by Josie Walker
I didn’t realize how starved for conversation I’d become. The more time I spent with the prisoner, the better communication became. His name is Endingo, and he explained that he has a computer chip in his brain which allows him to learn languages easily. This makes me realize his people are more technologically advanced, like the Krinar. My friends have similar types of devices.
As a direct result of spending so much time in the dungeon, I’ve been spending less and less time up in the tower as De-Var’s apprentice. The lure of someone to talk to has proven to be irresistible to me. I do go to the tower in the late afternoon and work for a bit so that I’m there when Bocc-d’ar comes to get me for dinner. Part of me feels guilty for my deception, but I can’t seem to make myself stop.
In the mornings after breakfast I bring food to the dungeon for the prisoner because he’s so thin I fear they’re starving him. At first I was afraid of him, but now I feel ashamed that I felt that way. I hate to admit I was so shallow, but I think I judged him on his looks.
The things Endingo has told me are making me question the trust I placed in the trident man. Endingo isn’t strong and handsome like Bocc-d’ar but it appears that he, like me, was imprisoned here through no fault of his own. Every day he’s told me a little more of his story and slowly gained my trust. In return, I’ve told him of my life on Earth.
He was so sympathetic when I told him about my childhood. Even though he didn’t understand what the foster system is, he confided that he also experienced the pain of growing up alone because Bocc-d’ar’s people killed his parents. How can I possibly have feelings for an alien? I feel guilty over how much I look forward to seeing Bocc-d’ar every evening. I wish there were someone else I could talk to, but no one else understands me.
I’m so confused. And the captive in the dungeon is the only one talking to me. Endingo’s people are called the Hock-ver, and Bocc-d’ar’s people are called the Ro-heem. They have been at war with each other for some time. Bocc-d’ar, he said, is one of the rulers of the five Ro-heem kingdoms. According to Endingo, he inherited the title from his father, not through any particular merit of his own. This doesn’t seem quite right, because from what I’ve seen Bocc-d’ar’s men respect him, but I’ve been wrong before.
Endingo’s people have tried to make peace many times, but the Ro-heem are never interested. In fact that is why he is a prisoner here. Endingo came alone to negotiate peace regarding a land dispute, but was imprisoned for his efforts. He said the Hock-ver and Ro-heem have always been at war over the ownership of various parcels of land on this planet, which is called Meturgia.
Endingo was very interested in my life before I came here, so I told him of my friend Sarah and how we came to be on the planet Sagren. He was most intrigued to learn more of the Krinar, and each time I visit he always has more questions to ask about them. I don’t really care much what we talk about, just having conversations again is simply amazing. My step is light as I descend the familiar rough stone path to his cell.
“BEEE . . . YOOO . . . TIFUL GOOOD MORNINGSSS, TESSSSA,” he says when I appear.
“Good morning, Endingo. I have a special treat for you.” I pass a delicious goodie through the bars of his cell. I don’t remember what Bocc-d’ar called it, but it’s basically a sweet roll.
“THANKSSS TOOO YOOO,” he replies graciously.
“Your English has gotten so much better since we first met,” I praise him.
“YESSS. THE LISSS . . . ENING OF YOUR WORDSSS . . . IT HELPSSS MUCH.“
“I’m glad to help.”
“QUESTIONSSS I HAVE OF THE EARTHHH PLANET.”
“Yes, what would you like to know?”
“WHY DID EARTHLINGSSS NOT . . . FIGHT? YESSS THAT ISSS WORD . . . FIGHT . . . THE INVADERSSS, THE KRINAR?”
“Well, when the Krinar came they were so much more technologically advanced than we were on Earth. It would have been useless to fight them. It saved many lives to not fight a battle we could not win.”
“AHHH. YOOO SSSURENDER?”
“Yes.”
“NOOO FIGHT?”
“Yes, that’s right. No fight.”
“INTERESSSTING.”
“I guess so,” I say.
“AND THISSS OTHER PLANET . . . SSSA-GRIND?”
“Sagren,” I correct him automatically.
“NONE LIVESSS THERE?”
