The edge of his lip twitched. “Was that something you expected me to want?”
“Well, you’re . . .” I really hate this part. Negotiating with someone new meant talking about embarrassing things. She preferred writing it all down and letting the Dom read the list ahead of time. Discussing only what she’d marked as “uncertain.” But Zach hadn’t even asked Dean for her limit list. “Do I have to say it?”
“Yes.”
“You’re gay. I figured the only way you would . . . I mean . . .” Hell, she didn’t even know if gay men did that with women. But he wanted to play with her, so he had to be getting something out of it. “I understand if you’re no longer interested.”
He sighed and bent over, bracing a hand on the table by her head. “There will be no penetration of any sort tonight, little doe, but once we reach that point, I will enjoy your body, however you are willing to give it to me. If that is a limit, I will respect it. However, we will discuss why you’re not open to trying it.”
“I have tried it.”
“I see.”
“I didn’t like it. It hurt and I’m not into pain.” She spoke in a rush, not sure he could possibly understand since that was the only way he could be with most of his lovers. “That’s another problem, actually. Some Doms aren’t interested in a sub with no tolerance for pain. Not that I mind a light spanking now and then, but—”
“Shh.” Zach kissed her, then let out a light laugh against her lips. “It’s okay. That’s enough for tonight. I know you’re not comfortable sharing all this. But I will tell you one thing.”
She swallowed, her whole body trembling as she realized he wasn’t ending things and sending her off to someone else. He still wanted her. She dented her bottom lip with her teeth, hissing through them. “What?”
His lips grazed her cheek. He spoke quietly in her ear. “It doesn’t have to hurt.”
She shivered as he straightened, leaving her arms slack as he drew them up to lay on the table above her head, stretched out much like they would be if she had been restrained. He did the same at the bottom of the table with her ankles, setting them far apart, making her all too aware of how short the dress she’d borrowed from Silver was. Thankfully, Dean hadn’t told her not to wear panties, because the dress was snug enough to bare her to the hip with her thighs spread. Since she hadn’t planned to play tonight, she hadn’t thought to shave during her shower this morning. Her legs weren’t too bad, but she’d have been humiliated to show any Dom that she’d neglected to shave her privates.
If I’d known Zach would be here—that he’d want to—
“You stiffened up. What’s wrong?”
I did? She tried to relax. Zach had already decided on no penetration. But as much as she didn’t want him to see her unkempt, she couldn’t help being a little disappointed. It had been a long time since she’d wanted a man this much. A thought of Scott had her rolling her eyes. Okay, not that long, but Zach was the first one she wouldn’t feel cheap with in the morning. She had a feeling he—unlike Scott—would still be there when she woke up.
“It’s nothing.” She forced a smile. “You just have me feeling a little reckless.”
“Do I?” He chuckled. “Don’t tempt me, Becky. It would be easy to forgo the whole scene and simply make love to you, but that wouldn’t satisfy either of us.”
She nodded. “Because I’m a woman.”
His jaw hardened. “No. Because I’m a Dom, and I need to give you more.” He raked his fingers into her hair, tightening his grip to the edge of pain. “As you said, you could have had that with a phone call. I could have had it with less.”
Perfectly still, needing to show him, at very least, she could follow instructions, Becky wondered exactly what Zach’s relationship with Scott was. There were whispers that Scott would do anyone, anywhere, but was he really bisexual? Zach didn’t seem the type of man to take on casual lovers, but Scott wasn’t the type of man to take on anything but. Her attraction to Scott was frustrating as hell, because she knew nothing could come of it. How much worse would it be to be used by him when he was also a friend? A teammate?
Scott had been seen with more women over the summer than in his whole career. A different one every night. It had started not long after Zach had come out to the press.
If the two were connected, Scott wasn’t just a player. He was a coldhearted son of a bitch. He’d blatantly rejected Zach. And that had to hurt.
