by River Ramsey
I understand his frustration. I feel it, too. “You wouldn’t understand.”
“No?” he grits out. “Because I wouldn’t know what it’s like to be an outsider? To feel like my fate isn’t in my own hands?”
“That’s not what I meant!”
“You have to make a choice,” he says gruffly. “You have to choose whether you’re going to start living your own life or keep being a tool for someone else’s. What’s it going to be?”
I shake my head and for the first time, I see the anger in his eyes that everyone thinks defines him. Knowing it’s not directed at me doesn’t make it hurt any less. He backs away from me, like he can’t even stand to be near me.
“So that’s just it. You’re going to let him win?”
“I don’t have a choice. Try to understand,” I plead with him.
“You always have a choice,” he growls, grabbing his jacket before he stalks out the door. “You just don’t want to admit it.”
I cover my mouth as the tears spill. He’s gone, and I don’t know if he’s ever coming back. I wish he was right. I wish there was a way I could make the choice my heart wants and live with myself, but I can’t.
It was so much easier when I had nothing to lose.
Chapter 19
I return to the Alpha Lord’s estate before my father can send the guards after me, determined to meet my fate—and my betrothed—with dignity. I can only hope that James and the others are long gone by now.
As soon as I arrive, three of the maids who primped me for the ceremony under Adam’s authority surround me, clearly well-adjusted to working for my father even though they were just as quick to condemn him.
“There you are!” Lori cries.
“And you look like a mess,” Krey huffs, scowling at my disheveled appearance. “It’ll never do to have you meet the General like this.”
“Come,” Krey’s sister, Vanessa, urges as she pushes me down the hall. Before long, they’ve run off with my clothes and have me dunked in a hot bath filled with oils I could do with never smelling again. I’m scrubbed, scoured and perfumed before they stuff me into another corseted dress and pull the strings as tight as they can. It’s nothing compared to the suffocating grip of the bars closing in around me.
In contrast to the freedom I found so recently in James’ arms, this feels like a death, but at least I’ll look good for the funeral. They push me in front of a tall mirror and fuss with the drape of the golden fabric that clings to every curve of my body. The neckline scoops low, making it clear that I’m just another dish on display. As Vanessa curls my hair, Lori sprays it down and Krey paints a line of silver along each eyelid.
I felt like I’d come so far from the days when I was nothing more than a doll to be primped and paraded out at ceremonies, but now I realize nothing has changed at all. Now I’m just a pawn in my father’s hands instead of Adam’s.
I close my eyes and take a deep breath. At least maybe if I behave myself and make a good impression with the General, he’ll be inclined to make a concession where Aspen is concerned. If I’m to be the General’s breeding stock, then maybe I can convince him that adopting the young pup will be good practice for motherhood.
The thought of bearing his young sickens me. I’ve always wanted children of my own, but I’d hoped that it would come after having the chance to get to know my mate. I’d hoped for a man who loved me and me alone, not an arrangement where I’m nothing more than a utility to a couple who’ve already shared a life together.
When the maids lead me out into the hall, the music playing feels like a death march. One foot after the other, each click of my heels on the tile brings me closer to demise.
The doors open and I recognize only a few of the many guests in attendance as part of the pack. My father has made quite a few connections, it seems.
Everyone turns to look at me and as I’m paraded into the room, I feel even more like an object than I did at the scenting ceremony. A few whispers rise above the others. Nods of approval.
“She’ll make a lovely second.”
“A bit small, though, isn’t she? I hope she’s fertile.”
“Yes, but those hips are built for the task.”
My cheeks burn as a guard leads me over to a large table where my father is waiting with his esteemed guest. The man is far from the elderly figure I expected, but he’s well into his sixties at the very least and the life in his cheeks gives me reason to fear he’ll live well beyond them. His white hair is combed back over a balding crown and his fine suit does nothing to hide the hunger in his eyes.
The frail woman next to him must be his original mate. One look into her glassy blue eyes and I know that she sees me as an intruder rather than a means to an end. Omegas are rare enough that we’re scarcely given to an alpha who’s already mated, but there are always exceptions to be made for the wealthy and powerful.
My father looks on in approval, as if he’s pleasantly surprised his men didn’t have to drag me kicking and screaming. “General Harquest,” he says, standing. “Allow me to introduce my daughter, Lady Danica.”
“The pleasure is mine,” the General says, snatching my hand and rolling my fingers about in his unnaturally smooth palm. His eyes drink in everything the maids took such care to bare, and his pale lips press wet and hot against the back of my hand, making my skin crawl. “Your father said that you were lovely, but I was sure he’d exaggerated.”
“You are too kind, my lord,” I say stiffly, bowing my head. The woman next to him evidently decided she hated me the moment she laid eyes on me, so there’s no reason to fuel his delusion or her ire.
“Lady Danica, this is Countess Mariana duLoc, my first mate,” he says, as if it’s already given there will be a second.
“How do you do, Countess,” I say, curtseying to her.
She gives me a disapproving look over, her thin mouth set into an even deeper scowl as she takes a sip of her wine. “I know the Marok wolves have a reputation for savagery, but do you not feed the omegas?”
