by Kahlen Aymes
“Yes, well, the next time that happens, you can bet I’ll keep my goddamned mouth shut.”
“I’ll believe that when I see it. You have no reason to be jealous.”
“You did leave me. Twice.”
Angel pulled back and looked directly into his face, a little crinkle appearing above the bridge of her nose as she frowned. This was good. Talking was what they needed. “I know. But, not because I didn’t love you. I loved you… that’s why I left the first time. I didn’t want Mark Swanson to hurt you. That’s all it was. I just couldn’t bear the thought of something happening to you.”
He shifted beneath her and took both of her hands in his, threading their fingers together, his lungs felt ridged, unable to expand. “He could have killed you.”
“This isn’t about him, Alex. Don’t sidetrack me.”
Alex knew she was right, and he wanted to concentrate on her. It pissed him off because that cocksucker was still in his head, and he would be until he was behind bars. “My point is we’re stronger together.”
Angel nodded. “I know that now. But, I was scared… and professionally bound to keep it to myself. It was so hard to try to convince you I didn’t want you.”
Alex wondered if that professional ethics bullshit would still be in place after he was her husband because, illegal or not, he was damn well going to know what the fuck was going on with her. “I knew you wanted me. That’s why it fucked me up so bad.”
“I was heartbroken. I almost suffocated myself with a pillow to keep from screaming. I sat in my closet and cried.”
Alex’s eyes softened, and his thumb rubbed back and forth over the top of her hand tenderly. “Oh honey. It was so needless and so unlike you. All you had to do was tell me, and I would have handled it. I was already working on taking that motherfucker down, anyway.”
“Ah… which leads to the other side of the secrets. Do you want to be the pot or the kettle?”
“You were so stubborn. It felt like I had no choice.” Their eyes were locked together and didn’t waver, neither of them moving a muscle other than his thumb over her skin. “So now you tell me everything. Professional ethics bullshit notwithstanding.”
“Yes. No more secrets.”
“Finally,” Alex teased with an overly exaggerated sigh. He smiled when a giggle burst from Angel. Finally.
*****
“Anga!” Jillian squealed loudly into Angel’s ear as she squirmed on her lap. “Are you coming for my birfday?”
Angel and Becca had picked Jillian up from Becca’s parents’ house and trekked to Chuck E. Cheese’s in one of the western suburbs after their Saturday morning workout. True to form, Jillian was stuck to Angel like glue, giggling and shoving the atrocious pizza into her mouth.
“Of course! I wouldn’t miss your birthday! Who’s coming to your party?”
Angel had spoken to Becca about it and she already knew that a week and a half from now, there would be a big party. She was helping plan it, complete with face painting, balloon animals, and dress-up activities. It was a little over the top, but Angel insisted on helping to pay for it. The little girl would be three, and they were inviting some of her pre-school friends, their parents, and of course, Becca’s parents.
“You, Gramma and Pops, Amanda, Sally, and Miranda! Mama says we’z is gonna be peencesses!” The chubby pink cheeks were rosy and more pronounced as she smiled, and her blue eyes danced. Angel adored her and ran a hand down her blonde curls, kissing her head. Jillian held a piece of pizza up with both hands and took a bite.
“We are?”
“Yep!” She chewed and tried to talk at the same time.
“Jillian, don’t speak with your mouth full,” Becca reminded, her blue eyes meeting Angel’s dark brown ones. She hadn’t seen Angel this happy in a while; maybe never. She was glowing, her eyes sparkling, and her smile had been constant all day.
Angel wiped at the corner of Jillian’s mouth with a napkin and smiled happily down into the little one’s face.
“Princesses! Wow! That sounds exciting! Which one do you want to be?”
Jillian thought about it for a while, her lower lip popping out a bit. “Uh, Cinderella. I yike her. She has yellow hair yike me.”
Angel widened her eyes and nodded. “Oh, that would be beautiful! I think we need to go to the salon and get our hair and make-up done, shouldn’t we?”
“Angel, the other little girls will feel bad if we do that.”