“Zach—Sir, I didn’t mean to . . . I didn’t think that you and Scott were—”
“Serious? We’re not.” Zach sighed. “Please don’t apologize. You have the right to know if I’m involved with anyone—I’d expect you to tell me if you were. Can we agree that we’re both single, that we both have similar interests, and that neither of us is interested in a one night stand?”
“Yes.”
“Good. Then shall we start? Do you understand what I expect from you?”
“Don’t move. Don’t speak unless for clarity or to safeword.”
“Excellent.” He gave her a slanted smile, then slowly circled the table, his hand moving in an outline of her body without touching her. “That dress looks lovely on you.”
“Thank you.” She groaned when he clucked his tongue. “Sorry, Sir.”
“Do you often have difficulty submitting?”
She shook her head.
“Hmm. I see.” He stopped by her side. Drew his finger up her arm from her inner wrist to her elbow. She twitched. Clenched her fists. “But you are finding it difficult to obey me?”
“No, Sir.”
“Neither safeword or clarification.” He smoothed his hand over her cheek. “All the Doms you’ve been with haven’t asked for much, have they? No, don’t answer.” His tone was rough, but not with anger. More . . . carefully restrained. “I’d love to push you. Challenge you. But not yet. First you have to prove you can handle this.”
She almost said, “I can,” but then remembered she wasn’t supposed to say anything. The restrictions suddenly felt more imposing than any gag or restraint. She settled into the sensation, relaxing because giving him what he’d asked for was really very simple. No guesswork involved.
The approval in his eyes was like a bright golden star bursting in the center of her chest. She inhaled deeply and held her breath, waiting to see what he’d do next.
He circled the table again, stopping at her other side. Hooking his fingers into the thick straps of her dress above her shoulders, he pulled it down, moving her as he pleased, taking one arm, then the other, until both were free of the dress. Only the neckline covered her breasts as he placed her arms. Her nipples tightened into sensitive little points as she waited for him to expose them, but instead he walked to the end of the table and traced his fingertips down the soles of her feet.
A giggle escaped her, and she squirmed as he did it again.
“Be still.”
And again. It tickled, but she pressed her eyes shut, ground her teeth, and fought not to move. His hands curved around her feet and she bit back a groan as he pressed his thumbs into her soles. He stroked, massaged, then tickled, alternating until the pleasure edged on torture. Yet, somehow, she kept still. Sank into a place where all that mattered was his touch. As it moved up to her calves, she sank even deeper, responding to his slow, even breaths, to his soft praise. She needed to know she had it in her to please him. To be everything he needed and wanted by doing nothing but what came naturally.
“I was right. You are precious.” He kissed her bare shoulder, then rolled the material of her dress down over her breasts. “This isn’t just sex for you. It’s so much more.”
“Yes.” She absorbed the satisfaction in his tone like earth soaked in rain after a drought. She knew she shouldn’t speak, but she had to make sure he wasn’t just doing this for her. “Am I . . . do I make you happy?”
“More than I can say.” He lowered his head to her breasts, resting his forehead between them. He kissed the side of one breast
and she shivered. The sensation was both tender and erotic. Lingering, building as he kissed his way up to her nipple. “Don’t forget what I’ve asked of you.”
Don’t move.
Pleasure speared her as he sucked her nipple into his mouth. Her eyes teared as she struggled not to arch up. As she pressed her lips together.
“No man or woman has pleased me as much as you have.”
He pinched her nipple between his finger and thumb as he sucked the other.
“I won’t be easy on you, little doe.”
He shifted down her body, drawing the hem of her dress up over her hips, over her belly, kissing the exposed flesh as he worked his way down.
“But if you are mine . . .”
His fingers traced the edge of her panties, along the sides of her pussy lips, close to where the material had grown damp. He bit down just above the slight swell of her stomach, rubbing her panties into her clit.
“I will give you what no one else can.”
