“Yeah, it was interesting.”
That was putting it mildly.
“I have to go to the bathroom. Sorry I tripped over you.” I wasn’t trying to be short with him, but I really had to go. I also felt quite embarrassed about my behavior that I now knew he had witnessed.
“I’ll move before ya come back. I didn’t mean to make ya fall. I thought you’d be sleeping longer.”
“If only I could.” I mumbled to myself and started down the hall.
I returned to my room about fifteen minutes later. It took a while in the bathroom considering how my eyes looked like a raccoon from crying with mascara on last night. It was dried on and I had to scrub to get it off.
When I reached my door, Brett was gone and I felt the heartache all over again. How was I going to deal with this too? He did deserve to have someone he didn’t have to worry about losing. He deserved far more than what my life had to offer…with or without Miguel. I needed to find a way to let go. I just didn’t know how. He was part of our lives now, part of me. I needed him.
Crossing the dark bedroom, I kicked the unknown items out of the way, and went to my dresser to get some different clothes to change into. I grabbed some shorts and a tank top and finally removed the dress.
After changing, I walked across the room, cautious of any missiles that were scattered along the floor, and climbed up in bed. Lifting the blanket, I slid inside, instantly feeling a body next to mine.
Reaching over, I wanted to make sure it was Brett and not someone else. I didn’t even want to think about that possibility right now. My hand connected with his chest, a little harder than I meant to.
“Uh!” He breathed out.
“Sorry. I didn’t know you were there.”
He rolled over, pulling me into his chest. I laid my head down on him and wrapped my leg over his. It was a natural position for us after doing it so many times in the hospital and here when I’d have a hard night. It was peaceful, yet this time laced with sadness.
His arm was wrapped around my back and the other reached over and smoothed my hair down.
“I see ya finally took that dress off.”
“Yeah,” I whispered. I wasn’t sure what to say at this point.
“It’s a shame. I was hopin’ you’d wear it all day today.”
Normally his humor helped. Right now, it just made it worse. I nodded my head, closing my eyes, as I cuddled into him.
“I’m sorry if I was too pushy last night, Mel. I didn’t say any of that to hurt ya. I promise.”
“I know,” I whispered. “I don’t like it, but you’re right.”
He sighed. “Promise me something.”
“What?”
“Well, two things. One, that you’ll consider what I said. If nothing else, ya deserve to have closure and peace.” He took a deep breath before continuing. “And two, that no matter what happens, we’ll remain friends. I don’t wanna lose you and Josiah.”
God, he was breaking my heart. Did he already plan on me going back to Miguel? I couldn’t do this.
“No matter what, we’ll always be friends, Brett. Josie loves you just as much as I do.” That was all I could promise right now.
He kissed my head, keeping his arms wrapped around me, and holding me close. Regardless of how things had turned out, his body felt surprisingly reassuring. Returning his affectionate gesture, I lifted my head and kissed his cheek, before quickly falling asleep in his arms.
CHAPTER 38
When I woke the next morning, Brett was gone, but he had placed a teddy bear from Josiah’s room in his spot and wrapped my arm around it. That made me smile. I quickly gathered my things and got in the shower, determined that today would be better. My face thanked me for the water. It was swollen and sore from the crying.
After dressing, I headed down to the kitchen for some coffee and toast. Looking at the clock on the stove, I saw that it was already 10:30. I really did sleep in. I hadn’t done that in a long time.
Taking my cup coffee in hand, I sat at the table to wait for the toast. The newspaper was spread out and my jaw fell open when I noticed the pictures in front of me. In the community section was a full-page report on the fundraising event we had gone to. There were pictures of various people who’d attended spread across the page. But in the middle of it all, were two pictures of Brett and me.
The first one was when he was encouraging me as we approached the journalists. His left arm was wrapped possessively around my waist, pulling me into his body. His right hand was cupping my face, his mouth next to my ear whispering. The look on my face said it all. It was ecstasy, love, passion, and need. I stared in awe at how I looked.
Sliding my attention to the next picture, this one taken inside the event, I was somewhat surprised. I never noticed photographers in there, but clearly they were. Brett and I were dancing, our bodies closely intertwined. It must have been only minutes before we left, our blossoming desire perfectly captured. His hands were gripping my ass, pulling me into him, and his eyes were burning with lust. I was looking up at him, my eyes pleading for more as I bit my lip.
They were actually very good pictures. I wanted to keep them. It was just bittersweet considering how everything turned out.
Moving my hand, I noticed Brett’s handwriting below the pictures.
“You are so beautiful!” And, “You have no idea what I was thinking right then. Or do you?”
I laughed. Leave it to him to make me laugh about this.
“I see ya found our pictures.”
I turned my head to see him coming in the kitchen behind me. He was wearing his usual jeans and t-shirt, work boots, and sexy grin.
“Yep, I met this really hot guy, but he ran off. Any idea how I can find him?”
“I’ll put my best men on it and see what we can do.”
“Please do, it is of the utmost importance.”
And just like that we were back to our normal selves. We talked and laughed about the other pictures in the paper. Some were funny, others admirable. The foundation raised over a million dollars last night. I was impressed, and proud to know that I had been part of it.