She hadn’t thought about that, and she certainly didn’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings. She shrugged. “Okay, I agree. I’ll just ask Lauren and a couple of the other stylists to come to the party and we can do it there.”
“That’s too expensive, Angel.”
“Shush. My girl is having a birthday!”
“You spoil her.”
“Only on her birthday!”
Becca’s eyebrow shot up. “Yeah, sure.”
Angel laughed, and Becca examined her friend’s features.
In the days since Mark Swanson had attacked, Angel had been vulnerable, and Becca was shocked at how beaten up she was—her bruises were starting to turn yellowish as they healed. Becca had seen her, but Angel had refused to allow Jillian to see her with a full-blown back eye and bruises to her cheek, neck, and chin. Those were just the visible ones. Becca knew there had been more.
“How does Alex look?”
“His shoulder was pretty banged up, but he’s taking it like a man,” Angel said with a soft smile.
“As if there were any doubt.” Becca’s eyes twinkled mischievously.
The women had always talked a lot about the men in their lives, and Becca was happy to see Angel with someone like Alex, but there were still details she wanted to know. Angel was the best friend she’d ever had, and she wanted to see her happy and settled. She was always so into her work and worried about other people; it would require someone as charismatic as Alexander Avery to pull Angel out of her self-preservation mode. Angel needed someone who was as strong, maybe even stronger, than she was so she could allow herself to be vulnerable and trust unconditionally. Her own past wasn’t peachy keen either, and both of them had relied upon the other to get through some serious shit.
“So?” Becca prodded, picking up a piece of the offensive pizza and sniffing it, then wrinkling her nose. Children were everywhere, and the place was loud with music, screaming kids, and the various clanging, beeping and bells from the electronic games that lined all the walls.
“So, things are good. I’m trying hard not to be a typical, whiney female. It’s hard not to worry, when…” Her voice dropped and a wry expression crossed her face. She shrugged.
“When you love someone so much,” Becca filled in the blank with a cautious look on her pretty face.
“Yes.”
“Hallelujah. Amen!” Becca’s mouth twisted wryly. “It’s about goddamned time you admitted it!”
Jillian held out both of her hands toward a sippy cup filled with soda, her little fingers waving at it in silent request. Without thinking, Angel reached forward and handed it to the little girl. “What?” Her brow wrinkled. “I told you very early in that Alex was unavoidable.”
“Yeah. But you were so guarded,” Becca answered. “So this is it, though?”
“Uh huh.”
“Uh huh.” Becca eyed Angel with skepticism. “You’re not going to run away or sabotage the relationship? Because, even though I thought he was going to just be good sex, I can see that you’re different. Softer now. He’s totally got you.”
Becca’s words sent a thrill through Angel. Yes, he had her, all right.
“Don’t go getting all mushy or philosophical on me. I admit I’ve been struggling, but I’ve seen Alex struggle too. It makes it more real, and I believe this is different for both of us.”
“I’m just glad you finally decided to give him a chance. I didn’t want to have to kick your sweet ass.”
Still clinging to her cup, Jillian looked up. “Tweet
ass!” she shouted out.
Angel’s eyes widened and snapped up to meet Becca’s as a snooty looking woman and an older lady from the next table gave Angel and Becca a disapproving once-over. Angel and Becca giggled; Becca coughed and tried to remain somber as she corrected the little girl, and Angel covered her mouth with her hand to hide her smile.
“Sweetie, only mommies can say that word.”
The little girl frowned, unsure what her mother was talking about. “No, Mama! Anga, too! I hear-ed Anga say it, too.” Jillian’s face was so innocent and matter-of-fact as she gnawed on her pizza, and it was even harder to hold the laughter at bay. “She say’d it ayot!”
Becca laughed because she couldn’t help herself, and Angel was the one trying to stifle the laughter. “Angel will stop. Your mommy is right, Bean. Grown-ups say stuff they shouldn’t sometimes. But not sweet little girls, like you. Okay?”
The little head bobbed up and down. “Kay.”
“Good.”