The muscles in her thighs tensed. Pleasure curled up in her core, sizzling like a live wire in a shallow pool, electricity zipping across the surface.
“Come for me, little doe. Lose yourself. Give up control. It belongs to me.”
Becky opened her mouth wide and choked back a scream. She came as though he’d pulled a trigger, set off a spark which ignited everything inside her. A sob tore from her throat as she shook, her hips bucking, her core tightening and releasing sporadically, the sensation fierce even though nothing filled her. Nothing grounded her. And suddenly she needed that. Something to hold her down before she shattered.
“Come here.” Zach gathered her in his arms, carrying her to a chair to hold her tight as she came apart. It felt like she’d been torn open, exposed in a way she didn’t know how to handle. She shuddered, gasping as she curled into a ball on his lap. His dick pressed into her hip, and she blinked fast.
She’d done nothing for him.
Nothing!
“Don’t cry.” Zach pressed her head against his shoulder as another sob tore out from her chest. “Rest for a minute, then tell me what’s wrong.”
A hysterical laugh broke free as she lifted her head. Blinded by tears, she tried to meet his eyes. “Not for me. It’s not okay if it’s just for me.”
“It wasn’t, little doe. Believe me.” He kissed her forehead. “You have no idea what you’ve given me. And it’s not over. There will be more. So much more.”
“It’s not enough!” The tears stung her eyes. And she didn’t know why. It was so wonderful, but taking more than she gave felt so wrong.
“For tonight it is.” Zach kissed her forehead, “Come home with me, Becky. Let me hold you while you sleep. I need to see you when I wake up.”
Casey . . . Becky’s throat locked around a hard lump. Zach had managed to make her forget. Her daughter was away. Would be for three weeks. She had nothing to go home to. Except her brother—who had Silver. And her parents—who had each other. Waking up alone in a house that wasn’t hers, thinking of the moments she’d spent not thinking about her daughter at all. How could she . . .
“I can’t . . . Sir, I screwed up. I shouldn’t have done this. What if—”
“What if what, Becky? What could have happened while you were with me?”
“I don’t know. Something bad.”
“No. Your mother is still at Dean’s. He has his phone. Someone would have called him.”
“I’m her mother.”
“And Casey is with her father. You had no choice.”
Helplessness ripped through her, like someone had cracked open her chest. “It’s not fair.”
“No. It’s not. And we can talk about it more in the morning.”
Zach dressed her, then held her close to his side as he approached Dean. He spoke low, and she couldn’t make out a single word. All she could think of was what a horrible mother she was. She knew Patrick would screw up. Her daughter would need her. And she’d been so incredibly selfish—
“Rebecca, look at me.” Dean took hold of her chin, trapping her with his gaze until his words were all that mattered. “You know my number. I will call you if there’s anything. Swear to me you’ll do the same.”
Why would I need to call you? She blinked at him, confused. She was a grown woman, not a little girl who needed protection. But Dean obviously didn’t see it that way.
“I will.”
“Good.” Dean turned to Zach. “Make sure she gets some sleep. She hasn’t gotten much at my place since that asshole called her.”
“I’m not surprised.” Zach pressed her head against his chest. “But she’s tough. Don’t hesitate to call if—”
“I won’t.”
“All right.” Zach’s arm was heavy on her shoulders. Solid and steady. More so than the ground beneath her feet. “Any more objections, Becky? Tell me now.”
All that she’d thought was stable within crumbled. She rasped in a breath as she shook her head. It was ridiculous to need aftercare after the little they’d done, but she knew she did. If he’d sent her home without letting her . . .
What can I do for him? He’d mentioned talking in the morning. That could work. She could make him breakfast. Maybe clean for him.
Which was funny, because she’d hated cleaning up after her husband. He’d always been a slob. And doing things for him never meant anything. But doing things for Zach would. She relaxed against his side and let out a sigh.
“No objections. I wouldn’t have liked for the night to end like this.”
