by Lili Zander
“You sound like Ma Kaila. She didn’t like us making jokes in class either.” I fall silent for a long time. “I felt like a failure yesterday,” I whisper at last.
“Because you’re not ready to fight Marya? Kära, she has spent her entire life in combat arenas, underground wrestling rings, and gun ranges. She learned to fight in the pits of Idlib. You and I both know that a week of training isn’t enough to counter that.”
Saber lied to me once. Well, he strategically withheld information from me. He’s not doing it now. I might not like being told that I’m not good enough to compete with his ex, but he’s not going to pretend otherwise.
“I don’t feel like a failure because of Marya. It’s everything that happened afterward.” I can’t look at my vampires. I drop my gaze to my lap. “Every human in the courtyard yesterday was more useful than me,” I say, my voice low. “Marcus’ partner gave blood and saved Marcus’ life. I spoke to Antonio before he left. Do you know what he said to me? He said that exchanging blood was the ultimate sign of intimacy. That when Marcus drank from him, it not only made him feel needed and wanted, but it also deepened the bond between them.”
Saber sighs. “He said all that, did he?”
“Mm-hmm. He also said that the physical experience itself was an aphrodisiac.”
Nero rolls his eyes but doesn’t say anything to contradict me. My heart sinks. “I can never have that with the three of you. Dr. Karling dressed up in a containment suit today because one stray drop of my blood and he would have died in the most gruesome way.” I spread my hands. “I'm broken. I'm incomplete. I’m a toy that won’t wind or a drone that can’t fly. You should return me to the store and start over.”
Zeke raises an eyebrow. “Are you done feeling sorry for yourself?”
My mouth falls open. Whatever I thought he was going to say, it wasn’t this.
“Yes, vampires need to feed,” he continues. “But do you know who gives in to uncontrolled bloodlust? Animals. Do you think we are animals that can't control their baser urges?”
I just stare at him.
“Zeke’s right,” Saber says. “Do you think we’re here because your value is as a food source? There are billions of humans in the galaxy. If I wanted blood, any of them would suffice.”
“It’s an important part of who you are. Don’t try to deny it.”
“It is a part of who I am,” he agrees. “It is not an important part.”
Nero paces restlessly at the foot of my bed. “We talk about you,” he says. “We’ve discussed all your theories.” He lifts his hand and counts them off. “One: We’re not here to prevent you from killing every vampire you meet. That was your first theory, right? You said that to Zeke.”
My mouth falls open.
“We’re not here because the virus makes your blood irresistible,” Saber adds. “You don’t need the virus for that.”
“That was your second hypothesis.” Nero shakes his head. “What was the third?”
“Duty,” Zeke says. “We’re bravely sacrificing our lives and careers because Ottar Thistle screwed up.”
Nero’s teeth flash in a grin. “That’s very noble of me.” He climbs onto the mattress and kneels in front of me. “All those theories,” he says softly, taking my hands in his. “And you forgot the simplest explanation. We’re here with you because we want to be. Because we’re in love with you.”
Saber puts his hand on my thigh. I feel the weight of it all through my core. “Every human has blood,” he says quietly. “I love you for who you are. If I never drank from you, that wouldn't change the way I felt. I love your bravery, your grit, your kindness. Look at me. Do I look unhappy to you? The galaxy is falling apart, and I don't have the slightest desire to return to the fight. I am the happiest I've ever been in my life. Right here, right now. Because I'm with you.”
Zeke nods. “You are a part of us. We are a part of you. You’re not broken. You’re not incomplete. You are perfect.”
For two days after we left Boarus 4. I’d huddled in Ragnar's bedroom and felt sorry for myself. Right now, I can either wallow in my fear and in my misery, or I can get up and fight back.
They really love me. And I love them.
I sit up. I don't know what I've done to deserve the love of my three vampires, but I won’t take it for granted. I don't care how many times it takes for Dr. Karling to get it right. I will be his guinea pig. I will get as many transfusions as it takes.
A smile tugs my lips. Virus or not, I feel like the luckiest person in the empire. “I love you too.” I don’t whisper the words. I want to shout them from the walls of the hutong to everyone in the galaxy.
