“What for?”
I took in the swaths of white wrappings that covered his body. There was more bandage than skin. “Everything.”
“Dude. You can’t think this is your fault.”
It was so like him to try and make me feel better when it was him in this shit situation.
“But Cam, it is.” My hands gripped around themselves so tightly the knuckles turned white. “I fucked up. I should never have let you into the car.”
“You’re not my fuckin’ nanny, Gabe. No one stops me from doing anything.”
“If I hadn’t modded the engine in the first place you wouldn’t have—”
“You think I don’t know my way around a car? Gabe, I know how to handle a mod. This isn’t on you, okay?” Cam‘s jaw tightened again. “I took my eyes off the road to check on a text alert, and that was all it took.”
My brows drew together. “Cam.”
“Yeah.” Cam exhaled slowly, and it was clear that even that simple action caused him agony. “It was just for a second, y’know? I must have done it before a thousand times. It was the Head Chef, the hotel was running low on wagyu beef or some shit. I just glanced down at my phone for a second. One second. When I looked up, there was a divider right in front of me and I couldn’t stop.”
I couldn’t find the right words to say. “Jesus, Cam.”
“It’s so stupid now, but I did what I did. I’m just glad no one else got hurt. I wouldn’t know how to live with myself if that happened.”
Cam eased his head slightly to he faced me. The bandages covering his face looked harsh and unforgiving against his bruised skin.
“So I get what you’re feeling, okay? I do. And I need you to get that it isn’t your fault. I’ll be out soon anyway, so spare me the pity party. You know I hate that shit.”
“How bad is it?” Lancaster Senior had glared at me with such loathing the last time I was here that I was certain that Cam’s injuries had to be fatal. “What’d the doctor say?”
“Same old, that I’m lucky to be alive and all that. They’re giving me a seventy-five percent chance of recovering my sight in both eyes. Ninety for at least one.”
I didn’t like that they weren’t a hundred percent.
“Those are good chances, right?” I asked hopefully.
“Yeah they are,” Cam said, sounding a little more relieved. “And I’ll take ‘em, y’know? So stop fucking moping already, everything’s fine.”
“I’m gonna do everything I can to increase those chances. Anything short of a guarantee isn’t gonna let me sleep at night.”
“Same here. I will get my sight back, you hear me? So just carry on as usual.”
“How can I?” I said incredulously. His request was impossible.
“Gabe, I’m only gonna say this once. You’re more my brother than any of my own brothers ever were. So don’t beat yourself up about this. It’s the last thing I want. I’ll be back on my feet with you guys in three months, four, tops. If you really wanna make it up to me—not that you have anything to make up for—you’ll handle my shit at Skyline Cap. I’ll have enough on my plate with the hotel and with therapy.”
I stared at my best friend, wishing more than anything that I could take his place in that hospital bed. But I couldn’t, and so the only thing I could do was not let him down.
“I’ll do it,” I said quietly. “I’ll do it so fucking well you won’t have a spot waiting for you once you’re back.”
Cam’s lips parted in a grin. “You’re good, Easton. But you’re not that good.”
His hand reached out blindly, and I clasped it in mine, taking comfort from the fact that his grip was as strong as ever.
“I’m glad you’re gonna be okay,” I breathed, grateful that Cam couldn’t see the tears in my eyes. He’d never let me live it down. “If down the line you need a kidney or something, just say the word.”
“I don’t want your lousy kidney.”
“I’m serious. I’d do anything to make this right.”
Cam exhaled, settling back in the bed like he was satisfied with something. “For what it’s worth, you’re doing a lot more of that these days, starting with backing Lena up. Looks like your breakaway from Jemima helped.”
“Mostly it’s Lena.”
“Figures. She’s too good for you.”
My mouth curved. “I know. That’s why I’m not letting her go.”
“Good, ‘cause I might just swoop in if you fuck up.” Cam’s breathing evened as he started to fall back into sleep. “You got this, yeah?”
“Yeah,” I said quietly. “We both do.”
