I could feel them walking toward the door before I heard it open. Their intent oozed ahead of them by at least fifty feet. I sighed and pretended to focus on the map.
"What's a pretty little thing like you doing in a place like this?"
"Reading a map," I replied without looking over my shoulder.
"Where you heading, sugar?"
Great. Now they're both hitting on me.
I chose not to respond. They must have figured it would help their case if they touched me. One of them put his hand on my shoulder, trying to get me to turn around. I folded up the map and set it on the counter in front of me, not wanting to get blood on it.
I turned and rolled my eyes. "Guys. It's been a long night. I'm not interested. In fact, I'm a lesbian," I lied.
"That's okay. We won't mind watching you and your pretty friend."
"Okay. I'm not actually gay. I just said that so you would leave me alone. But I'm still not interested."
"We just want to buy you a drink." The one missing a front tooth reached up and caressed my cheek with the back of his hand. I wasn't afraid. Being immortal gave you a certain boost to your confidence levels, even more than tequila. But I didn't want to retch on his shoes as he disgusted me on every level.
"Nice roofie cocktail, I'm sure."
His eyes narrowed. He grew enough balls to reach back his hand and swing at my face.
"Ná bogadh," I whispered. His hand froze, inches from my face.
His friend, who had been laughing and cheering, looked at his friend, confusedly. "Aren't you gonna teach her some respect?"
Ten thousand things could have come out of his mouth that would have pissed me off less. Maybe twenty. "Respect?"
"Yeah. We just wanted to buy you a drink. Then you had to get all feminist on us."
Maybe fifty.
"Me not wanting to go off and have a drink with two guys makes me disrespectful?"
"Yes. We're just trying to be nice and you're being bitchy."
My blood began to boil. I decided to return the favor…
"Bheith ar dóiteáin," I said and let more than a bit of power flow into the words.
He screamed and backed away, clutching his head. I could see his blood boiling in his veins. Bubbles ran up his arms as he cooked from the inside out. His face began to smoke as his hair singed, filling the room with an acrid odor. The fire alarm went off and the sprinkler system above us kicked on, dousing all of us in water.
"What did you do to him?" His buddy was freaking out, still unable to move. I released the spell.
I expected him to try and help him or even attack me. Instead he ran out of the building. I looked at the half-charred corpse on the ground by my feet. "Nice friend you have there."
Josie came running out of the women's restroom. She took one look at the scene, grabbed my hand and pulled me out the door. My water-soaked clothes became very uncomfortable in the wind.
"Tirim agus te." The water evaporated in a puff of mist, my clothes taking on a pulled from the dryer feeling.
"You can't do stuff like that, Dot. We're not in Ashville anymore. People out in the real world don't believe in witches. What do you think they're going to say when they find that body?"
"Spontaneous human combustion?"
"Hmm. Maybe. Anyway, get in the car. Let's go."
I hopped in the passenger seat and buckled up. "If you see a blue pickup, wake me up."
"Why?"
"No reason," I said and tilted the seat back, letting Josie take over.
Chapter 2
I sat up straight in my seat. "Get off the highway!"
"What? Why?" She jerked the wheel and hit the exit ramp at sixty. Stomping on the brakes, she fought for control and slowed without slamming us into the guardrail. She had to have used a tad bit of magic. I should have known better than to be sleeping, missing all the warnings and warmings we were approaching the destination.
"This is it?"
"You sure?"
"Yeah. Where the hell are we?"
"I have no idea. I didn't have a chance to read the sign. I was too busy peeing myself."
I thought she was joking until she said, "Calidum et siccum." It was the same spell I'd used, but Josie used Latin for her canting.
"Ew. Dry the seat, too!"
"It's leather." I could tell by her face she was beyond mortified, so I let it go. We'd been best friends forever. I'd seen worse.
I grabbed my phone to look at the GPS. The actual GPS, not my magic one. I kind of wanted to know where we were. I scrolled the map up to see what we had passed, and Syracuse came into view. "How long was I asleep?"