“Good.” Nero’s dimple flashes into view, and my heart beat starts to accelerate. I haven’t slept with all three of my three vampires together for a very long time. Not since Boarus 4. I held back because of the symbolism of the act. When we all made love, I wanted them to be able to drink from me.
I don’t want to wait.
The vampires’ nostrils flare as they smell my arousal. A slow smile stretches over Saber’s face. “It appears that there’s something we need to do.”
“There is?”
His glacier blue eyes bore into me. He shaved this morning, but stubble still darkens his strong jaw. “Yes,” he says. “Make love to you.”
24
Raven
On Boarus 4, when we slept together, it had been about sex. I’d been attracted to them. If I let myself forget that they were vampires, I even liked them.
But now, this? This is so much deeper. We’ve been through multiple battles. We’ve shared experiences. We’ve exposed the most private and hidden parts of ourselves to each other. I talked about Baird. Zeke told me about his family. Nero shared his grief that his mother has never really recovered from her time as a slave. Saber revealed how his family history has shaped him.
We’ve shared our weaknesses, our vulnerabilities, our fears. And it has only made us stronger. It’s made us come together as one. As a team. As a bô.
This time, it’s more than sex. It’s togetherness. It’s intimacy. It’s an expression of our love.
They undress me, layer by layer. They kiss me, tenderly, reverently. Soft music fills the room, the faint hum of the melody more imagined than heard. The lights dim to a golden glow.
“Lovely.” Zeke’s gaze sears into me. He cups my breasts in his hands and bends his head to suck my nipples between his teeth. Nero moves behind me and undoes my braids, one by one, tangling his fingers in my tresses. Nerve endings in my scalp prickle in response and I can’t hold back my whimper.
Saber reaches under the bed for a blindfold. My mouth falls open in surprise. “What else do you have there?”
“You’ll find out. Close your eyes.”
I do as he asks, and he blindfolds me, brushing a kiss against the back of my neck when he’s done. “Tonight is about you,” he murmurs into my ear. “Your body. Your orgasms. I want to hear you come over and over, kära. Don’t hold back. Sink into pleasure.”
They position me on the bed. I lie on my back, naked, blindfolded, spread out for them. I can’t see anything. All I can do is feel.
A pair of strong hands close over my wrists. The vampire—Zeke, I think?—lifts my hands to his face. My fingertips brush his skin, and I trail them down, touching his face, his neck, and his strong chest. I stroke his nipples and feel them harden, and a groan tears from his throat. Smiling in pleasure, I linger on the beautiful, taut muscles of his abdomen.
Outside this room, events move at the speed of light. At some point, we’ll need to figure out what happens next. I know this is only an interlude. I know this can’t last.
I intend to savor every moment.
Zeke positions my hands above my head. Nero holds them in place, holding me immobile.
A mouth covers mine. Judging by the rasp of stubble against my skin, it’s Saber. He kisses me, soft and slow and possessive. With the tip of his tongue, he traces the edge of my
outer lip, and then he pulls back. I groan in protest, and his chuckle reverberates against my skin. He kisses me again, playful and teasing, his tongue outlining my lower lip this time. “Do you like that, Raven?” he asks, squeezing my breasts and pinching my nipples. “Are you imagining me doing this to your cunt?”
Not until he asked. But I am now. I picture Saber sucking my labia into his mouth, and a shock-wave of arousal runs through me. I squirm restlessly on the bed and try to tug my hands free from Nero’s grasp. I want to touch my vampires.
“No.” Nero’s voice is implacable. “Let us pleasure you, Raven.”
“Turn around,” Zeke says, his tone deep and dark. “On your stomach.” I barely have time to wonder what they’re planning to do when a stream of warm oil trickles on my body. I bite back my moan. I’m aching for them, for their touch.
