“I’ve spent so long feeling responsible for his death, guilty that I’d lived and he didn’t, that he missed knowing his son, and then you told me he was still alive,” he murmured thickly, holding onto me like he thought I might disappear. “And now, it’s like I’ve lost him again, and all I can do is hope he’s alive.”
“We’ll find the truth,” I whispered, trying to comfort him. “We’ll bring him home.” He released a shaky breath and rubbed my arms.
“Let’s get those videos where they need to go and update the others.”
***
When we got to the clubhouse, Clutch was in the kitchen cooking up something that smelled amazing. He waved a spatula at us, grinning like a fool. “Bigger kitchen,” he informed us, flipping a pancake onto a towering stack. “The others in the office.”
Crew nodded, taking my hand as he led us down a hallway, coming to a stop at a door with peeling letters that spelled Office. “Home sweet home,” he murmured, rapping lightly as he opened the door.
Norah ran to him the second she saw him and an unwelcome stab of jealousy shot through me. He hugged her, then gently set her back. “It’s true? Deacon’s alive?”
The fragile hope on her face caused the jealously to fade immediately and Crew glanced at me before nodding at her. Warmth spread through me at the simple sign of trust. He had no evidence, nothing but my word, but it was enough for him to confirm to her that Deacon was alive.
“We don’t know where he is though,” Crew said, flashing a pointed look toward his brothers. They nodded, grasping that something must have happened. “Those videos I showed you….we’re going to need them.”
“They can be used as evidence, eliminating the need for Deacon’s testimony,” I added and Norah hugged herself, looking hopeful. “Deacon’s death was the best way to protect him,” I told her and she nodded, biting her lip when it trembled.
“I just want him back,” she replied and gestured to a gorgeous little boy crawling on the floor. “He’s never met him.”
Crew tugged me close and I leaned my head into his shoulder, grateful he was willing to give us a chance.
“Norah, why don’t you go see if Clutch has the food ready?” Johnny asked kindly and Norah grinned ruefully.
“Club business,” she said with a nod, scooping baby Deacon up off the floor. “I hear you loud and clear.”
We waited until the door closed behind her and then met several expectant looks. Tori and Sloan stood by Cord and Creed as Johnny sat at the head of the table.
“There was a hit on the safe house where Deacon was kept,” I reported. “The agents are dead, but there was no sign of Deacon.” Johnny closed his eyes, his fist slamming down loudly on the table in the silent room. “We think Martinez found him, but at the moment we don’t know where Deacon is located.”
“Or if he’s even alive,” Creed commented and I nodded unhappily.
“If Martinez was going to kill him, he would have done it there, as an example,” Cord suggested. “We have to assume Deacon is alive, at least until we know differently.”
“We need to find Monty,” Crew stated, glancing at me. “He’s a threat.”
“There’s been no sign of him,” Creed replied, spreading his hands. “No retaliation. Nothing. According to Clutch, the Aces haven’t heard from him either. He’s laying low.”
“He’s not going to forget I betrayed him,” Crew said forcefully. “He’s going to come eventually.”
“And we’ll be ready when he does,” Johnny spoke, drawing all of our attention. “Until then we focus on finding Deacon.” I could see Crew’s instinctive desire to protest, but he was torn by his own need to find his friend. “I know that’s not what you want to hear, Crew, but we owe Deacon this, our commitment and loyalty to finding him.” Crew nodded in acceptance. “Monty has no friends. He barely escaped the DEA’s sweep. If he’s smart, he’s long gone.”
I didn’t bother to give my opinion on Monty’s intelligence as Johnny stood up. “Until we know, for a fact, whether or not Deacon is alive, we keep it from Norah,” Crew stated, his gaze daring anyone to argue. Everyone nodded and he let out a sigh. “She mentioned that someone called her the night she ran. It might help to know who that person was, and where she’s been. Deacon could have been keeping tabs on her.”
“She mentioned working at a coffee shop a few towns away when I talked to her,” Johnny said, then nodded at Tori. “She might tell you more.”
