by Staci Hart
I groaned and squeezed. “Fuck, Penny.”
And all she did was laugh and kiss me.
I made my way into my bedroom, lit only by a lamp next to my bed, kicking the door closed behind me before tipping her onto the bed to kiss her, to press her small body into the bed with mine. And for a long time, we lay together in my bed — my hands in her hair, on her face, reverently brushing her collarbone, and her hands in my hair, on my jaw, riding the backs of my fingers as they traced the curves I’d thought I’d never touch again.
I could have kissed Penny forever. If I was lucky, maybe I would.
But our hands and lips and bodies weren’t content with that and moved on their own. Her hips rolled gently against mine, stroking her body against the hard length of my cock, and my hips flexed in answer, my lips harder, my hand roaming to cup her breast through the thin fabric of her dress. When I thumbed the peaked flesh of her nipple between her barbell, she cupped my neck and whimpered. And that was all it took to lose my patience.
I backed off of her, and kneeling at the foot of the bed, I tugged off my shirt and flung it, hands moving for my belt and eyes on Penny shifting on the bed, watching me.
I popped my button and lowered my zipper, hooking my thumbs in the waistband to push my jeans over my ass and down my thighs, shimmying out of them with the help of Penny’s feet.
I nestled my hips against hers, the fabric between her clit and my cock thin enough that I could feel everything — the balls of her piercing, the soft, warm flesh waiting for me. But I left her dress where it was between our hips and kissed her again. I kissed the sweetness of her lips and silently told her I’d take care of her. I kissed her neck and promised her she was safe. I kissed the space between her breasts, her heart thumping against my lips, and vowed I’d never break it.
My fingers pushed the strap of her dress over the curve of her shoulder until her breast was bare, and I ran my hand over the sweet, supple flesh, pressing myself into her with an ache in my chest from the weight of all I wanted and wished for and held dear. And my lips found hers again as our bodies wound together, a knot of arms and legs and hands whose purpose was only to bring us as close as we could get.
Her hips moved with intention, inching her dress up until we were skin-to-skin. She sighed through her nose against my cheek, gave the smallest of hums against my tongue in her mouth, and I wrapped my arms around her and squeezed. She tilted her hips to press the slick center of her to the length of my cock, and it was my turn to hum.
It had been too long without her, without this. And now that I had her in my arms again, it was beyond what I’d dreamed of. Because now, she was mine.
With every flex, she angled for my crown until I gave her body what it asked of me, backing up until the tip of me rested just inside her. I waited for only a moment before I slipped into her slowly in a motion that pushed a breath from both our lungs with every aching millimeter.
I pulled out and slid in easier, faster than before but still slow, deliberate, as if I could prolong it. As if I could make it last forever. And when I hit the end of her, when our bodies were a seam, she lay underneath me, bracketed in my arms, lids heavy and eyes full of love, and I committed every sensation — mind, body, and soul — to memory.
And when I kissed her again, it was with more emotion than I knew what to do with.
I pushed the other strap of her dress over her shoulder, wanting her skin on mine, and she wiggled her arms out and pushed the dress down her ribs. Every stroke of ink on her chest was brushed by my fingertips. The feel of her metal barbells and the soft flesh between impressed themselves in my palm. Her hood piercing pressed into the skin just above my cock, giving me a target, and I ground against it with every pump of my hips until she muttered my name, hooking her legs around my waist to twist us.
I let her guide me onto my back, our bodies still connected, hers rocking as she reached across her body and grabbed her dress, pulling it off, leaving her naked. And then she braced herself on my chest and raised her ass, dropping down on me achingly slow, working my body with hers, hips rolling.
Every time I disappeared into her, my pulse raced faster until my heart hammered against my ribs, and I sat, reaching for her, winding my arms around her, burying my face in her breasts, my hands cupping her ass to lift and lower her.