A large hand slides up my thigh, massaging the oil into my skin. Another hand strokes my back, and I arch into the touch, my nerve endings prickling with desire. They touch me everywhere. They massage my arms. My shoulders and my back. Their hands rub my thighs, grazing my pussy as they work, teasing me but never lingering. They move to my calves and my feet. For a few minutes, they work in silence, interspersed by my sighs of pleasure. My skin is slick with oil, and their talented hands simulate every muscle in my body. I’m still aroused, but I’m also gloriously relaxed.
“Are you falling asleep on us?” Saber sounds amused. He trickles oil down the crack of my ass. He spreads my cheeks, and I feel a blush creep up my face. “Let’s see if I can wake you up.”
His finger teases my tight hole, spreading the oil all over me. He presses down slowly, pushing into me. I bury my face in the pillows and luxuriate in the sensations battering me. My toes curl in pleasure as he adds another finger, slowly stretching me, preparing me for his cock.
A surge of need pulses through me. My muscles clench. I’m so turned on that I can’t think. I can’t focus. I can’t even breathe.
While Saber carefully eases his fingers in and out of my asshole, Nero moves to my side. “Lift up,” he says, his fingers caressing the side of my breasts.
I push myself up on my elbows, and his fingers find my nipples. He rolls the hard nubs between his thumb and forefinger, and I shift restlessly. Heat builds between my legs. “Please, I want your cocks…” Even as I utter the words, I know there’s no point. It’s about me, they’ve promised, and the one thing I’ve learned about my vampires? They keep their promises.
Zeke brushes my hair aside, and his warm lips tickle the skin at the back of my neck. “Turn around.”
I comply. He cups my breasts, bringing them together, and squeezes gently. His mouth finds my nipples, sucking them, nibbling at them. I’m so consumed with pleasure that I barely notice Nero spreading my legs. Saber resumes his attention on my ass, trickling more oil on his fingers and pushing them into my ass, twisting them around to stretch my muscles.
It’s been a while. I whimper in slight discomfort. “Want me to stop?” Saber asks.
“No.” I exhale slowly. I want all three of them. I want it to be overwhelming. Intense. “I’m fine.”
“Distract her, Nero.”
Nero chuckles. “Gladly.”
His beard scratches my delicate skin, and the sensation sends a sharp spike of heat through me. He moves between my legs, and parts my folds with his finger, brushing a thumb over my clitoris. Every nerve ending in my body comes alive. My pussy weeps with need.
“So beautiful,” Zeke whispers. His lips meet mine in a searing, intoxicating kiss. His tongue probes my mouth, exploring me thoroughly. I groan deep in my throat and kiss him back, almost mindless with need. My insides twist with desire. I reach for the blindfold, wanting to take it off. I want to feel the full intensity of Zeke’s hunger. I want to see the lust in his eyes.
To nobody’s surprise, he stops me. “Not yet,” he says, giving my nipples a hard pinch. “You need to come first.”
“Oh, I get to come today?” I snark. “That’s unexpected.”
He chuckles and pinches my nipples again, this time harder. “By the time we’re done, you’ll be begging us to stop, love.”
Love. My heart skips a beat. They love me.
Nero bends my knees up. “Very pretty,” he says. Then his tongue swipes over my slit, a light, teasing stroke that has me whimpering in restless need. He kisses my clit, the tip of his tongue circling my engorged bundle of nerves. He licks it and sucks on it, alternating hard and soft strokes, building tension and then backing off until my hips buck and I’m writhing in desperation. His tongue circles my clit, flicking from left to right, up and down. At the same time, his fingers massage my folds.
Sensation overwhelms me. Saber’s fingers stretching my ass, Nero’s mouth on my pussy. Zeke’s lips on my nipples. My head thrashes from side to side. I’m so close.
They rip off the blindfold. I blink as my eyes adjust, and I see Nero’s body loom over mine. “Are you ours, Raven?” he asks, his voice serious.
“Always.”
I can smell the clean male smell of him. His biceps bulge as he holds himself over me. His dimple is close enough that I finally do what I’ve been dreaming about for days. I lick that delicious indentation, and from the sound of his sharply drawn breath, I’ve surprised him. Good.
His green eyes glitter wickedly. “I’m going to fuck you until your sweet little pussy clenches around my cock. You ready for us, love?”