Tori nodded in agreement and Cord stepped forward. “We need to consider the fact that Norah and the baby might be in danger.”
“I don’t really think this is the best place for them,” Sloan mentioned quickly, and Creed shook his head firmly.
“They are not staying with us, Jailbait,” he swore and I raised my eyebrows at the nickname. “We don’t have room.”
“I know that,” she exclaimed. “I’m just saying someone needs to stay with them.”
“I can,” Crew said at the same time as Tori and they looked at each other. “Jinx,” Tori cried, pumping her arm in satisfaction. “I win.”
“That’s not how it works,” he said dryly and she frowned.
“How would you know?” She grumbled and Cord patted her back. “We’ll ask Norah, how about that?”
“You want to ask her because you think she’ll pick you,” Crew retorted. “She needs someone who can protect her.”
“And that’s why I suggested the two of us,” Tori argued, pointing to her and Cord, leaving Cord staring at her in amazement.
“You said I,” he commented and she gave him a baffled stare.
“Yeah, I means we,” she told him and I raised an eyebrow toward Crew.
“Does I mean we?” I questioned him and he gave me a sheepish glance.
“I’m not used to there being a we,” he admitted, giving me an adorably apologetic look. “Would you be willing to stay with Norah?”
“Hello? Enforcers over here?” Tori caroled, stomping toward us. “No offense, but you two can’t keep her safe.”
“I’m a former DEA agent,” I replied, feeling a little offended.
“But do you have a crowbar?”
“No,” I replied, puzzled, as Cord tried to hide a chuckle.
“I have a gun though.”
“That works too,” Tori admitted and glanced at Crew. “What are you packing?”
“At the moment? A death wish,” he drawled and she scowled, sticking her tongue out at him. “Ask Norah, Cemetery Girl, and we’ll go with what she decides.”
“If we’re done here, there’s a stack of pancakes calling my name,” Johnny said, appearing between us and we parted to let him pass. Tori ran after him, no doubt to ask Norah, who she wanted to stay with her.
When we got to the kitchen, Norah was shaking her head as she fed little Deacon a bite of pancake. “I don’t think it’s necessary, Tori.”
“But a sleepover would be so much fun,” she responded, pouting. “You could show me that guy, from the movie.”
Norah laughed, “Jason Mamoa?”
“I guess,” Tori shrugged helplessly. “We can eat ice cream and lick his abs.”
“No,” Cord vetoed immediately. “Not even no, hell no.”
“Norah, do you have any idea who called you that night?” Crew asked, accepting a plate of pancakes and bacon from Clutch. He handed it to me and waited for Clutch to make him another one.
“No,” Norah answered, her nose wrinkling. “I’m pretty sure it was male, but the voice was disguised, muffled. I couldn’t tell you who it belonged to.”
“Where did you go?” I asked, cutting into the fluffy stack slathered in butter.
Norah named a town several miles away and Tori looked startled.
“That’s where Vivian goes to school,” she cried and I glanced at her curiously. “That’s my younger sister. We just recently got back in touch.” Norah ducked her head and Tori squinted at her suspiciously. “That wouldn’t have anything to do with you, would
it?”
“Maybe?’ Norah hedged, looking guilty. “Okay, yes. She came into the coffee shop one day and my heart literally stopped for a second, thinking you’d found me.”
“Vivian said someone left a note in her dorm,” Tori replied, confused. “But you didn’t know about Vivian or the accident.”
“Who helped you?” Creed asked, chewing around a mouthful of pancakes. “You didn’t disappear on your own.”
Norah sighed, tugging on her lip as she considered her words.
“Tell us the truth,” Cord said sharply and Tori elbowed him. “This is not the time for lies,” he defended himself.
“It was Noah,” Norah confessed and we all looked at her in surprise.
“Cop Noah? As in the nephew of the Chief of Police Noah?” Clutch questioned, chomping on a piece of bacon as she nodded affirmatively. “Hmmm, didn’t see that one coming.”
