by Laura Scott
“My parents believe really strongly in the value of hard work,” Noelle said. “They instilled in me a strong sense of responsibility and dedication to my job. They always tell me not to come home for the holidays, or summer, because those are the best times of year to get overtime. They’re great people, but they don’t have that relaxed sense of joy that your folks do.”
Adam stopped in front of a squat brick walk-up. She did too. He frowned.
“I asked my parents to stay home with Matty tonight instead of coming to the final giveaway,” he said. “With everything that’s happened, it just felt safest. Matty tried to be brave, but I could tell he was really disappointed.”
It was definitely the smart move to make considering there’d been an incident right outside the last event. Still, as she watched Adam’s shoulders droop, she could feel her own heart sink.
“For what it’s worth, I think you made the right call,” she said. “But I’m sure that doesn’t make disappointing Matty any easier. I’m not working tonight, but Liberty and I can be there as friends if you need backup.”
She stepped toward him and the space between them shrank as her free hand brushed his shoulder. Liberty’s head butted her knee and the dog whined softly, as if she sensed the people were sad and wished she could help.
“Thank you,” Adam said. “It would honestly be great to have you there.”
He shifted slightly and her hand slid off his shoulder. But instead of stepping back, he moved closer and his fingers brushed hers, linking their hands for one long moment. Then he pulled away and turned toward an apartment building. He shifted the bag higher on his shoulder.
“Come on,” he said. “I’ve got some presents to drop off.”
She followed him up the steps, saw him hesitate at the broken keypad and then push the door open. They stepped into the building and immediately Liberty tensed slightly. Noelle looked around but saw nothing but a door to the left that read Employees Only and a bank of key-scarred mailboxes to her right. Whoever had been carrying drugs through here earlier was now gone. She ran her hand over the back of Liberty’s neck, just behind her black-smudged ear, to reassure the dog.
She followed Adam up the stairs. “I completely neglected to ask where we’re going.”
Oddly enough, she’d been so happy and relaxed just enjoying Adam’s company somehow the question had completely skipped her mind.
“We’re here to drop some gifts off for Olly Whit’s daughter and her mom, Lonnie,” Adam said. “They’re unlikely to have much, especially with him in jail over the holidays, and I wanted to make sure they were taken care of.”
Something swelled in Noelle’s chest and she found herself thanking God for this incredible man with such a deeply caring heart.
They reached the third floor and walked down a hallway that smelled of cooked meat, marinara sauce and the sickly sweetness of whatever had been last tossed down the garbage chute. Adam knocked on a door with what looked liked a child-made pompom Christmas wreath on it. The woman who opened the door was thin and looked barely more than twenty, with long blond hair streaked with blue. A little girl peeked out from behind the multi-colored couch behind her. Noelle glanced down at Liberty. The dog’s body was relaxed and her tail was wagging. It seemed she didn’t detect anything from Lonnie or her apartment, and Noelle thanked God for that.
Lonnie glanced from Adam to Noelle and Liberty, but when Adam reassured her that Noelle was just there as his friend, she relaxed slightly. Lonnie smiled as Adam handed her the bag of gifts for her and her daughter, and when Adam encouraged her to come to the next free community meal, she said she’d try to make it.
“It would be great to see you both there,” Adam said. “And if you ever want to talk to anyone about Olly or anything else, I’m here. You can trust Noelle too.”
Lonnie’s lower lip quivered.
“Olly’s a good man,” Lonnie said. “He just makes bad decisions. But he’s not a bad person.”
“I know,” Adam said. “I think most people are good at heart, but some make bad choices and some are also given a bad deal in life. People are complicated.” Lonnie nodded. Adam’s smile was kind and warm. “Merry Christmas! Hope to see you again soon.”
They left and walked back down the hall and they started down the stairs.
“I hope you don’t mind I didn’t try to ask her any questions or invite myself in,” Adam started.
“No, judging by how tense she was when you first showed up, my guess is she wouldn’t have been comfortable with that,” she said. “It’s really important not to scare off potential witnesses, especially as I’m off duty and someone else will have interviewed her.” Their footsteps reached the second floor. “Honestly, I was just thinking how really, really nice it was of you to do that. But why did you invite me along?”
“Because I know that even if she does know something, she won’t sell out Olly to the police,” Adam said. “My impression has always been that Olly knows he’s too toxic for his wife, but also doesn’t want his daughter growing up with her father in jail. But I thought if I vouched for you personally, and introduced you as a friend, she might be more willing to trust you if she did know something.”
They kept walking down the stairs and Noelle found herself praying for Lonnie and her daughter, and everyone else whose lives had been touched by drug smuggling. She prayed for the officers fanned out across the city trying to solve the case, and finally for the incredible man now walking beside her and his family.
Please, Lord, bring this case to a close soon, before anyone else gets hurt.
The sound of gunfire shook the air, echoing up from the floor beneath them. It was like someone was firing wildly up the center of the stairwell toward them.
As fast as her instincts were, Adam’s were even faster.
“Get down!” Adam’s voice thundered in her ear as he threw his arms around her, pulled both her and Liberty down into the corner of the stairwell and sheltered them with his body, as bullets ricocheted around them.
