That’s when I spotted her. She stood away from the main crowd, swaying her hips to the melody flowing from the speakers. I had to give it to the person who’d put this all together. Only two songs had played since I’d arrived, but they were both R & B and not some sorry excuse for music, like the majority of rap. There were a few good ones, those who spoke about deeper issues than rims and fat asses, but it was a rarity.
Gabi moved her body, to the beat of ‘Unthinkable’ by Alicia Keys. Her long hair fell in soft waves over her shoulders, courtesy of Cam I assumed.
I pushed off the wall to make my way over to her. Half way there, Haikeem appeared in front of her, beating me to the punch. He leaned close, whispering something in her ear with his hand resting on her waist.
Reality smacked me in the face. Here I was ready to confess my soul to her, and she was here with him. I was preparing to move in on another guy’s girl...I was no better than Brooke.
Gabi nodded to whatever he said, and then he left. Turning back to her solo dance, her eyes locked onto me. She graced me with that beautiful smile, and then beckoned me over. “You came,” she said once I was standing in front of her.
“I said I would.”
“Dance with me. I love this song.” Without waiting for my response, she looped her arms around my neck and started dancing again.
I held onto her waist, and I followed her movements. How could a man say no?
The Alicia Keys jam ended, but we continued to dance while Joe sang about doing the things her man wouldn’t do, then Miguel went on about letting his love adorn her. Gabi pressed her back against my chest, and we moved in harmony to song after song.
My hands explored her, going from her waist and hips, to her hair and eventually with my fingers interlocked with hers. It all seemed so perfect. Like it was meant to be. Her in my arms where she belonged, all mine. My Little Red.
Fanning herself, she turned to face me then leaned close to my ear, her lips brushing it lightly and stilling my heart. “I need a drink.”
I took her hand and led her toward her the kitchen. After pouring a can of soda in a cup for her, I grabbed another beer for myself. I wasn’t exactly sure what happened to my last one. I then sat on the edge of the counter and drank in the sight of her. For as long as we’d known each other I don’t recall ever seeing her in a dress. But then again, we had been away from each other for quite a while and things had definitely changed.
The crème colored sweater dress gave her honey brown skin a soft glow and hugged her curves to perfection, stopping a couple inches above her knees. I let my gaze travel down the entire length of her. Old memories surfaced causing me to chuckle.
She crinkled her nose at me and frowned. “What?”
“I distinctively remember a certain someone saying she wouldn’t be caught dead in heels.”
She glanced down at her feet and laughed, beautiful music to my ears.
“In my defense, I was sort of a rough and tumble tomboy back then. But I actually started wearing them when I lived in Chicago. They aren’t so bad in small doses.”
“Yeah?”
She nodded. “And they’re super cute.” She turned her foot, modeling the black swede ankle boots. “I’m not so sure about this dress though. Cam talked me into it. I don’t think I show this much skin when I shower.”
We shared a laugh at her joke and I looked her over again. It wasn’t too revealing, form fitting and scooped low in the front, showing just a hint of cleavage. “It’s nice. Looks good on you.”
She folded her arms over her stomach, a blush creeping across her cheeks.
While she stared down at the floor I took the opportunity to admire her face. It was like I was seeing her for the first time. She never wore makeup so the little she adorned was easy to spot. It wasn’t exaggerated like I saw a lot of girls do. The nude colors and peach colored lip gloss accentuated her natural beauty.
I took a couple swallows from my beer, then went over and leaned against the counter next to her. Her heels put us almost at the same height. “What kind of party is this? What’s with all the slow jams?”
“It’s a mixer I think.”
“Aren’t mixers for single people? What’s a girl with a boyfriend doing here?”
She dropped her gaze to my chest and sipped her drink. “He’s not my boyfriend. We’re just…hanging out. He’s nice but I don’t see it going anywhere.”