Finishing my breakfast, I decided to go to Joan’s to get Josie. It was Sunday and I didn’t have any work to do, so I suggested that after we picked him up, we could all go to the park since it was going to be nice out. Brett agreed and drove me over there.
********
Leaving the kids with the men, Joan and I stayed in her bedroom for over an hour. We sat cross-legged on her bed, like two teenage girls, and made the most of our “girl time” by catching up on all the gossip at the shop, and filling her in on all the details about my night with Brett, the pictures, and Miguel.
We laughed, cried, and laughed some more. It was exactly what I needed. Of course, a bottle of Jack would’ve been nice too, but even I would have to agree that it was a little too early in the day for that.
After finishing our last bout of laughter, Joan turned toward me with a much more serious look than she usually had.
“So what are you going to do?”
“About?”
We’d talked about a lot of different things. Even though I had an idea of what she was referring to, I was hoping that I was wrong.
“I mean, Miguel. It’s clear what you’d do with Brett.”
I gave her the evil eye.
“I mean, honestly Mel, you have to respect how caring he is. He isn’t doing all that for himself. He’s trying to help you and Josie, too.”
Why couldn’t this all just go away? I leaned my head back, taking a deep breath, before I answered her.
“Yes, I know, Joan. I don’t know what I’m going to do.”
“Just talk to Miguel.”
“I don’t know if I can.”
“I’m not trying to be the bearer of bad news or anything, but he has rights. If he was cleared of all charges, he can have visitation with Josie. What will you do then?”
I hadn’t even considered that
possibility. What the hell was I going to do about that? Send Josie with a man I didn’t trust or even know who he was anymore? God, this just kept getting worse. Where was the light at the end of the tunnel?
Realizing where my thoughts were headed, she patted my leg affectionately, and quickly tried to make it better.
“Don’t worry. I’m sure Miguel won’t do anything stupid concerning Josie. Especially when he’s still recovering and you’ve gone through so much.”
“What am I going to do?” I whispered, more to myself than her.
Her words did little to comfort me now. Once the idea was in my head, I was sure to turn it into a full-fledged horror movie.
“Just talk to him, Mel. It’s the only way to figure this out. Besides.” She grinned. “If you don’t like what he says, then…” She paused, waiting for me to catch up to her train of thought. Little did she know, I’d been considering it all morning.
“If not, then you have another amazing man who’d do anything for you and Josie.”
I nodded my head in thought.
“You’re actually very lucky, Mel.”
I nodded again.
“Okay, enough! Let’s get your hair done and put some make up on. You need to feel pretty!”
She jumped up, hurrying to collect her beauty supplies, before I could protest. That was Joan’s way of feeling good. I would’ve been happy lying around in sweats, eating potato chips. But I agreed, knowing she was probably right.
Walking out of her room, I turned the corner, pausing when I noticed Brett’s eyes widening in surprise. Maybe he thought I’d come out in pieces this time. I loved seeing his reaction though. It made me feel loved.
“You look great! Maybe we should hire Joan more often,” he said, not realizing his insult.
“Oh, so normally I don’t, huh?”
Trust me, I noticed the “we” he used in that sentence. That’s how everything was during the past six months. We were a couple, without being a couple. It sucked!
“That’s not what I mean.”
He stood from the couch and came to give me a hug, but didn’t release me. I was surprised because he was usually more private about us when we were around other people. Wrapping my arms around him, I held on tight, eager for any affection I could get from him.
“You’re always beautiful. Even when ya had raccoon eyes this mornin’.” His wicked little grin returned, his eyes lighting with mischief.
Stepping back, I hit him in his chest.
“You saw that? It was dark! How could you see?”
“It was kinda hard to miss the little white specks surrounded by huge black circles.”
I smacked him again. “Brut!”
Laughing together, I glanced over to find Joan and Paul watching us. Yeah, your sister’s in a big pile of shit, Joan. Her husband wants her back, she wants someone else, Josie needs a dad, and nothing seems right.
“Okay, let’s go boys.” I reached over and grabbed Josie. “We have a date with the park.”
Josie clapped his hands and reached for Brett.
“Oh I see how it is, little traitor.”
I really didn’t mind. I was glad people loved Josie, and he still felt safe after everything that had happened.
“That’s right, little tiger.” Brett high-fived Josie, then lifted him in his arms. “We men have to stick together here.”
Brett headed out to the car with Josie, cheerfully bouncing down the steps, as Joan and I paused to say goodbye.
“Mel, it’s gonna be hard. He…” she pointed toward the car, “Is fucking fantastic. I don’t envy what you have to go through to figure this out, but I’m thankful that either way you have two men who love you both.”
She thought Miguel still loved me too? It had to be a conspiracy.
Looking where she just pointed, I refocused my thoughts on Brett before responding. He was the one who made me feel safe, he was the one who stopped his life to save us, and he was the one who made me smile every day now.
“I know, Joan. He really is.”
I gave her a hug, said goodbye to Paul, and went out to join my men.
