"I know, baby. I'm sorry. I was wrong." He wrapped his arm around her shoulders. "I would take it back if I could. I don't give a shit what anyone thinks anymore. It's nothing but a lie anyway."
"So it's that easy? Just disregard the rules at UT and start dating a student?" Kendal barked a little too loudly. A few people turned around. He lifted his hand and apologized. "Sorry."
"No, man. Either tell her to drop the fucking course or stop teaching that type of accounting. Look at the options and stop pigeonholing yourself. You deserve love more than anyone else I know besides Beth. Fight for it, Kendal. Fight for it like life would stop without it." Damon patted Kendal's back. "We're going to figure this out. I'm not letting you mess this relationship up."
"There is no relationship." He glanced over at Damon with a sour look on his handsome face.
"You guys talk about this later." Bethany put her hand on Damon's thigh and glanced up at him, giving him a stern look. Only he could shut down the conversation. Kendal was too out of it to do anything more than react with whatever punches were thrown his way.
"Okay. You're right." Damon's eyes moved across her face slowly, holding her captive as if he had some sort of power over her. Sadly enough, he did.
The warmth of knowing that maybe not everything was lost between them caused her stomach to tighten. There was no one she wanted beside her, above her, all around her but the handsome asshole watching her so closely.
How did we let things fall apart?
She finally pulled her gaze from his and glanced up toward the front to find Krista turned around, her eyes locked on Bethany. Unsure of what to do, Beth did the only thing that seemed natural to her. She held her friend’s gaze, trying like hell to push as much sympathy into her expression as she could. They'd been friends for far too long for Beth to deny Krista anything. Her breakdown and not taking her medicine was at the core of what happened between her and Jake. Where some of it was her fault, some of it had to be blamed on her illness.
"I'm sorry, Beth," Krista mumbled. No sound came from her mouth, but Bethany could make out the words.
"Me too," she whispered back and blinked back tears.
Had the moment really come to have to get on the stand and testify against her best friend? Even with all the shit Jake had been through, he didn't want to see Krista put away either. There was nothing to do but tell the truth of all the events that they would be questioned on, but damn if everything they had to say didn't leave Krista painted as a monster.
Hopefully her lawyers would be able to bring into the picture that she was a sick woman and her medication was the only thing that kept her from snapping. That was their only hope of saving her from prison for the rest of her life.
"You okay?" Damon whispered softly against Bethany's hair. The warmth of his breath and the dark scent of his cologne left her feeling far too emotional.
She leaned into him, taking comfort from his closeness even though it was the wrong thing to do. "Yeah. I will be when this is over."
After the opening statements were delivered by the attorneys, various people were called up to the stand. Bethany chewed on the side of her cheek, waiting her turn as the sickness in her stomach grew. Damon continued to hold her as the morning progressed, but with each new testimony, the situation for Krista grew more and more dim.
"The defense would like to call..."
Bethany faded out as fear raced through her veins.
"Beth. They called you up, baby." Damon pressed softly on her back.
"Oh. Okay." She got up and walked to the front, ignoring both Krista and Jake. She tried not to think too much about how badly her knees were shaking. She turned and faced the bailiff as he held out a Bible. "Lift your left hand and repeat after me."
She did as she was told and took her seat afterward. Everyone was looking at her, and for the first time in a long time, she thought she might have a panic attack.
The DA started to pepper her with questions, and for the first few, she stumbled over her words, not able to think clearly due to the intensity of the situation. She turned her attention toward Damon as he smiled warmly at her.
Something about the calm in his face caused her to release the breath she'd been holding.
He mouthed for her to breathe, and she nodded, forcing air slowly into her lungs. Everything calmed inside of her, and she felt her mind clear and her pulse slow a little. Him being there changed everything, which was enough proof for her that their relationship was far from over. He'd come to support Kendal no doubt, but she couldn't deny the way he watched her. It wasn't his normal domineering glare, but something softer. The strong man that demanded life to bow at his feet still very much lay underneath his loving demeanor, but he was holding back.
He had to be doing it for her.
"Did Krista often miss her medication? I mean, someone with a tendency to go off the deep end and stab someone multiple times in the chest if she didn't take her meds would most likely make sure she stayed on a schedule, right?"
"Leading the witness." Krista's lawyer stood, and Bethany shifted her eyes over to her old friend.
The woman that sat slumped over with tears running down her face wasn't the girl Bethany knew. She was broken because of all that had happened. Bethany turned her attention to Jake, only to find him crying as well.
"I retract the statement. Let me rephrase it."
Bethany forced herself to pay attention. The trial would be over soon, and Krista would get the help she needed, and Jake would fully recover. The horrible event would forever be a part of their past, but everyone would move on.
We have to.
Bethany was dismissed much to her relief. She walked back toward the row where Damon and Kendal sat and moved in to sit between them again.
"Great job." Damon kissed the side of her head, surprising her a little. Too bad she didn't have the emotional energy to make more out of it than she needed to.
