Hyde was very good at reading my responses and giving me more of what I liked without asking for it. I felt like a fool for suggesting we might have issues in the bedroom. How was that possible? I’d longed for him for most of my life. And apparently, I wasn’t alone in the yearning. We were bound to be explosive once we finally got our shit together and figured out how to be with each other. Things would really blow up if and when they ever went bad. I couldn’t see it going any other way.
Hyde’s hold on my ass tightened, and his hips lost their steady rhythm. His breath became ragged in my ear, and I could feel his heart race on top of mine where our chests were pressed together. My leg climbed high along his side, and my nipples tightened painfully into points at the continued friction between our bodies. My hair stuck to both of us as our skin dampened with sweat from excitement and exertion.
Hyde called my name on a rough cry and found his release moments before I did. The throbbing and heady pulse of his cock inside of me pulled my own completion from within me. I let out a soft scream, and my back bowed off the mattress as a rush of pleasure rocked me. I closed my eyes and let all the different sensations of satisfaction swamp my senses. If it were possible to drown in desire, that was the way I wanted to go.
Hyde collapsed on top of me in a sweaty, satisfied heap. He kissed the side of my head and lazily told me, “I definitely feel like I could fall back asleep. I’m not sure I have bones anymore. Or a brain. Everything just left my body through my cock.”
I laughed softly and hugged his warm body to mine, not letting him leave just yet. “That means we did it right.”
“We did it more than right, Remy. We got it damn near perfect.” He yawned, and I could tell he wasn’t lying about being ready to go back to sleep.
“Why near perfect? Do you think there’s room for improvement?” I was just teasing, but a tiny part of my hyperactive brain latched onto his halfhearted words and started to obsess. We needed one thing that would always be easy between us, and if it wasn’t sex, I didn’t know what else it would be.
Hyde kissed the side of my head again and muttered sleepily, “Practice makes perfect. I don’t want to stop practicing, so we can’t call it perfect yet. The more we get to know each other, the better we understand each other; the closer we get, the better we’ll be in bed. There’s always room for improvement. There’s nothing wrong with wanting to be better. It’s when there’s no desire to get to the next step that you need to worry. Complacency kills relationships just as fast as anything else. So, I hope we never hit perfect.”
There he went, being better with words than he had any right to be. It was a real honor that I was the only one who got to hear him talk this way. It was something special I would treasure forever.
“Perfect has never been my style, so I think our sex life is safe.” He would never know how much it meant to me that he didn’t ask me to be something I could never be.
Perfection was overrated, but being almost perfect on occasion was absolutely something I could give him.
Hyde
“HEY, DAD. IT’S been a minute since it was just you and me.”
I took a seat next to him where he was relaxing on the big back deck that circled the entire house. He built the deck for my mom for one of her birthdays, and it was a favorite hang-out spot for the entire family. My dad liked to sit out here and watch the sunset while drinking a beer, or he’d stand out here in the morning and watch the sun come up with a cup of coffee. It had always been his own little slice of solace from the rest of the world. I was hesitant to disturb him, but rather than looking comfortable and at peace, he was frowning and had his hands laced together in front of him while he rolled his thumbs over one another.
It was only the two of us because my mom showed up at my house almost as soon as I got off work today. She told me she would watch the baby and ordered me to sort things out with my father. I’d been out of town for a few days on a work trip. I didn’t have any plans to confront my father about anything; I just wanted to spend some time with my kid and see if Remy was free. I’ve been busy with both work and my personal life. I was still doing my best to juggle all the balls I currently had in the air, and I hadn’t let my parents be more involved in my life now that I was home. I’d really only seen them in passing or spent a few hours with them before I went back to work full time. My mom was a bit different because she showed up unannounced, and she had taken on a big role in helping with Hollyn. She adapted to being a hands-on grandmother with ease, and I knew she was doing her best to make things as easy as possible for me and the baby. My dad was more subtle in his support, and I realized belatedly that he was worried about overstepping his boundaries. He was scared I would take off on them again if I felt pressured by him or didn’t see eye-to-eye with him on how to live my life. I knew he had reservations that Remy was back in my life, and I knew he was concerned I was working too hard and trying to do too much on my own, but I was grown up now. I appreciated that he still saw me as a little boy who needed to be saved, but I wanted him to see me as a man he could be proud of now. After all, I wouldn’t be who I was today, as a man or a father, if I hadn’t had him as an example to follow.
