Tania felt like she was getting off of a merry-go-round. Her head was spinning and her stomach felt queasy. She wondered what other foolishness Mona had told Naomi about relationships. Tomorrow, she'd get all of her questions answered.
Tania sighed and dialed DeWayne's number.
“Hey sunshine, I was about to call you. Where are you?”
“I'm actually sitting in the hospital parking lot. My aunt just got discharged.”
“That's amazing! God is good.”
“Yes, He is.”
“Ok, so what do you have a taste for?”
“I'd love some good fish. Is there a place we can go besides Long John Silvers?”
“Ok tell you what, we'll drive over to Adily. There's a new place on the lake people have been telling me about. I'm about ten minutes away from the hospital, so I'll come and pick you up. You can leave your car there.”
Adily was a town about forty minutes away from Sweet Lily and was known as the Bed & Breakfast town. There was also a country store and a few antique shops there.
“Sounds good. I'll be here waiting on you.”
“Alright, be there in a few.”
After ending the conversation, Tania sat and thought about what Naomi said. There was no need telling her about what’s she’d seen Zack doing at the park, especially since Naomi already knew about his behavior. Would it do any good? Would Naomi be mad at her?
DeWayne pulled into the hospital parking lot grinning from ear to ear.
Tania smiled and waved as she exited her vehicle.
DeWayne met her on the passenger side of his hunter green Escalade.
“Hey, it's good to see you,” He said, hugging her.
“It's good seeing you too,” Tania said, squeezing him tightly.
Tania got in the truck and watched as he walked back to the driver side.
Just looking at him made the butterflies flutter.
“So what's the name of the place we're going to and how long has it been open?”
“It's been open for about three months now and it's called Hookem.” Dewayne laughed.
“Hookem? I'm honestly not surprised.”
“Neither am I.” DeWayne smiled.
“How'd you sleep last night?”
“I slept great,” Tania said.
What she really wanted to say was that she dreamed of him all night.
“So did I, and the best part about it is that you kept showing up in my dreams.”
“DeWayne, you say the sweetest things.”
“I'm not saying it to be sweet, I'm saying it because it's true. This is a dream come true and a prayer answered. I feel like God set this up.”
“I feel it, too. It's weird that we both have such strong feelings and we haven't been intimate.”
“That's how we know it's real, it's deeper than being intimate. I respect you too much to just sleep with you. Plus I’ve got to answer to God, too.”
Tania felt tears forming in her eyes. She'd never had a man say that to her. She'd always thought that sex was the reason why men fell in love with you. Those thoughts must have come from years of listening to Mona and Vivian.
“Why are you crying?”
“I never thought this would be possible. I mean, you see this type of thing on TV, but I never thought it would happen to me.”
“Well it's really happening, not only to you but to both of us. Tania, think about it like this, you spent so many years away from your hometown not knowing that returning would be a blessing. You didn't have any of this in your plans, this was God's plan. He knew this day was coming.”
“You're right.” Tania sniffled.
“I'm just as nervous as you are, but it's a good nervous, I trust God to be in this one hundred percent.”
“I do, too.” Tania leaned in and kissed his cheek.
When they arrived DeWayne got out of the car and opened her door and they walked hand-in-hand. He led her to the lake first.
“I want us to take a picture by the water,” DeWayne said.
“You should've told me so I could touch up my makeup.”
“You don't need any makeup, you're beautiful,” he said, pulling her to him and planting a kiss on her forehead.
“Awwwwww, you certainly know how to make a girl blush,” Tania said and grinned.
DeWayne and Tania turned their backs to the water and took the picture.
The digital image couldn’t have been any better if it had been snapped and photo-shopped up by a professional photographer. Happiness doesn’t need a touch-up.
“I love it. I want you to send it to Walgreens photo center so that I can get them printed before I leave. I want to get an 8 X10 so that I can put it next to my bed. It'll be the first thing I see every morning.”
“So you wanna see me every day?” he teased.