My father laughs good-naturedly, even though I’m sure he already feels the same about Mariana as she feels about us. “I assure you, she’s been thoroughly examined and tested. She’ll provide a fine quiver of heirs for you both, and be an asset to your pack. Won’t you, my dear?”
“Yes, father,” I say through gritted teeth. I’ve never known such humiliation, even at Adam’s hands. I want to cry, or run, or both, but all I can do is take the seat the General pulls out at his side and pretend to listen as he blathers on about his glorious plans for the civilization of our pack, and my father’s role as its leader. I know what he’s doing. Dangling the bait in front of him. When his hand slips over to my arm, it’s all I can do not to put my shrimp fork through the webbing between his thumb and forefinger.
“Say, what’s all this I hear about you harboring a hybrid?” the General asks, shifting topics.
“Ah, that,” my father chuckles. “He’s been here all his life. One of those undead bastards raped an alpha she-wolf and when she offed herself, he became the pack’s problem,” he explains.
I cringe inwardly at the callous revelation of James’ painful origins, which he’s never even shared with me. My heart breaks on his behalf, and the mother he’s never spoken of more than to say that she passed on some time ago.
“Well, if you want my advice, get rid of him,” the General says, guzzling down the last of his drink. “The last thing we want is the higher-ups finding out about that. Our job is to make this pack seem civilized.”
A burning inferno is ignited within me, and I’m not sure which one of them disgusts me more. I’ve already come to realize that there’s nothing of substance to the general besides his overgrown beard and the crust in his ears, but I never expected such cruelty from my father. “James has been nothing but an asset to our pack,” I say, ignoring the indignant glare my father is sending me.
The table falls silent, but the General’s obscene belly-laugh makes me
wish he was offended. “My, she’s a lively one, isn’t she?” he remarks before leading my father into another discussion about the neighboring pack they’ve set their eyes on.
Dinner comes to an end after what feels like a thousand years, and the General rises not a moment too soon. “Well, Danica, what do you say you and I take a walk to get better acquainted?”
I’d rather take a long walk off a short cliff, but before I can answer, my father cuts in. “Actually, General, I was hoping that you and I might discuss the logistics of my becoming the new Alpha Lord. There are customs and traditions the pack follows, and trivial though they may be, I think adhering to them would go a long way toward making the transition a smooth one.”
The General looks forlornly at me, his tongue peeking out through his lips like a snake’s as he finally nods. “Yes, alright. Another time,” he says, patting my hand. I’ve never been more relieved to see someone walk away, but I know it’s only a little while before his noxious presence will be inescapable.
The Countess leaves without a word and goes off to find herself another drink. Not that I can blame her. If I’d had to live with a man like the General for the last forty plus years, I’d be bitter, too. Still, getting to know her has convinced me that trying to bring Aspen would do him no favors. The crushing realization makes this night even grimmer.
I walk out onto the balcony, desperate for air even though it does nothing to refresh my spirit. My chest feels tight and raw, like something is clamped around it. I grip the railing and try to convince myself that perhaps some good will come out of all this when I hear the sound of voices coming from below.
My father and the general are conversing in the garden and if I stop breathing, I can hear just well enough to make out what they’re saying.
“You know where I stand, Ryland,” the General says impatiently, fondling the oversized ruby on his ring finger. “You hold up your end of the bargain and I’ll hold up mine.”
“So far, all I’ve done is hold up my end,” my father growls, his tone far less reverent than it was at dinner. “I’m the one risking execution if the King finds out the truth, and you haven’t made a single move that could compromise you.”
“I’ve spoken with you, haven’t I?” Harquest shoots back. “You could take me down with you if you were caught.”
Caught? What is he talking about? I crouch down below the lattice and ivy to conceal myself, listening closer.
“It would be your word against mine! A General against a foreigner,” my father says gruffly. “No one’s going to believe you’d stage a coup against the King you’ve been championing since his infancy.”
Harquest stares thoughtfully at his ring, taking his sweet time answering while I’m still struggling to believe I’m not having some bizarre nightmare. Is my father actually plotting treason? “King Albien will not be our biggest obstacle. Once the other two outland packs are assimilated under your rule, my men will feel comfortable backing the secession.”
“So you say,” my father spits, pacing. “You’ve yet to even give me a name.”
“In time, Ryland.”
“No,” he growls, coming to a stop directly in front of the general. “You give me a name now or we’re through. I handed my own pack to you on a silver platter, along with my daughter, and I’m not going to continue doing your dirty work until you give me something in good faith.”
I cover my mouth to hold back the sob in my throat. Mace was telling the truth the first time. My father is guilty of treason. He’s the one who led Eternus to our door, and now he’s declared himself our savior. My heartbreak has barely sunk in when Harquest delivers the final blow.
“Daughter,” he scoffs. “What was that crack you made about not letting my ‘grubby hands’ touch her if she was your own flesh and blood, eh?”
My father’s face falls, but the fact that he doesn’t deny it is damning. Soul-crushing. “So my men have loose lips. I was pissed at you for leading me on all these months,” he growls. “But I’ve kept my word and I expect you to do the same.”