I took the beer he silently offered me and kicked my feet up on the lowest railing of the deck. I’d been in the mountains the last few days looking at how erosion could impact several main passes this winter, and I was trying to evaluate a way to prevent rockfall and the threat of avalanches if the snowfall was higher and heavier than expected. It was satisfying to be back in the field with boots on the ground, but I sure missed home. Campbell was very good about checking in with me, and I think Hollyn was getting used to seeing my face over the phone, but it was still challenging to be gone.
“Sorry I’ve been so busy lately. Time got away from me.” The beer was cold, and the view was pretty, but sitting next to my dad and forcing myself to finally slow down and appreciate how far I’d come from the kid who ran away from all his troubles and responsibilities was one of the nicest moments I’d had in a while. “I hope you know how much I honestly appreciate all you and Mom have done for me, and I’m not only talking about Hollyn and bringing me home. I was only able to fight for her until the end because you fought for me so hard. You’re the best dad I could’ve asked for. I probably don’t tell you that enough. Thank you for everything you gave me, and thank you for teaching me everything I need to know to be a good father and a good man.”
My dad was quiet for a long time. He relaxed his hands and lifted one to stroke his beard. It was a familiar gesture. He often did the same thing when I was younger when he was trying to come up with the right thing to say.
“All I ever wanted was for you to be happy, Hyde. When you first came into my life, you were such a sad, scared little boy. You’d been through things no little kid should ever have to. I remember the first time you really smiled at me. It felt like I won the lottery, and every mistake I’d made up to that point didn’t matter anymore. It was and still is the greatest gift I’ve ever been given. And you being happy, that’s still the only thing I want for you. Working, raising your kid, finding someone to share your life with, all of that is the bare minimum, but it’s not living. Don’t get so caught up in building your life that you forget to live while you’re doing it. Have some fun. Make memories. Make mistakes. But most of all, be happy as often as possible.”
I chuckled and tilted my beer toward his so we could tap them together. “I was happy back then. I remember how weird it felt at first. I didn’t know what to do with it because I’d never felt that way before. And I’m happy now. Obviously, not all the time; that’s impossible. But I don’t have many regrets, and the ones I do have, I’m working my way through. Don’t worry so much about me.” I sighed and gave him a knowing look. “And don’t worry so much about Remy being back in my life.”
His gaze narrowed, and his mouth tightened slightly. “I watched you kids grow up together. I watched you prop each other up and tear each other down. Even when you
were young, I knew that girl was going to be someone who was in your life forever. Those Archers, they never make things easy. I don’t worry about Remy being back in your life, son. I worry about you choosing to make things more difficult for yourself than they have to be. Any parent would.”
“To me, Remy isn’t more or less difficult than anyone else. She’s just her; that’s just how she is. She’s the only one who’s always hears me, even when I don’t speak. She’s a big reason I learned what happiness was and still is. The truth is, I’m a single dad now. I’m the one making her life more difficult the deeper in she gets with me.” I gave him a goofy grin. “Plus, I remember you and Mom trying to figure things out when you first got together. Could you imagine if you walked away from her just because she made things more complicated, or if she left you because you came with me? We were definitely not easy to deal with back then. Where would we be if you two gave up on each other? What would our family look like? I can’t give up when things get hard. I did that once before, and it’s still my biggest regret. You taught me better than that, Dad.”