I hid a smile that was impossible to fight behind my beer, taking a few more swallows then setting it down. She was free. I was free. Thank you, universe. “Are you going back to the party anytime soon?”
She shrugged and turned to face me. “I’m not really the partying type. I only came because Cam begged me.”
“So you’re going to stay in the kitchen the rest of the night?”
“I don’t know, maybe.” She poked her little tongue out at me and giggled.
I shook my head at her. Same ol’ Gabi. “Wall flower.”
“Whatever. Everyone can’t be Mr. Popular like you.”
That’s where she was wrong. Her infectious personality made friends easy to come by and with the dress she was rockin’ she could certainly have any man she wanted. But she didn’t care about any of that and it made her all the more incredible.
She stared down at her cup, swishing the liquid around.
My gaze slid down to her lips. They were calling to me, begging me to give them what was three years past due.
My heart quickened at the prospect of what I was about to do. Bracing myself on the counter, I moved my face closer to hers and I didn’t stop until our lips connected.
She leaned her head back slightly and parted her lips.
I took my cue and slowly moved my tongue over hers.
Man, she tasted good. Lips so soft. I took the cup from her hand and moved it to the counter beside us. Wrapping her in my arms, I pulled her closer to me, gluing our bodies together. Damn, everything about her was soft.
Her arms encircled my neck, her eager tongue dominating the kiss. With our lips moving together and our tongues intertwined, I didn’t even wanna stop to take a breath. I didn’t need to, she was my air.
Her hands moved again, splaying across my chest and then shoved me back, bringing the kiss to an abrupt halt.
I opened my mouth to ask for an explanation, but she stepped around me and hurried from the kitchen without so much as a glance behind her. It felt like someone had taken a big red stamp, marked ‘DENIED’ and slapped it against my forehead. Rejection, though a possibility, wasn’t expected. Fire engulfed my heart, burning it to a crisp. Why didn’t I just listen to my first instinct and leave it alone?
Fifteen
Gabi
Tears clouded my vision as I searched the darkened room for Cam. It finally happened. When Jay’s lips had touched mine my heart exploded in my chest. Kissing him was everything I’d imagined. Better. His full lips were cushiony pillows of heaven, and his tongue, dear lord. So warm, so delicious. The taste of him was far better than any ol’ cinnamon. He was simply...Jay. The most delectable flavor I’d ever had the pleasure of experiencing. It was perfection, until...
While I should’ve been focusing on all my fantasies becoming reality, my mind had drifted to the other parties involved. Haikeem, who had to leave early to care for his twelve-year- old autistic sister. Such an amazing, kind hearted man that I’d all but used. Correction, that was exactly what I’d done.
Then there was Brooke, who’d bitch slapped me after accusing me of trying to snag Jay right from under her nose. As much as I despised her, I didn’t want to be a part of the pain and betrayal she’d experience if she ever found out. The same that I’d feel if it happened to me.
Last, I’d started to wonder why he was even kissing me. Was his love for me as strong as mine for him? Or was he acting on carnal thoughts from the prior weekend due to my ploy to seduce him?
It was all too much. I needed Cam.
I spotted her in the corner, ba
tting her eye lashes at some guy who was big enough to take down a bull. She swatted his muscular arm, laughing way too hard at whatever he was saying.
I barged right in, not giving a damn if it was rude, and pulled Cam away.
She snatched from my hold, staring at me like there were things growing out of my face. “Gabi, I love you, but–” Her expression softened when I sniffled and wiped at my eyes. “Sweetie, what’s wrong?”
“Can we please just go?”
She glanced back at The Rock Jr. and pouted. “Fine, but you owe me a brain surgeon.”
I cut my eyes at her as we headed outside. “What?”
“The guy I was talking to talking to, Morris Gilmore. He’s a defensive linebacker. Full ride and majoring in pre-med. Neurology is going to be his specialty.”
“Fine. I’ll get you one for Christmas.”