Zach chuckled and kissed her hair. “Sweetie, we’re nowhere close to the end.”
* * * *
The central air in the condo kept the temperature comfortably cool, but as Zach watched Becky step up to him, shivering, he wondered if he should turn it off. He studied her face as she took hold of the bottom of his T-shirt. She didn’t seem cold.
Nervous?
No. Excited. Maybe even impatient. Her cheeks were flushed, eyes wide and bright as she quickly pulled his shirt up over his head. She hadn’t hesitated when he’d told her to undress him. He grinned as she dropped the T-shirt and moved closer to him, exploring the muscles of his arms and chest like she couldn’t stop touching him. His eyes drifted shut as she pressed a kiss to the center of his chest, and blood pumped steadily into his dick. There was something so close to worship in the way she kissed him. The way her hands caressed him. And the look in her eyes as she lowered to her knees and undid his belt . . . it was as though, in that moment, he was her whole world.
How long had she needed this for the little he’d done to mean so much? He kept his expression neutral as he fought the urge to pull her into his arms and ask her. This wasn’t the time to force her to think about what had been lacking in her life. With how she’d reacted to receiving more than she gave, the best thing he could do was let her serve him.
He stepped out of his jeans, then clucked his tongue as she flung them aside. “Is that how you treat your Master’s things, pet?”
Becky gaped up at him, blushing even as a shy smile graced her lips. She shook her head. “No, Sir.”
After she’d folded his clothes and placed them on his dresser, she returned to him and hooked her fingers into the elastic of his boxers. She bit her lip as she eyed his erection, barely contained by the snug, black cotton.
“Wait.”
Blinking at him, she rested her hands on her thighs. He could tell she was trying to hide her disappointment—she might have succeeded if he hadn’t been watching her so carefully.
He motioned for her to stand. “I need to see you. All of you.”
Letting out a sigh of relief, she held still while he eased the slave dress off her shoulders and let it drift to the floor.
Chuckling, he tapped her chin with a finger. “What was that for?”
“It’s just . . .” Her brow furrowed. She stared at her bare feet. “I don’t understand why you waited so long to get me naked.”
His lips curved sl
ightly as he let his gaze travel slowly over her lush body, from her ample breasts to the swell of her hips. He cupped her cheek. “You were already naked to me, little doe.”
Her breath caught as he kissed her, and he smiled against her lips as she moaned softly and leaned into him. She went still as he took a knee, and he heard her swallow hard as he pulled down her skin-tone, silk panties. A shadow of stubble covered her pussy and he glanced up, taking note of her blush.
“I’m sorry I didn’t—”
“Don’t be. It pleases me that you didn’t go to the club ready to give yourself to just any man. And you haven’t tried to cover yourself from me. Very nice.” He traced a finger over her stomach, pressing his lips together when she stiffened. “What’s wrong?”
“It’s just . . . my stomach is gross.”
His brow lifted. “I don’t think it’s changed since the club.”
“No, but it was dark. You couldn’t see all the stretch marks and—”
“Stop right there and listen carefully.” He straightened, putting a hand on her hip to hold her in place. “You are beautiful. Each and every inch of you. As long as you are with me, this is my body. And I won’t accept you saying—or thinking—anything negative about what is mine. You bear those marks from carrying a precious child. You should be proud of them.”
She inhaled, then nodded. “I never thought of it that way. But I will now, Sir.”
“Good girl.” The way she glowed at the simple praise quickened his pulse. Suddenly, he had to show her, with more than words, that he meant exactly what he said. Tonight she was his, and he was desperate to claim her. But not with sex. He’d only ever fucked one person in mindless lust and passion, and he still regretted it. He refused to go there with Becky.
But there were other things he could do to her which would satisfy them both.
“I always shower before bed. Would you care to join me?”
The fact that he’d asked seemed to throw her off, but he would only go so far on taking her choices from her on the first night. Eventually, he could see them falling into a peaceful routine. But not yet.
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