Sean slowed his pace a trifle, so that he fell back in the group, and Nimby and Chlorine caught up to him. Now if she would just walk in front of him—but maybe that would come. He had caught enough glimpses of her bosom and thighs to keep him floating for some time; she evidently wasn’t used to the fancy clothing she wore now, and didn’t realize quite how much it tended to show. He sure wasn’t going to tell her!
Tweeter cheeped faintly in his ear. “Eyes left.” At least that was what it almost sounded like. Startled, he looked left—and Chlorine was moving close to him.
“Those are nice pets,” she said, her voice dulcet. “Was Tweeter speaking to you?”
“Yeah. He told me something lovely was coming up on my left.”
She smiled. “Thank you, Tweeter. I think you’re lovely too.”
The bird did a little dance of ecstasy, fluffing his feathers.
“Sean, you’re the first young man I’ve met, since Nimby made me beautiful,” she said. “I think I am practicing on you, to see how loveliness works. I hope you don’t mind.”
“I—you—you practice all you want,” Sean said, startled by her candor. How he wished he could get her alone and do some real practicing!
“You see, all my life men have scorned me, because I was plain,” she continued. “So I really don’t know how to act around them. I can’t practice on Nimby, because he’s not really a man. Please let me know if I bother you.”
“I don’t think you could bother me if you tried,” he said, feeling light-headed.
She laughed. “I could in my normal state. But I had Nimby make me nice as well as beautiful, and smart. But intelligence doesn’t substitute for experience.”
“That’s for sure.” The possibilities were setting his pulses pounding. She wanted romantic experience.
But now they had arrived somewhere. Just when it had been getting really interesting. Too bad.
They entered what seemed like an ordinary building. “This is where we prepare the raw stones,” Ortant said. “Atient here is a very fast worker.” Sure enough, the imp man was working with blinding speed, doing things to a collection of pebbles on his table. The gems were of several colors, and seemed to glow, or actually to be burning. “These are safe fire stones, used for making fires that will not get out of control.”
“Sapphires,” Mom murmured. She had a good eye for gems.
“What are these?” Chlorine asked, indicating several red gems that looked like little letter L’s and were rapidly spinning.
“Spinels,” Ortant said. “They are valued for their flashing color.”
They left the building and passed a mound covered with gravestones. An imp was using a scoop to pull shining bits of stone from it. “This is a die mound,” Ortant said. “It is not safe to walk on it unless you wish to die. Then you never leave it.”
“Diamonds are forever,” Dad remarked.
“Fortunately Robable is able to harvest stones from it without getting caught,” Ortant said.
“Improbable,” Sean muttered, catching on.
They passed a garden with yellowish rods growing from the ground. An imp was rubbing them, collecting something in a bag. “Goldenrods,” Ortant explained. “Ractical is harvesting their pollen, which we use to powder other jewelry with golden glitter.”
They passed a glade where many bees were buzzing. Several of them buzzed the party threateningly, but didn’t actually sting. Midrange batted at those that approached Sean, and Tweeter flapped his wings with annoyance. “What’s the matter with them?” Mom asked, irritated. “Why are they so pointlessly hostile?”
“They are rude bees,” Ortant explained. “Ede will stop them.” And an imp walked out toward the bees, his very presence seeming to hold them back.
“Imp Ede rude bees—impede rubies,” Sean murmured.
“You’re so clever,” Chlorine said, batting an eyelash. She was improving with practice; he felt foolishly flattered.
They came to a pool where another imp was working with a bucket shaped like an O. “Rovise is using the O-pail to try to dip out the matriarch of pearls.”
“Opal—mother-of-pearl,” Sean said. Chlorine batted another lash. He felt twice as clever as he was.
Then they came to a pen in the water where several fish-tailed equines were confined. One neighed. “Oh—sea horses!” Chlorine exclaimed, thrilled.
“In a corral—coral,” Sean said, working it out.
“Ose is doing his best to tame the horses in time,” Ortant said.
“In time for what?” Dad asked.
“In time to save them from the magic storm that is approaching. Our wares are very sensitive to changes in ambient magic; something we might not notice could cause them to go wrong. We need to clear the entire village by tomorrow night. That is why we are working so hard tonight; we need to complete our work and get our things to safety.” He frowned. “Unfortunately these horses are ill at ease now, and not cooperating well.”
Chlorine touched the water with one finger. “No wonder—this water is germy.”
“Yes, the storm is polluting it with weird forms of life. But there’s nothing we can do.”
“I can fix it,” she said. She touched the water again.
“But aren’t you poisoning it?” Sean asked anxiously.
“Yes. But not so much it will hurt the horses. It will just wipe out the germs. Then my poison will fade, and leave it pure for a while.”
Sean did a double take. “Of course—chlorine—the chemical—we use that in Mundania! To clear our water.”
Ortant was surprised. “You poison your water to clear it? I thought there was no magic in Mundania.”
Sean laughed. “It does seem crazy, but it works.”
The horses already seemed to be doing better. “We thank you,” Ortant said to Chlorine. “We never thought of purifying the water by poisoning it.”