“Fine,” Harquest mutters. “You want a name? How’s Lindon?”
“Lindon?” The name means nothing to me, but it changes my father’s tune immediately. I’m still reeling from the bewildering assertion that he isn’t really my father at all, and I can’t let myself dwell on it now or I know the grief will give me away. “You mean to tell me that Sir Lindon is on your side?”
“The boy king’s uncle,” he sneers. “Is that good enough for you?”
“If you’re telling the truth, then it’s a start,” my father says, stroking his beard.
“I can give you all the proof you need. I’ll have him on the phone by morning.” The General leans in. “And I expect something in return, because he’s not going to be happy about it at this stage in the game.”
“Fine,” my father grunts with a dismissive wave of his hand. “Take the girl out for a spin, just don’t come whining to me when that bitch of yours catches you.”
My revulsion is outweighed only by my grief. I’ve heard enough. More than enough. I run back into the mansion and don’t stop until I’ve reached the front door. From there, I realize there’s nowhere I can go within the pack territory that will be far enough, but I’m in no state of mind to plot an escape that won’t end with my imprisonment in the hands of that vile beast my father’s sold me to.
No. Not my father, but the truth leaves too many unanswered questions for my fractured mind. All I know to do is run to the one person I can think of who I haven’t already lost.
Christopher isn’t home when I arrive, and I don’t dare check to see if James is. I wanted him to leave. I practically begged him to, but I know that walking into that empty house now is going to break me. As it is, the only way I’m staying together is because nothing has brushed against the shattered pieces hard enough to send them apart yet.
With nothing left to grasp onto, I return to Mace’s apartment and grab the bag I packed. Aspen is staying with Liza now and I have half a mind of taking him with me, but I know there’s too great of a chance that I’ll be caught. If I am, I wouldn’t put it past the General or my traitorous father to hurt him just to punish me. The thought of his face when he realizes I’ve broken my promise will make me abandon the courage it will take to run if I let it, but something in my top drawer catches my eye as I throw the last of the clothes inside into my already overstuffed bag.
It’s a locket. A simple golden trinket with the royal crest of Eternus engraved on the front. I open it up to reveal a small picture nested in the circular rim. The picture is in color, but it’s so faded that I can barely tell. Nonetheless, there’s enough detail in the three faces pictured that I can make them all out perfectly. There’s an elegant-looking man in a suit of formal wear with royal tassels hanging from his broad shoulders, and the gorgeous brunette next to him is holding a small infant clothed in a golden christening dress. The infant in her arms is what draws my attention. I don’t know the man or the woman in the picture, but I know her.
It’s me.
Chapter 20
The sound of the door falling shut makes me jump. I grab the locket and stuff it into my pocket, creeping toward the door to listen. Did my father know I was listening? My heart is racing a mile a minute, but I calm down enough to hear two men arguing in whispered voices.
“She’s not here?”
“I smell her… she must be.”
Christopher. My heart jumps and I throw open the door to find him and James in Mace’s living room with an empty bag. They look like they just got caught breaking in, which… fair enough.
“What are you doing here?” I ask, hugging both of them.
There’s still a lot left unsaid between me and James. And me and Christopher, for that matter, but I’m too relieved to see them.
“We came to get you,” James says, frowning. “And your stuff, but I see you beat us to it.” His gaze lands on the packed bag hanging on my shoulder. It trav
els up, meeting mine hopefully. “You changed your mind?”
I try to answer him, but instead, it comes out as a strangled sob. James is the first to take me into his arms and he tries to comfort me, as if I didn’t just hurt him deeply after he confessed his love for me. I finally manage to calm down enough to explain everything I overheard between my father—using the term loosely—and the General.
The bewildered look James and Christopher exchange reassures me that neither of them had any idea, beyond the instinct to get me as far away from the General as possible. I wish I’d listened. I wish I hadn’t come so close to forfeiting my life for a man who’s been lying to me for all of it.
They should say, “We told you so.” They should be glad they’re finally proven right. Instead, they both listen in stunned silence, and once I’m finished, even Christopher takes me into his arms and holds me tightly.
“I’m so sorry, Dani,” he says, pressing a kiss to the top of my head.
I melt into his embrace, but I won’t let myself break down again. There isn’t time, and there’s more than just my feelings to think about.
“I found this,” I say, taking the locket out. James moves closer to inspect it.
“Who are those people?”
“I don’t know the man and woman, but one of them is me,” I say.
“Are you sure?” James asks, frowning.
“I am,” says Christopher. “That’s definitely Dani.”
“And you found that here?” James asks, echoing the question on my mind.
“Which means that if these people are my parents, Mace knows who they are,” I say, my voice shaking as I speak the unthinkable. I’m no longer sure how to view Mace in light of my father’s betrayal. Maybe he wasn’t the one who betrayed the pack, or maybe both of them did. All I know is that he has the answers I need and I intend to get them.
“So we find Mace,” says Christopher. “And more importantly, we get Dani the hell out of here.”
