“Mom, we’re here!” Connor called out in the foyer, jarring her out of her inappropriate thoughts, thank God. As it was, her face was a little warm and no doubt her cheeks were pink.
At the first sound of unfamiliar voices, Val clamped on to Katie’s leg, all her original excitement and bravado now reverting to shyness and uncertainty—just as she’d been with Connor that first day he’d met her. Four new faces came out to greet them, all friendly and welcoming and pleased to meet Katie as Connor introduced his parents, then his very pregnant sister, Natalie, and brother-in-law, Wes.
Allison, Connor’s mother, bent a little lower to smile at Val, who had her face half-buried in Katie’s skirts, clearly overwhelmed by everyone. “You sure are a pretty little girl. And who is that that you brought with you?” she asked of the unicorn plushy clutched in one of Val’s arms.
“Sparkles,” Val said softly, tentatively.
“Well, I was just frosting a cake in the kitchen for dessert. Do you think you and Sparkles would like to help?”
That definitely piqued Val’s attention and won her over. Katie felt her daughter loosen her hold on her dress, and then she looked up at Connor with those matching blue eyes, as if silently looking to him for his approval.
He held his hand out to her. “Come on, princess. Let’s go help your grandma frost a cake. I bet she’ll even let you lick the spoon when you’re done.”
“Easy on the sugar, please,” Katie said humorously, because the last thing she wanted was Val bouncing off the walls on their first visit.
Everybody headed toward the kitchen, and Katie glanced at Connor’s sister, Natalie, to make conversation about her pregnancy, but she was startled by the tears she saw in the other woman’s eyes. “Are you okay?” Katie asked, unsure what had caused the bout of emotion.
“I’m sorry,” Natalie said, her expression sentimental. “I seem to be crying over everything lately. It’s probably pregnancy hormones, but oh, my God, she is so beautiful and I can’t believe I have a niece.”
Katie smiled, already liking Natalie. “Thank you. Connor says she looks a lot like you when you were a little girl.”
“I see Connor in her, too,” Natalie said, blinking away the excess moisture in her eyes. “And you, as well.”
As Connor had said, Val was a great combination of both of them. “I brought pictures so you can see her in different stages since she was born.”
Natalie placed a hand on her baby bump. “I can’t wait to see them.”
They were the last two to enter the kitchen, and Val was already kneeling on a stool with a butter knife in her hand, ready to smear frosting on the cake that was on the counter. Connor was right beside her, prepared to intervene if needed, but Allison was telling Val to have fun and giving the little girl carte blanche, and Val was already putting big dollops of chocolate frosting on the cake.
“Do we get to eat it?” Val asked hopefully.
“After you have your dinner,” Connor said, totally in dad mode.
“Okay.”
Allison smiled at Katie. “Connor said you brought Val’s photo album?”
She heard the excitement in the older woman’s voice, and Katie nodded and lifted the book she’d carried in the crook of her arm. “Yes.”
“Let’s sit down at the table,” Allison suggested, waving a hand toward the large dining set in the adjoining room. “I’m sure Connor can handle the cake frosting, and we have some time before I send the boys out to barbeque the chicken for dinner, and a hot dog for Val,” she added.
“You didn’t have to make her anything special.”
“I wouldn’t expect a three-year-old to eat grilled chicken, scalloped potatoes, and broccoli casserole,” Allison said with a laugh. “I can still remember how picky Natalie and Connor were at that age. Would you like something to drink? Sweet tea or a glass of wine?”
“A sweet tea would be lovely,” Katie said.
“Me, too, mom,” Natalie added.
“You got it. Don’t start without me.”
When Allison was gone, Natalie leaned back in the chair next to Katie, regarding her with kind but curious eyes before she spoke. “I know we just met, but I have to say that I don’t think I’ve ever seen Connor this happy. I mean, he’s always been an easygoing guy, but seeing him now, when he talks about Val, you can see he’s a totally different person.”
Katie absently traced her finger along the edge of the photo album on the table, allowing herself to open up to Connor’s sister. “I honestly didn’t know what to expect when I contacted him, considering Val was a complete surprise. A lot of guys might not have been happy having a kid they knew nothing about, but he’s been so great with her. I couldn’t have asked for a better dad for Val.”
“Connor is definitely a stand-up kind of guy.” Natalie rubbed the top of her belly, as if soothing the baby inside. “But I can assure you, the time he spends with Val isn’t out of obligation or a sense of responsibility. It’s because she’s changed his life, and his future, and Connor is an all-in kind of guy. He’ll always be there for her.”
“I know,” Katie said, not doubting his commitment when it came to Val.
Natalie smiled at her. “And just for the record, he talks very fondly of you, too.”
“That’s sweet,” she murmured, not about to get into a serious conversation about her relationship, such as it was, with Connor.
“Here you girls go,” Allison said, returning with two glasses of sweet tea. She set them on the table, then sat down so that Katie was the one in the middle of the two women.
They spent the next hour going through the pictures, with Katie giving them a commentary of each one, while Allison and Natalie asked questions about Val’s birth and the years and milestones leading up to her third birthday. By the time they were done, she felt the beginnings of a friendship with both women.