“That’s right. The Krinar were studying it for expansion. So far it appears to be safe for habitation.”
“ARE THERE SSSOLDIERSSS THERE FOR TO GUARD PLANET?” he asks, his curiosity evident.
“Uh, no. I don’t think there’s anyone there right now, except maybe those from the science team who were left when we were captured. They might still be there.”
“THE RO-HEEM MAKE YOU PRISSSONER LIKE ME,” he states sadly.
“Yes, they did. But unlike you, I’ve been treated well.” I feel almost guilty at the freedoms I’ve been given compared to my fellow prisoner.
“FOR NOW. UNTIL HE KILLSSS YOOO.”
“What? No. Bocc-d’ar’s not like that. He’s been really nice to me. He actually risked his life to save me when I tried to escape in the woods. Without him those Sprek beasts would have killed me.”
“WITHOUT HIM . . . YOOO NOT HEEREW,” Endingo says bluntly.
“Well, I guess that’s true. But it could be worse.”
“WORSSSE. YESSS. YOOO WILL BEEE. DEAD YOOO, LIKE OTHER FEMALESSS.”
“What do you mean?” Apprehension makes the hairs on my arms stand on end. “Do you know what happened to the other women? I’ve wondered why there are only men on this planet.”
“EVERY METAL CHILD . . . IT BRINGSSS DEATH TO MOTHER.”
My head is spinning, trying to understand if he’s saying what I think he is. “Do you mean that when a woman gives birth to a baby, she could die if the father was a metal man?”
“YESSS,” his response is instant. “NOT COULD. ALWAYSSS. MOTHERSSS DIE ALWAYSSS.”
I grab the bars with my hands, swaying sharply as I fear I’m going to pass out. This explains why there are no women in the castle. Like a punch in the gut I realize I could already be pregnant. No wonder Bocc-d’ar wants to have sex constantly.
I thought he cared about me, but Endingo has opened my eyes. All Bocc-d’ar wants is a child to carry on his terrifying legacy. I’m expendable. They probably think of women as flesh and blood incubators. Their sole purpose is to carry a baby to term. They probably don’t even care that the birth of the metal head monster will kill the unwilling mother.
When was my last period? When I realize that I haven’t had one since he first kidnapped me, I blanch. I’m going to die. I’m pregnant and I’m going to be ripped apart just like in the Aliens franchise.
Endingo is talking, but there is such a roaring in my head that I haven’t been listening.
“What did you say?” I ask, straining to focus.
“HISSS CHILD . . . IT INSSSIDE YOOO?”
“Maybe? I don’t know. Shit! Probably.” I don’t even try to tell him that this is inappropriate conversation. We’ve gone way past propriety by this point.
“NOW. WE GOESSS NOW,” he barks emphatically.
“What? We can’t go anywhere. You’re locked up. And I already told you the forest is unsafe. I tried to escape once and almost died.”
“I KNOW WAY. . . ESSS . . . CAPE. SSSAVE YOOO FROM MONSTER INSSSIDE YOOO. KNOW WAY GET RID OFFF.”
I clutch a hand to my belly. Can this be real? Am I pregnant? I know the answer to my unspoken question is most likely yes. Could I kill my own baby to save myself? I’ve never thought abortion was a solution to anyone’s problems. But I never thought I’d be abducted by aliens either.
“IT MONSSS . . .TER,” he says as if he can read my mind. “NOT BABY. WILL KILL. BAD LIKE FATHHHER.”
“But . . .” I
start to argue, but I don’t have a clue what to say. It’s too much information to take in all at once.
“YOO AND ME, ESSS . . . CAPE. MY PEEPLE REMOVE MONSSSTER INSSSIDE YOO. YOO NOT DIE. LIVE.”
“You can do that?” I ask, half in horror that I’m considering it, and half in relief that it is even possible.
“YESSS. MUCH KNOWLEDGE MY PEOPLE HAVE. AND WE HELP RESSSCUE OTHERSSS . . . THE KRINAR. YOOO WISSSH RETURN EARTH?”
“You could take me and my friends back to Earth?”
“YESSS! EARTH!” he repeats excitedly.