“Word,” Cam murmured as he drifted off. “We’re gonna be fine, Easton. We’re gonna be just fuckin’ fine.”
I waited anxiously for Gabriel to return, pacing his living room over and over as I tried not to watch the clock. He left for the hospital a few hours ago and it was already turning dark.
God, I hoped it was going well. I chewed my knuckle restlessly and abandoned the living room for the patio instead. It was the size of my entire apartment, with enough space for a small garden and gazebo area, but I was too worried to appreciate it.
My work would have to wait. I exhaled and rested my forearms on the cool glass railings, trying to distract myself by looking out at the city.
Warm arms suddenly came around my body in a tight hug.
“Hey stranger,” Gabriel murmured.
My heart quickened. “Hey.”
He buried his face into my shoulder. “What were you thinking about?”
“You.”
“What about me?”
I settled back into the warm sanctuary of his arms. “How you wanted to leave this behind to find yourself,” I said, looking out at the darkening city. “Did you?”
“Find myself?” Gabriel nuzzled the side of my neck. “Finding oneself isn't a destination though, is it? It's a process. That’s what you showed me.”
My mouth curved. “You sound like an enlightened monk.”
He pressed his pelvis against me, letting me feel the hardness against my back.
“Do I feel like one to you?” he said mildly.
“Focus,” I protested without much conviction. “How did it go with Cam?”
“As well as I could’ve hoped.” His shoulders relaxed a little. “Cam will likely be fine, thank god.”
Relief washed over me, not only for Cam but for Gabriel too. I knew he‘d never forgive himself if the outcome was anything other than this.
“Gabriel, that’s wonderful.”
He nodded against my neck.
“Thanks for dealing with my shit the past couple weeks,” he murmured, “even when I was being a pathetic douchebag.”
“You’re not pathetic, you were living a nightmare. Anyone would have reacted the same way if their best friend had been hurt.”
Gabriel’s arms tightened. “What did I do to deserve you?”
I wanted to ask him the same thing. To me, Gabriel was the safety I always wanted but never dared ask for. He was acceptance, and he was home.
I turned to face him, my fingers twisting into his t-shirt of their own accord like they were holding on to a buoy in a storm. His hands cupped my face firmly, holding me still for him as he kissed me in deep, searching strokes.
My eyes slid shut in pure bliss as I gave into what he asked from me.
This was actually happening, I thought dimly. I was on a balcony overlooking the most beautiful city in the world, kissing the man I was in love with. His mouth was on mine, his hips trapping me against the glass railing. I could feel the proof of how badly he wanted me pressing insistently against my stomach.
My legs began to go weak as Gabriel kissed me, and I wound my arms around his neck to hold on to him. His hands slid down to my waist, and suddenly, the kiss took a turn from rom-com territory straight into M18 lane. I didn’t know who started it, but our bodies began grinding against each other—slowly at first, then urgently.
I moaned s
oftly against Gabriel’s mouth as his hands grabbed my hips and pulled me closer into him. His erection pressed against my belly, hard into soft.
“Gabriel,” I whispered. “I want you.”
Without breaking our kiss, Gabriel hoisted me against his chest and walked us back into his bedroom. My arms and legs were still wrapped around him when he reached the bed, and we fell back into the mattress in a tangle of limbs and low moans.
Gabriel pinned me down with his body, pressing his erection between my thighs, right against where I was aching for him.
“Yes,” I breathed, arching my back and trying to get closer to him. I had missed this part of him so much I nearly wept from the joy of having him back.
He groaned softly. “Lena… Angel.” He thrust against me, making my eyes go heavy-lidded in pleasure. “What the hell are you doing to me?”
I wanted to ask him that too. My body seemed to pulse with electricity everywhere he touched me. I felt too hot, and my clothes and bra felt too tight. I wanted them all off. In that moment I needed nothing more than to feel my naked skin against Gabriel’s.
As if he could read my mind, Gabriel started to hike up my sweater dress, watching me with hungry eyes as he did. I tried and failed to keep my mouth from curving.