In fact, Connor’s entire family was gracious and accepting, and by the time they were finished with dinner—which had been full of interesting and amusing facts about Connor’s childhood thanks to his father—it felt like she was part of the family. Except . . . she wasn’t. She reminded herself that she was there as a default, because she was Val’s mom, and while the Prescotts had done nothing to make her feel excluded, a part of her felt as though she was on the outside looking in, and she knew better than to get too attached to something that she’d never had in the first place.
After their meal, and Val’s frosted cake for dessert, everyone gathered in the living room for a little bit, the conversation still flowing . . . until Natalie let out a startled gasp.
“Everything okay, Nat?” Wes, her husband, asked, concern etched all over his expression.
“I’m fine,” she assured him. “The little guy in my belly sure does have a strong kick and it took me off guard,” she said with a laugh. “He’s been really active the past few days.”
Val, who’d been playing on the floor with her unicorn, jumped up and went to Natalie, her curious gaze taking in her big baby bump. “There’s a baby in there?” she asked guilelessly.
“Yes.” Natalie smiled. “Do you want to feel him kick?”
Val nodded eagerly, and Natalie took her hand and placed it on the side of her stomach. “Be patient and wait. He’s a little stubborn sometimes, like his daddy.”
Everyone in the room laughed and gave Wes a hard time, clearly agreeing with Natalie’s assessment, while Val remained completely still, her palm pressed to Natalie’s belly.
Then, she let out a tiny squeal of surprise and delight. “I felt it!”
Another round of laughter ensued, everybody enjoying Val’s innocent and excited reaction.
“When is it coming out?” she asked, blinking up at Natalie.
“Hopefully very soon.”
Val gently rubbed where the baby had kicked as she patiently waited for more movement. “Can I play with it when it’s out?”
“Not right away because he’ll be too little,” Natalie said. �
�But when he gets older, I hope you two play together a lot because he’ll be your cousin.”
“Oh.” Val’s expression was sweet and naïve, because she wasn’t old enough yet to understand what having a cousin meant.
But she would soon enough, because going forward, visits with these good-hearted people would be her new normal. Grandparents, an aunt and an uncle, and cousins—all the things that Katie had never known. Val would be here for holidays and get-togethers, and she’d be a part of a family who wanted her. She’d know security and stability and she’d be loved unconditionally, and for that Katie was grateful.
* * *
With Val asleep in her car seat because it was past her bedtime and Katie staring quietly out the passenger window as Connor drove back to her place, he was all too aware that something was up with the woman sitting next to him.
He’d kept an eye on her during the course of the evening as she’d interacted with his family, to make sure that she was comfortable at all times. She’d hit it off with his sister and his mother, and even his dad had taken a liking to Katie. They’d all talked easily, there had been no awkward moments, and he’d thought she’d enjoyed herself, but now he wasn’t so sure because her current body language told a different story.
Whatever was on her mind, he didn’t want to discuss in the car, only to get cut off when they arrived home. So, instead he turned up the volume on the radio a few notches to fill the silence, so hopefully she’d relax. A little while later, he parked her car in the driveway and turned to her.
“If you’ll go open the front door, I’ll carry Val in and put her to bed,” he told Katie. No sense waking the child and having a cranky kid on their hands.
“Okay,” she said, and after getting out of the vehicle, she headed up the walkway.
It didn’t take him long to get Val out of her car seat, and as soon as he had her in his arms, she cuddled against his chest so sweetly, so trustingly. Ahhh, if only her mother would let down her walls so easily. Connor was trying to be patient with Katie, to give her time to open up to him and come around to something more than this current arrangement they had, which was part-time co-parenting for him and sex for them. Great sex, but still, the fact that he had to leave her bed before Val woke up in the morning told him that she clearly wasn’t ready to have him in all aspects of her life. And that’s what he ultimately wanted with her . . . because he not only loved Val but he knew without a doubt he loved Katie, as well.
The emotion didn’t surprise him. After three and a half years of constantly thinking about her and their one night together, he’d known the moment he’d seen her again a couple of weeks ago that he still had incredibly strong feelings for her. Seeing what an amazing mother she was to their daughter, and getting to know Katie as a person with all her strengths and heartbreaking vulnerabilities, he knew he wanted to be that person for her, the one she could always depend on to be there for her, for the good, the bad, and everything in between.
For him, Katie and Val were a package deal, and building a life with them was what he saw as his future. That’s just the kind of guy he was. Casual relationships had never been his thing, and he didn’t do things halfway. He wouldn’t start now.
He carried Val into the house and to her bedroom. Katie helped get her undressed and into her nightgown, and with Sparkles hugged tight to her chest, Val fell right back into a deep sleep again.
“I’ll be in the kitchen making a cup of hot tea,” Katie said in a soft voice while Connor finished tucking in Val. “Would you like anything?”
He shook his head. “No, I’m good. I’ll be there in a sec.”
Katie left the room, and Connor watched his daughter for a few extra seconds while brushing his fingers along her soft, chubby cheek. She was absolutely perfect, an angel who made him want to be a better man for her, and the best dad possible. From the moment he’d found out about her, she’d changed his life, and for the better.