He slams into me, and all thought flees my brain. I cling on to him. My nails dig into his flesh. Saber’s cock nudges my tight back hole, and I welcome it. I take Zeke’s length in my mouth.
They take me to the edge, over and over. They make me come more times than I can count. In the same breath, they tell me they’re going to fuck me so hard that I won’t be able to walk tomorrow, and they tell me that I’m precious to them. They spank my ass and kiss my flesh, and they tell me they adore me. The words that fall from their lips are reverent, and they are profane, and it is perfect.
My blood is fatal to them. For the first time, that thought doesn’t send a stab of pain through me. They love me, and I love them, and we will figure this out. Together.
25
Zeke
I feel every bit of Raven’s anger, her frustration, and her sadness. If anything, it just spurs me on. Everything we’re going through—our dead teammates in Rothis, the virus in Raven’s blood, the five thousand casualties in Deina, the missing boarium—all of that is because of one man’s quest for absolute power.
Everywhere we turn, we hit a wall, but each failure just makes me more determined to push through. We’re close. I can feel it. Somewhere, there is a key to this puzzle, and I will find it.
No matter how long it takes, I will beat Harek Levitan.
Time passes. I eschew sleep to work. Tomas shakes his head disapprovingly. “You need to get some rest.”
“It can wait. There’s an answer here. What are we missing?”
“I don’t know.” Tomas’s voice vibrates with frustration. “We’ve re-created Levitan’s movements for the last ten years. We’ve even pieced together when he went to Boarus 4. We’ve uncovered Marya Revit’s travel logs. We’ve searched everywhere.” He exhales in a long sigh. “We’ve hit a dead end. I don’t know where to go from here.”
We’re too close to the problem. We need to take a step back. “What else do we know? The General isn’t stupid. After Rothis, he knew Saber was looking for answers. He knows I’m hacking into his records. He knows Ragnar’s tracking his movements.”
“Where are you going with this?”
Something niggles in the back of my mind. “How did you find out that Patrik Kevis and Gerra Clay were plotting together? They would have taken precautions to avoid detection.”
“They knew their comms were monitored,” Tomas confirms. “They wouldn’t have said anything where they could have been overheard. So we had to approach this from another angle. There was a four-hour interval when their comms
were switched off at the same time.”
That’s it. The missing key. Things click into place. It’s not the locations Levitan traveled to that we need to investigate. It’s the places he’s avoided.
“Bring up the Empire on the main screen.”
A two-dimensional map of the Shayde Empire flashes on the wall in front of us.
“Highlight every sector that the General has visited in the last ten years.”
Every sector lights up. Not a surprise. Harek Levitan sits on the Ruling Council of the Empire. He is the Regent to the Empress. Though he prefers to stay in Starra, travel is part of his job.
Tomas leans forward. “You’re joking. Could it really that simple?”
“Let’s find out.” Levitan wasn’t always obsessed with power. At the start, when he’d been appointed Regent, he’d had enough authority to keep him sated. It’s only in the last few years, as it’s become apparent that Astrid isn’t content to remain a figurehead, has he been searching for a way to cling onto power.
“Narrow the time frame. Highlight every sector Levitan’s visited in the last five years.”
One by one, the sectors light up. All except one.
The Chipwa Sector, home of both Patrik Kevis and Gerra Clay, stays stubbornly dark.
Shock jolts through me.
“Well, I’ll be damned.” Tomas’ voice is awed. “Of course it’s the Chipwa Sector. It’s the thinnest spot in our spy network. Ragnar has done his best to respect the peace pact between the two families. Levitan would have known it’s the last place we’d look.” He stops talking. “Unless they’re working together?”
“I can’t see it.” I stare at the map, my mind working through the problem. “Levitan’s not looking to share power with anyone. Besides, he loathes Gerra Clay. He thinks she's reckless and impulsive and undisciplined. If he had his way, she'd be dead. He might have even tried a couple of subtle assassination attempts, but Clay knows how to take care of herself. No, he’s using the two councilors as a shield.”
