She walked through the halls of the accounting building, avoiding stares and feeling far too exposed though no one knew the baggage she was carrying around.
Pushing the door to the auditorium open, she half expected to find Kendal already working. The room smelled of stale books and mothballs, and for some reason, the thought caused her to smile. She took a seat on the front row and glanced up as the door opened.
Kendal looked incredible in his blue slacks and oxford sweater. He was a preppy bastard but did it well. How he and Damon were so close was a mystery to her, but somehow it brought her a little bit of comfort knowing that someone as good as Kendal was watching out for her man.
"Bethany." He stopped at the opening to the large auditorium.
"Hey, Dr. Tarrington." She went for casual, though there was something about him that made her want to open up and share her hurts - her heart.
He closed the door behind him and paused, giving her an odd look. She couldn't help but wonder what he was thinking.
"It's not Tuesday, right? I don't have my days mixed up, do I?" He smiled and moved up to take the seat beside her.
"No. I just wanted to stop by to see you." She glanced down at her hands and let out a shaky breath. "I went on a date last night with Philip."
Kendal's eyes grew wide. "All right." He leaned back in his chair and dropped his hands into his lap.
"And all I could think about was Damon." She pinched the bridge of her nose and shook her head. "He's not the right man for me, Kendal. I know he's not, but I can't get him out of my head. It's driving me insane."
"Love does that." He clasped his hands together. "Bethany, you didn't, you know..."
She glanced up, her expression tight. "Didn't what? Tell Damon? Hell no. He would kill Philip with his bare hands."
"No, you didn't sleep with this guy, right?"
"With Philip?" She rolled her eyes. There was no way in hell she would sleep with anyone for a long time. It wasn't fair to them or her.
"Thank God." He stood up and walked toward the stage. "He wouldn't forgive that."
"I know that. I wouldn't forgive it either. We might be on a break, but he still belongs to me." Did she really believe that? No, not really. It would seem things were winding down, but some part of her still wanted to hold on to hope, to dig her fingernails deep into it and not give up.
"And he believes that you still belong to him." He turned to face her. "He didn't hire Delilah. Kent did."
"How do you know that?" Damon had already mentioned it, but she wasn't sure what to believe anymore. Either way, he'd lied about it. Not mentioning it was the same as lying.
"We played golf together on Saturday, and I asked him."
"Was he angry about your asking? Did you tell him it was for me?"
"No, because it wasn't for you. I wasn't even sure I was going to tell you what I found out." He sighed and rubbed his forehead. "You two are acting like fucking children over this thing, Bethany. You're not a young girl looking for your prince charming, and he's not a broken soul who can find healing in anyone but himself. You can't make each other complete."
"Says who?" She took a few steps toward him and pressed her fingers into his chest. Who the hell did he think he was? Where was the Kendal she had come to know? "Love has the power to do anything it wants to do."
"And what does it want to do, Bethany? Save you both?"
"I don't know, but I can't hold on too much longer." She pressed her free hand to her chest as her face crumbled. "I'm hurting so bad right here. It feels like someone has a fucking vise grip around my heart and I need him so badly."
"Then go to him. Let him hold you and remind you how much he loves you. Stop fighting this shit and embrace it."
"Then he wins." She pushed at Kendal's chest as an ugly cry left her. "If he wins he'll never respect me for who I am."
"You don't know that." He gripped her hand tightly and pulled her toward him. He turned his full attention on her. "Stop speaking for everyone around you. You don't know what he has to say about his feelings for you or the reason he hired Philip. Maybe that was to show you that he trusted you to make the right decisions, but you're not doing that."
"I'm not a fucking puppet." She pulled her hand from his and walked toward the door. "Your class roster is on your desk. I'll see you tomorrow."
"Bethany, go talk to him. I can't solve this for you guys."
"I wasn't asking you to." She paused by the door and glanced over her shoulder. "What would you do for love? Would you give up your rights and become whatever your lover wanted you to?"
"Is he asking that of you or are you forcing yourself to believe a lie to stay protected from possibly the greatest thing you might experience in this life." His gaze darkened. He was pushing at her, and she knew it.
"Would you change everything, Kendal? That was the question."
He pulled his phone from his pocket and glanced down as his expression changed.
"Yes. I would change everything for the kind of love that promised to sustain me through loss and death, through fear and loneliness. There isn't anything I wouldn't give up for that."
"Not even your rules?" Her eyebrow lifted. She had him.
"Perhaps that's the only thing." He smirked and shook his head. "Get out of here and go mend what you've almost let get broken. It's not worth all that, and if I stand correct, neither you nor Damon have rules."
"Thank God for that." She patted the door and mumbled her thanks before walking out. Jake turned the corner and waved as he moved into the auditorium.
Good. Kendal needed someone with him. He was struggling with something that he wasn’t going to talk about obviously.
Bethany glanced down the hall to her left after holding the door for Jake. Someone that looked a lot like Damon walked toward the exit at the far end of the building. The guy hit the door hard as he walked out into the mid-day sunlight.
"Damon?" she whispered but stood frozen in place. It took a minute, but before she could stop herself, she was jogging after him. It had to be him. No one looked that good from behind in a pair of slacks. Was he spying on her or coming to see Kendal?