“But, you’re locked up. How do I break you out?”
“KEY.”
He points to the right of his cage. I walk in that direction, and sure enough there is a large key hanging on a hook. How have I failed to notice this before now? It was in plain sight! I return to unlock the door, and just like that he steps out into the hall. He grabs my hand, turning in the opposite direction of how I usually come in.
“But don’t we need to go the other way to get out?” I ask.
“NOOO. COME. TRAVEL UNDER WALL WE DO,” he explains.
As he tugs me down the tunnel I can’t help but wonder if I’ve made a mistake. I’m fleeing the castle without any advanced warning or planning. Should I have gathered provisions first? It’s not like I can just ask Bocc-d’ar to tell me the truth!
On the off chance that I’m somehow not already pregnant, I need to get out now. I don’t want to risk sex with Bocc-d’ar even one more time. I never wanted to have kids. I’m not qualified to handle any of this emotionally.
But it would be selfish of me to ignore the chance to help my friends. Endingo says he can help us all and take us back to Earth. I try to stay strong for the others’ sake, but I feel far from courageous.
I move in a daze, following Endingo who seems to know exactly where to go. I should be comforted by his calm, but I’m to freaked out. What if he’s not really able to protect me? I’m too young for this shit.
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
Preen
The pounding on my door alerts me to the fact that Dorn is back again. Ever since he found out I’m carrying his baby he’s been maintaining an almost constant vigil outside my door. He thinks that since he’s the head of security he can push me around and bully me into talking with him. But I’m a kick-ass bodyguard, not some weak human he can manhandle.
He’s always been abrasive and gruff, but this is a whole new level. When will he get a clue? I still can’t remember why I ever slept with him. I never would have let him touch me if I’d suspected I might get pregnant.
I normally have nerves of steel, but each blow on the door to my quarters makes me flinch. I’d escape him if I could, but we’re all trapped on this spaceship together until we reach the mother planet. I’m not ready to be a mother. I’m too young. And I certainly don’t want to raise a child with someone like Dorn.
“Open the door, Preen,” Dorn yells at the top of his lungs, loud enough for everyone on board to hear.
I ignore him, being as quiet as I can. Hopefully he’ll think I’m not here and give up.
“I know you are in there!”
So much for pretending I’m not in. “Go away, Dorn,” I holler through the closed door.
“You can’t keep avoiding me.”
“Oh, yeah? Watch me.”
“Open the damn door, Preen!” He punctuates each word with his fists beating a staccato rhythm on the door. His crazy is just adding fuel to the fire of my already insane mood. “You owe me that much at least!”
“I owe you nothing. The fact that I let you park your dick in my vagina a few times doesn’t give you any rights. So fuck off, Dorn!”
The irony of my somewhat lame comeback hurts, because said vagina has totally betrayed me. Why didn’t I sleep with Zalken instead? Or better yet, I should have just kept my legs shut and then I wouldn’t be in this predicament.
The relentless pounding continues on the door. It’s driving me out of my ever loving mind. Why, oh why did I ever sleep with that man? Who cares if the sex was the best I’ve ever had? There aren’t enough orgasms in the world to make up for the complication that this pregnancy has wrought on my once simple life.
Sex with Dorn got me in this impossible situation, but sex won’t get me out of it. Since sex is all I ever wanted from him, I have no further use for him in my life. I’ve made it clear that I want nothing to do with him, so why won’t he just go away? This baby is enough drama all on its own. I certainly don’t need the sperm donor in the mix.
“It’s my child too, Preen! You can’t leave me out of this!” he shouts again. Then he body slams the door, to make sure I haven’t forgotten he’s out there, I guess. As if I could!
I’m a movie junkie, so of course my mind inserts a picture of Dorn pregnant with his own child like Arnold Schwarzenegger in Junior. It’s too bad Dorn isn’t the one who got knocked up. Then I could just walk away, and he’d have the baby. If only life were so simple. A pesky voice in my subconscious tells me that I’m lying to myself, that I’d never really be able to walk away from my child. But I’m not in the mood to listen to crazy talk.
