by Godiva Glenn
Maybe in the morning he’d contact Iona and ask her about the strange pull. It’s like he’d been put together with something missing, and his soul thought it was at the bottom of the ocean.
A whistle from the water drew his attention. A fair-haired naiad splashed her tail, sending a spray that nearly reached. He waved to her but kept walking. Lights in the distance drew his attention, and he headed toward them, feeding his curiosity.
The scent of salty water and the unmistakable pungent aroma of a fresh catch wafted over him as he came close to a ring of fireflies with a man in the center. The lights dimmed for a moment then grew and a few of the bugs drifted toward Pavel.
He swatted to keep them away and heard a tiny string of curses on the wind. The lights weren’t insects at all, but tiny fae with glowing wings.
“My apologies,” he sputtered.
They raced around his head then returned to the man, who was bent over a pile of fish and cleaning them.
“Teall?” Pavel stopped in his tracks.
Teall flung a string of guts off his knife and lifted his head. “What are you doing here?”
“Walking. What are you doing here? I thought you lived down the coast.” Pavel glanced back over his shoulder. “Unless I got turned around?”
“I moved.” Teall tossed the gutted fish aside and lifted the next into his lap. “Obviously, not far enough.”
“Sorry. I didn’t come to fight. I’ll leave you.” Pavel took a few steps, then paused. “Unless…”
Teall sighed heavily. “Stay.”
Pavel nodded to himself. Something told him that he and Teall had more in common than he’d previously been willing to admit.
Twenty-Five
Teall
After washing his hands, Teall had dug an earthen jar of dark liquor from the sand and tossed it to Pavel. They drank in silence at first, swallowing the spicy drink and setting their throats on fire to break down the wall between them. The pixies that had been crowding him had moved along once he covered the fish, taking with them their annoying glow and high-pitched chatter.
It left them in the dark, though Teall could see much better than Pavel, he was certain. Pavel’s mood was a bit of a mystery to Teall, but it was clear on his face and in his willingness to sit under the shallow light of the moon with a guy he didn’t really like. He may as well have worn a sign declaring that he was lost and confused. Teall could take a guess, but it had to take more than a bit of jealousy to have Pavel wandering the dark alone.
“You can’t join them,” Teall said finally.
“I don’t want to talk about it.”
Teall shook the jar, listening to the liquid slosh. “Drink more, then.”
Pavel groaned. “This doesn’t make me want to talk. It sort of makes me want to dance, though.”
“Ugh. Dancing.” Teall took a deep swig and wiped his mouth on the back of his hand. “I lost to a human who dances.”
“You lost to yourself. Because you were a colossal dick.” Pavel rubbed his temples and glanced over at Teall. “I mean…”
“I know.”
“But why?”
Teall set the heavy container down and shoved it across the sand to Pavel. “Why what?”
“Why did you act like a tool if you knew it was driving her away? I feel like… most men, they see the constant fighting and they try to make it better, not worse.” Pavel lifted the jar reluctantly and grimaced as he drank.
Teall blew out a breath and licked his lips, which were burning from the harsh liquor. “I don’t know.”
“You know. You’ve had enough time to think about it, and you aren’t an idiot. You know. You love her more than anything, so why?”
“Truth?” Teall rubbed his tingling lower lip against the nail of his thumb. “It’s embarrassing.” He gazed over the water. The rippling surface sang a song that distracted him for a moment. “Did you know my grandmother was a naiad?”
Pavel sputtered and coughed, sending spit and liquor down his chin and the front of his shirt. “No? I mean… but what’s that got to do with anything?”
“I always wondered if it diluted my blood. Made me less compared to other selkies,” Teall admitted. “And when I met Annika, a notion hit me, that I wasn’t good enough for her. That she was this amazing, bright star, and I was a mutt.”
“She never mentioned it, nor Cam. Must not have mattered to them.”
“I know.” Teall ran a hand through his hair and looked at Pavel. “It’s damned annoying to have a problem and know it’s all in your head, but have it still ruin everything.”