“Yes I do, with time.”
“It's gonna happen. I feel it.”
Chapter 17
Tania was happy, in la la land. She’d enjoyed her lunch date with Dewayne, which had turned into an all-day event. After eating fish, they went to pick out a tie for DeWayne for the wedding and then decided to catch a movie. Tania didn't get a chance to go by and check on her aunt but had sent Leslie a text to check on her. For the first time in her life she'd actually just focused on herself and she wasn't sure how she felt about it.
She'd always focused on her store and going to church, but now that she was caught up in this unbelievable whirlwind with DeWayne, she'd finally begun to come into her own in a very short period of time. She could barely sleep because he was heavy on her mind. She wanted more of his time but knew if she stayed any longer with him, her body would crave him, too.
Tania got off the bed feeling like she was floating. She'd heard people talk about a love hangover but that was mostly from people who had been in long-term relationships. This thing with Dewayne was new, exciting, and she was not going to question it any longer, she was going to go with the flow and enjoy it.
She looked at herself in the mirror and smiled. For the first time in a long time she actually admired herself, admired the glow, admired the fact that she wasn't frowning, and admired the fact that there was no sadness in her eyes. She took a deep breath and hugged herself.
The sound of her chirping phone startled her and caught her attention, and she wondered who could possibly be texting her at this hour. Oh God, what if it's Leslie with bad news about Aunt Jean, she thought.
With shaking hands and her heart racing, she grabbed the phone. Noticing that the text was from DeWayne made her heart smile again.
I enjoyed our time together last night and hope that we can get together again soon, I have an out of town run to make but will be back this evening, call me if you need me. Much love -D
Tania smiled and read the text again. DeWayne certainly knew how to make a girl feel special.
She got up and got moving because today was the day that she'd agreed to meet with Naomi to try to resolve her issues with Mona. Tania dressed and left for Naomi's house—the house contained so much history for Tania.
Listening to her William McDowell CD, Tania allowed God's presence to fill her car as she listened to him sing “I Surrender.” She was so filled with the spirit that she began to pray. “Lord, in the name of Jesus, I surrender my thoughts, words, actions and deeds to you. Lord, I belong to you. Lord, please be with me in this meeting with my sisters, and allow us to be on one accord, in the mighty name of Jesus I pray. Amen.”
By the time she arrived at Naomi's, she felt renewed and ready to slay her past one last time.
When Tania pulled into the yard, Naomi came out to the porch to greet her.
Standing on the porch gave Tania chills, and although Naomi had remodeled the house and painted it, she still felt some kind of way. The yard was well-manicured and Naomi had started a garden and had even added a swing on the porch.
Mona had given Naomi the house they grew up in because she couldn't keep up with the taxes and she could
n't afford the maintenance of it. The house was old and needed a lot of work. Leslie had said that Mona lived across town now.
“Tania, I'm so glad you came,” Naomi said hugging her.
“I'm glad I came, too,” Tania said looking around, noticing that she only saw Naomi's car.
“I picked Mona up. She's in the kitchen,” Naomi said.
Naomi looped her arm in Tania's and together they went inside the house.
Tania took a few deep breaths as she entered the living room. She took in the detail of the room. The layout had changed since the last time she was there. The old green carpet that was once there had been replaced with a plush wine-colored carpet; all of the furniture was a wine and tan color; and a 72-inch big screen was mounted on the wall. There was a huge painting of her mother in her Sunday suit that hung on the opposite side of the room.
Tania walked closer to the painting. It had been years since she'd seen a picture of her mother. She became teary-eyed. Naomi walked over to her and placed her arms around her.
“She's so beautiful,” Tania whispered.
“You look just like her,” Naomi said.
Wiping her eyes Tania sat on the love seat and took in the familiarity of her old house. Although she had been in town for weeks, she just hadn't had the courage to go to the house. Sitting there now had her insides jumping. She whispered a prayer for strength.
Hearing the sound of footsteps coming up the hallway, Naomi yelled, “Mona, we're in the living room.”