"Yeah, thanks to you calming me down." She glanced up at him, letting her eyes linger on his lips a little too long. Why was lust so easily resurrected in the midst of tragedy? It was almost as if she were searching for something to warm herself against, and he was the perfect fire in the middle of the darkness around them.
"That's funny." Kendal leaned around Bethany. "I've never heard a woman use calm and you in the same sentence."
"I kinda like it." Damon smirked and glanced back up at the front. "I can be many things."
Can you be mine again? Bethany forced herself to pull her attention from the handsome man beside her and turned back up toward the front as Kendal was called to the stand next. Funny how quickly true tragedy could put everything into its proper place. Damon wasn't the enemy that she was fighting against.
Their past demons were.
Chapter 8
Damon
"God, that sucked," Kendal muttered as they walked out of the courtroom.
Damon put his hand on Kendal's shoulder and moved his best friend to the side of the hallway to get them out of the rush of the crowd. Bethany wanted a moment to talk with Jake and hopefully see Krista. Damon offered to go with her, but she needed a few minutes to herself. He could respect that.
"No shit." He glanced around and turned his attention back to Kendal. "Do you need me to do anything else for the funeral tomorrow?"
"No, and honestly, not to be a dick, but I need some time at home by myself tonight. I appreciate you being with me for the last few days, but I need to mourn the loss of my sister, Damon. My heart hurts so goddamn bad, but I've been trying to hold it in because you're all up in my grill."
Damon smirked. "All right, bro. I'll take you back to your place and leave you be for the night."
Kendal nodded and lifted his lips in a sad smile as he glanced over Damon's shoulder. "I think you being here is going to melt her heart faster than anything else you could have done."
Damon turned to see Beth looking for them. Her long brown hair played around her shoulders, and the inno
cent look on her face had his cock twitching in his slacks. They wouldn't be getting naked anytime soon from the look of things, but he was okay with that. She was out searching for a new man to warm her bed, and he wasn't willing to let his old fears steal his focus on being the kind of man she wanted, the one she needed.
How many times had she mentioned him using sex as the cure all? Sadly enough, he had. For him, it was healing when it was with her. Being one with her left him whole again and feeling like he could conquer the world. She didn't feel the same about it. Until she did, he was backing off as best as he could.
"Good. I miss her so fucking bad," Damon whispered and walked toward his woman. "Beth. Over here."
"Sorry." She walked toward him and shook her head. "They're both a hot mess. I completely get it, but my chest hurts because of it. I wish I could take it from both of them."
"It's going to get better." Damon reached out and ran his hands down her lithe arms. "I'm going to drive Kendal back to his place and then go home and take a quick shower. You're still willing to have me for dinner tonight, right?"
Her cheeks colored pink, and he realized that his choice of words could be taken in several ways. The fact that she might be thinking about taking her time with his lower half left his body aching for her.
"Dinner sounds good," she whispered as she glanced down toward her shoes. "We're talking about us tonight though. If you're not up for that-"
"I am." He pressed his fingers under her chin and forced her to look back up at him. "I want to get everything out in the open and figure out where we are, Beth. I need to. You do too, baby."
She nodded and moved toward him, lifting to her toes and kissing his cheek softly. "See you around seven."
He turned and watched her go as his pulse spiked. "How am I supposed to get through a night of dinner and talking without thinking about seducing her? She's so damn hot. I swear she's the only girl that can turn me on by talking about washing dishes and having babies."
Kendal snorted, showing signs of life for the first time in days. "Then you know she's the one for you. Just be yourself tonight, man. If you want to seduce her and the moment is right, then go for it. Beth doesn't want a cardboard cutout of the man you were. She's not asking you to change everything, bro. Just the things that hurt her. Ask what they are and promise to work on them."
"Yeah." He pressed his teeth into his bottom lip as she glanced over her shoulder at him. She walked out of the courthouse and left him staring after her. "I'm not sure I can keep my hands off of her, but maybe it's foolish to try. I don't want to change who I am, but I can work on changing a few things or at least explaining myself a little, right?"
"Exactly. Get me home and go get the girl, bro."
"What about you?" Damon turned and wrapped his arm around Kendal's shoulders as they walked toward the exit door. "You going to think about what I said about Dana?"
"I don't know, Damon. It's not as simple as you think. She could drop the class, yeah, but she's still a student at UT."
"But why does-" Damon started, but Kendal cut him off mid-sentence.
"I don't wanna talk about this right now. I have to bury my baby sister tomorrow. I want to dive into the agony of that and honor Mandy as best I can with my speech tomorrow. We can talk about Dana after I figure out how to get out of my funk, okay?"
Damon nodded, wanting so badly to push the fact that Dana was most likely the best way to get out of his funk, but it wasn't the time. Just like he was going to have to do with Beth later that night, Damon needed to be himself with Kendal and yet tread lightly enough that his old friend wouldn't feel threatened.
They got in the car and drove in silence back out to Kendal's apartment. Damon parked the car and turned to face his oldest friend.
"I'm here if you need me."
Kendal nodded. "I know. I'll see you tomorrow. Go love on Bethany and remember, she fell in love with the real you. Nothing else. No one else. Fix this by being authentic, okay?"