Once again I consider giving the baby away to an infertile Krinar couple. Pregnancy is so rare for my people. There are so many Krinar who would want this child. What happened on Sagren was such a fluke. What if this is my only shot at having a child? Can I really give my baby away just because the timing sucks?
It’s impossible to get any privacy on this ship. How can I think when he’s constantly hounding me and wanting to bully me into a decision I’m not ready to make. Part of me wishes that we would hurry up and get to Krina, but another part of me wishes I could delay the arrival forever. I’m not ready to face the elders . . . or worse . . . my parents. I left on a science mission, but instead of bringing back rock samples I got knocked up!
The commotion has picked up in the hallway. Lover Boy isn’t alone out there anymore. If I’m not mistaken that last blow I heard wasn’t on the door, but connected with someone’s face. I risk a peek out the privacy hole and I see Zalken trying to restrain Dorn. He’s not having much luck because Dorn is much stronger than he is.
Zalken is joined by Rune and Aptar, and the three of them manage to subdue my crazy baby daddy. Dorn’s cursing gradually fades as they carry him kicking and screaming down the hall. Finally. Now that I’m alone maybe I can think.
I have to come to a decision soon, before we reach Krina. Too bad I have no idea what I want. I’m too young to be a mother, but there’s no denying the fact that this child is mine. I press a hand to my stomach and think about the baby growing inside of me. I’ve never felt so woefully inadequate in my entire life.
Bocc-d’ar
Chaos fills the castle. It was reported to me at mid-day that the prisoner, Endingo, somehow escaped his cell in the dungeon. This was discovered when the cook’s assistant went down to take him his meal. I was alerted immediately, and we launched a thorough search of the castle and the caverns.
So far no one has seen him, or uncovered any clues as to how he managed to get out of his cell. The cook’s assistant adamantly insists he put the key back on the hook after he delivered yesterday’s meal. There is no way that key could be reached from the cell. None of this makes any sense.
It is close to the dinner hour, and I decide to go retrieve TSSS so that she doesn’t work through mealtime. I tell my men they can eat in shifts, but to continue the search for Endingo. By this point I don’t hold much hope he will be recovered. I still don’t know how he did it, but he is obviously long gone. I’m sure he has slunk back to his people, the Hock-ver.
I climb the stairs to the tower, my loins quickening in anticipation of seeing her. I cannot seem to get enough of my beautiful mate. Even though I’ve been busy with the search for the escaped prisoner, it has calmed my mind to know she is safe behind
the hidden door with De-Var. When I reach the top I open the door but am surprised when I don’t see my TSSS inside.
“Good evening, Bocc-d’ar,” De-Var greets me, lifting his eyes briefly from his work, before continuing to apply ink to paper.
“Good evening, De-Var. I’ve come for TSSS. Where is she?”
“She has not come this day,” De-Var says without taking his hand from the page.
“What?” I rage, instantly upset.
De-Var reluctantly sets his pen down and meets my murderous gaze.
“Where is she?” I ask.
“I have no idea where she is. I have not seen her much lately. She started out as a very good apprentice, but seems to have lost interest. She has come less and less. Each day she comes later and later. Then today she did not come at all.”
“But if she has not been spending her days here, where has she been?”
“I certainly have no idea. I was not aware I had been awarded the job of nurse-maid,” De-Var mutters testily.
“De-Var, listen to me.”
The monk once again sets his pen down, sensing the urgency in my voice.
“Endingo has escaped the dungeons. We’ve been searching for him for hours, and have no idea how he managed to get out of the cell.”
“This can’t be a coincidence,” De-Var says, wiping his hands on a rag, and standing. “I’ll come with you. You’ll need to arm for battle.”
My blood chills as our eyes meet, both of us instantly realizing what has happened.
“Yes. Come. I need your mastery of the metallurgical to prepare for battle as quickly as possible.”
It all makes sense now. Endingo has my mate. She must have discovered the dungeons while wandering around the castle. The Hock-ver have their mysterious mind translators, so with the ability to talk to her, he has likely used his lying tongue to convince her to free him. I should have never left the dungeons unguarded. I’m a fool.