“You mean to say that you were an ass because you thought Annika was too good for you?” Pavel gaped at Teall. “That’s entirely mad. It makes no sense.”
Teall nodded and motioned for the jar, which Pavel passed over. “I mistook the constant fighting that we did for passion. Fire. It felt alive, and we always went back for more, so wasn’t it working? Then it helped her to keep from pining over Cam, and I…”
“I thought naiads don’t get jealous.”
Teall tapped his nose then pointed to Pavel. “Exactly. Which only added to my distress. Something was wrong with me, and I didn’t want her to notice.”
“Wow.” Pavel stared at Teall. “You’re insane. You pushed Annika away and picked fights with her, all to keep her around and distract her from seeing that you were insecure? Did it ever occur to you that she was exactly the woman to help you with your flaws?”
“Once she was gone, yes. When her absence forced me to identify my issues and take responsibility, I couldn’t lie to myself. Which is why I had every intent on doing better.”
“She loves you.”
“It’s a terrifying thing, love.”
“I never found it to be.”
“I suppose that’s another one of my problems, then. What I felt for her, what I still feel, seems wild. Uncontrollable. We’d fight and make up and it felt like a self-sustaining cycle. I could give in to my emotions in these sharp, quick bursts.” He shook his head and laughed. “At the time I thought I was doing exactly what I was supposed to do. Now I see it for the insanity it was, but it’s too late.”
Pavel sighed and looked away. “I get that, actually. She has a way of making me crazy, too.”
“True love doesn’t hit selkies often. All across Prism, true love has magic. And I mean real, tangible, consequences and benefits magic.” Teall took a deep drink and passed the liquor back. “Most fae can access true love, but not the water fae.”
“Why not?”
“I don’t know. Fate always finds a way to put lovers together, but for those of us whose first love is the ocean, maybe that’s supposed to be enough. When we find our soul mates, they rarely survive.”
Pavel’s brow wrinkled. “Because in the past, they found them with humans?”
“And the water took them. It gives and takes. Many of the water fae don’t seek love. They seek companionship. But mortals always seek love.”
“Ah. That would put a damper on things.”
“When the rift re-opened and Iona was there to see me through to find Annika, I thought it was fate. I thought my true love for her had paved the way to finding her again, and that I would bring her back and we’d visit the fire together.” He closed his eyes as the confession spilled out. “Clearly, I was mistaken.”
“What do you mean by ‘the fire,’ again? I’ve heard it before but I’m not sure what it is.”
“A firepit, really. Special only because it’s where we gather when selkies have great news.”
“Like a wedding?”
“Yes. You’ll see it someday, I’m sure. Annika isn’t like most selkies. She always wanted to go to the fire.”
“I see.” Pavel squinted into the bottle. “But if you’re so sure your love is true love, do you think the whatever—the magic in the air or however it works—do you think it’ll let you be lonely?”
Teall shrugged. “You’ve heard enough fairy tales, haven’t y
ou? For every happily-ever-after, there’s someone who dies a horrid death or is cursed for eternity. The reality is that magic isn’t a bountiful solvent.”
“Do you think you’re cursed, then?”
“Nothing so dire.”
“To jump-start the whole… fate and true love magic, what does that take?” Pavel gazed at the water.
Teall followed his focus. “Sacrifice, perhaps. We used to call on the aspects or deities, but they aren’t around to hear our pleas.”
“Iona?”
“I suppose.”
Pavel stood, dropping the bottle into the sand. On shaky legs, he walked down to the incoming tide. Teall watched. Humans couldn’t handle their drink. If need be, he’d step in and keep Pavel from drowning, but he wasn’t concerned. Pavel wasn’t a fool.
“Iona!” Pavel screamed.
Or maybe he was a fool. Teall rose to his feet and stomped down to join Pavel. “Come on, now.”
“Iona!” Pavel stumbled further into the rising water until it splashed around his knees. “I know you’re out there! You’re always out there! Always around!”
Teall grabbed Pavel’s arm. “Hey. This isn’t what I meant.”