“Deacon told me a long time ago that Noah owed him a favor, the no questions asked kind of favor, and if I was ever in a tight spot and couldn’t turn to the club, then I should go to Noah.” She shrugged. “That seemed like the time.”
“So Noah helped you get out of town and somewhere safe,” Crew confirmed and she nodded.
“He told you about my sister and the accident,” Tori stated, understanding dawning on her. “He would be the only one who could have. But why didn’t you tell her? Why the note?”
“I didn’t want to reveal I knew you,” Norah cried. “It wouldn’t take long for you to find me if I did.”
“One mystery solved,” Cord mumbled. “Now for the other ninety-nine.”
We heard the bar door slam open and someone shouted for Johnny. He got up, running when his name was shouted again and the rest of us followed.
“It’s Weasel,” Creed muttered. “What’s he shouting for Johnny for?” He made it out the front door first then spun around. “Crew, don’t,” he yelled, but it was too late. Crew had managed to squeeze through the jammed bodies blocking the door and I heard him shout, “Mom.”
“Oh God,” Cord mumbled, wiping his hand over his face as Clutch made the sign of the cross. “This is bad.”
Tori stood silently, her face a mask, as Sloan covered her mouth, tears in her eyes. I walked forward slowly, seeing Crew crouched on the ground next to a woman. Johnny stood next to him, his expression drawn, as Crew muttered, “Mom,” over and over again.
Creed stripped his jacket off and laid it gently over her body, covering the single word carved into her naked chest.
I read it silently, my heart hammering at the implied threat.
“Traitor.”
Chapter Twenty-Five
Cord
I felt their hands on my back, urging me away from her dead body, but I resisted, fighting them until they left me alone.
I couldn’t leave her there, splayed out on the concrete for anyone to see. Creed’s jacket covered most of her, but her bare legs were exposed, the bones in them protruding grotesquely because of how thin she was.
I picked her up, cradling her body close to mine, her weight nothing, and met Drea’s eyes. They were round with horror and a stunned sympathy, and I hated myself for being grateful it wasn’t her body. I walked past her, my brothers closing in on each side as I made my way inside the clubhouse.
Norah held little Deacon, shielding his eyes as we made our way past. Silence filled the room as our procession walked by and I laid her down gently on a bed.
Sloan and Drea quickly covered her naked body with a sheet, smoothing back her tangled hair. Sloan held Creed’s jacket as we gathered around the bed.
“This was Monty,” I choked out, staring at her still form as I remembered her excited desire to be called, “Sugar,” instead of Grandma. “I called her last night.” My head shook rapidly. “He must have known.”
“This is not your fault,” Cord said quickly.
“No, it’s Monty’s fucking fault,” I burst out, my body vibrating as rage took hold. “He’s the one responsible. It’s always been him and I’m tired of it.”
I glared at Johnny, practically panting as I snarled, “Can we go after him now, Johnny?” I waved my hand at my mom’s body, unable to look at her anymore. “Is this enough motivation?”
Regret shined under Johnny’s hooded eyes as he nodded, looking older than I’d ever seen him. “Yeah, Crew. You have my blessing, if that’s what you’re asking for.”
“It wasn’t,” I snapped, shouldering past him. “It’s time this was ended once and for all.”
I headed for the backdoor, unable to go back through the bar and all the sympathetic stares. I stood outside, my hands shaking, not sure where I was headed. The door creaked open behind me and I heard her soft footsteps stop next to me.
“Are you leaving?” Her voice trembled, but I heard the acceptance in it. She already knew.
“I have to stop him.”
“I know,” she answered, staring at her toes, her hand curving around her stomach.
“I saw her, lying there, and the only thought in my mind, was what if it had been you.”
She sucked in a sharp breath. “Crew.”
“No, don’t say it,” I told her, shaking my head. “I have to do this. For us. For the kid.”
“I don’t want to lose you.”
“I won’t make any promises,” I answered, turning swiftly and kneeling in front of her. “But I will tell you this…I love you.” She stared at me in shock and I chuckled mirthlessly. “Terrible timing and it probably seems like crazy talk to you after everything I’ve said and put you through. But it’s true. I knew it from the beginning. I just thought I didn’t have a place for you in my life. But I want to make a place for you and our kid.”
