How to Succeed at Being Yourself: Finding the Confidence to Fulfill Your Destiny

by Joyce Meyer

Ephesians 5:19,20

  We continually give thanks to God the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ (the Messiah), as we are praying for you.

  Colossians 1:3

  And whatever you do [no matter what it is] in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus and in [dependence upon] His Person, giving praise to God the Father through Him.

  Colossians 3:17

  Be unceasing in prayer [praying perseveringly]; Thank [God] in everything [no matter what the circumstances may be, be thankful and give thanks], for this is the will of God for you [who are] in Christ Jesus [the Revealer and Mediator of that will].

  1 Thessalonians 5:17,18

  First of all, then, I admonish and urge that petitions, prayers, intercessions, and thanksgivings be offered on behalf of all men.

  1 Timothy 2:1

  Through Him, therefore, let us constantly and at all times offer up to God a sacrifice of praise, which is the fruit of lips that thankfully acknowledge and confess and glorify His name.

  Hebrews 13:15

  Powerful living comes through thanksgiving. One of the ways we can “pray without ceasing” is by being thankful all day long, praising God for His goodness, mercy, loving-kindness, grace, long-suffering and patient nature.

  THE PRAYER OF INTERCESSION

  To intercede means to stand in the gap for someone else. (Ezekiel 22:30.)

  If there is a breach in people’s relationship with God due to a particular sin in their life, we have the privilege of placing ourselves in that breach and praying for them. If they have a need, we can inter-cede for them and expect to see them comforted and encouraged while they wait. We can also expect a timely breakthrough for them concerning their need being met.

  I don’t know what I would do if people did not intercede for me. Literally thousands of people have told me over the years that they pray for me. I actually ask God for intercessors. I petition Him to give me people to intercede for me and for the fulfillment of the ministry to which He has called me.

  We need each other! If our prayers are only filled with petition and are void of intercession, that also makes a statement about our character — just as when petition outweighs praise and thanksgiving in our prayer life.

  I have discovered that the more I am delivered from selfishness, the more I pray for others — and vice versa.

  Praying for others is equivalent to sowing seed. We all know that we must sow seed if we are to reap a harvest. (Galatians 6:7.) Sowing seed into the lives of other people is one sure way to reap a harvest in our own life. Each time we pray for someone else, we are assuring our own success.

  If you want to succeed at being yourself, I highly recommend that you include ample intercession for others in your prayer life. Give away what you need or want.

  If you want to be a success, help someone else succeed by praying for them. If you want your ministry to succeed, pray for someone else’s ministry. If you want your business to succeed, pray for someone else’s business. If you need a breakthrough over some bad habit that is hindering you and holding you back, pray for someone else who has a need in a similar area.

  Remember, we are often tempted to judge, which only holds us in bondage. Give people prayer instead of judgment, and you will make much faster progress toward the fulfillment of your destiny.

  THE PRAYER OF COMMITMENT

  When we are tempted to worry or take the care of some situation in life, we should pray the prayer of commitment.

  For example, if I have done my best to get to an appointment on time, and due to circumstances beyond my control it appears I am going to be late, instead of becoming frantic I have learned to pray the prayer of commitment. I say, “Lord, I am giving this situation to You; do something to make things work out right.” I find that when I do that, things do work out all right. Either the Lord gives me favor with those I am supposed to meet and they totally understand, or I arrive and find they were also running behind and were concerned I would have to wait for them.

  God intervenes in our situations when we commit them to Him.

  Commit to the Lord your children, your marriage, your personal relationships and especially anything you may be tempted to be concerned about: Casting the whole of your care [all your anxieties, all your worries, all your concerns, once and for all] on Him, for He cares for you affectionately and cares about you watchfully (1 Peter 5:7).

  In order to succeed at being ourselves, we must continually be committing ourselves to God, giving to Him those things that appear to be holding us back. Only God can take proper care of those types of situations.

  In my own life I found that the more I tried to take care of things myself, the bigger mess my life became. I was quite independent and found it difficult to humble myself and admit that I needed help. However, when I finally submitted to God in these areas and found the joy of casting all my care on Him, I could not believe I had lived so long under such huge amounts of pressure.

  Worry releases pressure; prayer releases peace.

  You and I may find that we have a timetable for things to occur in our lives, and we may also find that things don’t happen according to our timetable. It may be disappointing initially, but the best thing to do is give it to God in prayer. As we often say, “Let go and let God.”

  There is much to be done in our lives before we reach the fullness of our destiny.

  When I look back over the years of my life, all I can say is, “Wow!” So much has happened that it is almost unbelievable.

  Only God really knows what needs to be done, and He is the only One Who is qualified to do it. The more we sincerely commit ourselves to Him, the more progress we make.

  Pray the prayer of commitment often. Remember, anytime, anywhere is an acceptable time for prayer.

  THE PRAYER OF CONSECRATION__________________

  The final type of prayer is the prayer of consecration, the prayer in which we give ourselves to God. In the prayer of consecration, we dedicate our lives and all that we are to Him.