“Are you ok, sis?” Naomi asked Tania.
“I'm fine. It's just a little overwhelming since I haven't been in this house in years.”
“That's by choice,” Mona said, entering the room.
The sound of a blaring car horn startled them.
“Who is that blowing like a fool?” Mona asked.
Peeping out the window, Naomi verified, “That's Zack.” She flew out the door.
Side by side, Tania and Mona pulled the curtains back and watched their sister rush to the window of Zack’s car. “Why is he blowing? Why won't he come in?” Tania fussed.
Though their words were muffled, it was clear that Naomi and Zack were having a disagreement. He parked the car and got out to continue the argument on the sidewalk in front of the house.
“He better not touch her or make her cry,” Mona stated.
“Wait—has he put his hands on her?” Tania questioned.
“Naw, he knows I'd kill him.”
Tania hadn’t had a productive conversation with Mona in years, but now seemed to be her first shot. “Did you know that he's a cheater?”
“I knew he cheated once and she forgave. What’s it to you?” Mona spat.
Tania told Mona about seeing Zack at the park with another woman.
Mona ran outside before Tania could finish her story. Tania followed, hoping that whatever was about to happen wouldn’t lead to them all being locked up.
“Naomi, this dude ain't worth a quarter,” Mona blurted out.
“Mona, what are you talking about?” Naomi said and tried to quickly wipe her tear-stained eyes.
Mona demanded of Tania, “Tell her!”
Tania stuttered, “I saw him in the park with another woman.”
Zack called Tania a choice name, then said, “Who you gonna believe—your flaky sister you haven't seen in years or me?”
Naomi curled her lips inward. She looked at Tania, then back at Zack. “I believe you, baby. I-I'm sure it was dark and...Tania couldn't really see.”
“Like they say, we all have a twin,” Zack said and quickly kissed Naomi and got in the car. Later, babe. I love you.”
“Love you too.” Naomi blew him a kiss. She reached into her back pocket, pulled out a hundred dollar bill and handed it to him.
Mona said under her breath, “That better be Monopoly money.”
Zack drove off and left Mona and Tania looking dumbfounded.
A few of the neighbors had come outside to watch the spectacle, so the sisters walked back into the house to avoid yet another incident.
Once inside, Naomi gave a fake smile as they all sat on the couch. “Mona, I invited you both here so that we can get to the bottom of what's going on. I want all of us to take turns talking. Let's respect one another and do this the right way, the way Mama would want us to do it,” Naomi said.
“Wait one dang gone minute. I know good and well you ain't gonna act like nothing happened,” Mona pointed out.
“Mona, it's the day before my wedding. Zack loves me and things will get better with time,” Naomi said as if she was reciting an Easter speech.
“Look Naomi, I'm not in your business, but don't you think you should call the wedding off?” Tania asked.
“No, nobody's perfect, right Mona?”
Tania side-eyed Mona as she waited for her response.
“Nobody's perfect, but a leopard don't change its spots. Zack is playing you like a the lottery.”
“But...but...you told me men don't know how to be faithful,” Naomi yelped.
“Naomi, I may have said that and in some cases it's true. Zack looked like a kid who got caught with his hand in the cookie jar. You forgave him once, but he's not sorry—he's no good, and besides, you know Tania's not lying on him.”
Tania was shocked by Mona's answer and by the fact that she actually took up for her.
“I'm not calling my wedding off. You'll have to accept it or not,” Naomi said matter-of-factly. “I love y’all, but please stay out of my business. Tania, it's obvious that you have for some reason opted to stay away from us. Can you please shed some light as to why?” Naomi said.
Tania cleared her throat and glanced at Naomi and then at Mona. This was her opportunity to lay all of her cards on the table. No turning back.