She paused as a large group of students walked toward her, forcing her to turn to the side to slip through them. By the time she made it outside, he was nowhere to be found. She pulled her phone from her pocket and glanced down at it expectantly as if he were going to call. He hadn't called for weeks.
After taking a few more minutes to ensure that he wasn't close, she walked around the accounting building toward the parking lot. Kendal stood beside his car with a dark-haired girl. Something was wrong, but it wasn't Bethany's place to interrupt whatever it was.
Was Kendal seeing the girl? The passion on his handsome face said that he was. There was something else there too... Fear. Loss. Terror.
"What the hell?" Bethany walked toward her car and tried to ignore the burning need to turn around and help him. She dialed Damon's number, not wanting to bother him, but needing to inform him that something was up with Kendal. It was his place to check on his friend, not hers.
"Beth?" Damon's voice was raspy as if he'd been yelling all night. Her first thought was that maybe he'd gone to a ballgame and had a good time, but that quickly morphed into him groaning and moaning with Delilah instead.
"Something is wrong with Kendal."
"Yeah, he's interested in the wrong woman," Damon barked into the phone, his voice gaining strength.
"I didn't know he was seeing anyone." She glanced over her shoulder to see the woman crying. "Something is wrong. Like, really wrong. I don't know what it is, but you need to call him."
"You go comfort him, Beth. You seem to be comfortable doing that already." The phone clicked, and Bethany pulled it away from her ear, surprised by his accusation.
Did he think something was up with her and Kendal? No fucking way.
"What?" She growled and got into her car. After buckling up and starting the engine, she called Matt and explaine
d the situation. He promised to call Kendal and deal with Damon. Whatever was going on, Kendal needed Damon with him. He looked like he'd seen a ghost.
"And why the hell would he run out of class when it was just about to start?" She pulled away from the curb before pausing. If Kendal left and his class walked, he'd be in trouble. Was he leaving?
She pulled back up, put the car in park and got out. The phone buzzed, and she checked it, almost expecting it to be Damon.
"Philip. What's going on?" She got out of the car and jogged back toward the school, trying not to sound like she was out of breath. Her worry over Kendal mixed with the concern that Damon thought something was up with her and his best friend left her heart racing.
"Just calling to see if you want to grab coffee later. I had fun last night. I want to see you again."
"Uh, yeah. Sure. I'll call you when I get out of class."
"It's Wednesday. You don't teach on Wednesday do you?"
"No, but something came up. I'll call you later." She dropped the call and walked back into the building, almost plowing into Jake.
“Hey. Kendal needs someone to take over his class. I was going to tell the dean.” Jake shook his head as if he were upset.
“No, it’s okay. I’ll do it.” She smiled and opened the door. “Come give me some moral support.”
“Always.” He chuckled.
The sound of the class having a good time reached her as she pushed open the doors and walked up to the podium.
"Good morning, everyone. Dr. Tarrington is dealing with something at the moment, so I'll start us off, and he can take over when he joins us."
There was a soft cheer around the room as Bethany forced a chuckle and turned on the computer. "Get out your accounting books and turn to page twenty-eight. Just-in-time inventory is our topic today. Get excited. This is riveting stuff."
Another chuckle.
She smiled and forced her worry and angst deep down inside of her. "What? You know you love it. Let's get started."
Chapter 4
Damon
“Unbelievable." Damon tossed his cell phone into the seat beside him. Never in a million years had he seen Kendal Tarrington look at a woman so tenderly. The way he held Beth's hands in his teaching auditorium left no doubt in Damon's mind. They were sleeping together. If nothing else, Kendal had feelings for the girl.
The agony of thinking that Beth would turn to someone else for affection was enough to cripple him, but it being his closest friend? Kendal was like a fucking brother.
Sweat gathered at the edge of his brow as memories crowded into his mind, one after one, each more fucked up than the last.
"Stop," he whispered and closed his eyes tightly as the sound of his mother's infidelities filled up his mind. How long would he have to carry the burden of knowing what she did? She was gone, and he still carried it around. The dark circle it created on the center of his heart was only growing.
Pressing his hand to his chest, he reached up angrily and pulled down the rearview mirror.
"They're not together. Neither of them would do that to you. Kendal would sooner die than hurt you." Damon dropped back in his seat and took a few shallow breaths. How quickly life could unravel him. He hadn't been emotionally wrecked this badly since the night he found his mom. He'd promised himself that he'd never again let anyone into his heart like he had his mother.
And now Bethany was there, and fuck if Kendal wasn't too.
After calming himself enough to stop shaking, he pulled out of the parking lot at UT and headed to the office. Whatever was going on with Kendal would surface soon. Bethany sounded panicked, but she also had feelings for the guy.
"No she doesn't," Damon barked loudly in the car and pressed the gas, scaring the poor guys walking on the street beside him. The battle raged within him the whole way downtown.