They moved on, and Ortant showed them other aspects of the imp operation.
“But—” Mom said, troubled. “But shouldn’t you and your daughter be helping in this effort, instead of—of tending to us?”
“But you are guests,” Ortant said. “We must see to your comfort.”
Mom did not seem quite satisfied, but she said no more.
Ortant brought them to a burning portal. “This is the gate of fire through which we must take our wares to safety,” he said. “Ressed will show us the vaults.”
“Fire agate,” Sean murmured. “Impressed.”
“I’m impressed,” Chlorine murmured. “You are just so, so clever!” She was beautiful anyway, but by this time she would have looked lovely regardless of her appearance.
“So are you,” he replied.
“Oh!” she said, caught by surprise by his return compliment. Then she smiled. “It works both ways, doesn’t it?”
“Yes. That’s what courtship is all about,” he said, feeling very wise.
“Jim …” Mom said with quiet urgency.
“Perhaps we have seen enough,” Dad said, picking up on Mom’s mood. “We should get a good night’s sleep.”
“Certainly, if you wish,” Ortant said. “I shall lead you back forthwith.”
Sean knew that they didn’t want to take more of the imp’s time, when it was clear that the village had such a lot to do. He understood the sentiment. He also knew that the notion of children growing up and finding love made Mom nervous. She thought no one ever crossed the line to adulthood, after her own generation.
As they traced their route back to the hotel, Chlorine expressed her curiosity. “I hadn’t realized that imps made so many gems. I thought that Jewel the Nymph handled that.”
“Imps make all the gems,” Ortant said proudly. “From the sparkles of light in morning dew to the most enduring treasure. Where do you think the nymph obtains her supply?”
“I had thought it was from a barrel that never emptied.”
“Because we imps are constantly working to replenish it. We fashion the gems; the
jewel nymphs place them for others to find. So it has ever been.”
“Oh, I’m so impressed!” she exclaimed. “I mean, not the imp, but the surprise, the awe of your accomplishment—”
“I understand,” Ortant said, looking pleased. It was clear that her art was working on him, too.
They arrived at the hotel. David, Karen, and Woofer remained engrossed by the magic mirror. Mom rousted them out and packed everyone upstairs.
After a flurry of preparations for the night, the others were in their bedrooms and Sean was in the suite’s living room with the animals. He stretched out on the largest couch, discovering how tired he was. He would lull himself to sleep with mental pictures of Chlorine innocently undressing. He knew their relationship wasn’t real, but it was one hell, or rather, heaven, of an illusion, and he wanted to savor it while he could.
All three pets approached him. “Oh, you want to share my bed?” he asked. “Well, okay, but don’t bleep on it.” He noted with bemusement that he still wasn’t able to say “poop,” that evidently being on the proscribed list for his age.
“Seean,” Tweeter chirped.
Sean glanced at the bird. “I swear, it sounded as if you said my name.”
Tweeter nodded. “Taalk,” he chirped.
“You want to talk to me? This is getting hard to believe.”
“Taaalk,” Midrange meowed.
“Rrryess,” Woofer agreed.
“But I’m making the effort to believe,” Sean said. “What is it so important that you guys have to tell me?”
The three seemed at a loss. “Aaaask,” Woofer said.
“Oh, you mean it’s hard for you to talk human, so I’d better play twenty questions?”
All three nodded.
“Okay. Can I take it for granted that you three remain friendly to our family, despite your new intelligence, and wish us no harm?” They nodded. “Um, maybe we can simplify this. How about a single woof, meow, or tweet for yes, two for no, and three for I’d better do some more asking about that one?”
There was a small chorus of single sounds.
“Maybe we’d better have a single spokespet,” Sean said, smiling. “I think Tweeter makes a single sound most readily, so I’ll address him, but if anyone else has something to say, cut in.” He pondered a moment. “Is there some danger to us?”
“Tweet.”
“Does it relate to the storm we’re trying to outdistance—Happy Bottom?”
“Tweet.”
“Well, we’re going to get moving on north in the morning. Isn’t that good enough?”
“Tweet tweet.”
“How about the crack of dawn, and gobble breakfast while driving?”
“Tweet.”
“Okay, I’ll go tell Dad now. He won’t be asleep yet.” Sean started to get up.
“Tweet tweet tweet.”
“Um.” Sean considered again. “Something more I should know about this?”
“Tweet.”
“Now, let me figure. You guys must’ve learned something we humans didn’t. But you were with us all the time—two of you with me, one with the kids. So it can’t be—say! Was it from before? Did you talk with other animals somewhere along the way?”
“Tweet.”
“And they know something the humans don’t.”
“Tweet tweet tweet.”
“Okay, that we don’t. How about the imps? They know?”
“Tweet.”
“Which is why they’re getting the bleep out of here. The storm. But we already knew about that.”
“Tweet tweet tweet.”
“Something more about the storm. Apart from stirring up things and maybe blowing us away. But I can’t figure what.”
“Woimps,” Woofer said.