“Then stay,” she begged, her eyes huge and glossy. “Stay and we’ll fix this together.”
“I won’t put you at risk, you and the baby. You saw what he carved in her chest. It was a warning.”
“What about Deacon? You want to find him, right?”
I glanced to the side, seeing the path toward the house. “I think if I find Monty, I’ll find Deacon,” I answered, knowing it was true. Deacon wouldn’t come back until he knew the threat to Norah was eliminated. “Your safety is my first priority,” I murmured, looking at her, almost eye level with her on my knees. “Will you,” I inhaled almost afraid to ask. “Will you be here when I get back?”
“If I say no?” She asked, a curious expression on her face.
“I’ll find you,” I replied instantly. “And I’ll spend the rest of my life convincing you to give me another chance.”
“You don’t even know if I love you,” she retorted, her hand skimming my cheek.
“I know you do,” I said confidently. “Only love would have brought you back.”
“It’s not just because of the baby?” I heard the fear in her voice and I shook my head.
“No, this is about you and me,” I promised, and rested my hand over hers on her stomach. “This kid is our second chance. An excuse to overcome all the crap we let get in the way.” My jaw worked. “I said some pretty ugly things to you. I let anger and betrayal overshadow my feelings. I was wrong, but too prideful to go after you and tell you that. I won’t make the same mistake twice.”
She bumped her nose against mine, then pressed her lips to my cheek. “Don’t die,” she said, her voice aching with unshed tears. “Just don’t die.”
I sealed my mouth over hers, kissing her roughly, as my tongue claimed hers completely. She tangled her fingers in my hair as I sucked her lower lip, biting down then licking the tender skin.
“Promise me, you’ll be here when I get back,” I demanded, forcing her head back and she nodded. “Say it.”
“I promise,” she panted, her eyes glazed, and her lips puffy and glistening. I took her mouth again, desperate as I stood, lifting her with me, and she wrapped her legs around me. I rocked my hips into the warm crevice between her thighs and she tightened her legs with a moan.
“I
want you,” I murmured, trailing my mouth down her neck as my hand slipped inside of her panties. “Let me in.” Her legs loosened and I found the slippery folds, my fingers dancing over her clit as she whispered, “Please,” in my ear.
“It’s been too long,” I grunted, shoving her panties to the side and undoing my zipper. My dick practically popped out of my jeans and I guided it to her soaked pussy, coming to a stop at her entrance. “This won’t hurt the baby?”
“No,” she whimpered, thrusting her hips. “But if you don’t keep going, I might die.”
That was all I needed as I slid inside, the sensation almost making my eyes roll as I braced my arm on the wall behind her and thrust, forcing her to take every inch as she moaned, tilting her hips for me. I set a hard pace, thrusting as I tweaked her nipples, needing her to come quickly since I wasn’t going to last. She bounced on my hips as I pumped into her, squeaking when I shifted slightly.
“You have to come,” I demanded through gritted teeth, unwilling to let this be one sided. “Now,” I barked, feeling my balls tighten, and her inner walls clenched down as I heard her cry out and it was all I needed as I came, my body pumping her full.
“I love you,” I murmured, wiping tendrils of her hair off her cheek.
She blinked at me, smiling softly. “I love you too.”
Her words soothed the raw wound left by my mother’s senseless death and I buried my head in her neck, the hot press of tears forming behind my eyes. She cupped the back of my head, murmuring softly as I soaked the shoulder of the dress she wore. Her fingers scratched my scalp lightly, not demanding anything as the grief flowed out of me.
Finally, there was nothing left but a gaping hole, the edges burning white hot with the need for vengeance, and I straightened, setting her on the ground as I tucked everything back in place.
Grit coated my eyes, but my head was clear for the first time in months. I knew what I needed to do and I reached into my back pocket, pulling out the familiar phone. “Deacon’s,” I told Drea, giving her the code. “I have a backup, but this is what you need. Everything is on it.”
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