"A couple of hours."
"Huh. Well, this is the right way." We looped back under the highway and headed west. "We're really close. You're going to see a small town on the right side of whatever the hell road we are on. You're going to comment on how cute it is. That's the one. Get off this road and then head toward the center of town."
"Okaaay. How the hell do you know all that? I mean I understand magic, but this is kind of creepy."
"Trust me. I can see it in my head."
"Always."
"Awww. Thanks, Josie."
We drove. I was almost sad that the itch hadn't kept us in the mountains. It had vanished while I'd been sleeping. The landscape was still dotted with hills, but nothing spectacular. An hour passed before I knew it. We crested a hill and a town came into view.
"Oh, that's cute–" Josie sighed and slowed down.
"You were planning on saying anything in the world but that, weren't you?"
"I was going to say it was ugly. Something wouldn't let me."
I laughed and scooted forward in my seat a little, anxious to see our new home. Josie turned right as soon as she could, and we were off the county road.
"Main Street." I read the street sign as we turned. "How quaint."
"And unoriginal."
"Shush. Don't make fun of our new home."
"Looks smaller than Ashville. We could move to Syracuse and commute…"
"Yeah. Cuz we'd do so well in a city."
"You don't know that."
"I know you would blow up a bus the first time it missed our stop."
"Okay, maybe, but I was looking forward to a little excitement."
"Be careful what you wish for, Josephine."
She shuddered in her seat. "You hungry?" She sounded excited at the prospect of food.
"Hell yeah. Find a diner. You can always judge a town by their diner."
"Cedar Falls Diner. I guess we're in Cedar Falls?"
"That's pretty. Wonder if there's any houses for sale."
"Kinda jumping the gun, aren't you?"
"No. This is the place."
"You're sure?" She didn't sound convinced.
"I'm sure, I'm sure."
"You're the boss."
"Since when?"
She gave me a sidelong glance. "Really? Since forever. Your mother is High Priestess, you're destined to be High Priestess."
"In like four-hundred-years…"
"I'm not talking about home. I'm talking here. It might be a coven of two, but you know I'm yours."
"Damn it, Josie. You're gonna make my mascara run."
"Oh, shut it. You know you magicked that shit on."
"Tramp."
"Ho."
We both started giggling as she pulled my Kia into the parking lot of the diner. We parked, walked to the front door, and stepped back in time forty-years or so.
The motif of the diner seemed to be teal. That was it. Teal and stainless steel. It ranged from the teal and white checkered linoleum tiles, to the teal and white acoustic ceiling tiles. The front of the counter was teal. The register teal. All the condiment holders…you guessed it. Teal.
"Oh, dear Lady," Josie whispered next to me.
"My eyes…"
We giggled and waited for the waitress. She, and her teal outfit, came out from the kitchen carrying two plates of eggs, toast, and
cholesterol. It smelled delicious.
"Have a seat wherever, hons," she yelled across the diner.
I gestured to the booth closest to the door. Josie sat facing the diner. I sat facing the pristinely clean glass windows. I was almost giddy. I could people watch while I ate.
Mortals fascinated me on so many different levels. I don't mean like pets. More of a, let's see how much life we can jam into a century, aspect. Some handled it well and were happy. Some were so miserable they did everything they could to make the people around them just as miserable. The former piqued my interest more than the latter. I usually just liked to fuck with them.
Hell hath no fury like a bored witch.
"Coffee?"
I looked up at the waitress who had silently descended on our table. "Please. And a Coke."
"For you?" She turned her attention on Josie and handed us both a couple of menus.
"Tea."
"Kay. Be right back."
"Twenty bucks says her name is Flo."
"Hell no. You probably saw her nametag or something," I said without looking at her, focusing my attention on the more important things. Breakfast.
"Why do you even bother looking at the menu. You know you're going to have a cheese omelet and pancakes."