“She’s listening,” Pavel insisted. His wild eyes tore from Teall and he scanned the waves. “Why don’t you ever respond? Why do you ignore me?”
Teall yanked on Pavel, but he twisted away and fell down. Teall reached for his arm again but Pavel shoved him away and kicked off into the water.
“Iona! Why am I empty inside?” Pavel sobbed as he bobbed further from the shore.
Teall dived into the current and made his way to where he’d seen Pavel last, but found nothing. He rose to the surface and whipped his head around, searching for an indicator of where Pavel had gone. He went under again and saw nothing but felt a cool stream of magic brush past his ankles. Iona had been here.
Twenty-Six
Annika
“Annika!”
The repeated call of her name traveled through the water and vibrated against her eardrums. She nudged at Cam’s side and they both broke free of the game of chase they’d been playing with their cousins. Her head broke the surface and she saw Teall wading nearby. He wrapped his silver skin around himself and entered the water, her name still echoing in the air.
“What’s going on?” Cam asked, communicating through low chirps.
“Not sure.”
They swam forward and met up with Teall, who immediately turned and sped away.
“Follow,” Teall hissed.
They did, racing along the rocky reef. Panic and fear filled Annika. Even without knowing why she sensed that something had happened with Pavel. Teall led them to a shallow area and swam in a circle.
“He was here, then he was gone,” Teall explained.
“What do you mean?” Annika asked as Cam asked, “Pavel?”
Teall dived down and sifted through the pale sand with his nose. “He was calling for Iona. I don’t know what he was thinking, but we were talking about magic and true love… and he was drunk…”
Annika circled down and peered in every direction. Her heart pounded too quickly, leaving her dizzy. “Did Iona come?”
“I believe so.”
Cam started off toward deeper waters. “If she took him, he could be anywhere, but why would she?”
Annika shot to the surface and sucked in a deep breath. Teall popped up beside her.
“We’ll find him,” he promised. “Iona would never hurt him.”
“I can’t… I can’t breathe…”
He circled her, brushing her sides with the tips of his flippers. “He’s going to be okay, but wherever he is, he’s probably confused.”
She shut her eyes and nodded. Iona wouldn’t hurt him, but then why take him? Something had to be wrong. “What did he say to you?”
“To me? We only spoke of you,” Teall said. “Pavel mostly listened, actually.”
“Then why?”
Teall stopped. “He said he felt empty.”
“Empty?”
“That’s what he screamed at Iona, right before he disappeared.” He splashed the water. “Let’s find him.”
She took a steady breath and held it before diving down. Cam had waited, and now they all set out toward deeper water. They spread apart and searched, and Annika had to keep from imagining the worst.
What did he mean by empty? Why would he be angry with Iona?
They traveled further out than it seemed likely that Pavel would ever swim, not speaking, only scanning. The water grew colder, and Annika paused. She looked to her left and right and felt impossibly lost.
“This isn’t right,” she said to no one in particular.
“Iona’s magic leaves traces,” Cam said. “This way.”
They turned to the east and followed the gentle hum of magic that lingered along a circulating stream of cool water. After a few minutes, the magic dissipated, but nothing was there.
Annika’s eyes searched the water’s floor. “I don’t understand.”
“Maybe he washed up ashore,” Cam said.
Teall dragged his flippers along the sand and settled silt. The water clouded and brought the scent of Pavel. “He should be here.”
Annika dived down and dug in a frantic circle. Something brushed against her stomach, and through the thick disturbance of floating particles, she saw a hand. “Here!”
Teall’s skin fell away from his body as he took hold of Pavel and shot toward the surface with him. Annika followed, bracing one side of him against her furred back. They made it up, but Pavel didn’t breathe.
“Not again,” Annika cried. “Pavel? Come on, you have to come back to me.”
Once on the shore, they crowded around him. Though he wasn’t breathing, his heartbeat was steady and his skin warm. Annika parted his lips and pushed on his chest. She knew he had to spit out the water and breathe but didn’t know how to force him to.