She clenched around my cock once, gasped my name — the sound sweet and right and everything — and her body tensed as she squeezed me so tight, so hard that when she came, I did too with a growl and a moan and the nerves in my body so raw and connected to her that I vibrated like a tuning fork.
My hands flexed, holding her against me, rocking her gently as the last flickers worked through us. She curled into me, arms tucked into her chest and head under my chin. I wrapped my arms around her, so small and right and mine.
She was mine. I was hers. And that was it.
My fingertips skated the length of her back while we came down, and when she sighed — a heavy, satisfied sound — I lay back, taking her with me, pulling out of her. And as we lay there on our sides together, wrapped up in each other, I found myself so content, so happy. I knew right then and there that I’d do anything to hang on to that, hang on to her. I cursed myself for ever walking away.
Of course, as I slid my hand into her hair and kissed her, I realized I couldn’t have stayed away. Penny and I felt inevitable that way. I hadn’t stopped thinking of her any more than she had of me. And even though I’d been hurt, I couldn’t imagine ever really walking away. We would have found a way back to each other.
The alternative hurt too much to even think about — I’d have lost my chance at this. Because holding Penny, I knew I could spend a thousand nights like this and never get my fill.
She stirred against my chest and kissed my collarbone. I kissed her forehead in answer and whispered I’d be right back before climbing out of bed to dart across the empty hallway to the bathroom. And when I came back with a washcloth and a smile, it was met with hers. She was curled up in my bed like a cat, looking sated and content and just as happy as I was.
I crawled to her, kissing her bare hip before rolling her over onto her back to clean her up, and she watched me with a purple strand of hair between her fingers and her lip between her teeth.
“I missed you,” she said, her voice husky. “I was a mess without you.”
I chuckled. “You’re a mess with me.”
“That’s true. But so, so much worse without.”
I shook my head, marveling over the night. “I can’t believe you did all this. Where’d you get all the math material?” I tossed the washcloth in the general direction of my closet.
“Mostly the internet, but I asked one of the girls on set who’s a real math whiz.”
She reached for the covers tucked under my pillow and slipped between the sheets, and I followed her in.
“And you memorized it and everything,” I said, still smiling as I pulled her back into my chest and our legs scissored together. I wondered absently if I’d ever stop smiling.
“Mmhmm. Ronnie made flashcards.”
I laughed at that.
“I just … I’m sorry I didn’t try harder sooner. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you how I felt from the start.”
“It’s all right,” I said quietly.
“But it’s not. Bodie, I know it’s no excuse, but I’ve been this way for a long time and for a lot of reasons that seem really stupid now.” She took a breath. “You remember how it was with me and Rodney in high school?”
My fingers dragged across her shoulder blades and back again. “I remember.”
“He used to manipulate me, gaslight me to make me think I was crazy, which made me crazier. It was like a self-fulfilling prophecy. And even at that, I never left him.”
“Penny, you aren’t responsible for what he did to you. And plus, we were just kids then.”
She backed away and propped herself up on her elbow. “But see, it changed me. I looked at what happened with him and
knew I didn’t want to feel that way anymore, ever again. And in my brain, that meant not letting myself care about anybody. So I conditioned myself over eight years. And everything went along shipshape, until I met you. You came along with your dimple and torpedo cock and sank my battleship.”
A laugh burst out of me, and she smiled.
“But then I was drowning. Clearly, I do not know how to swim. It was cruel really,” she teased.
“I’m not sorry I sank your battleship, and neither is my torpedo.” I propped my head on my hand.
Penny giggled, her cheeks rosy and smile warm. “I ain’t mad atcha. That ship was a bucket of bolts.” She paused, perking up. “Oh, I meant to ask you how your hand was.”
I showed her my knuckles, which were almost fully healed. “All better.”
She held hers up with a smirk— they were a little scraped up. “Mine too.”
My brow quirked, and I reached for her hand to inspect it. “What happened?”
“Well, I couldn’t let you be the only one to get licks in on Rodney.”