FIVE
Adam felt his arms tighten around Noelle and her head tucked into the crook of his neck, as they crouched together on the floor. His heart pounded in his chest. Prayers poured through him. Then the sound of gunfire stopped, silence fell and they pulled away from each other. For a moment their faces were so close that if one of them had flinched even a little their lips would’ve met in a kiss. Instead, she jumped up and ran down the stairs, calling for backup on her radio, Liberty by her side.
He rocked back on his heels and gasped a breath, as the realization of what had just happened swept over him. His instinct had been to protect her. He hadn’t thought about himself or keeping himself safe from danger, just like he hadn’t when he’d chased after her through the alley.
No, when he’d heard the sound of gunfire, all he’d wanted to do was keep Noelle safe. The need to protect her had been overwhelming, then relief had engulfed him when he’d realized she was okay, followed by an odd sort of loss when she’d run down the stairs without him.
Help me, Lord. It’s like everything I feel when I’m around this woman is so much louder and stronger than regular feelings that it’s deafening.
He gasped another breath, pushed to his feet and ran down the stairs to the lobby. He couldn’t have been more than a few flights of stairs behind her and yet it was like arriving into an entirely new world. Two young men in blue jeans and hoodies stood talking with a gray-haired man, who seemed to be the building manager. Within moments two cops had run through the door, who he guessed must’ve been patrolling the area nearby, followed shortly afterward by more police in a flurry of sirens.
And there was Noelle in the middle of it all, managing the scene, calming the witnesses and briefing the officers as they arrived. Even off duty, there was something commanding about her. Adam stayed for a while, long enough to give a statement to one off
icer and double check that Lonnie and her daughter were okay. But once again, Noelle was so caught up in talking to the police, making calls and just being her incredible, professional and impressive self, that he found himself hovering on the edges of the scene for a while, watching her and wrestling with his own confusing heart.
He told her that he was heading home unless she needed him to stick around to give her a ride. She thanked him but said she’d be fine. Then he walked back to his vehicle alone and drove home, feeling his thoughts chase after him like buzzing drones that had locked onto something deep inside him. Noelle didn’t need him. He wasn’t her colleague, they weren’t serving in the same unit and he definitely wasn’t her bodyguard. Sure, she was investigating a case that had to do with his family’s charity, but that was where their relationship ended.
So, why did he feel so happy and complete when he was near her? And like something crucial was missing when she wasn’t there? Why did it feel like she’d leaped into his heart and taken it over, just like she’d tried to commandeer his truck the day before? Had he gotten bored with his civilian life? Had he gotten too complacent about reteaching himself the skills he’d lost when he’d been injured? Did he miss the adrenaline rush of risking his life to save others?
Guide me, Lord. I’m all questions and no answers. Help me be who You’ve made me to be.
One of the most important reminders of who God had made Adam to be was waiting for him in the window when he got home. He waved to Matty, then got out and jogged toward the house.
“Hey, Matty!” Adam called as he opened the door. “The snow’s really soft and squishy right now. Want to come help me build a snowman?”
“Yes!” Matty yelped, running so quickly to throw his coat and boots on, he almost slipped in excitement. A smile filled Matty’s face and lifted Adam’s heart.
Thank you, Lord, for all You’ve given me.
The next couple of hours passed quickly and happily, as he and Matty packed and rolled snowballs together and sang Christmas carols at the top of their lungs. What had started as one snowman grew into an entire snow family, with a snow dad, snow son and two snow grandparents, by the time he heard footsteps crunch the snow behind them. He turned to see Noelle and Liberty standing in the driveway. Noelle was back in civilian clothes, dressed in blue jeans, boots and a bright red coat that matched the giant bow on Liberty’s collar.
She waved hello. “Hey, guys! Those are some good-looking snowmen.”
“Hey,” Adam said, his mouth feeling oddly dry.
“Hi, Noelle!” Matty chirped. He bounced on the balls of his feet like he wanted to run toward them but was waiting for permission. “Liberty’s off duty, right?”
Noelle laughed. It was a beautiful sound. “Yes, Liberty’s off duty. We both are.”
She leaned down and whispered something in Liberty’s ear, then she dropped the leash and the dog practically galloped across the snow toward Matty, stopping just short of barreling into the boy. Matty threw his arms around Liberty and the dog’s tail thumped in the snow.
Adam met Noelle halfway up the driveway and their hands hovered in the air for a moment as if they both wanted to hug but weren’t sure if they should. They ended up shaking hands, awkwardly, then crossing their arms and turning toward Matty and Liberty as the boy and dog tussled in the snow.
“The suspect was apprehended three blocks from the shooting,” Noelle said. “He was eighteen and says his drug dealer gave him the gun and told him he’d give him a thousand dollars to follow me and shoot. I was the target. Not you or Lonnie.”
As glad as he was to hear that Lonnie and her daughter hadn’t been targeted, knowing that Noelle had been in danger didn’t make him feel any better.