My dad finally grunted and dipped his chin in a nod of agreement. It was as close to approval as I would get from him. But I felt like he finally saw where I was coming from and why I’d made most of the choices I had as of late. All I ever wanted was for him to know how much I valued him, and how much I wanted him to understand that all the best parts of me came from him.
“Thanks for coming by. I didn’t want to intrude, but I’m glad you made time for your family.”
I laughed and set the empty beer down. “Well, Mom may have come by and reminded me that I needed to be a better son. It’s hard to try and be everything all the time.”
“Just be you. That’s all anyone should need from you, even if you come up short every now and then. You’re enough, Hyde. You always have been.” He reached out a wide hand and clapped it on my shoulder to give my whole body a little shake. “I should’ve come to you. You always come to me. When we first met, someone brought you to me. I guess learning how to be a good father doesn’t stop, not even when your kid becomes a father himself. I’m adjusting to you being all grown up. You don’t need me to guide you anymore. You seem to know exactly where you’re going.”
“I might not need you to lead, but it’s always nice to not have to walk alone. Go ahead and stick close by, Dad. I like knowing you’re there no matter what. Come over whenever you want. You need to get to know your granddaughter better.”
My dad cleared his throat, and a soft smile peeked through his beard. “Your mom wants you to leave her with us when you have to travel for work. She won’t say anything to you because she doesn’t want to pressure you, and you’re spending money on childcare, but it would mean a lot to her if you considered it.”
I locked my hands behind my head and leaned back so I could look up at the quickly darkening sky. It was easy to tell winter was right around the corner because the daylight hours were getting much shorter.
“I didn’t want to be a burden. You’re both still working and busy with your own stuff. I’m the one who got myself into a situation that involves a baby. I didn’t want to ask you to fix it for me.”
“She’s our granddaughter. In no way will she ever be viewed as a burden. I’m sure your mom would be delighted to adjust her hours to be home when you need her, and I’m doing more and more office work and less heavy lifting these days. I can do that from home. It’s nice to know we’re still needed, kiddo.”
I held up my hands in a gesture of surrender. “Okay, okay. I get it. I will gladly let you watch her when I have to be away for work. Campbell is great with her, but nothing beats family. I’ll talk it over with him when I get home.”
My dad also leaned back in his seat and looked up at the sky. He sounded hesitant when he asked his next question. “What about Remy? How does she handle being around the baby?”
I couldn’t stop a smile from pulling at my lips. “They’re pretty much best friends. Hollyn loves her, and Remy is getting more and more comfortable being around an infant. She’s still hesitant, and I don’t think she’s ready to be alone with her, but she’s very open and honest about her limitations. No one will ever be more concerned about how she affects Hollyn than Remy herself. She’s not like she was when she was younger, Dad. I’m not saying she’s perfect or that she’s totally different, but she’s much more aware of how her actions affect others these days. She’s very careful with herself and those she lets get close. She’s extra careful when it comes to me and the baby.”
I couldn’t keep the hint of pride out of my voice. I was very proud of myself for being one of the few people she trusted enough to be herself with. I still had a lot to prove, but I knew I was on the right track.
“Do you have a plan if something goes wrong the way it did in the past? I know what Remy deals with can be unpredictable, but we’ve all seen where it can go if she hits a rough patch. You need to be prepared for that, Hyde. I don’t care how much you care about her or even love her; there are practical parts of being with someone who needs a little bit of extra care.”
“I’m just going to be there. That’s the best thing I can do for her.” It was also the one thing I couldn’t do when things were at their worst. “And I’m going to stay educated on her illness, so I know what to expect and how to best help her. I was really ignorant before, and we both suffered because of it.”
My dad sighed again and pushed to his feet. “We were all pretty ignorant back then. You don’t get to be the only one to own that. We all could’ve done better. Now, let’s walk over to your house. Let’s get your mom and my granddaughter and eat dinner as a family. I know you probably want to spend time with Hollyn since you’ve been out of town, so we’ll make it quick. I bet your mom already has something ready to go when we get there.” He clapped me on the back and stepped toward the French doors that led back into the big house.