“What do we do?” Her voice cracked and tears streamed down her cheeks, falling on his face.
Teall tapped Pavel’s cheeks, then gave him a solid slap. “Hey!”
“Don’t hurt him!” Annika pushed Teall away. Cam held her shoulders, but she didn’t want to be comforted. There would be no need, right? Pavel couldn’t leave her. She collapsed against him and pressed her lips to his neck. “You have to be okay!”
Pavel coughed beneath her and she sat up. She blinked through her tears as the men helped him up. She ran her fingers through his hair and watched as his eyes opened and focused on hers.
“I think I swallowed a baby jellyfish,” Pavel croaked. “Ugh. I’m going to be sick…”
Annika laughed and held him tight, her arms wound around his neck and pressing his face against her racing heart. He tapped her wrist insistently until she loosened her grip.
“I’m fine.” Pavel spit at the sand and cleared his throat. “Seriously. It’s not what it looks like, at all.”
“Don’t do that to me!” she said wiping at her eyes.
“Yeah, you shouldn’t make this a habit,” Teall said with a deadpan expression.
Annika stared at Teall. “You.”
“I didn’t do it,” Teall insisted.
Annika kissed Pavel on the mouth and forehead then stood and joined Teall off to the side. “You saved him.”
“I didn’t do anything.” His eyes avoided her.
But she had seen how quickly he’d sprung to action. How he’d shifted to grab Pavel when she was too distraught to even think of doing such a thing. Where would Pavel be now if Teall hadn’t come to get her and Cam? This was the Teall she’d fallen in love with. Brave. Strong. Clear-headed.
“Thank you,” she said while reaching out to touch his cheek.
He swerved away. “I should go.”
“Don’t you dare,” Pavel said. He rubbed at his chest and offered Teall a crooked smile. “I’ve a mind to kiss you for what you did.”
Cam placed the back of his hand over Pavel’s foreh
ead. “I feel we’ve missed more than a drunken moonlit swim.”
Annika had heard enough. She flew into Teall’s arms and kissed him. Something had happened. Something they’d certainly missed, and something that she was sure was bound to be an entertaining story, but at the moment only this mattered. If Pavel thought Teall was deserving a kiss, she’d handle it.
It only seemed right, after all, to kiss the man who’d put aside his own happiness for her own.
“I mean… maybe that’s enough,” Pavel murmured.
Laughing, Annika pulled away. Teall gazed down at her, but instead of pleased, he looked to be in pain.
“You can’t keep doing this, either,” Teall said in a low tone.
“But…” She knew what he meant but holding him felt right. She didn’t want to let go.
“Maybe you two should get a room,” Pavel said.
Annika turned to face him. “What?”
“I think he’s delirious,” Cam said.
Pavel plucked at his bangs, carefully arranging the wet strands to one side. “I’m fine. And while I was drifting along the ocean floor—which we’ll discuss but not tonight—something occurred to me.” He stood and walked to Annika. “I don’t think you and I are what we appear to be.”
“Explain,” Teall said.
“You,” Pavel said, pointing to Teall, “Are chaos. Cam is absolutely calm. And before today I thought that Annika and I were somewhere in the middle.”
“What are you talking about?” She couldn’t imagine what he meant, but his words sounded like madness.
“I’m talking about balance. If Cam is over on the left, then for balance, we’d be somewhere else… but that’s not how it is.” Pavel smiled and gestured to Annika. “You’re more chaotic than you like to admit. The three of us only appear balanced together. In truth, you’d cause us to tip. Like tonight.”
“She didn’t drive you into the ocean screaming,” Teall pointed out. “That was all you.”
“It was entirely me, but for her.”
Annika placed a hand on Pavel’s chest. “You need to rest.”
“No, I need to accept that you make me crazy. And the only way to stop that from happening is to find someone who understands that crazy. Someone who will hold me back.” He glanced back at Cam. “But it’s not you. You’re too caring. You’re the one who holds Annika back.”