“Hurry up.” I urged him on with a flex of my hips.
Gabriel gave a low laugh, but he didn’t tease me like he usually did. He was too focused on revealing my body, inch by inch, until finally he took my dress off completely.
“Jesus,” he murmured huskily, staring down at my body in a daze. “You’re so damned lovely.”
I was naked except for my underwear, and I instinctively moved to cover myself. Gabriel caught me before I could, gently but firmly easing my arms away. He ran his hands down my body, taking his time, leisurely squeezing the curves of my waist and hips like he couldn’t help himself. He took my breasts in his hands, playing with them until I was in a state of languid pleasure.
Then he lowered his head to take my nipple into his mouth.
I gasped as my body arched off the bed to push deeper into his mouth. My hands flew to his head to hold him there, tangling into his heavy locks of hair as he pleasured me.
Gabriel’s brows drew together as he suckled me, and his hand went unerringly between my thighs. His fingers eased the damp fabric of my underwear aside, massaging my aching core the way I needed it until I was wet and soaking.
“Gabriel,” I choked as my desire mounted higher and higher, threatening to overwhelm me. “I need more.”
“Like this?” his low voice murmured against my breast. His fingertip stroked me in a slick, firm glide.
My head fell back. “Yes,” I breathed as my legs opened wider for him. “Gabriel, more…”
“You’re so wet for me.” Gabriel released my nipple to gaze down at me, his deep coffee eyes bright like a panther’s as his fingers kept playing with me. “So fucking tight.” His eyes grew heavy-lidded as he watched me.
“I want you to lose control,” he murmured. “I want you to scream for me.” He slipped his finger over my clit.
“Oh god,” I whispered, my hips thrusting upwards. “Oh god, Gabriel…”
“I want to hear that sweet voice of yours go hoarse when I fuck you.” Then he slid my underwear off my hips, baring my swollen and aching core to him.
“Yes,” I breathed as cool air touched my body everywhere. Gabriel’s gaze was hot in contrast, running all over me and missing nothing.
“Take off your clothes,” I said throatily.
Gabriel smiled, and a ragged moan rose in my throat as he made quick work of his t-shirt and jeans.
I could never get enough of how beautiful he was. His broad, smooth chest rose and fell with exertion, and his arms were strong and roped with lean muscle. All I could think about was how safe they made me feel. The whole world seemed to fall away when I was in those arms.
Gabriel watched me closely as he leaned his body over me, settling between my thighs.
Feeling bold, I took him in both my hands, and they didn’t even cover the length of him. Gabriel groaned and thrust into my hands, and that was all the encouragement I needed. I slid my hands to the base of his cock, then brought them back up.
“Fuck.” Gabriel held himself still over me, his arm muscles bunching on either side of my face with the effort to hold still. “That’s it, babe.”
I kept working him, pumping my hands clumsily at first but as I got used to it, I got into a stronger rhythm. Gabriel groaned, thrusting into my hands until he decided that was all he could take.
With a low growl in his throat, he brushed my hands aside. I heard the rip of a condom wrapper, then he took the back of my knees and pushed them to my chest.
He wasted no time entering me, and I bit my lip as his thickness parted my slick, sensitive flesh, going so deep that he filled every inch of space inside me.
My eyes slid shut and I let my arms fall back above my head. I was trusting him with my body and my heart, and Gabriel knew it. One of his hands held my hip firmly, and the other went to play with my nipple, flicking and rolling the bud, and then he took it into his mouth again, drawing deep.
“Oh my god,” I breathed, arching my back in pleasure.
Gabriel’s body heat seemed to envelop every inch of me. He was thrusting so deep within me that I could feel him in my womb, filling me up completely. Every steady stroke from him agitated my clitoris, and the nerves in my body felt like they were under assault. I never wanted him to stop.
“Keep going,” I pleaded. My vision was already winking from the pleasure, and my legs were trembling around his waist.
Gabriel laughed softly as he thrust again and again into me, working my body steadily.