"Yeah. Thanks, man." Damon let his head drop back as Kendal waved and got out of the car. How in the world would he ever make it through losing someone like Kendal had without a relationship like him and Beth were capable of having?
Simple. He wouldn't.
***
He parked outside of the apartments on campus and turned the car off. The need to sit in the darkness and gather his thoughts was a new sensation. He was so used to rushing into things like a bull in a china shop and getting his way. No matter what it was, or who it was, if he wanted it, it was going to be his. Where he wasn't sure he could change that about himself, he hoped like hell he could at least try and soften it a little bit.
Getting out of the car, he grabbed the single red rose he'd picked up on his way over to get Beth and walked toward her apartment.
He knocked on the door and took a step back as she opened it.
The blue dress she wore fit her like a glove, the top tight and accentuating just how big her breasts were, and the bottom flaring out and forcing him to pay homage to her beautiful legs.
"Wow," he whispered roughly. "I'm not sure how you keep getting more and more stunning, but you do."
"Thanks." She stepped outside the apartment and closed the door. "Is this for me?"
He handed her the rose and leaned down to kiss the tip of her nose. "Yeah. It's to apologize for when I stop behaving like a gentleman and slip back into being the alpha male that fucked you on top of your desk like you wanted."
She smiled, and he knew he was safe just to be himself.
"I wanted you to do that? I don't think so." She turned and locked the door, and he stepped closer and breathed in deeply, taking the scent of her deep into his lungs.
A soft yelp left her as she turned and bumped into him.
"I think you did." He smiled down at her and moved back before offering his hand. "I have everything for us to make pasta from scratch out at the house. You good with going back to my place?"
"Yeah, as long as you hear me clearly." She tugged at his hand. "I'm not sleeping with you tonight. The hell we've put each other through over the last month or so has to stop. I need to understand why you've done a few things you've done, and we need to figure out if we are still going to work on us, or if it's time to move on."
He tried to stop himself, but there was no use. He slipped his hand into her hair and gripped it softly as he leaned down and hovered above her.
"The answer to the last question is crystal clear in my mind, Beth. I don't want another woman in my life now, nor will I ever. We're going to work this out no matter what that looks like." He brushed his nose by hers and growled softly. "You don't have to sleep with me again until you’re ready to. I'll wait forever."
"No, you won't." She lifted to her toes and pressed her lips against his. The kiss was soft and tentative, and he left it at that. "I won't make you wait that long."
"I told you that you were the bad girl you pretend not to be." He nipped at her lips before moving back and taking her hand into his. "I get to lay some shit on the table tonight too. Understood?"
"Absolutely." There was no question in her tone. She seemed ready to lay all of their issues and problems on the table no matter how small or large they might be.
He walked her to her side of the car and opened the door for her. "My lady."
She got in and licked her lips as she smiled up at him. "What are we having for dinner besides pasta and you?"
"Not fair." He chuckled low in his chest as he walked around to the other side of the car. She might not want to sleep with him yet because it would muddy the waters and soften her, but by the end of the night, she'd be curled up beside him, his woman again if nothing else. That's all he wanted. No twisting reality or promising shit he couldn't deliver on either. He was just willing to open his heart up completely and let her poke around until she was assured of him being the right man for her.
There was no doubt in his mind that they belonged together. How things had gotten so in
credibly fucked up felt like a mystery. He couldn't even put his finger on half the things that had gone wrong between them.
He got in the car and started it, glancing over at her and falling in love all over again. "Let's start the conversation part of this night now. You go first."
"All right." She buckled up and let out a long exhale as she stared out the front window. "Why did you rehire Philip? I want the truth."
"You're going to get the truth tonight. Just ask your questions, and I promise you that I'll give you nothing but honesty. You do the same for me."
"Of course." She glanced over at him.
"I hired him for several reasons. The first is that I wanted you to know that I trusted you." He started the car and pulled out of the parking lot. "The second was that I had a guilty conscience. I shouldn't have fired him in the first place. HR told me to bring him back on board the day I did it, but I needed to think it through, to make it my decision. I'm usually a reasonable guy, but something about being your man turns me into a major asshole at times when I feel threatened. Philip threatens me because he's the right kind of guy for you."
"How do you know anything about whether Philip is the guy for me? You don't know him."
"No, I don't, but I know his kind. He's a hard worker, he's respectful, and he tried to help take the blame for you punching Sadie in the face. He's a good man." Damon shrugged. "I wanted to repay that after I calmed down."
"Okay. I'm sorry that I thought it was because you wanted me to be with him."
"I wanted what?" Damon snorted loudly. "Is that a joke?"
"Watch your tone. I'm super sensitive to you right now." She jerked her head toward him, pinning him with a hard stare.
He took a slow breath through his nose and nodded. "All right. I'm sorry, I just can't believe that you would think I would want you with anyone but me."
"Why did you tell me not to wear my ring in the office?" Her voice softened a little, and he glanced over to make sure she wasn't in tears. She certainly sounded like she was headed that way.
Mister Big Stuff: A Single Mom Friends to Lovers Novel Page 78