********
The park was perfect. Mike, one of the two regular security men, had come along with us today. I didn’t know why, but assumed with Miguel back, Brett was being more cautious. Thankfully, he stayed out of sight, and I rarely remembered he was there.
After playing on the playground, we spread a blanket out under a tree, and ate a late lunch together. It was in the low eighties, but Brett was wearing his usual jeans and tight t-shirt. I was thankful for the short break in the shade though. Even with shorts on, I felt hot and sweaty after running and playing with Josie all day. Well, maybe it had a little to do the fact that I was watching Brett every chance I had as well. But how could I not? His tattoos were enticingly peeking out below his shirt sleeves, the piercing on his chest, visible every time he’d move, and the jeans, well, I doubt I could begin to describe how nice his backside looked in those. Yeah, the heat was definitely coming more from me than the weather.
Noticing the paddleboats on the lake, Brett had insisted we get one. Josie loved it. He bounced up and down, squealed, repeated every word we told him, and laughed until he was snorting. Ironically, Brett did almost all those things too. Okay, fine, I’ll admit it, I did too.
Finishing our water adventure, we walked along the lake, feeding the geese while trying to keep Josie out of their droppings. As we walked back toward the playground, Joan’s words echoed through my mind. Brett is fucking fantastic. She always knew how to describe the men in my life.
Laughing to myself, I glanced beside me to find Brett watching me curiously.
“Wanna share the fun?” He asked.
“Oh no, not this time.”
“Oh yes, princess. I think so.”
Before I had a chance to run away, he leaned down, scooping me up in his arms. I squealed and squirmed, trying to get loose, but his strong arms easily held me close.
Knowing my weakness, he started tickling me. I could’ve handled it, but the amusement in his eyes as he sought out each tender spot on my body, made me laugh even harder.
Unable to control my flaring legs, I finally broke free, both of us falling to the ground together. Luckily, we were in the grass now, away from the goose poo. Josie hurried over to us, giggling at our funny actions, and joined in on the fun.
“Get her, tiger!” Brett cheered him on as they tickled every spot they could reach. Brett was reaching a few spots that he probably shouldn’t have, but I wasn’t complaining.
“Ma, unny!” Josie yelled.
“Funny, huh?” I asked.
I fought back and tickled them both, going from one to the other, until I was too exhausted, and tears were sliding down my cheeks from laughing so hard. Lying back, I conceded to defeat. Josie sat down beside me and laid his head on my tummy. The day was wearing him out as well.
Lying down beside me, Brett leaned on his elbow and reached over, wiping my tear away with a tender look. All joking gone from his eyes, he took a minute to gaze at mine. Without saying the words, he was telling me he loved me. I hoped he could read my expression as much as I could his. I loved him too.
After returning home, we gave Josie a bath and had a quick dinner. That was the most activity he had had in nearly six months. He fell asleep in Brett’s arms before we even got him in his bed.
“Goodnight, sweetheart. I love you,” I whispered as I kissed his forehead.
I tucked the extra pillows around him, something I did out of habit now. His bed was low to the ground and he was fine without them, but I was an overly-cautious mommy sometimes.
Walking over to the door, I paused, watching Brett as he glanced around the room, doing his usual “security check”. I didn’t know what he’d find, except maybe a rampant teddy bear or crazed truck going off, but he always looked for anything out of place or any signs of foul play. He didn’t take any chances with Josie, either.
Lea
ning over Josie, he kissed the top of his head, and whispered, “Love ya, tiger.”
We turned the lights off and shut the door halfway. Brett couldn’t take a shower unless he called one of the other men inside to cover for him, so he told me to go ahead and he’d take his later.
Hurrying to finish everything, I washed and changed as quickly as possible, eager to get back to Brett. We were having such a wonderful day, I didn’t want to lose any time with him.
After checking a few rooms, I found him sitting in the kitchen, staring at our pictures again.
“I like those pictures.” I smiled and walked through the doorway.
“Yeah, me too. If I had a bedroom, I’d hang them next to my bed. Maybe even blow the one up and put a huge one on my ceilin’ so I could stare at ya all night.”
“Hmm, that might help chase the nightmares away.”
“Mel, you’re right.” He acted like he was thinking, tapping his chin in thought. “You are the angel who protects one from nightmares.”
“Ugh!” I exclaimed.
He always won in our little word wars. But deep inside, I loved the things he said about me. I shoved his shoulder playfully and grabbed a soda from the fridge.
“I’m gonna go watch TV before bed.”
“Okay, I’ll be in there in a bit.”
“No drawing mustaches on my picture, mister! I want to keep those.”
I got him that time. Ha, ha, point for me!
I walked out of the kitchen, and turned toward the living room, coming to a dead stop near the front door. What the hell? Miguel and Dale had just entered through the door, both pausing their steps in the same fashion as I had.
Miguel was wearing dark jeans, a white polo shirt, and looked thinner than what I remembered. Looking closer, his face looked older, worn out. I guess it’s a hard life, living with your actions.
“Why do you keep ruining the most wonderful days I’ve had in months?”
Twisted Truths & Leveled Lies Page 35