I got to my feet and waved my cell phone at him. “Give me a minute. Let me call Remy and tell her I’m back in town.”
My dad nodded and left me alone on the now dark deck. There was a motion sensor light, more for four-legged predators than criminals, that flared to life when I passed under it as I started to pace, waiting for Remy to pick up. I hadn’t had a chance to talk to her much over the last few days. She was busy finishing up a project, so she was working late into the night. Our free hours didn’t overlap very often, so I missed her and couldn’t wait to see her.
She kept her promise to keep her phone charged and answer any call or text in a timely manner, but sometimes she was abrupt and obviously distracted when she did so. I appreciated the effort she was making, so I did my best not to bug her when I knew she was working.
It took a minute for her to pick up the call. When she did, she sounded breathless, as if she’d had to run to grab the phone before she missed the call.
“Hello. Are you back in Denver?” She panted through the question, and while I wanted to think she sounded happy to hear from me, she still sounded like her mind was a million miles away.
“I am. I got back a little while ago. I’m going to have dinner with my parents. Do you want to come over later?” I was ready to spend some one-on-one time with her. She didn’t always spend the night with me when we hung out together, but she was in my bed more often than not these days. I was used to waking up to her and being able to roll over and hold her if I wanted to. Sharing a small hotel room with my coworker the last few nights was nowhere near as nice as sleeping next to Remy.
“Uh… I can’t tonight. I have to finish this project I’m working on. I’ll probably pull an all-nighter. But I’m glad you’re back. We can make plans for later this week or over the weekend.”
I was disappointed, but understood she also had a career to worry about and clients to keep happy. “Okay. I’ll call you later.”
She let out a little sound that could be frustration or exasperation. I wasn’t sure and didn’t want to ask because I honestly fe
lt like I was way more excited to see her than she seemed to be about seeing me. “Let me call you once I’m done with everything. It’s better if I’m not distracted.”
I huffed out an annoyed breath but kept my tone even when I responded. “Okay. I’ll let you get back to work. But I missed you, Remy.”
This time I knew the sound she made was definitely frustrated. “I missed you, too, Hyde. I’m just really focused on this project. Once I wrap it up and send it off, I’m all yours.”
“I understand. I’ll talk to you later.” I hung up the phone before I picked a fight with her or said something I might regret later down the road.
I knew perfectly well how hyper-focused Remy could get on something that she was passionate about. I had been the main object of all that energy and intensity for a long time. I wasn’t used to having all of her attention devoted to something else now that we were playing a key role in each other’s day-to-day lives.
I reached for the door to walk into my parents’ house but paused as an ugly thought hit me. So many things about Remy were different now. I wondered if I should be concerned that she was so intent on her work at the moment. Was this a regular level of commitment and drive to do a good job, or was it something else? Something that she might not even notice was the beginning of a problem. And how in the world should I broach the subject without offending her or destroying all the fragile trust I’d worked to build back? Did I ask her if she was taking her meds like she was supposed to while she was so caught up in work? Did I ask her if she’s talked to her therapist lately, and if there was anything her doctor was concerned about? Was I allowed to question her about her illness at all? I didn’t even know if it was something she was sensitive about since she handled everything in the same no-nonsense way. She talked about it calmly and matter of factly, but how did she respond when someone else mentioned it? Should I pretend everything was fine because maybe I was just being sensitive that she wasn’t as eager to see me as I was to see her? Was I reading too much into her recent behavior? Was I just jealous I was no longer the only thing in her life that she locked onto and threw her whole being into? Was I acting too much like she had acted when we were young, because that was the only way to show my love that I knew she would recognize? Would my worry be welcome, or would she feel like I was overstepping? After all, she’d taken care of herself just fine in my absence.
Prodigal Son: A Sexy Single Dad Romance: Book 2 in the Marked Men 2nd Generation Series (The Forever Marked Series) Page 18