Walking back to the dorms, I hugged my arms to my body, shivering. In my hurried escape I’d forgotten my jacket. No way was I going back. Once inside I kicked off my heels and dove under my covers.
The bed shifted and Cam tapped my shoulder. “You want to explain to me what that was all about?”
“No,” I replied from within my snuggly cave.
Cam ripped the blanket away and clutched it to her chest. “You can have this back after you come clean. What happened? Do I have to kick someone’s ass?”
I yanked on the blanket, but she held firm. Goodness she was strong. I surrendered and sat back on the bed with a huff. “Fine, Mighty Mouse.” For that I received a glare. “He kissed me.”
Her brows furrowed and she tilted her head to the side. “Who Keem?”
“No, not Keem. Jay. Jay kissed me.”
Her eyes bulged and she let out a high pitched squeal, bouncing up and down. “Ohmigod! Details!” She hopped onto the bed next to me, and I was finally able to get my comforter back.
I wrapped the blanket around my shoulders, gripping it to my body should she get any wise ideas. “He just kissed me Cam, that’s all.”
She scrunched up her face at me, her mouth turning into a frown. “That’s all? Why aren’t you happy? You finally got what you wanted.”
“No, I didn’t. He’s still with her, or have you forgotten?”
She reared back then waved me off. “Screw that bitch. She’s lucky I didn’t snatch that fake ass Pocahontas hair from her scalp when she hit you. Jay belongs with you and you know it.”
“Well I don’t want him. Not like this. He cheated on her, Cam, with me.”
She threw back her head and growled. “You know, sometimes I want to rip that halo of yours off and snap it in two. Geez Gabi, it’s not like he bent you over. It was a kiss.” She climbed to her feet and stood on the bed looking down at me with her hands on her hips. “Now march your giant self back down there and get your man.” She pointed at the door, fixing me with a stern look.
I flopped back on the bed and covered my head again.
She tried to take my blanket again, and I hissed at her. “I will cut you.”
She rolled her eyes but didn’t try again. Instead she flopped back down beside me. “I don’t see what the problem it. Obviously he wants to be with you and not her. For all you know he could be breaking up with her right now?”
Running a hand through my hair a bit too roughly, I sighed. “I don’t know if that’s entirely true, him wanting to be with me.”
“Meaning?”
“Well...you know how we spent the night at his parents’ last weekend?”
She nodded for me to continue.
“Well, I sort of, kind of, may have...tried to seduce him.”
Her mouth fell open before forming into a wide grin. “Perhaps that halo is crooked after all.”
I wanted laugh but wasn’t in the mood. “What if he just thinks he wants me because of that? Or what if he just wants sex, like friends with benefits or something? I want him to want my heart first. To love me, before he makes love to me.”
“Of course he loves you, Sweetie. Anyone can see that.”
I fiddled with my necklace, my eyes filling with tears. “Yeah, but is he in love with me?”
~ ♥ ~
After a long night of discussing the situation with Cam, we agreed that the best thing to do was for me to be up front with Jay. Tell him how I feel and demand an answer. He loves me, he loves me not. Either way, I needed the truth, so despite my knees shaking like Shaggy and Scooby, I made my way over to him in the common area of his dorm.
I was almost there when over sauntered Brooke and plopped down onto his lap. Was that his thing or something? Girls in his lap? She forced his head back and pressed her lips to his. The same ones that were on mine less than twelve hours ago.
I willed him to push her away, declare his love for me and kick her to the curb. After ten seconds passed I stopped hoping. My eyes and throat burned as I stood frozen in place.
I caught sight of Benji leaning back in his chair, watching me with his brows furrowed. He almost looked sad. He looked at the lip locking couple and shook his head.
Unable to withstand it any longer, I found myself fleeing once again. My heart burned from the bullet it’d just taken. How could he do this to me?
Once outside, I sagged against the brick building unable to control the heaving of my chest as the October wind chilled the tears running down my face. Pushing off the wall, I kept moving, not wanting to risk Benji telling Jay he’d seen me and him coming after me. Not that he would with his tongue so far down Brooke’s throat.