Becca watched the interaction between her little girl and best friend. Angel would be an amazing mother someday, and it was a blessing she had finally found someone who was a mental and emotional match for her. Didn’t hurt that, physically, he was a god. Becca sighed ruefully. Maybe someday she would have someone she could love like that. She’d seen Alex’s brother, Cole, a few times when he was with Angel but only made small talk with him. He was attractive in a big way. They obviously had great genes, though he wasn’t as polished as Alex.
“I’m surprised you don’t have your pack of followers with you this morning,” Becca observed as her thoughts took her to the obvious. “How’d you manage that?”
“Alex was with me, so he called off the dogs.”
Becca’s face twisted and she frowned. “Yes, but he’s not with you now.”
At the same moment, Jillian squealed and wiggled off Angel’s lap to begin running from the table. “Zander! Zander!”
Angel’s eyes caught sight of Alex walking toward them, even bending to scoop up Jillian and tossing her gently in the air; he still oozed sex, muscles working under his clothes.
Jillian giggled and screamed in delight. “Momma and Anga are there!” She pointed in their direction, and Alex’s intense green gaze landed on Angel’s. She could see he was not happy with her, though he hid it well when he spoke to Jillian.
“I left him a note telling him where I’d be.”
“He’s gonna be hot. I mean… he is hot.” Becca’s eyes took in Alex’s messy hair shoved underneath a baseball cap and his unshaven jaw before roaming over the midnight blue fitted V-neck T-shirt and expensive jeans. His biceps and chest muscles flexed as he tossed Jillian again. “But he’s got to be pissed!”
“I’m sick of being tailed. I love Cole, but the others get on my nerves. I feel like I’m in jail.” She watched him with Jillian and something inside her chest clenched. He was so perfect. Every woman in the room from twenty to seventy-five was gazing at him as if they’d never seen a man before, and he was hers. A shiver of satisfaction shot down her spine at the thought.
She scooted over in the booth to make room, and Alex slid in next to her, settling Jillian on his lap, who turned in his arms and ran a little hand across his scruffy cheek. “You gots whiskies! Pops gots whiskies, too.”
“I do! Because I ran out of the apartment in a hurry.” He shot a hard glance in Angel’s direction, so she slid a hand onto his inside of his thigh and squeezed. He huffed, the corner of his mouth quirked, as she smiled at him sweetly, silently bribing him to lighten-up.
“I’m fine,” Angel murmured under her breath.
“It’s pokey!” Jillian stated, still touching Alex’s face.
“It is!” Angel agreed.
Becca decided she needed to give Alex and Angel some time alone. “Come on, sweets! Let’s go play some games.”
“Zander, can you p’yay with me?”
He kissed her cheek. “I’d love to, and I will in just a minute, sweetheart.”
“Kay. Are you hungy? We have pizza!”
“I see that!” Alex said indulgently. “Okay, I’ll have a piece then come play games with you.”
Angel’s forehead came down to touch Alex’s broad shoulder, and she squeezed his thigh again. Becca rose and lifted Jillian off of Alex’s lap, turning away with her toward the arcade portion of the restaurant.
Angel lifted her head and looked into Alex’s profile. His jaw was set, and she could see him fighting with himself as he reached for the disgusting pizza. She knew he wanted to yell and scream at her, but her hand on his thigh and the way she leaned into him softened him as she knew it would.
“Zander will you play with me?” Angel teased sweetly, echoing Jillian’s innocent question.
“Hmmph!” He grunted and tried to keep a straight face. There was nothing he wanted to do more than play with her and she knew it.
“Don’t be mad.”
He closed his eyes briefly then glanced in her direction. Steady, his eyes held hers. “We agreed no secrets.”
“What secret? I left a note.”
“You know I don’t want you out without—”
Angel interrupted with a sigh. “Yes! I know! But I’m so tired of it. Babe, come on. I can’t stand having someone follow me around all the time. I can’t pee! I can’t buy tampons! It’s out of hand, not to mention annoying.”
The muscle in his jaw worked as his teeth clenched. “It hasn’t been that long, and Swanson did make bail. He has to have some sort of resources. I don’t trust that he’ll leave you alone.”