In his eyes, there was a reason Val was conceived when the odds had been so highly stacked against the possibility. She was meant to be, and her existence had brought her mother back to him, giving them the second chance they both deserved.
Convincing Katie of that was proving to be much more difficult.
With a sigh, he left Val’s room and closed the door behind him. He found Katie in the kitchen, swirling a tea bag in a steaming mug of hot water. She had to have heard him enter the room, yet she didn’t turn around, keeping as silent and brooding as she’d been on the way home. He got the impression that she wanted to be alone, but unless she blatantly told him to leave, he wasn’t going anywhere. Not until he knew what had put her in this funk in the first place. They’d made headway over the past couple of weeks, but it felt like whatever had set her off today had pushed them two giant steps back, instead of forward like he’d hoped.
“You were awfully quiet on the drive home,” he said, leaning against the counter across from where she was standing to give her space. “I hope you had a nice time?”
“I did. Your family is wonderful,” she said as she squeezed the excess moisture from her tea bag into her mug. “It makes me realize how dysfunctional mine always was.”
Ahhh, now they were getting somewhere. This was the one area she’d always been vague about. He knew her parents were divorced, that she was an only child, and she wasn’t close to either parent now. What he didn’t know was how that family dynamic had affected her, personally, as a kid. He had a feeling that a lot of her insecurities stemmed from that time in her life.
“I’d really like to hear about what happened with yours,” he said, keeping his voice neutral.
Stirring honey into her tea, she gave her head a hard shake as she glanced over her shoulder at him. “Trust me, you really don’t.”
The corner of his mouth hitched up in a smile. “Trust me, Katie, I really do want to know, or I wouldn’t have asked.”
Setting her spoon in the sink, she picked up her mug and turned around, leaning against the counter across from where he stood. She seemed to consider whether or not to go down this route before she finally spoke. “In a nutshell, my childhood, and what I had of a family, was the complete opposite of yours. My mother got pregnant, and my father married her out of obligation, not love, so no big surprise that they got divorced.”
He heard the pain and resentment in her voice, and while his first instinct was to get rid of the distance between them so he could comfort her, he remained right where he was. He knew there was a lot more to her story, so he waited while she took a sip of her tea, then continued.
“So, I was four at the time they split up, and it was nasty. Even at that young age, I remember lots of fighting and arguments and each of them doing and saying things to hurt the other, and quite honestly, in all my eighteen years of being raised by them, that never stopped.” She paused for a moment and wrapped her hands around her coffee mug, and he didn’t miss the hurt, even so many years later, that filtered through her dark brown eyes. “There were constant custody battles with me in the middle, and when I was a bit older, I realized that even though my parents went to court to fight over me, it wasn’t because they wanted me. I was a pawn between them, used as leverage to hold something over the other person. And it didn’t matter how good I was or how I desperately tried to please either of them, it didn’t make a difference. It wasn’t about me, it was about them and what they wanted. I was just a casualty of their failed marriage.”
He swore beneath his breath and crossed his arms over his chest, wishing he could erase those horrible memories from her mind. But he couldn’t. Those emotional scars clearly colored how she viewed their arrangement with Val, and why she was so cautious and guarded. Especially since both Katie and her mother had gotten pregnant unexpectedly. He didn’t have to be a rocket scientist to realize that Katie kept her heart under wraps because she didn’t want to risk their daughter getting caught up in a similar custody situation. And it didn’t help matters that the last guy she’d b
een in a relationship with had totally fucked her over.
“So, yeah, my family situation has always been pretty screwed up . . . but I’m really glad that Val will have grandparents who will love her. At least your side of the family will never make her feel like she’s not wanted.”
Her voice was so thick with emotion, and he couldn’t stay away from her any longer. Pushing away from the counter, he crossed the kitchen to her, then took her mug from her hands and put it on the surface behind her. Then he gently pulled her against him, embracing her, silently comforting her. He couldn’t change her past or her childhood, but he could show her that things could be different. That he was different—from her father and all the men that came after him.
But for now, he just wanted her to feel cared for and loved . . . even though he knew she wasn’t ready to hear those words from him. Verbally, he held them back, but he’d show her how much she meant to him in other ways.
“Put your arms around me, sweetheart,” he said when she hadn’t fully relaxed against him and was relieved when she did as he requested. “I want you to know what it feels like to hold on to me, to know that I’m here for you, that you matter to me and I would never deliberately hurt you.” She just needed to believe it.
After a while, he released her and took her hand in his. “Come on, I’m going to put you to bed,” he said with a gentle smile, no sexual overtures involved, because that’s not what she needed tonight.
He led her back to her bedroom and made her put on her comfy tank top and pajama shorts while he stripped down to his briefs. After turning off the light, he got beneath the covers with her and pulled her close, spooning against her backside. He’d only snuggle with her for a little while, because he knew that him staying the night still wasn’t an option for Katie.
When he slid his hand around her waist, she grabbed his arm and pulled it tight around her, silently needing him—even if she wasn’t ready to say the words.
The Book Boyfriend Series Box Set Page 64