I hurried back to my dorm, hoping Cam was still there. She’d be my best friend now. I didn’t want Jay anymore, not after he’d taken a machete to my heart and slashed it in two. No, I was done with him once and for all. He wasn’t my friend anymore, and I refused to love him any longer. When I made it back to my empty room, I collapsed in a heap of tears, knowing accomplishing such a goal would be no easy feat.
I silenced my phone and hid from the world beneath my covers. By the time I fell asleep I’d used half a box of Kleenex. I hated that he had this effect on me. Only two people in the world could make me cry over their actions. My mother, and Jay. The latter seemed to be more often than not lately.
I woke to a setting sun and closed my eyes again. I didn’t want to face life right now, or ever. I wanted to fall into an endless slumber until my heart healed, which meant death, because it never would.
Against my better judgement I picked up my phone. It lit up as I did. A new text. Three actually, and six missed calls. Two from Cam and four from Keem. Tears filled my eyes at the realization that none were from Jay. It’d been almost a day since we’d shared the most incredible kiss of my life, and he hadn’t even called.
The phone rang in my hand, giving me a mini heart attack, which settled down when I saw it wasn’t the person I’d foolishly wished for. I sighed and slid the icon to answer it. “Hey, Keem.”
“Thank God. I’ve been calling you all day. I was starting to worry. Is everything okay?”
No, everything was irrevocably wrong. “I’m fine, Keem.”
“Are you sure? You don’t sound fine.”
The line went silent for a while with Keem waiting for me to speak and me dreading the inevitable. Things couldn’t go on this way. It wasn’t fair for me to continue to string him along. But I wouldn’t do it over the phone, I owed him at least that much.
“Keem?”
“Yeah?”
“Can you meet me at Angelo’s?”
~ ♥ ~
Haikeem was all smiles when he sat in the booth next to me, and greeted me with a kiss on the cheek. “Hey, beautiful. Sorry I had to skip out on you last night.”
“It’s okay. I understand.” I kept my gaze on my hot chocolate, grateful he hadn’t chosen to sit across from me where I’d be forced to look him in the eye.
He took my hand and brought it to his lips, kissing my knuckles. “What’s bothering you, Red? Where’s that smile I love?”
I swallowed down my nausea, tell
ing myself it was for the best, better for him in the long run. “Keem...I…I don’t think we should see each other anymore.”
He didn’t respond, for several long minutes he just sat there holding my hand between us.
It took just as long for me to find the courage to look at him. The moisture in his eyes caused tears to spring to my own. “I’m sorry, Keem. I–”
“It’s him.” His voice wasn’t angry, and it wasn’t a question. Just like Cam the day we met, he stated it like he’d known all along.
“I’m sorry.”
He let go of my hand and placed his elbows on the table, leaning forward with his eyes covered. “You have nothing to be sorry for. I did this to myself. God, I’m an idiot.”
I turned in my seat and waited for him to look at me. When he didn’t I placed a hand on his shoulder. “I don’t understand.”
He leaned back against the booth and started down at his lap. “I knew. Day one I knew.” He shook his head and released a sad chuckle. “I saw the way you looked at him, how you’ve always looked at him. I was a fool to think I could ever measure up. I guess I hoped since he wasn’t acting right, I could step in and prove my worth.”
“I never meant to hurt you Keem, I just–”
“Love him? Trust me, I know what it’s like. Loving someone from afar, hoping one day she’ll notice you.” Laying his head on the back of the booth, he turned to look at me. “You don’t remember me do you?”
I tipped my head to the side, searching his eyes. “Remember you?”
“River Crest High, first day of your freshman year. You were lost, a skinny guy with glasses helped you find your biology class.”
I sat up straight as the memory washed over me. “That was you?”
Excuse Me, First Love (College Daze #1) Page 15