A surprised laugh shot out of me. “You’re kidding.”
She shook her head. “He called you a loser, and I punched him in the eye.”
I laughed even more and kissed the back of her hand.
“And then he called me a psycho, and I kneed him in the balls.”
That one earned her a kiss on the lips.
“God, I wish I’d seen that.”
“There might be a YouTube video out there somewhere. Who knows?”
I chuckled. “Well, I have a confession to make since we’re confessing things.”
One of her brows rose. “Oh?”
“Mmhmm.” I watched her, smiling. “I knew from the jump that I wanted to be with you, and I knew I’d have my work cut out for me when it came to convincing you to let me stick around longer than a few dates.”
Her mouth opened in a red O that wasn’t at all serious. “You fucking sneak! Heart-ninja sneak, with your heart-ninja stars that make girls fall for you. I’ve been tricked.”
I chuckled and rested my hand on her hip under the blanket. “More like lion tamer than a ninja.”
She lit up. “Ooh, do you have a whip?”
“No, but I can get one.” I leaned forward to kiss her, laughing through my nose.
“I like it. I’m the lion. How are you gonna keep me from eating your face off?”
“Just gotta keep you well fed.” I pulled her hips into mine to show her just what I could feed her.
She laughed. “That’ll do.”
I smiled at her for a minute. “Scared?”
“Fucking terrified.”
“Trust me?”
And she leaned into me, cupping my jaw as she said against my lips, “Without a doubt.”
24
DONUT YOU KNOW?
Penny
The sun broke in through Bodie’s window, shining a ray of light across his nose and lips, illuminating them from behind and casting them in shadows in the same feat of physics.
I didn’t know how long it had been since I’d woken — not overly long, I didn’t think — but I didn’t care to move. I didn’t care if my phone had a bazillion texts or if the world was on fire. All I wanted to do was lie there next to Bodie.
I watched him sleep with a smile on my face. His hand rode his chest up and down as he breathed slow and deep, and his hair was mussed, his face soft and young and beautiful. And in that moment, I swear I was the luckiest girl on the whole planet.
Somehow, he’d taken me back. Somehow, we were going to be together, and as scary as that was, I had no fight-or-flight urge at all. I had the love-and-snuggle urges instead, which was far preferable.
He pulled in a loud breath and shifted as he woke, and I lay there, practically bouncing as I waited for him to open his eyes.
When he did, they found mine, and he smiled.
“Hey,” he said sleepily.
“So, whatcha doing today?”
He chuckled and rolled over to grab me and pull me into him, nuzzling into my neck. “Hopefully, you.”
“That’s a guarantee. Wanna spend the day together?”
“Mmhmm.” He kissed my neck, slipping his thigh between my legs. “I wanna take you on a date.”
“Ooh, fancy.” I wrapped my arms around his neck and hitched my leg onto his hip.
“Fancy date for my shiny Penny.”
I smiled and pulled him even closer. “Can we go by my place and pick up some stuff?”
“Yep,” he said against my skin as his hand roamed down my ribs to my ass, his fingertips grazing places that made my heart speed up and hips squirm against his very morning wood.
I hummed and slipped my fingers into his hair. “Good. And can I stay the night again?”
“Pen, you can stay as long as you want.” He licked the skin of my neck and kissed the hollow behind my jaw.
“You won’t get sick of me?”
“Not possible,” he whispered in my ear.
“But maybe it is; you don’t know,” I said as he cupped my breast, thumbing my nipple while he kissed my neck as if it tasted like honey.
“You’re probably right,” he muttered between kisses, shifting his hips to angle for me. “I’m sure today will be awful. All that talking.” Kiss. “Hanging out.” Kiss. “Eating.” Kiss. “Fucking,” he said as he pressed his tip against my pussy and flexed, filling me up with a kablam that made fireworks go off behind my eyelids.