  I recall sitting in a church service many years ago. It was missions Sunday, and as the organ played and we sang a song based on Isaiah, I was moved in my heart to offer myself to God for His service. I remember singing the words everyone else was singing, “Here I am, Lord…” “Send me!”

  I had sung these same words on other mission Sundays, but this time it was different. Something was stirring in my heart and emotions. There were tears in my eyes, and I could feel that I was truly giving myself to God for His will to be accomplished in me.

  I often think of that Sunday. Nothing happened right away; as a matter of fact, I don’t recall anything particular happening for years after that. But somehow I know in my heart that my commitment to God that particular Sunday had something to do with the call I received into the ministry some years later.

  In order for God to use us, we must consecrate ourselves to Him.

  I still consecrate myself to God in prayer on a regular basis. I say, “Here I am, Lord. I am Yours; do with me as You please.” Then sometimes I add, “I hope I like what You choose, Lord, but if I don’t, do it anyway; Your will be done and not mine.”

  When we truly consecrate ourselves to the Lord, we lose the burden of trying to run our own lives. I would rather voluntarily follow God than struggle to get Him to follow me. He knows where He is going, and I know I will reach my destination safely if I allow Him to lead.

  When we dedicate our children to the Lord, we are, in effect, giving them to Him for His purposes. We are saying, “Lord, I know You have a specific purpose for these children, and I want You to have Your way in their lives. I will raise them for You, not for myself, for Your purpose and will, not for my own.”

  Consecration is a powerful thing, but it must be sincere. It is quite easy to sing along with everyone else a song like “I Surrender All.” We may even feel moved emotionally, but the real test is found in daily life when things don’t always go the way we thought they would. Then we must sing again, “I
Surrender All,” consecrating ourselves to God afresh.

  Consecration and/or dedication to God is the most important aspect of succeeding at being ourselves. We don’t even know what we are supposed to be, let alone know how to become whatever it is. But as we regularly keep our lives on the altar in consecration to God, He will do the work that needs to be done in us, so He may do the work He desires to do through us.

  Remember, all of these types of prayer are simple, and we don’t need to complicate them. They can be used with ease whenever needed in life. We must never forget to do what we are told in God’s Word: Pray at all times (on every occasion, in every season) in the Spirit, with all [manner of ] prayer and entreaty. To that end keep alert and watch with strong purpose and perseverance, interceding in behalf of all the saints (God’s consecrated people) (Ephesians 6:18).

  SHORT AND SIMPLE IS MORE POWERFUL THAN LONG AND COMPLICATED__________________

  “And when you pray, do not keep on babbling like pagans, for they think they will be heard because of their many words. Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask him.”

  Matthew 6:7,8 NIV

  I believe God has instructed me to pray and make my requests with as few words as possible. As I follow this practice, I understand more and more why He told me to do so. I find if I can keep my request very simple and not confuse the issue by trying to come up with too many words, my prayer actually seems to be more clear and powerful.

  We need to spend our energy releasing our faith, not repeating phrases over and over that only serve to make the prayer long and involved.

  It amazes me that we as human beings are so deceived regarding the true value of things. We always think more is better, when actually nothing could be further from the truth. Sometimes the more we have, the less we appreciate it. The more things we have to take care of, the less we take proper care of anything. Oftentimes, more only brings confusion.

  Sometimes I get confused about what I want to wear on a given day or to a certain event. I have pastor friends in India who don’t experience this kind of confusion. When they go to their closet, they only have one suit, so they just put it on and go.

  I am certainly not against being prosperous, nor am I against having a lot of clothes. Clothes are actually one of the material things in this life I really enjoy, and God has blessed me with an abundance of them. But I am using them as an example to make my point.

  Unless we use wisdom and make a conscious effort to keep life simple, all of our abundance will only serve to bring confusion and unhappiness rather than peace and joy.

  It has actually been difficult for me to keep my prayers short and simple. I don’t mean that I am advocating praying only for a short period of time, but I am suggesting that each prayer be simple, direct, to the point and filled with faith. Let me give you an example.

  If I need forgiveness, I can pray: “Lord, I lost my temper, and I’m sorry, I ask You to forgive me. I receive Your forgiveness, and I thank You for it, in Jesus’ name. Amen!”

  Or I can pray: “Oh, Lord, I’m so wretched. I feel so miserable. It seems that I just cannot do anything right. No matter how hard I try, I am always fouling up and making mistakes. I lost my temper, and now everyone is mad at me. I have made a fool of myself, and I just don’t know what I’m going to do. I have got to stop getting mad.

  “I’m so sorry, Father. Please forgive me. Oh, God, please forgive me. Please, Lord, I promise I will never do it again. Oh, Lord, I feel so guilty. I feel so bad. I am so ashamed of myself. I don’t see how You can use me, God. I have so many problems.

  “Well, Lord, I don’t feel any better, but I will try to believe that I am forgiven.”

  I think you will agree that the first prayer would be much more powerful than the second.