He forced himself to calm down as he parked at the office and walked in languidly. He nodded at the attendant and smiled at a few colleagues as they passed him. He didn't have all of the facts on Bethany and Kendal, and until he did, he was going to give them the benefit of the doubt. Not that Beth would grant him the same treatment, but it was irrelevant. He didn't have to react like she did. He refused to.
"Damon." Linda glanced up and gave him a weary look. It had been a long time since she'd called him anything but Mr. Bryant. "Your father has been waiting on you."
"Great. I'll head down to his office in a few minutes." He nodded to his secretary and walked into his office. After setting his stuff down and checking his calendar, he made his way down to the corner office where his father spent most of his time or used to. He knocked on the door and poked his head in. "You wanted to see me?"
"Yeah. Shut the door and come on in. I didn't want to talk about business last night at dinner with Matt and Karen. Everyone seemed a little edgy with Bethany not being there." Damon's father nodded to the seat across from him. "Take a seat."
"I have a meeting in twenty minutes with the CEO of Killinger. Just want to give you a heads-up." Damon unbuttoned his suit jacket and sat down.
"Where were you this morning? I thought you were having the Killinger meeting at eight."
"I was. I went up to the school for a few minutes. I wanted to see Kendal."
"And?" His father tilted his head to the side, studying him as he had been doing most of Damon's life. There was acceptance and love in his gaze, but expectation as well.
"And he and Bethany were knee-deep in conversation. I didn't want to interrupt, so I left."
"Interesting."
"I guess. What do you want to talk about, Dad? Beth?"
"For starters, yes. What the hell happened yesterday?"
"She had her fill of being treated like a child and walked out." Damon leaned back and crossed his legs. "Did you really think that hiring Delilah was a good move for us?"
"She's a strong accountant, Damon. I didn't think the ties you guys had as kids would come to haunt us. She has great references and-"
"And she's in love with me. She has been since we were kids. She hates her twin because Krista and I ended up together." He ran his hand down his face. "Anyway, Delilah has been after Beth since she got here. She knows Beth is your daughter but nothing else. She just doesn't like competition."
"Is that causing a stir on the team?" His eyebrows lifted.
"What?"
"Them knowing that Bethany is your step-sister and your fiancee?"
"She gave me the ring back." Damon reached into his pocket and pulled it out. Fuck him for carrying it around, but he couldn't help himself.
"What?"
Damon nodded. "We've been fighting a lot lately, and she gave the ring back. We're better family than we are lovers."
"And you're okay with that?" His father's eyes widened a little as he leaned forward and pressed his forearms to the desk.
"No. Not in the slightest." Damon stood and walked to the windows, finding comfort in the beautiful park scene just beyond the buildings. "I love her so much it hurts, but love isn't enough."
"Damon." His father walked over to the window and put his hand on Damon's back. "Love is always enough. Your mother and I had some rough patches, but love pulled us through."
Sickness raced through the center of Damon's chest and took up residence in his stomach. "Right. Anyway, Beth is probably better off not working here, but that still doesn't solve our problem with Delilah. She hit on me yesterday... again. I'm getting quite tired of putting up with the small things just because she's your pick for the firm."
"Get rid of her. Find a reason to let her go, and do it." He turned to face Damon. "And talk to Bethany. Her position with us here at McKenzie and Bryant will always be open."
"All right." Damon squeezed his father's shoulder before walking to the door. It was the perfect time to explain to his dad why love didn't work. Love was great, but without fantastic sex and loads of money to boot, most women would go looking elsewhere. Why would his mother cheat on his dad? He was
a great guy. The house was beautiful; they had everything anyone could want, and yet she slept around like a whore. Why?
Because the sex was bad, or maybe there wasn't enough of it.
Either way, he had promised himself years before that love, wealth, and sex would be the center of his relationship with a woman. There would be an abundance of all three, and then, and only then, she wouldn't cheat on him, or leave him stranded.
And yet something was missing with Beth. The money was there. The sex was in extreme abundance, but maybe James was right. Maybe he wasn't showing his love in the right way.
He almost felt too tired to figure it out, as if it were worth too much effort.
"Son."
Damon paused at the door and turned back toward his old man. "Yeah?"
"What happened with you and Bethany? You seemed so sure just before the wedding."
"I don't know, Dad." He shrugged. "I guess I'm just not enough."
"I highly doubt that."
Damon nodded and walked out. There was nothing else to say about it. Beth had chosen her path, and obviously Kendal was supposed to play some part of it. As much as it pained him to think that either of them would hurt him, some sick part of his heart was thrilled to know that she might end up with a good guy like Kendal.
"Mr. Bryant?" The sound of Philip's voice caused Damon's blood to boil. It was a total mistake to hire the kid back on, but it was one he was going to have to live with. He'd fired him under unreasonable circumstances, and HR had been quite clear that hiring him back was the only way to reconcile the situation. The idea that he'd done it for Bethany was only part of the deal.
"Yeah?" Damon walked into his office and dropped down in his chair. "Make it fast. I have ten minutes until I'm on a conference call with a client."
"I took Bethany out for dinner last night, and the whole time, I kept wishing that she'd see me." Philip crossed his arms over his chest and shook his head.
Mister Big Stuff: A Single Mom Friends to Lovers Novel Page 75