"I was thinking of trying something different."
"Sure," she replied disbelievingly.
Two minutes later, Flo set our drinks on the table and whipped out her ordering pad. Complete with carbon copies. "What can I get for you, ladies?"
"I'll have a cheese omelet. And chocolate chip pancakes."
"Rebel," Josie muttered from across the table.
"What you having, sweetie?"
"Steak and eggs, medium-raw, over easy, white toast, and hash-browns."
"Herb, diet plate extra moo, and a kid's meal with kid's eggs," she yelled at the large man behind the griddle. I hadn't noticed him until she had said his name. He was dressed in teal. Cedar Falls Diner Camouflage.
"How the hell is all that a diet plate?" I asked incredulously.
"Well they did have a larger one called the belly buster on the menu."
"I kind of want to order it to see what they call it."
"Ask her."
"You ask her."
Our conversation was interrupted by the bell over the door. I looked up from Josie and my mouth almost hit the Formica table-top. He wore blue jeans and had blue eyes. The rest was just icing on the cake.
"Wow. I think I'm going to like it here."
Josie checked out his posterior as he passed our booth. She looked up at me and mouthed, "Holy shit."
We giggled like a couple of school girls. He turned and looked at us over his shoulder and gave us a little wink. I melted. My heart first, but then lower…
I shifted uncomfortably in the seat. Thankfully Flo brought out our food. "Here you go, ladies," she said and sat everything down in front of us. She even managed to carry the jar of syrup and the ketchup. Flo was efficient. "Can I get you anything else?"
"That guys number?"
She looked behind her at blue jeans at the counter. "That's easy. Its 9-1-1."
"Huh?"
"That's the chief of police."
My heart sank. He was probably married and had twelve kids. Women scooped up cops like chocolate ice cream, then divorced them a decade later. It's hard to squeeze twelve kids out in ten years, but if I were married to him, I'd sure as hell try.
"I know what you're thinking, bumpkin, but leave that one alone. He's hurt. Lost his wife two years ago."
"Oh, wow. He's young."
"She was younger."
"Poor guy," Josie chimed in.
"Let me get his order together. I'll be back to check on you in a few."
"Thanks," I said, almost calling her Flo.
I picked at my breakfast, almost too depressed to eat. I'd really chewed on my Converse with that one. Luckily, I hadn't stepped in any dog shit.
"You want to go over there and give him a hug, don't you?"
"Yeah."
"Let it go. You don't need to go breaking hearts in the town we're moving to."
I nodded, knowing she was right. Sighing, I dumped half the bottle of syrup on my pancakes. It hadn't been my intention. The stuff came out quicker than I was expecting.
"Smooth," Josie teased.
"Not my fault. The stuff is like water."
She reached over and dipped her finger in it, bringing it to her lips. "Oh, my Lady. It's real."
"Real what?"
"Maple syrup. There isn't an ounce of corn syrup in it."
"Huh." I said and took a bite. Heaven spread across my tongue and warmed my very soul. "Woah."
"Yeah. Okay. Its official. We can move here now."
"Yep. It's been twenty years since I've used anything but the fake stuff. I forgot what the real shit tasted like."
"Your mom doesn't buy it?"
"Mom hasn't cooked in twenty years."
"Probably safer that way."
"Yeah." I shuddered.
Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Flo hand blue jeans a plastic bag. He took it and tried to give her some money, but she just kept shaking her head. He sighed and headed toward us, the door actually, but we were sitting by it…
"Have a good day, ladies."
"Thanks, Sherriff," I replied coolly.
"Chief."
"I was close."
"Kinda. You just passing through?" He stopped by the door.
"Thinking of relocating. How's the housing market?"
"Crashed. Buyer's market, though. Mind if I ask why?"
"Seems like a quaint little town. I was thinking of opening a shop or something and settling down."
"The two of you? Together?"
