After we dress for the day Amara tugs me through the halls of the palace until we reach Kara Volterra’s chambers. Kara isn’t here, but one of the nurses is, taking care of Kara’s twins in her absence. She cradles Elian in her arms while his sister Alina fusses in her bassinet.
“Your Highness,” the nurse gasps, startled. She bows awkwardly in the presence of her princess. “I didn’t know you were stopping by today.”
“Unscheduled. And please, Sera, no bowing.” Amara begs. She has a hard time with all the customs that come with being a royal, but bowing and titles and gestures of respect are hardwired into these people. There’s no getting around it.
“Of course, Your Highness. I’m sorry.”
“Amara, what are we doing here?” I ask as she scoops Alina up into her arms. Alina immediately settles in the arms of her godmother, cooing happily. She looks right in Amara’s arms. She’s going to make an incredible mother one day.
“Well, I know you’re struggling, Haven. I know the idea of someone touching you scares you so I figured I’d bring you to the one person besides me you could touch, without fear of being hurt.” Her eyes flick to mine, offering Alina up to me.
I smile, stubborn tears pooling in my eyes. I’ve cried so much since escaping Vakrov, but for the first time since the day I saw Aaric and my brothers again these are tears of joy. I walk over and allow Amara to place Alina in my arms. I haven’t held either of them. When everyone gushed and swooned over Kara Volterra’s adoring twins I stayed in the shadows, afraid that if I laughed or smiled I’d forget for a moment what has been done to me. But holding the tiny Zodiac girl in my arms doesn’t bring on the terrifying, memory-inducing burn like everyone else’s touch does. Instead it calms me.
With one arm tucked around the newborn, I press my free hand to her belly. Her tiny hand unconsciously grasps onto mine. She squeezes tight, blue eyes on me. She has the same newborn blue eyes every baby has, but something tells me they’ll match Kara’s beautiful forest green eyes one day soon. She’s got her golden hair. Not much of it, but enough.
“If she starts to fuss just bounce her gently. It’ll calm her.” Amara tells me.
She leaves with the nurse, allowing me some time with the baby. I settle into a chair near the balcony. The doors are wide open, letting some of the cool winter air in. I brush the back of my finger along Alina’s baby soft cheek. The sensation grounds me.
Amara is the only person I’ve been able to touch without feeling like my skin is on fire or seeing all the ways Bastian Beaugrand misused me. Because she saved me, but also because I saw what she did to Bastian in those hallways. For centuries people have feared what her touch could do, what nether could do to them, but I have seen Amara Boudelaire wield her magic. I have seen what she is capable of and I don’t fear it like all the others. She makes me feel safe, more than my brothers or father ever could. It’s why I trust her. It’s why I’ll stand behind her through the war to come.
Without warning, the baby starts to cry. Her tiny body trembles in my arms, as if she senses something I can’t. I stand, bouncing her gently in my arms like Amara told me, but she doesn’t settle. “What is it, babygirl? What’s wrong?”
“Perhaps she senses what’s coming.”
My grip on the baby tightens at the sound of that voice. The hairs on the back of my neck stand up and the goosebumps return. I swallow around the lump in my throat. When I speak my voice shakes. “Bastian?”
My eyes fly to the balcony doors where he stands, hands shoved in the pockets of his pants, his lean figure braced against the archway. He smiles, sending a nervous chill down my spine. “Hey there, gorgeous. Miss me?”
Savage Reign Page 57
