into my view, my heart thumped in my chest. His scent lingered everywhere. On the lawn, on the dirt, on the door. I barged through the backdoor and sprinted to his bedroom. Vanessa’s scent lingered by one of the spare rooms, and I nearly ripped her door open, but I was too far gone.

  Roman. I needed Roman, my mate.

  Everything was so hot. So fucking hot. Beads of sweat rolled down my forehead, and I wiped it off with the back of my hand. When I made it up the stairs, I ran to Roman’s room and pushed the door open. Ready to be marked and mated.

  Roman’s scent lingered in the air, so strong yet so weak. I walked into the empty room and slammed the door shut. After pushing the short dresser in front of the door and the tall dresser in front of his window, I clenched my fists.

  He wasn’t here, and that made everything hurt worse. Since I stepped onto this property, my body had burned hotter. I felt like I was standing in a fire pit with the beads of sweat rolling down my forehead and the unruly boiling of my blood.

  Nobody would find me here, at least, and if I shifted into my wolf, I wouldn’t be able to leave. It was perfect enough to make it through the night.

  I shuffled through Roman’s closet, sticking my nose into his clothes and smelling his scent. It was so calming, yet it just made me ache more. I wanted him to mark me. Needed him to mark me now. But he was probably out with Vanessa at the damn nightclub, doing things to her that I didn’t even want to think about but couldn’t stop.

  My wolf growled and bared her teeth at the thought. Another wave of heat hit me, making me pant for something—anything—cool.

  I flung open the bathroom door, started the cold water, and watched it fill up the bathtub. When the bath was half-full, I jumped in, unable to resist it. It was cold—freezing almost—but it didn’t stop that lingering ache.

  Why the fuck did this hurt so bad? Why the hell was my life like this? Roman didn’t go through heat. Roman didn’t know how fucking hard this was because he refused to mark me. Roman didn’t know how much pain I was in. He didn’t. He wouldn’t. Ever.

  My heart ached, and when the cold water wasn’t doing it for me anymore, I turned the faucet back on, and rested the crook of my neck right on the rushing water, letting it cool me slightly. The bath filled until the water was sloshing over the edge.

  I leaned back and groaned loudly. This was too much. Too fucking much.

  In a bath full of cold water, I was sweating. No goosebumps, just pure beads of sweat. My wolf clawed her way through me. I needed to get out. Out of here. Now.

  Mate. I needed to find a mate. My mate. Any mate.

  I jumped out of the water, trying to fight my wolf, but not being able. I landed on all fours and shifted into my wolf, listening to my bones crack but not feeling anything other than this heat. She sprinted to the door, on her hands and feet like the wild fucking animal she was.

  She growled at the dressers in front of the door, shook away the sweat, and clawed at the wood. Small pieces jammed into the pads of our paws, but she didn’t care. Over and over and over, our claws dug into it, destroying it and ripping it to pieces.

  Stop, I demanded, but my wolf didn’t listen.

  Mate. Need mate. Need a mate now.

  I could barely breathe. All this fur was making it warmer, hotter, and dryer. She continued to claw and claw, and I wished Roman would just break through the door at any moment.

  My head hurt. My vision blurred.

  After what seemed like hours with no success, I whimpered. I begged my wolf to stop. I couldn’t handle it. She was suffocating me.

  Wave after wave of heat rolled through me. I shifted and laid on the warm ground, tears rolling down my cheeks. I rolled into a ball, then stretched out—unable to find a comfortable position.

  I stumbled to my feet and away
from the door, so I couldn’t move the dressers myself. Honestly, at this point, I didn’t even think I had enough strength to do that. I eyed the one by the window which had been untouched by my wolf. And a part of me wanted to just hurl myself out of the window, smack against the ground, and pass out.

  Everything was more intense than it had been, and much hotter. So much hotter.

  Bed. My wolf said. Cool down.

  I held onto whatever I could as my legs shook uncontrollably. I couldn’t see anything. I moved around the room, my hands on the walls, searching for the thermostat. When I found it, I turned it down as much as I could. I wanted to freeze.

  Then I collapsed onto the edge of the bed, crawled desperately to the pillows, and laid—spread eagle—on Roman’s bed. Cool. I needed to be cool.

  I stared up at the ceiling, but I could see nothing but darkness.

  Tears fell from my eyes. Everything hurt so bad. I needed my mate. I needed him. Couldn’t he feel the pain I was in? Why wasn’t he coming to get me? Why wasn’t he coming to save me?

  Chapter 40

  Roman

  Cayden pressed a hand against my chest, trying to stop me from storming toward the café. “Calm down, Roman.”

  I pushed him away from me and snatched his collar. “I’ll tell you one last time to get out of my fucking way.” My body shook with rage. Isabella was so close that I could smell her.

  “Or what?” he asked, eyes wide. “You’ll kill me for your senseless mistakes?”

  My wolf growled, and I bared my teeth at my beta.

  He shook his head, unafraid of me. “If you go into that club while she’s working and approach her like that, everything is going to fall apart.”

  “She’s not working. She’s with a fucking guy who fucking marked her having a good fucking time.” I released him and continued to storm through the woods to the nightclub. Music thumped through the forest, the scent of alcohol becoming almost unbearable.

  Suddenly, someone screamed—at the top of their lungs—and the music stopped. I collapsed onto all fours, my nails lengthening into claws and my bones snapping, and lifted my nose to the moon, taking off toward the nightclub as Cayden followed us.

 

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