“He panicked and just shot up the stairs, hoping he’d hit something,” she went on with a shrug. “He was just a kid. Police picked up his dealer too, who says word on the street is that some new big player on the drug scene has got some really potent MDMA pills to sell and they’re shopping them around to various dealers. Rumor was that a deal was taking place at the community center. Seems he spotted me at the center, heard I’d intercepted the drop and figured scaring me off the case might give them an edge with the new player.”
Adam felt a chill spread down his spine. And was surprised when she just sighed.
“Of course, Olly is sticking by his story of just grabbing the wrong toy,” Noelle added.
“Tell me someone is looking into this new player angle,” Adam said. Not that he doubted for a moment someone would be, but more like he needed the reassurance of hearing her say it.
“A whole team of people are on it,” Noelle said. “Some of the best cops I know are questioning every single person involved and digging into each of their stories. This is a sprawling investigation. As far as we can tell, it was a crime of opportunity by one dealer hoping to earn cred with this new player in the drug game, and not a larger threat against me. Thankfully, Lonnie and her child are fine. A colleague got them a place in a really nice women’s shelter. It’s like a bed-and-breakfast with lots of other kids.”
“And we don’t have any idea why this new player would use my gift-giving event as a cover to do business,” Adam said.
“That’s what everyone’s trying very hard to find out,” Noelle said. “Do you recognize these men?”
She held up her phone and showed him pictures of both the teenager who’d fired the gun and his dealer, which he guessed had been taken around the time they’d been questioned. Adam didn’t recognize either of them. Noelle didn’t seem surprised, especially if she was right that they were low-level dealers who just happened to see her at the community center.
“So, what do we do now?” he asked.
“We go to your event,” Noelle said, “we give out toys and we’re thankful there’s a large police presence there. I was thinking we could go together and take your vehicle, since mine’s a police SUV.”
“Sounds good.”
They headed into the house, taking Liberty and Matty with them, luring the latter with hot chocolate and cookies.
“Come on, Liberty,” Matty called, as he stepped through the door and shook off his boots. “You can help pick up the crumbs!”
Irene ushered Noelle toward the inviting warmth and smells of fresh baked goodies in the kitchen. Adam walked to his large bedroom at the end of the hallway. He’d of course offered his parents the expansive master bedroom when they’d first bought the house, but Fred and Irene had chosen a large room in the finished basement with an en suite bathroom. He changed into fresh clothes, a Christmas sweater and perched his silly hat with the jangly bells on his head.
Then he sat on the edge of his bed and prayed. He wished he could talk to Carissa. She’d always been the steady rock he could rely on to center him when he felt tossed in the storm. He knew what she’d say. She’d say the exact same thing he’d written to her in the letter he’d left her to read if he died overseas on the battlefield. He’d written he didn’t want her to be alone forever, but to find a husband who was worthy of her love and who’d be a good daddy to Matty. But how was he supposed to know how he felt? His love for Carissa had grown slowly and gently for years. Whatever it was he felt for Noelle had completely broadsided him.
He followed the sound of chatter and laughter back to the kitchen. It seemed Matty had given Noelle his silly hat for the night and she was trying to figure out how to fit it on her head.
“Adam!” His mother’s voice rose as she turned to him. “Tell Noelle that she’s coming for dinner either Christmas Eve or Christmas itself.”
Noelle laughed and turned to Adam. “As I already told your mother, I’m working.”
“Both Christmas morning and Christmas night?” Irene said. “Who does that? Work one and come here for food the other.”
Irene crossed her arms as if the matter was settled. But as Noelle laughed again,
she didn’t seem the slightest bit cowed, let alone persuaded. And he wasn’t about to get in between the two strongest women he knew. He chuckled, popped one cookie in his mouth and palmed three more for the road. There was a smattering of goodbyes, hugs and final pats for Liberty. Irene pushed a napkin full of even more cookies into Noelle’s hands. Then a few minutes later, they were in his truck, heading to the final giveaway event.
“Thank you for sharing your family with me,” Noelle said, as he drove through the snowy streets. “They’re really wonderful.”
“I hope my mom wasn’t too pushy,” Adam said. “She’s always been rounding up people and inviting them over, for Christmas, Easter and the Fourth of July. My friends used to call her Mrs. Jolly Holiday.”
Noelle didn’t answer for a long moment and he wondered if he’d said something wrong. Liberty leaned forward from the back seat and stuck her head between the seats. Noelle scratched it thoughtfully.
“My parents are amazing, but they’ve never really liked Christmas,” Noelle said. “My dad has never been good at emotions. He was really focused on being a good provider and making sure my mom and I never went without, so he tended to take all the overtime he could. Dad was the only son in a big family and money was tight growing up. My mom has always been twitchy and uncomfortable about the holidays. She never talks about her childhood, but I know it was rough and I always got the impression Christmas brought up bad memories. They always made sure I had presents and a tree. But I could tell they were doing it to make me happy.”
She drew her arm back and rested it on the center console. Liberty leaned forward and set her snout on it.
“Christmas is hard for a lot of people,” Adam said. “Some are on a tight budget or work in essential services and can’t take a day off. Some are bereaved, or their family lives far away. The pressure the media puts on the holiday doesn’t help.”