“Keep talking, babe,” he murmured. “You’re so turned on your voice shows it.”
I barely registered what he was saying, but Gabriel was right. My voice has gone husky and low with desire, and the more pleasure he built, the more moans came from my throat.
It was the first time I was so open with wanting my pleasure, and it felt…freeing.
“Yes.” My eyes were half-shut in bliss from what Gabriel was doing to my body. “Gabriel, yes, just like that…”
“I could listen to the sounds you make for days,” he said with a wicked smile.
And I could make love to him for days.
Gabriel unhooked my knees from around his waist and pushed them against my chest, making me hug them as he went even deeper and harder. Faster. Gabriel built the rhythm until he was practically pounding into me and I loved it.
“Yes, right there— oh god…” My eyes rolled back and soon I felt my climax building, stronger than any I’ve ever had with him before. “Gabriel, I can’t hold it—”
Gabriel’s hands grasped my hips hard as he thrust without giving me respite. Every muscle in his body was tense, and the strong lines on his shoulders were slick with sweat.
“I can feel your pussy squeezing me,” he said, his voice ragged with lust. “You’re so damned wet for me.”
“Yes.” I sank my nails into his shoulders in a helpless plea. ”Don’t stop, please don’t stop—”
The bed was rocking with his hard thrusts as we moved. It was raw and sexual, and soon my eyes began to roll back and my insides clenched around his thick shaft, eager to come around him.
“Gabriel,” I breathed. “Gabriel, I’m coming…”
Gabriel clenched his teeth and slammed home one last time inside me, stretching and filling me to the brim as my body spasmed around him tightly.
“Oh yes—” My entire body arched as I clutched his hips hard enough to draw blood. “Yesss!”
The veins in Gabriel’s arms stood out starkly out as he ground himself in me for my orgasm. His jaw was tight with effort, and his skin was flushed an even darker tan.
I clung on to him, moaning helplessly as I came around his erection. He was so big inside me, so hard, and my inner muscles gripped him greedily as I orgas
med.
As my peak crashed over me, Gabriel’s resolve finally broke. He gripped my thighs hard, groaning low as he thrust his hips again and again.
“Lena,” he groaned as he emptied himself inside me, shuddering with pleasure. The raw and primal sight of him coming made me breathless with desire all over again.
When we were both sated, I fell back into the bed panting like I’d just run a mile. Gabriel tossed the condom and did the same. Our chests rose and fell as we tried to catch our breaths.
I blindly reached for Gabriel’s hand, hungry for the contact with him, and Gabriel met me halfway in the space between us.
He had reached for me too.
I laughed softly as I tried to turn to him. My body was so sluggish from the pleasure that all I could manage was a tilt of my head.
“Thanks,” I said softly. “It was amazing.”
Gabriel grinned at me, looking just as worn out—but happy.
“You are.” His hand squeezed mine. “You’ve ruined me for anyone else, Mouse,” he said, his tone serious and tender.
“Not only that,” I teased, “seeing how I almost ruined your life with my article.”
“I’m always down with letting a beautiful girl ruin me.” Gabriel turned to me fully, watching me with those dark irises that I could spend forever in.
“Everything’s different when I’m with you,” he said. My breath caught as he brought his forehead to mine.
“I’m in love with you, you know,” Gabriel admitted quietly. “I know you’ve got a lot to deal with right now—hell, you had to drag me out of a slump just yesterday. But I can’t hold it in anymore, Lena. I’m in love with you. Every inch of your shy, quiet, brave and reckless self. And I don’t think I’ll ever stop loving you.”
Gabriel drew back slightly, his dark gaze searching mine as I stared back at him. My lips eloquently parted and closed as I tried to think of the right words to say to him.
“You don’t have to say it back yet.” A teasing grin played on his lips. “I'm just gonna love you anyway. Who knows, maybe one day you’ll feel the same when you’re ready—”
I kissed him hard, shushing his next words, and when I drew back, his eyes were bright and fierce with love for me.
Charming (New York Heirs #3) Page 23