“I've stayed away for as long as I have because of the way Mona treated me growing up. I didn't feel like I was a part of the family. I've always felt like an outsider. And I realize now that the reason I didn’t want to stay connected to you, Naomi, was because the child in me was jealous. Mona always treated you better than me. You couldn’t see it, but I did. We couldn’t relate—it’s like we had two different childhoods with the same sister.”
Mona snapped, “Tania, we never tried to make you an outsider in this family. You just always been weird. Plus I was just trying to even up the score ‘cause you always got what you wanted when Mama was alive. You were her favorite. She made sure you were treated special ‘cause of your pretty skin and all that long hair. She would spend hours washing, blow-drying, and putting your long, shiny hair in ponytails with pretty bows. Then she’d turn around and put my hair in two French braids on the side in fifteen minutes flat. Everything that she did was all about you.”
“All about me? Really Mona? We both know that's not true.”
Naomi interrupted innocently, “But, Mona, wasn’t your hair short? I mean, maybe the reason it took Mama hours to do Tania’s hair was because it was so long and thick. And she Mama probably thought that keeping your hair braided would keep it protected and make it grow.”
Made perfect sense to Tania.
“Naomi, you were too young. I’m speaking the truth. Mama loved Tania more than she loved me.”
“How could you say that, Mona?” Naomi asked.
“Y’all were too young and naive to understand what went on. Just like you and Naomi got two different memories of me, me and y’all got two different memories of Mama. Mama had y’all fooled.”
“Had us fooled? How?” Tania asked.
“Tania, do you really want to know?”
“Yes, I want to know. That's why I'm here, that's why I'm asking.”
Mona’s face filled with rage. “Your mother, good ole Ruby Clinton, let your daddy get me pregnant.”
“What?” Tania shrieked.
“That's the truth. Tania, your dad raped me, got be pregnant and Mama made me have an abortion. I was young and hurting and all she cared about was Tania, Tania's dad, Tania's feelings
, Tania's pretty yellow complexion and silky hair. Tania, Tania, Tania.
“When she died, she left her precious little Tania here for me to take care of. She never pressed charges against your father or even believed that I was innocent. She said it was my fault that he raped me. And every time I look at your face, all I can see is him violating me over and over again.” Mona hid her face and sobbed profusely. “It's a never-ending nightmare.”
Both Tania and Naomi looked at each other horrified. They embraced their sister like never before.
“Mona, oh my God, I'm so sorry. I had no idea. You didn't do anything to deserve that,” Tania cried because she knew exactly what it was to be chased down in your sleep by a memory.
“Sis, we love you, and Mama did too. She probably was just too scared and didn't know what to do,” Naomi reasoned.
“No, Naomi,” Tania declared. “Right is right and wrong is wrong. This family has made too many excuses for people’s behavior. This stops today. Both of them are dead and gone now, so there's no way we can demand answers. But what we can do is pray and make better decisions moving forward.” The words were flowing out of Tania’s mouth from a power deep down inside her that had been waiting for this moment to speak.
She turned to Mona and said something else she hadn’t known she could say. “Mona, I love you. I hate that this happened to you. What we need now is prayer.”
“Pray? Pray about what? That won't change nothing!” Mona screamed.
“Mona prayer can change how you feel and help you move pass the hurt,” Tania said.
“Please. Just listen to her,” Naomi pleaded.
Mona sat up facing both of her sisters with trembling hands.
They joined hands and Tania prayed. “Lord, thank you for joining us back together again. Sometimes in life, Lord, things happen that we don't understand. But we know that even in bad things, you can still work them for our good. God, I ask that you remove the bitterness, the hurt, the pain, the shame, and anger from Mona's heart. Lord, heal her mind, her soul and spirit, Lord God renew her, and make her whole again, realizing that our wholeness comes from you. Lord Jesus, touch all of us and give us the sisterly love, and bond that we should have towards each other. Lord, please allow this moment to be a lesson to all of us to forgive and throw away anything that isn’t like you. Lord, we're moving forward in you. Mend us, God and bless us to do what you would have us to do, in Jesus’ name I pray, Amen.”
Redemption Page 9