“Sure, I’m a wimp. But I still can’t figure this out.”
“Woof woof.”
“Oh, I’m not a wimp? Then what were you saying?”
“Meoimp,” Midrange said.
“Oh, the imps! They’re friendly, aren’t they?”
“Tweet.”
“And the storm means trouble for them too. Because of the magic dust it’s stirring up, which can bring madness when there’s too much. So they are clearing up and out.”
“Tweet tweet tweet.”
“More on that.” Sean pondered again. “They know what they’re doing, don’t they? They’re on schedule?”
“Tweet tweet.”
“Oho! They’re not going to make it in time?”
“Tweet.”
“Because we delayed them by taking up their time and effort?”
The three pets exchanged glances. “Tweet tweet,” Tweeter said doubtfully.
“But we might have? At least we made it rougher for them by making a distraction when they’re desperately busy?”
“Tweet.”
“Now I got it. So is there any way we can help?”
“Tweet.”
“By like maybe carrying things—say! If we stepped out of accommodation, we’d be huge compared to them, and could carry a whole lot for them. Then they’d get done in time.”
“Tweet.”
“I’ll ask Dad.” This time there was no protest as he got up. He went to the master bedroom and knocked on the door. In a moment Dad opened it. “What is it, Sean?”
“The pets told me: the imps aren’t going to get their stuff all moved in time, maybe because we delayed them. We could maybe help them—”
“We’ll inquire,” Dad said. He stepped out, and they walked out of the suite and downstairs. The pets came along.
There was no one there. “They must be out working,” Sean said. “And they never said a word to us.”
“We’ll find them.” They went out the main door, and Dad took the magic lantern. “We need to stay accommodated for this, I think.”
They had hardly started down the path before Quieta appeared. Her apron was mussed and her hair coming loose, as if she had been hectically busy. “Oh, I’m sorry! I must have neglected you,” she cried. “What do you need?”
“We are concerned that we have delayed you at a critical time,” Dad said. “Can we help you to do what you have to do, before we move on?”
She shook her head. “That is a very courteous thought. But though we could use your assistance, it would be at too great a cost. You have just time to get clear of Xanth before the dust intensifies, if you start at dawn and do not stop. I used the mirror to talk with the Good Magician, who is always correct. You must not delay at all. If you remained to help us, you would be caught, and then you would not be able to escape Xanth. You might be trapped here a very long and bad time. We would be terrible hosts if we let that happen.”
“Maybe we could help now, at night, before dawn,” Sean suggested.
“No, I do not mean to disparage your effort, but you are Mundanes. You would blunder in the dark, and be of no use. Only by daylight could you help, and that is when you must be gone.”
Dad looked at Sean. “I don’t like this, but I think we had better depart on schedule.”
“I guess so,” Sean agreed reluctantly. “The best thing we can do for these good folk is to get the bleep out of their way.”
Dad turned back to Quieta. “We apologize for delaying you. We shall depart at the crack of dawn. Don’t take any trouble for our breakfast or anything; we’ll move out on our own.”
“Thank you,” she said. “But there is food you can take. Woofer knows where it is. I wish you well on your journey.” She turned and went back down the path.
“I feel like a heel,” Sean muttered.
“So do I,” Dad agreed. “But it’s the best we can do.” They returned to the hotel.
Sean settled down on the couch again, and the pets settled on or around him. He closed his eyes, and saw a mental picture of Chlorine wearing a filmy nightdress. Now, if he could just get to sleep with her beside him …
Before dawn the parents were up and knocking on doors. Sean never knew how they did it, bu
t they were always alert when they needed to be. Chlorine looked sleepy but still lovely, while Nimby looked the same as ever: neutral. While the others were blearily getting washed and dressed, Dad started loading things into the RV and Mom went to the kitchen with Woofer to fetch the food left there for them. Sean went from room to room and collected the used sheets for the laundry, trying to save Quieta that much effort. He still felt guilty.
He took the pets out for a quick walk so they could do their business. It was weird stepping out of the accommodation spell; suddenly they were all giants, beside the dollhouse hotel. He took the pets on to the RV, knowing how important it was to have no delay for any reason.
Just before dawn they were all bundled into the vehicle, and Dad was starting the motor. The imps were still hurrying around, doing their work. Sean thought he saw Quieta, and waved to her, but wasn’t sure she saw him. She looked tired.
They drove back along the access road to the trollway. Suddenly there was a loud ripping noise, and a jagged crack appeared in the dark sky, and the whole landscape lightened. “What happened?” David cried, startled.
“Oh, that was the crack of dawn,” Chlorine said. “To let in the light. Sometimes it gets stuck on night, and the sun won’t come up because it’s afraid of the dark, so the shroud of night has to be cracked open.”
Even Karen evidently found that somewhat far-fetched, but it did seem to be the way it was in Xanth.
They broke out the food the imps had left them, which had made the accommodation change with them. There was something for everyone, ranging from miraculously still-cold eye scream to dog biscuits. Even in their absence, the imps were excellent hosts.
Yon Ill Wind Page 11