  Here’s another example, a prayer for progress:

  “Lord, I am weary of waiting to see progress in my life. I need for You either to do something that will bring a breakthrough in my circumstances or to give me a fresh anointing to wait. I trust You, Lord, to answer my prayer, and I want You to know that whatever Your answer may be, I love You.”

  Compare that version with this one:

  “Lord, I just feel that I can’t wait any longer to see a breakthrough. I have got to see something this week, God, or I don’t think I can hold on any longer. I hear about everyone else’s progress, and I feel that I don’t ever make any progress. It has been so long, Father, since I have received any kind of blessing, and I am tired. I am weary. I am depressed. I am discouraged. I am disappointed. I feel like giving up…”

  (I might stop at this point in the prayer and cry for a long time, then resume praying.)

  “…God, I hope You are hearing me, because I seriously don’t think I can go on one more day like this. I don’t know what I’m doing wrong. Don’t You love me anymore?

  “Where are You, Lord? I can’t feel Your Presence. I don’t see You moving in my life. I don’t know if I am hearing from You or not. I am confused. I feel worse now than when I started praying. What’s wrong with me? I don’t even know if I know how to pray. Oh, won’t You please help me, Father?”

  You can think of more examples on your own, but I hope these get my point across.

  I began to realize that my problem in praying was that I didn’t have faith that my prayer would get through if it was short, simple and to the point. I had fallen into the same trap that many people do — “the-longer-the-better” mentality. However, after praying, most of the time I felt confused and unsure, as though I still had not gotten the job done.

  Now as I follow God’s direction to keep it simple and make my request with the least amount of words possible, I experience a much greater release of my faith, and I know that God has heard me and will answer.

  As I said previously, confidence in prayer is vital to success in any area. Be really honest with yourself about your prayer life and make adjustments wherever they are needed. If you are not praying enough, pray more. If your prayers are complicated, simplify them. If you need to keep them more of a secret just between you and God, then quit talking about them to everyone you meet.

  The great thing about being convicted of error in our lives is that we can then make a change.

  HOW MANY TIMES SHOULD WE PRAY ABOUT THE SAME THING?__________________

  Keep on asking and it will be given you; keep on seeking and you will find; keep on knocking [reverently] and [the door] will be opened to you.

  For everyone who keeps on asking receives; and he who keeps on seeking finds; and to him who keeps on knocking, [the door] will be opened.

  Matthew 7:7,8

  It is difficult to lay down any strict rules on the subject of how often to pray about the same thing. I have heard some people say, “Pray repeatedly until you see the breakthrough.” I have heard others say, “If you pray more than once for something, then you don’t believe you got it the first time.”

  I don’t believe we can make any strict rules, but I do think there are some guidelines that may apply to help us have even more confidence in our prayer power.

  If my children told me their shoes were worn out and asked me to get them some new ones, I would probably respond, “OK, I’ll get them as soon as I can.”

  What I would want from my children is trust. I would want them to trust me to do what they asked me to do. I wouldn’t mind, and might even like it, if they occasionally said, “Boy, Mom, I’m sure looking forward to those new shoes,” or “I’m excited about my new shoes, Mom; I’ll be glad when I get them and can wear them.” Both of those statements would declare to me that they believed I was going to do what I promised. They would actually be reminding me of my promise, but in a way that would not question my integrity.

  On the other hand, if they came back to me an hour later and made the same request again, it might irritate me. If they said, “Mom, my shoes are worn out, and I’m asking you to get me some new ones,” I would think, “I heard you the first tim
e, and I told you I would get them as soon as I can. What is your problem?”

  I believe sometimes when we ask God the same thing over and over, it is a sign of doubt and unbelief, not of faith and persistence.

  When I ask the Lord for something in prayer, and that thing comes to my mind or heart again later, I talk to Him about it again. But when I do, I refrain from asking Him the same thing as if I think He didn’t hear me the first time.

  When I pray, I thank the Lord that He is working on the situation I prayed about previously. But I don’t come back and repray the same thing all over again.

  Faithful, persistent prayer builds even more faith and confidence in us as we continue to pray. The stronger our confidence is, the better off we are.

  Therefore, I urge you to do things that build confidence, not things that tear it down. Do things that honor God, not things that dishonor Him.

  In Matthew 7, Jesus tells us to ask and to keep on asking, and we will receive. He also tells us to knock and keep on knocking, and it will be opened to us, to seek and keep on seeking, and we will find.

  As I have stated, I believe this message refers to persistence not repetition. We should keep pressing on and never give up — if we are sure we are pursuing something that is the will of God. It is definitely the will of God for each of us to succeed at being ourselves and find fulfillment in being all He designed us to be. Therefore, I believe that faithful persistent prayer is an important factor in reaching that goal.

  BE A BELIEVER, NOT A BEGGAR__________________

  Let us then fearlessly and confidently and boldly draw near to the throne of grace (the throne of God’s unmerited favor to us sinners), that we may receive mercy [for our failures] and find grace to help in good time for every need [appropriate help and well-timed help, coming just when we need it].