“I know,” she answered gently.
“So don’t ask me to take risks with you!” His voice was low but with an undercurrent of anger.
“You’re very sweet to worry about me, but I’m perfectly safe. Can we compromise?”
“Why does everything have to be a fucking negotiation?” He grunted and lifted the pizza to his mouth. It was soggy and floppy. After one bite he grimaced and he threw it back on the plate.
“You aren’t the one under constant supervision! How about this? We go to the gym and I’ll show you I can take care of myself! I’ve been working on self-defense and fighting with Becs. If I kick your ass, you let me have some freedom. Deal?”
“Even if you can kick the shit out of someone one-on-one, it might be a group of them. Have you forgotten the last time?”
“No. I got away from two of them,” Angel pointed out. “So compromise?”
“Sure. When I’m not with you, Cole or one of the others is with you at all times. End of compromise.”
Angel cocked her head, an exasperated expression flashing on her features. “Ugh! You’re impossible. Okay, how about this? I’ll stay with you at the estate if you lighten up a little.”
“Angel. Enough. I want you to stay with me at the estate but not enough to take risks with you. You’ll stay with me because we can’t be away from each other, and that’s it.”
Angel huffed and pulled her hand off of his leg, but he moved quickly and grabbed it in his.
“Are you going to dispute it? It’s a fact.”
“No. It’s just—”
His fingers threaded through hers, and his eyes softened. “It’s just the way it is. Besides, Max misses you, and if you don’t mind, I’d like to fucking breathe.”
Her breath left, and she understood his frustration. He loved her. And, she loved him more than she loved total independence.
Alex continued as Angel paused. “I have to go out of town, and I know you won’t go with me, so I want you at the house. I may even have Cole stay there with you.”
“Even with the new security system?”
“Yes. Why take risks?”
“At some point, we have to have a normal life.”
“I agree. But it’s too soon. That bastard is out there.”
“Cole mentioned you’re having Swanson tailed, too.”
“I am. So?”
“So, in that case, I’ll ask Becca to stay with m
e. It would give me some time with Jillian, and she’d love Max.”
“She can stay, but I still want Cole there. The house is big enough. He won’t bother you.”
“He doesn’t bother me. In fact, he should get to know Becca. Don’t you think?”
“I don’t know. He’s more responsible, but she has the baby, and I wouldn’t want her to get involved with him until I’m certain he wouldn’t fuck her over. Jillian doesn’t need to get attached to someone who won’t stick around for the long haul. She already has one loser dad.”
“Bean will be okay. If not, I’ll kick Cole’s ass.” His thumb started rubbing the top of her hand and he was joking around. She knew he wasn’t angry any longer. He was so good. Her heart swelled with love for him. She could deal with his controlling, over-bearing ways. She knew it was only because he cared. He was so concerned for her, and for those she loved.
“Okay.” One thing was certain. Alexander Avery would make one stellar dad to some lucky kid someday. The knowledge flowed over Angel like a warm blanket of honey.
His hand was still laced with hers, and he used his other to touch her chin and nudge it up. “Okay,” he repeated her words then settled his mouth on hers for a warm, gentle kiss. He lifted his head then kissed her once more before pulling back. “My mother and father invited us out to dinner on Friday night. Will you come with me?”
“Will Ally and Cole be there?” Angel had to ask. Obviously, Cole and Ally knew the two of them were dating, so she assumed his parents would be curious.
“No. It’s just us.” He didn’t elaborate, but he wanted her to meet his parents, and it was important they have an opportunity to talk to her and get to know her. He knew they’d love her as much as he did. He wanted to meet her father, too, but wasn’t sure how to finagle that without sounding pushy or giving her clues about his intended proposal. He knew he wanted to do it right, though, and that meant meeting her father and getting his permission before he asked her to marry him.
“Wow. That sounds kind of official.”
“It kind of is.”
His finger traced the line of her face, both of them staring at each other. Angel’s sweet mouth split into a bright smile, and he was pleased the prospect made her happy and not reticent. “I can do official. Before the show, then?”