"Just friends," I answered automatically. It wasn't the first time Josie and I had been asked.
He let go of the door and moved closer to our table. He smelled good. His aftershave wafted over me. He smelled like pine trees and manliness.
"If I might make a suggestion?"
I nodded.
"Move closer to Syracuse. Cedar Falls is a town most people move away from. Like as soon as they possibly can."
"Maybe it just needs some new blood."
"It's up to you. Don't come complaining to me when you get bored," he said with a light chuckle.
"Is there a bowling alley?"
"No."
"Movie theater?"
"Shut down."
"Jeez. Guess we'll just have to figure out something."
"Good luck! Enjoy your stay. I give you six months…" He winked and headed back toward the door.
"We're going to set this town on fire," I whispered to Josie.
"They won't know what hit them."
"Can I get you guys anything else?" Flo shuffled up on our conversation.
"We're good for now. Unless you know a good real estate agent?"
"Herb, you have a couple of customers."
"Herb the cook is the real estate agent?"
"And the coroner. Small town."
"How small?"
"Too small," she said and set our check on the table.
Chapter 3
"Hardwood floors, fireplace, three bedrooms, two baths. Garage is in the rear of the house at the end of the drive. The kitchen needs some TLC. I can recommend a good handy man, though."
I looked around the living room. The house might have actually been older than me. It didn't show its age nearly as well. I was afraid to walk across the floor. "That's okay. We're pretty handy."
"You buying together?"
"No. I'm paying."
"You might have a little difficulty getting a mortgage. House is old, in foreclosure, and property values are abysmally low."
I looked up at Herb. He was very soft spoken. I found it almost soothing. "Paying cash."
"You have fifty thousand dollars in the bank?" He seemed a little shocked.
"Yep. I'll take it." The itch seemed happy with my decision.
"It's your loss."
"If you think so little of it, why show it to me?" I was curious.
"Cheapest house in the area, even with the crap market values, but it has the most potential. If you fix it up and the market ever swings the other direction, you might actually make your money back."
"Are you looking out for me, Herb?"
He nodded and blushed.
"Thank you!" I gave him a quick hug. "Let's talk commercial properties now. I'm thinking about opening a bookstore and coffee shop. Have anything in mind?"
He stared at me in shock. "In Cedar Falls?"
"Yep. I hate commuting to work."
"Dorothea…"
"Dot, please. I hate that name."
"Do yourself a favor. Don't waste your money. You dump everything into a business, it's just going to fail in this town. The kids are more interested in smoking weed than reading a book. The married people are obsessed with moving to Syracuse. The older people are obsessed with moving to Florida. A book store coffee shop just won't make it…"
"You still looking out for me, Herb?"
"Yes!"
"Thank you. But, don't worry. Even if it takes twenty years to finally turn a profit, I have enough of a nest egg to survive. I'm doing this because I want to."
He sighed, defeatedly. But then he began to think about it. "I might know a place. County property that didn't sell in the last auction… I might be able to get a bid into the council. Let them vote on it. You might even get it cheaper than this place."
"That would be awesome! I'll eat at your diner three meals a day if it's close enough."
"It's actually a couple of buildings down from the diner. Used to be the fire house until it…caught on fire. They built a new one closer to the center of town. It's the newest building in Cedar Falls and it's almost twenty years old."
"How bad was the fire damage?"
"Nothing structural. Some damage to the walls and floors, but nothing that can't be fixed. They built a new firehouse because the old one wouldn't hold a tall enough truck."
"Cool. Can we take a look at it?"
"Sure. Follow me."
We exited the house and I caressed the front door. I whispered I'd be back to make it happy. I could almost hear the house sigh. What most mortals didn't realize is that the more that inanimate objects were bombarded with emotion, the more animated they became. Humans just couldn't hear or see it. The ones that could usually ended up in padded rooms.
First Moon : A Reverse Harem Tale (Lovin' the Coven Book 1) Page 2