I had no words after that. My lips were too busy with his. My body was too busy processing the feeling of him sliding in and out of me, full and then empty, over and over. My mind was too busy with the realization of just how gone I was over him. And my heart was too busy opening up to let him in.
Bodie fucked me slow and sweet in the golden morning sunshine, and I wished for a hundred more mornings just like it. My whole life, I’d been missing this, missing him, and now that I had him, I wouldn’t give him up so easily. Maybe not at all.
A few hours later, we were laughing and holding hands and walking back to his place from mine. I’d packed a bag and gotten nailed good and hard in the shower, and found myself starving, so we ducked into a donut shop to grab a dozen.
He assured me it wasn’t our date.
Just saying — I would have given him an A-plus if it had been.
By the time we got back to his place, I’d convinced him through begging — whining — to let me play his video game demo. He actually had the nerve to ask me if I knew how to use the controller.
Fortunately, he had Mortal Kombat, and I blew his mind up with all the things he thought he’d knew about me but had no idea. Nobody fucked with Sub-Zero. Not even Bodie, video-game-genius-of-the-world-and-my-heart.
And then I played his game.
It was glorious. For twenty too-short minutes, I ran through a temple solving puzzles and watched cut scenes that looked almost like they were out of a movie. While eating donuts and getting cinnamon sugar all over everything. While Bodie watched me like I was a goddess.
He made me feel like a goddess.
It was in the small moments — him smiling down at me as he opened the door to the restaurant that night, holding my hand across the candlelit table while we ate, the look in his eyes when he told me how happy he was.
But Bodie made me feel like more. He made me feel loved and treasured.
And the best part was that I loved and treasured him too.
At the time, in the moment, I couldn’t place the feeling, the whisper of premonition. I just knew that my life would never be the same. I knew I didn’t want to be without him. I knew he’d take care of me, and I knew I’d take care of him too.
That night, we made love in the moonlight. That night, I lost my heart to him forever, and I never wanted it back.
I had his instead.
Epilogue
Penny - Two Years Later
It was June in New York, which meant it was hot as fuck, but things were looking u
p. A double scoop of salted caramel was in my hand-slash-mouth, and Bodie was smiling at me from across the table of the ice cream shop where I’d seen him for the first time since high school.
I moaned as I took a long lick of my ice cream, eyes rolling back in my head, hand resting on my very pregnant belly.
“Jesus, fuck, that is so good,” I mumbled around a full mouth, not even swallowing before I went back for more. “I swear, everything tastes better when you’re knocked up.”
He chuckled and licked his ice cream. “Feel better?”
“Mmhmm.” I swallowed. “I’m sorry I’ve been such a raging bitch. It’s just so fucking hot and I’m so fucking fat and I’m so fucking hungry. But this ice cream is so fucking good.”
“You’re not a bitch, Pen.”
I barked out a single laugh. “That’s funny. I nearly slit your throat this morning for leaving your shoes in the living room after I almost tripped and fell and broke my neck. You know I can’t see anything past this.” I gestured to my stomach. “I haven’t seen my feet in a month. Who even knows what my bush looks like.”
He laughed. “Trust me, it looks perfect.”
“Psh, you say that now. Wait until I push your baby out of it. God, my vag is gonna look like a roast beef sandwich.” I frowned, bummed out. And just like that, I thought I might cry.
“Penny,” he said sternly, “your pussy is pink and perfect and mine and nothing will change that.”
I sighed and reached for his hand. “I fucking love you.”
He smiled. “I fucking love you too.”
“Even though I’ve spent a small fortune on fancy stretch-mark lotions?”
“Yep.”
“Even though I’m crazy?”
“Especially because you’re crazy.”
I sighed and licked my ice cream. “You’re the best, babe. You’re like a unicorn.”
“A sex unicorn?”
“I dunno what that is but clearly, the answer is yes.” I pointed to my stomach.
“Hmm, well, the sex unicorn is horny.” He took a lick, eyes twinkling.
